There are NO benefits for men to get married.

[still1rise]

Originally Posted by VeryAnalytical85

Granted I too like to believe in the 'ol "I'll find love when the time is right" cliche type of deal.
But let's face it, not everyone is that fortunate to find someone.

With that said, we all have our varying backgrounds and beliefs as to why we believe in such a thing. For all you married people, of course you're gonna be more inclined to say, "@#% you talk about B? You bugging with that nonsense."

While those of us who have yet to find someone worthwhile or don't prefer to follow social norms do to personal experience. Is this so hard to understand?

  

 

[still1rise]

Originally Posted by VeryAnalytical85

Granted I too like to believe in the 'ol "I'll find love when the time is right" cliche type of deal.
But let's face it, not everyone is that fortunate to find someone.

With that said, we all have our varying backgrounds and beliefs as to why we believe in such a thing. For all you married people, of course you're gonna be more inclined to say, "@#% you talk about B? You bugging with that nonsense."

While those of us who have yet to find someone worthwhile or don't prefer to follow social norms do to personal experience. Is this so hard to understand?

  

 

[ldj]

Originally Posted by Still1Rise

Originally Posted by VeryAnalytical85

Granted I too like to believe in the 'ol "I'll find love when the time is right" cliche type of deal.
But let's face it, not everyone is that fortunate to find someone.

With that said, we all have our varying backgrounds and beliefs as to why we believe in such a thing. For all you married people, of course you're gonna be more inclined to say, "@#% you talk about B? You bugging with that nonsense."

While those of us who have yet to find someone worthwhile or don't prefer to follow social norms do to personal experience. Is this so hard to understand?

i


  

Not only this but lets use the old common sense factor. The ratio of men/women arent even equal so it isnt even logical to think that way. And again like I said so homosexuals should just off themselves.

  

 

[ldj]

Originally Posted by Still1Rise

Originally Posted by VeryAnalytical85

Granted I too like to believe in the 'ol "I'll find love when the time is right" cliche type of deal.
But let's face it, not everyone is that fortunate to find someone.

With that said, we all have our varying backgrounds and beliefs as to why we believe in such a thing. For all you married people, of course you're gonna be more inclined to say, "@#% you talk about B? You bugging with that nonsense."

While those of us who have yet to find someone worthwhile or don't prefer to follow social norms do to personal experience. Is this so hard to understand?

i


  

Not only this but lets use the old common sense factor. The ratio of men/women arent even equal so it isnt even logical to think that way. And again like I said so homosexuals should just off themselves.

  

 

[still1rise]

Originally Posted by PleasurePhD

Already discussed this a while back in a different thread.

I disagree with that statement in so many ways.

I feel like there are many reasons to get married as a man. For one thing I couldn't call myself a true man without committing myself to raising and protecting a family. What is the purpose of life if you don't have another person you love and who loves you back so much that they depend on you and need you in their lives? Someone you know will always be there for you because you are married, and will make all your accomplishments and experience that much more satisfying because you can share them with someone who truly knows you and actually cares. Yes, its good to have other goals and aspirations, but the satisfaction of knowing that your life has so much more meaning because someone that is not blood related to you holds your life to that high of a regard. For those that argue you can have this without being married, well you can, but there are benefits to being married, legal and if you believe in TRUE marriage, personal. Yes, its just a title, but a title can mean a lot and you feel bound to this individual, closer, more protective over this person because of your title.

You say you can have kids without being married? Really, you're going to do that to them? So many peoples coming out effed up blaming it on not having a stable family, divorced parents or just parents who were never married. Shuffling the kids back and forth etc... Daughter gonna be on that pole man. You can raise a family and live with the mother as well too, but again there are benefits to being married, and raising a family.

And for you selfish types, who the eff is gonna be there for you when you're hurt and/or old? Your parents will be dead the rest of your family will be busy with their kids and marriages and personal problems, you will be left in a nursing home rotting until you die. I for one know my wife will be there by the side of my death bed comforting me and telling me how my existence has brought her life so much joy, and a purpose. I know this because God forbid she be the one on the death bed I will do the same for her.

There are other reasons too, but its late, I'm tired and going to bed. Hope some of you can understand where I'm coming from.

