Update p. 14 Does this guy have a right to complain? Vol. Help a sista out.

Originally Posted by SShanique

I don't know why people keep telling me to stop playing games. I don't think I'm playing any games. At least I'm not trying to play any games.


Really though.. You look reeeeally old fashioned. Were you raised by your grandparents by any chance? Are your parents older than most of your peers parents?Did you grow up in the country?

All serious questions.
 
Originally Posted by SShanique

Originally Posted by Food4Thgt

So are we getting pics or not????

I can tell you right now the answer to your question if you just provide pics... REAL TALK ..NT just wants to help..
Why do you people love pictures so much? I'm not showing my face, but this is me after court one day.




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INFO ON THE COAT....I DECIDED I'M GONNA START ROCKING WOMEN'S COATS.
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Originally Posted by SShanique

I don't know why people keep telling me to stop playing games. I don't think I'm playing any games. At least I'm not trying to play any games.
how old are you & how many men have you been involved with? (like relations hip)
 
Originally Posted by ATLien Seeko

SShanique wrote:
Dathbgboy wrote:
U gave off the vibe that u wasn't feelin him but u coulda at least said hi. I'm startin to wonder about u and what goes on in ur head miss
Do you not understand him dissing me first by not calling? I've only given my number out to 3 guys in my life: my ex, a gay boy I hoped wouldn't call, and now this guy. It was a big deal to me, and I waited for him to call. What am I supposed to be thinking?




You cannot be serious? If you're serious about that statement, this is part of your problem. You need experience. How old are you? If you're in your 20's you better learn fast before you end up a bitter old Deliver Us From Eva "Successful Indipendent Black Woman" type figure. That's real.

SShanique wrote:
blackmagnus514 wrote:
this is why he's tapping anther female who's being straight forward.

pardon the bluntness...but i had a few drinks.
That's another thing that I think about. I see him every few weeks, and I don't know him outside of the workplace. He could very well be interested in another girl, so I wouldn't want to look dumb expressing my interest if he's into someone else. I must also add that we live in Whitesville, USA. There are enough white girls to go around, but he's interested in me, the black chick. Actually, the last time I saw him at his restaurant, he was surrounded by two white girls who were talking to him. Granted, they work for him, but I couldn't help but to be jealous. I started thinking if he has a number of white girls available to him, then why would he choose me? That also factored into my thinking of why he didn't call me. I'm not totally sure what's going on. I know I think he's the bomb, so I don't see why no one would have snatched him up already. I'm apprehensive about the whole situation.




Again, for the sake of your future, I hope that you're mad young (15-17yrs. old)... Your insecurities will get you nowhere. You need to put all that aside. If YOU'RE the one that's trying to get with him, you need to put the thought of any other female, regardless of race, out of psyche. It's you and him. That insecurity issue will carry on to a relationship and will make it fail in the longrun, so you need to take care of that asap. And to be honest, it's not something you can fix in one day, you need time to get to know yourself and what you want before things can go smooth with anyone outside of yourself. If you have to wonder if a guy going "WOOOOO!!" like Rick Flare (
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) is an insult, or a compliment (could have been a joke?), then you definitely need to take some time to get to know yourself and you'll find out how you want people to treat you through that process. Imagine if you started dating him and he's at his job with two "white girls" discussing work related issues with him and you see it... Your insecurities will make ruin that relationship... Fast. About that "white girl" thing... Again, when you find out who you are and know yourself well then you'll be proud of whatever color you are and what you have to offer and you'll learn that if people dont want what you have to offer then they're not worth your time...

So, first thing's first. Take care of yourself. You're not ready for a serious relationship. Maybe have him as a friend and you can talk to him and learn a few things.

Good luck.
Yeah, I know I'm older, but I've been in a couple of long-term relationships for several years. Other than that, I really haven'tdated. I don't remember how Eva was in that movie, other than she was very mean. I'm a sweetheart, though. I get what you're saying, as well. The "white girl" thing only bothered me, because 1) he didn't call, 2) he's white, so why would he prefer to date a black girl is whatI'd like to know. I'm sure none of those girls will ever be a lawyer, and with him being a business owner, that may be a part of my appeal to him. That's actually why I am interested in him, because he is young and ambitious like I am. Just going in there, seeing those girls with him caught me offguard. I was going over there to encourage him to call since he hadn't already. That was 5 days after he had gotten my number.
 
Originally Posted by SShanique

Originally Posted by Food4Thgt

So are we getting pics or not????

I can tell you right now the answer to your question if you just provide pics... REAL TALK ..NT just wants to help..
Why do you people love pictures so much? I'm not showing my face, but this is me after court one day.




i4r909.jpg


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Originally Posted by blackmagnus514

they all are "submissive" if you know how to press the right buttons.

