Update p. 14 Does this guy have a right to complain? Vol. Help a sista out.

[kicktionair]

At first I would just talk to a girl because she is pleasing to the eye. It takes more than sex for me to develop deeper feelings about a woman.

A man will not have sex with a female because she is adorable and a woman's personality can be easily over looked. Girls like to develop emotional bondsfirst before they have sex with a man (not every girl of course) but men do not work that way...... If a woman is hard to break a guy will make things up inorder to smash.

If a girl is decent then of course men want to have sex with her...... will they marry her, highly unlikely

You seem to be very paranoid about this OP but thats just how things work. Sure there are exceptions to any rule but it is what it is. If a man talks to youand you have a feeling he wants to hit it.....then guess what? HE WANTS TO HIT.

A perfect example was that guy that wifed that latin chick, he lied to you but thats because he was trying to meet your emotional expectations in order for himto get in your pants.

All cases are different but asking questions and looking deep into things is not the way to go. Men don't give signals, if they want to have sex with youthen I am sure you KNOW but choose to ignore it because thats just not how things work ( but they kinda do)

but thats just me...... there are guys who keep it real and will tell you their true feelings but those are the guys that don't turn you on. Why? becausethey are how they are

 

[mangudai954]

Im pulling for you OP. Woman up and be more direct.

 

[swoboydehteezy]

Originally Posted by Dirtylicious

I do like him, though.

so stop playing games.

This.

 

[kicktionair]

Originally Posted by SWOBOYdeHTEEZY

Originally Posted by Dirtylicious

I do like him, though.

so stop playing games.

This.


basically

The more games the less and less of the true person comes out

 

[orangatrang]

DISREGARD MALES, ACQUIRE CURRENCY.

 

[frenchhustler19091]

All I hear is excuses and I know exactly your type...
...I would never want to go out with a mind playing, faking not knowing what she wants, selfish woman.

Dude obviously is showing signs... and you scared because you had a bad experience. So now you're restricting yourself from talking to anyone?
Good luck finding anyone with that type of mentality.

And the worse thing is that there are way too many females just like you.

I just feel bad for the dude. Some women make the world that much more complicated.

Grow up.

 

[blackmagnus514]

OP,

FYI, we all wanna sleep with females. I don't know what fantasy world these girls live in where they don't think a guy wouldn't wanna sleep withthem. If you didn't wanna sleep with him and there wasn't a relationship involved, there's no foul on his part in him bumping another chick to yourspot.

 

[atlien seeko]

SShanique wrote:

---

Dathbgboy wrote:

---

U gave off the vibe that u wasn't feelin him but u coulda at least said hi. I'm startin to wonder about u and what goes on in ur head miss
Do you not understand him dissing me first by not calling? I've only given my number out to 3 guys in my life: my ex, a gay boy I hoped wouldn't call, and now this guy. It was a big deal to me, and I waited for him to call. What am I supposed to be thinking?




You cannot be serious? If you're serious about that statement, this is part of your problem. You need experience. How old are you? If you're in your20's you better learn fast before you end up a bitter old Deliver Us From Eva "Successful Indipendent Black Woman" type figure. That's real.

SShanique wrote:

---

blackmagnus514 wrote:

---

this is why he's tapping anther female who's being straight forward.

pardon the bluntness...but i had a few drinks.
That's another thing that I think about. I see him every few weeks, and I don't know him outside of the workplace. He could very well be interested in another girl, so I wouldn't want to look dumb expressing my interest if he's into someone else. I must also add that we live in Whitesville, USA. There are enough white girls to go around, but he's interested in me, the black chick. Actually, the last time I saw him at his restaurant, he was surrounded by two white girls who were talking to him. Granted, they work for him, but I couldn't help but to be jealous. I started thinking if he has a number of white girls available to him, then why would he choose me? That also factored into my thinking of why he didn't call me. I'm not totally sure what's going on. I know I think he's the bomb, so I don't see why no one would have snatched him up already. I'm apprehensive about the whole situation.