So a true man needs to have a family and be married.

 I think real men see the world for what it is and try not to live a fairy tale. 

 

[still1rise]

Originally Posted by PleasurePhD

Already discussed this a while back in a different thread.

I disagree with that statement in so many ways.

I feel like there are many reasons to get married as a man. For one thing I couldn't call myself a true man without committing myself to raising and protecting a family. What is the purpose of life if you don't have another person you love and who loves you back so much that they depend on you and need you in their lives? Someone you know will always be there for you because you are married, and will make all your accomplishments and experience that much more satisfying because you can share them with someone who truly knows you and actually cares. Yes, its good to have other goals and aspirations, but the satisfaction of knowing that your life has so much more meaning because someone that is not blood related to you holds your life to that high of a regard. For those that argue you can have this without being married, well you can, but there are benefits to being married, legal and if you believe in TRUE marriage, personal. Yes, its just a title, but a title can mean a lot and you feel bound to this individual, closer, more protective over this person because of your title.

You say you can have kids without being married? Really, you're going to do that to them? So many peoples coming out effed up blaming it on not having a stable family, divorced parents or just parents who were never married. Shuffling the kids back and forth etc... Daughter gonna be on that pole man. You can raise a family and live with the mother as well too, but again there are benefits to being married, and raising a family.

And for you selfish types, who the eff is gonna be there for you when you're hurt and/or old? Your parents will be dead the rest of your family will be busy with their kids and marriages and personal problems, you will be left in a nursing home rotting until you die. I for one know my wife will be there by the side of my death bed comforting me and telling me how my existence has brought her life so much joy, and a purpose. I know this because God forbid she be the one on the death bed I will do the same for her.

There are other reasons too, but its late, I'm tired and going to bed. Hope some of you can understand where I'm coming from.

So a true man needs to have a family and be married.

 I think real men see the world for what it is and try not to live a fairy tale. 

 

[pleasurephd]

Originally Posted by LDJ

PleasurePhD wrote:

---

So I guess your saying before the indoctrine of the euro-centric version of marriage men werent men, and the family structure wasnt intact? Funny you say that because ppl had a stronger bond and life was better actually then than it is of now. Lol so life isnt worth living unless you get married have kids and get the thumbs up etc... from the govt? So by your logic all single ppl, and homosexuals should just off themselves seeing they cant/dont have the typical euro-centric version of what life is about?

Before I had kids/had a family I loved life and enjoyed life. I didnt feel less of a person then or now. I enjoyed both the wild and crazy party life, same as I love the family life. This isnt a all of nothing type of things, Why cant you love and enjoy both equally but for different reasons. And this whle age thing is irrelevant. Being 40+ doesnt make you anymore ready for a family/kids then a person thats 25. Only aspect that would matter and make a difference is again money. 

Again the only benefit of being married is from a fiscal standpoint, and a status standpoint. And if your doing ok in life then that lil money you get from the govt isnt much of nothing. And if your getting married for status or validation from the outside world then iuno what to say.
  

Really? How can you compare the two if there was no definition or term or title for marriage as we know? Its like saying men were not men back in the day when there was no term for man. $%$ kinda logic. Those individuals being together, raising a family, and having a stronger bond were basically married, but anyways, that bond is what I'm talking about. As you can see in my post I don't really talk about marriage, but the bond. I say you can't really compare the two because in our society today we do value marriage as a defined term which describes a particular type of couple. I'm not demasculinating those who are single or homosexual. WOW buddy. I consistently said I understand those of you who want to have a family and long lasting relationship with someone, but do not want to get married. All I add to that is basically a why not? Especially since there are benefits.

Things were better back in the day when there was no term for marriage as we know? I'm sorry I thought life had progressed into a much better, safer, and advanced world. Thought that equality between sexes was better then back in the day club your woman in the head if she disobeys. Guess you proved me wrong.