"A chick is a chick, a nut is a nut/and they always keep an attitude till you butter em up"

Recently, I've been learning that despite all this Xena Warrior Princess ##* they exhibit..they're still women who need to be understood. I'm talking armchair psychologist status...then you can break it down from there.
lulz
I don't even think you realize how wide open you are. If you ever come across an alpha female, like a true hunter(not a !!@%% but a hunter inpersonality)...good luck. Like how some men who are true hunters. I got some friends that would eat you alive just off the fact that you think being submissiveis a weak trait. Never assume you know the person who you think you are better than. Especially in dealing with submission. You already lost by taking aweakness like gender and thinking you are superior and that you can read women just because of that. Like if a press a button and talk it out, get into hermind you will automatically be in with a woman.


I can admit that's where some women go wrong....thinking there P is power over men just off break and that they can play mind games. By doing that youcreate a lot of salty dudes and exploitation of there sex.
 
Originally Posted by CheGTR

Originally Posted by SShanique

Originally Posted by CheGTR

zzz...
seriously, this woman is the only woman that needs to man up.

ask HIM questions.. like, hey so watsup with you? single, etc? Lets do this, lets do that, lets go here or there, together holding hands.
Its 2010, women can set plans too. for real. i swear.


YOU said u realized hes interested because he asked aobut you. when do you ask about him? why didnt u try talking to him before? Why is it when HE comes in you are available to talk all a sudden.


BUMP that! I woulda dropped long tiem ago. (=his thoughts)
Truth be told, I was interested in him first. I had this new serving job for the summer (but stayed into the school year). Anyway, my boss talks all the time, and he would talk about this restaurant across the street that he sometimes picked up pizza at. One morning he told me he took fresh basil to the restaurant owner across the street. Well, later that afternoon, this young guy drove up in a Mercedes. He came in and asked for my boss. I told him he wasn't there, so he said that my boss had brought him some fresh basil. Okay, my bosses are in their 50s, so I was expecting the owner of the restaurant across the street to be old. He asked for a menu to order something to go. Then he started calling someone. He told me that he was eating in. I liked what I saw, so I started asking him questions about himself. I learned that he was a 25-year-old Italian. Some people came to join him, a woman and a little boy. I thought it was his girlfriend and son, and then he said, "This is my sister." He was not interested in me at all then. I didn't see him for like 3 months, and then the first time we saw each other after that, he was different. He seemed to have missed seeing me, and he was asking all kinds of personal questions. It was then that he learned I was in law school, that I was older than he thought (although I told him how old I was the first day I met him. He didn't care back then, though), and he told me I could come to the birthday party he was having in 2 days.
EXACTLY...and so now u know he's interested at least a bit. So tell him you 2 should spend more time alone. Easy to say something like, "when do i see you outside of mine or your restaurant?"
Then take it from there, Trust, men who have something going on in there lives, would enjoy a woman who approached them in some way like that.

You really dont need to respond or go back & forth in here anymore. You know whats up already. so do your thing for once, u kno?

BUT, i gotta say, a moderately attractive young guy owning/managing a restaurant, gets ALOT of attention. My dude, who was 22-23 at the time, managed a downtown restaraunt/bar (Philly Center city area) and it was a MESS how much attention he got. He dressed up slightly because it was a somewhat upper class/nightlife place and he had his way or could have with alot of females there.
It was essentially a ****show, we'd b staying late night after closing, with free drinks and select people allowed to stay with us drinking, smoking indoors, etc...bartenders, waiters, all of em did/dealt alot of drugs and etc. Place was a mess (but we had grrrreat times of course).
And a young manager in a downtown/city/metro/ area restaruant (especially with a latenight bar) will get hit on TONS. And if he's rolling around in a Benz, he probably feels HE gets to choose whoever he wants to (and maybe does). Just letting you know. Dont gas yourself.

You're the female, women should ALWAYS be in control because being attractive, gets you whoever you want...sad but true.
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Maybe you can befriend a waiter/bartender there and ask about how he is, or how the bar is or how things are run there...restaurant biz downtown is like a secret society. Here they even have latenight bars that stay open as the rest of the city closes. (philly is early, close at 2am).


uhh...think I've said too much.
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Good luck.
The good thing for me is the restaurant is not in a big city. It's on the outskirts of a college town. I mostly see old people in there. Iknow hardly any young people come into the restaurant I work in. Granted, he gets a lot more customers than we do, I get the feeling that he doesn't see alot of young single girls over there unless they work for him. Also, they just started back selling alcohol. He had previously had his license taken away andfined, because an employee served someone alcohol who was underage. Thanks for the input.