Again, for the sake of your future, I hope that you're mad young (15-17yrs. old)... Your insecurities will get you nowhere. You need to put all that aside.If YOU'RE the one that's trying to get with him, you need to put the thought of any other female, regardless of race, out of psyche. It's you andhim. That insecurity issue will carry on to a relationship and will make it fail in the longrun, so you need to take care of that asap. And to be honest,it's not something you can fix in one day, you need time to get to know yourself and what you want before things can go smooth with anyone outside ofyourself. If you have to wonder if a guy going "WOOOOO!!" like Rick Flare (

) is an insult, or a compliment (could have been a joke?), thenyou definitely need to take some time to get to know yourself and you'll find out how you want people to treat you through that process. Imagine if youstarted dating him and he's at his job with two "white girls" discussing work related issues with him and you see it... Your insecurities willmake ruin that relationship... Fast. About that "white girl" thing... Again, when you find out who you are and know yourself well then you'll beproud of whatever color you are and what you have to offer and you'll learn that if people dont want what you have to offer then they're not worth yourtime...

So, first thing's first. Take care of yourself. You're not ready for a serious relationship. Maybe have him as a friend and you can talk to him andlearn a few things.

Good luck.

 

[tim teufel]

you will deff grow old by your lonesome.

 

[f3djam]

whats wrong with you op?
why are you acting so hard to read? the dude is feeling you, your feeling him, its not that hard!

 

[blackmagnus514]

OP,

I think the guys in here are saying some harsh, albeit real !#@. We've ALL come across women who didnt know what they wanted or were insecure and thisthread is bringing out a lotta emotions out of these guys in here.

You need to worry about you and WHY he should even bother talking to you. Acting like you dont like him and all that is for high school. Especially if he'sa business owner (if he's anything like what I think he is), he's not gonna want to waste time on a female who's gonna be wishy washy becauseit's a waste of time. Say ya'll do hang out and get to know each other and this !#@ keeps going on. He's gonna look at you like you're wastinghis time.

And if he's not in a relationship with you, dont worry about no other chicks. Men reserve the right to talk to and sleep with any female they want untilthey're committed. If you're not his girl or trying to be, it shouldnt matter.

 

[blackmagnus514]

checkmate

 

[kicktionair]

Originally Posted by Orangatrang

DISREGARD MALES, ACQUIRE CURRENCY.

Too bad men don't really care about currency like women do

so that dosn't really apply, unless chcik wants to be a sugar momma

 

[antonlavey]

Some guys don't respond well to playing hard to get. I would know because I'm one of those guys, a girl has to show interest through her words and bodylanguage for me to expend energy trying to court her.

Take the L, be more aggressive next time.

 

[al audi]

Originally Posted by AntonLaVey

Some guys don't respond well to playing hard to get. I would know because I'm one of those guys, a girl has to show interest through her words and body language for me to expend energy trying to court her.

Take the L, be more aggressive next time.

true words

 

[Deleted member 38307]

Originally Posted by Dirtylicious

I do like him, though.

so stop playing games.

he asked if I wanted to go out. I said, "Maybe."

This.

 

[senatorjeffsmith]

OP, time to make a move.

He owns a restaurant so chances are his thoughts are on his business 90% of the time. It's not selfish it's more of how do I make ends meet, dailyoperations, I need to make some dough, etc. Most business owners will say there work is always on their mind.

You've played hard to get and sent mixed signals but it's something you can quickly correct. How about greeting him with a smile, a hello and pat onthe arm?

Good luck.

 

[food4thgt]

So are we getting pics or not????

I can tell you right now the answer to your question if you just provide pics... REAL TALK ..NT just wants to help..

 

[htownhooper31]

Originally Posted by SShanique

RamZs8906 wrote:

---

SShanique wrote:

---

SShanique wrote:

---

blackmagnus514 wrote:

---

this is why he's tapping anther female who's being straight forward.

pardon the bluntness...but i had a few drinks.