Basically buddy your guess was wrong, completely wrong. I am merely stating my opinion on why I value marriage as a man. Just because you are single or homosexual doesn't mean you don't want too get married or value it. So why would I assume they should off themselves? Did I not say there are plenty of other goals and aspirations in life? One doesn't need to be married to be a man in my eyes. But, one should respect the opinion of another man who does value marriage. Heck I know plenty of guys who I would call real men that are not married. The difference is they respect the value of marriage and aren't trying to bash it or bash other guys who value it. Even if marriage is just not for you and you have other goals in life I would still consider you a real man if you pursued those goals as well as just respected others including men who value marriage. These men aren't who I would consider not to be men. The guys that don't care to understand, and even spit, on the bond (not marriage) but  the bond between a couple and family are the ones who I would question about being true men, only because I personally see that bond as giving a purpose.

I do respect both which is why I was stating I understand the other side of the opinion. You assumed I didn't. Again, I was stating my opinion on what makes me feel like a true man and give my life purpose. I understand lot of men won't even get the change to marry, but again like I said that doesn't make them less of a man so long as they just respect others that do want to and can understand why they would want too. I have to disagree with you on that age thing too I am only 24 at the moment and I can easily say I am much more grown then when I was even 21. I'm not gonna say mature because I feel like I was mature back then too, but I feel much more experienced and wise now, I could only imagine myself at 40. I would def be much better preped for kids at 40 compared to now, and even now compared to 21. Even if I had millions at all ages.

As for your last statement. The money is a plus, but again imo there are many other benefits cause I value marriage, the title and its meaning, I can give a rat's butt what anyone else thinks, but I do want them to know I am married to my specific wife, not for the validation, but because I am proud of it and I want them to respect it. Marriage is between two individuals who love each other, and that holds the highest value/meaning. The outside world doesn't matter, only what the couple knows and thinks.

 

[pleasurephd]

Originally Posted by LDJ

PleasurePhD wrote:

---

So I guess your saying before the indoctrine of the euro-centric version of marriage men werent men, and the family structure wasnt intact? Funny you say that because ppl had a stronger bond and life was better actually then than it is of now. Lol so life isnt worth living unless you get married have kids and get the thumbs up etc... from the govt? So by your logic all single ppl, and homosexuals should just off themselves seeing they cant/dont have the typical euro-centric version of what life is about?

Before I had kids/had a family I loved life and enjoyed life. I didnt feel less of a person then or now. I enjoyed both the wild and crazy party life, same as I love the family life. This isnt a all of nothing type of things, Why cant you love and enjoy both equally but for different reasons. And this whle age thing is irrelevant. Being 40+ doesnt make you anymore ready for a family/kids then a person thats 25. Only aspect that would matter and make a difference is again money. 

Again the only benefit of being married is from a fiscal standpoint, and a status standpoint. And if your doing ok in life then that lil money you get from the govt isnt much of nothing. And if your getting married for status or validation from the outside world then iuno what to say.
  

Really? How can you compare the two if there was no definition or term or title for marriage as we know? Its like saying men were not men back in the day when there was no term for man. $%$ kinda logic. Those individuals being together, raising a family, and having a stronger bond were basically married, but anyways, that bond is what I'm talking about. As you can see in my post I don't really talk about marriage, but the bond. I say you can't really compare the two because in our society today we do value marriage as a defined term which describes a particular type of couple. I'm not demasculinating those who are single or homosexual. WOW buddy. I consistently said I understand those of you who want to have a family and long lasting relationship with someone, but do not want to get married. All I add to that is basically a why not? Especially since there are benefits.

Things were better back in the day when there was no term for marriage as we know? I'm sorry I thought life had progressed into a much better, safer, and advanced world. Thought that equality between sexes was better then back in the day club your woman in the head if she disobeys. Guess you proved me wrong.

Basically buddy your guess was wrong, completely wrong. I am merely stating my opinion on why I value marriage as a man. Just because you are single or homosexual doesn't mean you don't want too get married or value it. So why would I assume they should off themselves? Did I not say there are plenty of other goals and aspirations in life? One doesn't need to be married to be a man in my eyes. But, one should respect the opinion of another man who does value marriage. Heck I know plenty of guys who I would call real men that are not married. The difference is they respect the value of marriage and aren't trying to bash it or bash other guys who value it. Even if marriage is just not for you and you have other goals in life I would still consider you a real man if you pursued those goals as well as just respected others including men who value marriage. These men aren't who I would consider not to be men. The guys that don't care to understand, and even spit, on the bond (not marriage) but  the bond between a couple and family are the ones who I would question about being true men, only because I personally see that bond as giving a purpose.