Population of the city where we work:

  • White Non-Hispanic (74.1%)
  • Hispanic (19.7%)
  • Other race (11.1%)
  • Two or more races (2.3%)
  • American Indian (1.8%)
  • Native Hawaiian and Other Pacific Islander (1.6%)
  • Other Asian (1.2%)
  • Black (0.8%)
Population in July 2008: 68,180. Population change since 2000: +48.9%

Males: 33,838
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(49.6%)
Females: 34,342
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(50.4%)

Median resident age:
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31.0 years
Arkansas median age:
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36.0 years
 
Originally Posted by SShanique

Originally Posted by Food4Thgt

So are we getting pics or not????

I can tell you right now the answer to your question if you just provide pics... REAL TALK ..NT just wants to help..
Why do you people love pictures so much? I'm not showing my face, but this is me after court one day.




i4r909.jpg
Hmmm.. I'd do some thangs.
 
Originally Posted by ATLien Seeko

Originally Posted by SShanique

I don't know why people keep telling me to stop playing games. I don't think I'm playing any games. At least I'm not trying to play any games.


Really though.. You look reeeeally old fashioned. Were you raised by your grandparents by any chance? Are your parents older than most of your peers parents? Did you grow up in the country?

All serious questions.

You think I look old-fashioned in that picture? Umm, no. My parents are not that old. I was not raised by my grandparents, but I did grow up in the country. I don't get how I look old-fashioned. I look classy. I had just come from prosecuting criminals in court. How do you expect me to have dressed forthat?
 
*dead* @ race traitor.

what I mean is that these chicks who have these "boss" traits....at the end of the day, they're still women. They still emote more and especiallyrespect men who can upgrade them. I have female friends who exhibit these qualities and stay telling me about how they dont respect "soft men" andhow they wanna meet men who can show leadership abilities.

that's what i mean.


Shooot...i'd like to come across an alpha female. As long as she's a woman and doesnt play games, I'm all good for it. Show me where I took thembeing women for a weakness?
Like if a press a button and talk it out, get into her mind you will automatically be in with a woman.

I never said that. I said that you have to learn how to be an "armchair psychologist" and learn how to converse with and analyze the women youdeal with and then break it down from there. Would you rather date or meet a guy who was totally self-centered?

I'd surely hope not.
 
Originally Posted by DAYTONA 5000

Originally Posted by SShanique

I don't know why people keep telling me to stop playing games. I don't think I'm playing any games. At least I'm not trying to play any games.
how old are you & how many men have you been involved with? (like relations hip)

I'm in my mid-late 20s and there's only been 1, by my choice of course.
 
Originally Posted by SShanique

Originally Posted by ATLien Seeko

Originally Posted by SShanique

I don't know why people keep telling me to stop playing games. I don't think I'm playing any games. At least I'm not trying to play any games.


Really though.. You look reeeeally old fashioned. Were you raised by your grandparents by any chance? Are your parents older than most of your peers parents? Did you grow up in the country?

All serious questions.

You think I look old-fashioned in that picture? Umm, no. My parents are not that old. I was not raised by my grandparents, but I did grow up in the country. I don't get how I look old-fashioned. I look classy. I had just come from prosecuting criminals in court. How do you expect me to have dressed for that?
It's just the hair and that headband.
 
Originally Posted by SShanique

Originally Posted by ATLien Seeko

Originally Posted by SShanique

I don't know why people keep telling me to stop playing games. I don't think I'm playing any games. At least I'm not trying to play any games.


Really though.. You look reeeeally old fashioned. Were you raised by your grandparents by any chance? Are your parents older than most of your peers parents? Did you grow up in the country?

All serious questions.

You think I look old-fashioned in that picture? Umm, no. My parents are not that old. I was not raised by my grandparents, but I did grow up in the country. I don't get how I look old-fashioned. I look classy. I had just come from prosecuting criminals in court. How do you expect me to have dressed for that?


hmmm...when i first saw the picture i thought you were coming out of church... #imjustsayin
 
Originally Posted by StrongMind3

Originally Posted by SShanique

Originally Posted by ATLien Seeko

Originally Posted by SShanique

I don't know why people keep telling me to stop playing games. I don't think I'm playing any games. At least I'm not trying to play any games.


Really though.. You look reeeeally old fashioned. Were you raised by your grandparents by any chance? Are your parents older than most of your peers parents? Did you grow up in the country?

All serious questions.

You think I look old-fashioned in that picture? Umm, no. My parents are not that old. I was not raised by my grandparents, but I did grow up in the country. I don't get how I look old-fashioned. I look classy. I had just come from prosecuting criminals in court. How do you expect me to have dressed for that?


hmmm...when i first saw the picture i thought you were coming out of church... #imjustsayin


Thought the same damn thing.
 
Yo OP how you gonna look like Della Bea coming home from choir practice? You time traveling?
 
You guys are such haters. That's not the only picture I have on this site. I just don't have that many non-facial shots.
 
Originally Posted by SShanique

You guys are such haters. That's not the only picture I have on this site. I just don't have that many non-facial shots.

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This is NT, it's what we do.
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