That's another thing that I think about. I see him every few weeks, and I don't know him outside of the workplace. He could very well be interested in another girl, so I wouldn't want to look dumb expressing my interest if he's into someone else. I must also add that we live in Whitesville, USA. There are enough white girls to go around, but he's interested in me, the black chick. Actually, the last time I saw him at his restaurant, he was surrounded by two white girls who were talking to him. Granted, they work for him, but I couldn't help but to be jealous. I didn't even respond to his flirting, because I was uncomfortable in the situation. I started thinking if he has a number of white girls available to him, then why would he choose me? That also factored into my thinking of why he didn't call me. I'm not totally sure what's going on. I know I think he's the bomb, so I don't see why no one would have snatched him up already. I'm apprehensive about the whole situation.





This is the problem with too many females nowadays. Its 2010, bout time ya'll acted like it regarding EVERYTHING. You want to be treated as equals, yet don't want to approach a guy and be straight up with them from the beginning and play stupid hard to get games like you're still in middle school. Here's an idea OP. Instead of coming to a forum to ask the advice of a bunch of people who: 1. Don't know you or the guy personally 2. Most of the people aren't mature enough to comment on the subject, and 3. (at least on #NT) are more concerned with smashing than building an actual relationship how about you TALK TO HIM. There is no handbook in learning how to get to know or deal with another person, don't go to a message board to try and decipher what's going on, go to the person and learn directly from the source. It's not that difficult.

Good approach, but I talked to the last guy I was kind of interested in. He was lying his butt off, and it turns out that he was just trying to get me to sleep with him. I asked a question about him on a message board, and the guys told me that he wanted to sleep with me. But I was like nooooooo, this guy has liked me for so long, like he said. He put my picture as the screensaver on his computer. He put me on his Top Friends list on myspace. He wrote a rap song about me. Yada, yada, yada. Turns out, he just wanted to sleep with me, and as soon as I wouldn't he did a 180 and "wifed" a fat Latin chick with 3 kids.

She went from nowhere on his top friends list to #3, way above me. It wasn't because I wouldn't sleep with him, because even if I had he would have been with me one night and then asked that girl to be his girlfriend the next. I know not everybody's like that, but I try to be cautious because I don't ever want to be in a situation like that again.


Sounds like he went through alot of trouble. You should have slept with him.

 

[atlien seeko]

Originally Posted by SenatorJeffSmith

You've played hard to get and sent mixed signals but it's something you can quickly correct. How about greeting him with a smile, a hello and pat on the arm?

Good luck.

 

[senatorjeffsmith]

Originally Posted by ATLien Seeko

Originally Posted by SenatorJeffSmith

You've played hard to get and sent mixed signals but it's something you can quickly correct. How about greeting him with a smile, a hello and pat on the arm?

Good luck.

It's more of her talking to him and making somephysical contact. Some women do this when they greet a guy they like--- they'll touch him on the arm or make some contact.

 

[sighfur]

stop over-thinking how you should act around this guy you "like" and just be real, show your real face, not some front. Its so corny when chicks tryand act like they don't want to seem "eager" ...if you like dude, then act like you like him. Im not saying throw your self at him, just beyourself, without all the gimmicks. Trust me, it will also help YOU in the long run, because then a dude who you genuinely like, who also likes you back, willknow who you really are from the jump.

 

[deletedelete]

... no social skills

that's cute i guess

 

[atlien seeko]

Originally Posted by SiMPLYDiMPLY

... no social skills

that's cute i guess

It actually could be. That's the type of chick I would take under my wing and "boss" her around a bit. Not taking advantage, but you know..."Show her the ropes" so to speak. Prolly a submissive type...

 

[blackmagnus514]

they all are "submissive" if you know how to press the right buttons.

"A chick is a chick, a nut is a nut/and they always keep an attitude till you butter em up"

Recently, I've been learning that despite all this Xena Warrior Princess ##* they exhibit..they're still women who need to be understood. I'mtalking armchair psychologist status...then you can break it down from there.