I do respect both which is why I was stating I understand the other side of the opinion. You assumed I didn't. Again, I was stating my opinion on what makes me feel like a true man and give my life purpose. I understand lot of men won't even get the change to marry, but again like I said that doesn't make them less of a man so long as they just respect others that do want to and can understand why they would want too. I have to disagree with you on that age thing too I am only 24 at the moment and I can easily say I am much more grown then when I was even 21. I'm not gonna say mature because I feel like I was mature back then too, but I feel much more experienced and wise now, I could only imagine myself at 40. I would def be much better preped for kids at 40 compared to now, and even now compared to 21. Even if I had millions at all ages.

As for your last statement. The money is a plus, but again imo there are many other benefits cause I value marriage, the title and its meaning, I can give a rat's butt what anyone else thinks, but I do want them to know I am married to my specific wife, not for the validation, but because I am proud of it and I want them to respect it. Marriage is between two individuals who love each other, and that holds the highest value/meaning. The outside world doesn't matter, only what the couple knows and thinks.

 

[ghenges]

Originally Posted by Hendrix Watermelon

Originally Posted by Ghenges

When you meet that girl you will understand the benefits.


Of course, the belief that there are no benefits to marriage is probably an opinion held by those not worthy enough to pull 'marriage material' females.

Brag Swag post in disguise. ?

FTFY.

 

[ghenges]

Originally Posted by Hendrix Watermelon

Originally Posted by Ghenges

When you meet that girl you will understand the benefits.


Of course, the belief that there are no benefits to marriage is probably an opinion held by those not worthy enough to pull 'marriage material' females.

Brag Swag post in disguise. ?

FTFY.

 

[pleasurephd]

Originally Posted by Still1Rise

Originally Posted by PleasurePhD

Already discussed this a while back in a different thread.

I disagree with that statement in so many ways.

I feel like there are many reasons to get married as a man. For one thing I couldn't call myself a true man without committing myself to raising and protecting a family. What is the purpose of life if you don't have another person you love and who loves you back so much that they depend on you and need you in their lives? Someone you know will always be there for you because you are married, and will make all your accomplishments and experience that much more satisfying because you can share them with someone who truly knows you and actually cares. Yes, its good to have other goals and aspirations, but the satisfaction of knowing that your life has so much more meaning because someone that is not blood related to you holds your life to that high of a regard. For those that argue you can have this without being married, well you can, but there are benefits to being married, legal and if you believe in TRUE marriage, personal. Yes, its just a title, but a title can mean a lot and you feel bound to this individual, closer, more protective over this person because of your title.

You say you can have kids without being married? Really, you're going to do that to them? So many peoples coming out effed up blaming it on not having a stable family, divorced parents or just parents who were never married. Shuffling the kids back and forth etc... Daughter gonna be on that pole man. You can raise a family and live with the mother as well too, but again there are benefits to being married, and raising a family.

And for you selfish types, who the eff is gonna be there for you when you're hurt and/or old? Your parents will be dead the rest of your family will be busy with their kids and marriages and personal problems, you will be left in a nursing home rotting until you die. I for one know my wife will be there by the side of my death bed comforting me and telling me how my existence has brought her life so much joy, and a purpose. I know this because God forbid she be the one on the death bed I will do the same for her.

There are other reasons too, but its late, I'm tired and going to bed. Hope some of you can understand where I'm coming from.

So a true man needs to have a family and be married.

 I think real men see the world for what it is and try not to live a fairy tale. 

Quit pulling text from people's posts out of context to try and prove something. Why don't you actually try and comment on the post's content if you believe that you disagree with things being said. Can you find comments that refute my opinion or at least say I understand your opinion, but I disagree?

Yes, I did say, "Its just a title" but at least I can say that. By saying that I am trying to show individuals like you that I understand your point of view. I am not closed minded, only thinking my opinion is right.

I'm trying to show my understanding of your opinion and acknowledge it, while saying I disagree and here is why... I'm not blabbing out one pov and then posting comments after just saying I'm right, you're wrong, I'm right, you're wrong, like some of us.

Read my last post to LDJ I discuss the true man comment.  If you're too lazy too then basically no I don't think a true man needs to have a family and be married. I understand that a lot won't.

And, I agree with you real men do see the world for what is it and try not to live a fairy tale. I certainly am not trying to live a fake fairy tale. I see the world for what it is, and because I see how the world is I value my marriage, I respect the title and the bond I have with my wife. Since it's just a title I feel even more connected with my wife; it's not marriage or a fake fairy tale love that is keeping us together and strong, its us, we are putting in the work to keep that, title. I feel that although I have many goals and aspirations, my main purpose in life is to raise and protect a family with my lovely wife.

Goodnight.

 

[pleasurephd]

Originally Posted by Still1Rise

Originally Posted by PleasurePhD

Already discussed this a while back in a different thread.

I disagree with that statement in so many ways.

I feel like there are many reasons to get married as a man. For one thing I couldn't call myself a true man without committing myself to raising and protecting a family. What is the purpose of life if you don't have another person you love and who loves you back so much that they depend on you and need you in their lives? Someone you know will always be there for you because you are married, and will make all your accomplishments and experience that much more satisfying because you can share them with someone who truly knows you and actually cares. Yes, its good to have other goals and aspirations, but the satisfaction of knowing that your life has so much more meaning because someone that is not blood related to you holds your life to that high of a regard. For those that argue you can have this without being married, well you can, but there are benefits to being married, legal and if you believe in TRUE marriage, personal. Yes, its just a title, but a title can mean a lot and you feel bound to this individual, closer, more protective over this person because of your title.

You say you can have kids without being married? Really, you're going to do that to them? So many peoples coming out effed up blaming it on not having a stable family, divorced parents or just parents who were never married. Shuffling the kids back and forth etc... Daughter gonna be on that pole man. You can raise a family and live with the mother as well too, but again there are benefits to being married, and raising a family.

And for you selfish types, who the eff is gonna be there for you when you're hurt and/or old? Your parents will be dead the rest of your family will be busy with their kids and marriages and personal problems, you will be left in a nursing home rotting until you die. I for one know my wife will be there by the side of my death bed comforting me and telling me how my existence has brought her life so much joy, and a purpose. I know this because God forbid she be the one on the death bed I will do the same for her.

There are other reasons too, but its late, I'm tired and going to bed. Hope some of you can understand where I'm coming from.

So a true man needs to have a family and be married.

 I think real men see the world for what it is and try not to live a fairy tale. 

Quit pulling text from people's posts out of context to try and prove something. Why don't you actually try and comment on the post's content if you believe that you disagree with things being said. Can you find comments that refute my opinion or at least say I understand your opinion, but I disagree?

Yes, I did say, "Its just a title" but at least I can say that. By saying that I am trying to show individuals like you that I understand your point of view. I am not closed minded, only thinking my opinion is right.

I'm trying to show my understanding of your opinion and acknowledge it, while saying I disagree and here is why... I'm not blabbing out one pov and then posting comments after just saying I'm right, you're wrong, I'm right, you're wrong, like some of us.

Read my last post to LDJ I discuss the true man comment.  If you're too lazy too then basically no I don't think a true man needs to have a family and be married. I understand that a lot won't.

And, I agree with you real men do see the world for what is it and try not to live a fairy tale. I certainly am not trying to live a fake fairy tale. I see the world for what it is, and because I see how the world is I value my marriage, I respect the title and the bond I have with my wife. Since it's just a title I feel even more connected with my wife; it's not marriage or a fake fairy tale love that is keeping us together and strong, its us, we are putting in the work to keep that, title. I feel that although I have many goals and aspirations, my main purpose in life is to raise and protect a family with my lovely wife.

Goodnight.

 

[blackmagnus514]

Originally Posted by Still1Rise

Originally Posted by Al Audi

you might meet someone who will change your view on that opinion one day OP.

Women are depreciating asssets. Why buy when you can lease.

lol. well damn.
  

 

[blackmagnus514]

Originally Posted by Still1Rise

Originally Posted by Al Audi

you might meet someone who will change your view on that opinion one day OP.

Women are depreciating asssets. Why buy when you can lease.

lol. well damn.
  

 

[ldj]

Originally Posted by PleasurePhD

Originally Posted by LDJ

PleasurePhD wrote:

---

So I guess your saying before the indoctrine of the euro-centric version of marriage men werent men, and the family structure wasnt intact? Funny you say that because ppl had a stronger bond and life was better actually then than it is of now. Lol so life isnt worth living unless you get married have kids and get the thumbs up etc... from the govt? So by your logic all single ppl, and homosexuals should just off themselves seeing they cant/dont have the typical euro-centric version of what life is about?

Before I had kids/had a family I loved life and enjoyed life. I didnt feel less of a person then or now. I enjoyed both the wild and crazy party life, same as I love the family life. This isnt a all of nothing type of things, Why cant you love and enjoy both equally but for different reasons. And this whle age thing is irrelevant. Being 40+ doesnt make you anymore ready for a family/kids then a person thats 25. Only aspect that would matter and make a difference is again money. 

Again the only benefit of being married is from a fiscal standpoint, and a status standpoint. And if your doing ok in life then that lil money you get from the govt isnt much of nothing. And if your getting married for status or validation from the outside world then iuno what to say.
  

Really? How can you compare the two if there was no definition or term or title for marriage as we know? Its like saying men were not men back in the day when there was no term for man. $%$ kinda logic. Those individuals being together, raising a family, and having a stronger bond were basically married, but anyways, that bond is what I'm talking about. As you can see in my post I don't really talk about marriage, but the bond. I say you can't really compare the two because in our society today we do value marriage as a defined term which describes a particular type of couple. I'm not demasculinating those who are single or homosexual. WOW buddy. I consistently said I understand those of you who want to have a family and long lasting relationship with someone, but do not want to get married. All I add to that is basically a why not? Especially since there are benefits.

Things were better back in the day when there was no term for marriage as we know? I'm sorry I thought life had progressed into a much better, safer, and advanced world. Thought that equality between sexes was better then back in the day club your woman in the head if she disobeys. Guess you proved me wrong.

Basically buddy your guess was wrong, completely wrong. I am merely stating my opinion on why I value marriage as a man. Just because you are single or homosexual doesn't mean you don't want too get married or value it. So why would I assume they should off themselves? Did I not say there are plenty of other goals and aspirations in life? One doesn't need to be married to be a man in my eyes. But, one should respect the opinion of another man who does value marriage. Heck I know plenty of guys who I would call real men that are not married. The difference is they respect the value of marriage and aren't trying to bash it or bash other guys who value it. Even if marriage is just not for you and you have other goals in life I would still consider you a real man if you pursued those goals as well as just respected others including men who value marriage. These men aren't who I would consider not to be men. The guys that don't care to understand, and even spit, on the bond (not marriage) but  the bond between a couple and family are the ones who I would question about being true men, only because I personally see that bond as giving a purpose.

I do respect both which is why I was stating I understand the other side of the opinion. You assumed I didn't. Again, I was stating my opinion on what makes me feel like a true man and give my life purpose. I understand lot of men won't even get the change to marry, but again like I said that doesn't make them less of a man so long as they just respect others that do want to and can understand why they would want too. I have to disagree with you on that age thing too I am only 24 at the moment and I can easily say I am much more grown then when I was even 21. I'm not gonna say mature because I feel like I was mature back then too, but I feel much more experienced and wise now, I could only imagine myself at 40. I would def be much better preped for kids at 40 compared to now, and even now compared to 21. Even if I had millions at all ages.

As for your last statement. The money is a plus, but again imo there are many other benefits cause I value marriage, the title and its meaning, I can give a rat's butt what anyone else thinks, but I do want them to know I am married to my specific wife, not for the validation, but because I am proud of it and I want them to respect it. Marriage is between two individuals who love each other, and that holds the highest value/meaning. The outside world doesn't matter, only what the couple knows and thinks.



True but you did kinda imply it by saying having a family kids etc marriage and love is essentially the purpose of life. And since homosexuals/single ppl wont/cant have that then that kinda leads one to believe that what you were stating. It was an open-ended statement. But I get what you are saying in a sense. And age really isnt a factor, its the time/life experiences that happened within that time that makes the difference. If you are sheltered 50 yrs old wouldnt make you more prepared for family/marriage vs someone 23 who has a plethora of life experiences. Just growing old doesnt make person a more maturated then person b. i as well as you probably know ppl who are younger and are more mature/ can deal with life better then someone 30 something 40 am I not right.

I say this because I read ppl twits sp.. facebooks and I see ppl who are less mature etc and they are like late 30's 40's and I see ppl who are young 20's who have there !+! together more then they do.

And what about the old tradition of marriage when men had many wives? Are you saying they werent real men, had a true bon with there wives? So I guess before life in america, marriage wasnt real and the bond unification was false. But that kinda contridicts itself seeing as the family structure has worsen as time has progress.

I mean with marriage its such a touchy thing, cause some ppl do it for love, which is kinda funny seeing as a ceremony/paper isnt a determining factor on your feelings or bond between two ppl. Then you have ppl who marry for the materialistic/status aspect of it. Then you have ppl who marry for the whole validation reasons.

I guess why the past 15 yrs I never married my old lady is because Im not materialistic or care about my status in society, i dont seek validity from anyone esp considering ( wont get into that, whole entirely different subject) And I realize I love her and she loves me and we love our kids, and I dont see how a tuxedo, a dress, a piece of paper etc... ceremony will change this.

Again I dont knock ppl who do it but i just dont see how ok one day i sorta loved maybe cared about this person, then all of a sudden i put on this ring, sign this paper and like magic love became strong, our family is good, we are bonded for life. I just fail to see how wordly things can change the factors of something emotionally.

Whether you admit it or realize it or not you got married for one of the reasons I mentioned. I cant see how ok you felt a certain way about your sig. other, then all of this changed enhanced from the time you went from the end of the eisle to the front of the eisle. Or how sliding a ring on a finger transformed the feelings/bond you two had right before you placed the rings on.

 

[ldj]

Originally Posted by PleasurePhD

Originally Posted by LDJ

PleasurePhD wrote:

---

So I guess your saying before the indoctrine of the euro-centric version of marriage men werent men, and the family structure wasnt intact? Funny you say that because ppl had a stronger bond and life was better actually then than it is of now. Lol so life isnt worth living unless you get married have kids and get the thumbs up etc... from the govt? So by your logic all single ppl, and homosexuals should just off themselves seeing they cant/dont have the typical euro-centric version of what life is about?

Before I had kids/had a family I loved life and enjoyed life. I didnt feel less of a person then or now. I enjoyed both the wild and crazy party life, same as I love the family life. This isnt a all of nothing type of things, Why cant you love and enjoy both equally but for different reasons. And this whle age thing is irrelevant. Being 40+ doesnt make you anymore ready for a family/kids then a person thats 25. Only aspect that would matter and make a difference is again money. 

Again the only benefit of being married is from a fiscal standpoint, and a status standpoint. And if your doing ok in life then that lil money you get from the govt isnt much of nothing. And if your getting married for status or validation from the outside world then iuno what to say.
  

Really? How can you compare the two if there was no definition or term or title for marriage as we know? Its like saying men were not men back in the day when there was no term for man. $%$ kinda logic. Those individuals being together, raising a family, and having a stronger bond were basically married, but anyways, that bond is what I'm talking about. As you can see in my post I don't really talk about marriage, but the bond. I say you can't really compare the two because in our society today we do value marriage as a defined term which describes a particular type of couple. I'm not demasculinating those who are single or homosexual. WOW buddy. I consistently said I understand those of you who want to have a family and long lasting relationship with someone, but do not want to get married. All I add to that is basically a why not? Especially since there are benefits.

Things were better back in the day when there was no term for marriage as we know? I'm sorry I thought life had progressed into a much better, safer, and advanced world. Thought that equality between sexes was better then back in the day club your woman in the head if she disobeys. Guess you proved me wrong.

Basically buddy your guess was wrong, completely wrong. I am merely stating my opinion on why I value marriage as a man. Just because you are single or homosexual doesn't mean you don't want too get married or value it. So why would I assume they should off themselves? Did I not say there are plenty of other goals and aspirations in life? One doesn't need to be married to be a man in my eyes. But, one should respect the opinion of another man who does value marriage. Heck I know plenty of guys who I would call real men that are not married. The difference is they respect the value of marriage and aren't trying to bash it or bash other guys who value it. Even if marriage is just not for you and you have other goals in life I would still consider you a real man if you pursued those goals as well as just respected others including men who value marriage. These men aren't who I would consider not to be men. The guys that don't care to understand, and even spit, on the bond (not marriage) but  the bond between a couple and family are the ones who I would question about being true men, only because I personally see that bond as giving a purpose.

I do respect both which is why I was stating I understand the other side of the opinion. You assumed I didn't. Again, I was stating my opinion on what makes me feel like a true man and give my life purpose. I understand lot of men won't even get the change to marry, but again like I said that doesn't make them less of a man so long as they just respect others that do want to and can understand why they would want too. I have to disagree with you on that age thing too I am only 24 at the moment and I can easily say I am much more grown then when I was even 21. I'm not gonna say mature because I feel like I was mature back then too, but I feel much more experienced and wise now, I could only imagine myself at 40. I would def be much better preped for kids at 40 compared to now, and even now compared to 21. Even if I had millions at all ages.

As for your last statement. The money is a plus, but again imo there are many other benefits cause I value marriage, the title and its meaning, I can give a rat's butt what anyone else thinks, but I do want them to know I am married to my specific wife, not for the validation, but because I am proud of it and I want them to respect it. Marriage is between two individuals who love each other, and that holds the highest value/meaning. The outside world doesn't matter, only what the couple knows and thinks.



True but you did kinda imply it by saying having a family kids etc marriage and love is essentially the purpose of life. And since homosexuals/single ppl wont/cant have that then that kinda leads one to believe that what you were stating. It was an open-ended statement. But I get what you are saying in a sense. And age really isnt a factor, its the time/life experiences that happened within that time that makes the difference. If you are sheltered 50 yrs old wouldnt make you more prepared for family/marriage vs someone 23 who has a plethora of life experiences. Just growing old doesnt make person a more maturated then person b. i as well as you probably know ppl who are younger and are more mature/ can deal with life better then someone 30 something 40 am I not right.

I say this because I read ppl twits sp.. facebooks and I see ppl who are less mature etc and they are like late 30's 40's and I see ppl who are young 20's who have there !+! together more then they do.

And what about the old tradition of marriage when men had many wives? Are you saying they werent real men, had a true bon with there wives? So I guess before life in america, marriage wasnt real and the bond unification was false. But that kinda contridicts itself seeing as the family structure has worsen as time has progress.

I mean with marriage its such a touchy thing, cause some ppl do it for love, which is kinda funny seeing as a ceremony/paper isnt a determining factor on your feelings or bond between two ppl. Then you have ppl who marry for the materialistic/status aspect of it. Then you have ppl who marry for the whole validation reasons.

I guess why the past 15 yrs I never married my old lady is because Im not materialistic or care about my status in society, i dont seek validity from anyone esp considering ( wont get into that, whole entirely different subject) And I realize I love her and she loves me and we love our kids, and I dont see how a tuxedo, a dress, a piece of paper etc... ceremony will change this.

Again I dont knock ppl who do it but i just dont see how ok one day i sorta loved maybe cared about this person, then all of a sudden i put on this ring, sign this paper and like magic love became strong, our family is good, we are bonded for life. I just fail to see how wordly things can change the factors of something emotionally.

Whether you admit it or realize it or not you got married for one of the reasons I mentioned. I cant see how ok you felt a certain way about your sig. other, then all of this changed enhanced from the time you went from the end of the eisle to the front of the eisle. Or how sliding a ring on a finger transformed the feelings/bond you two had right before you placed the rings on.

 

[martianrefugee]

Originally Posted by TruthGetsBusy

Originally Posted by mondaynightraw

So your mother was leased?

She probably wasn't even that.  Ol' rental Enterprise joint. 
  

 

[martianrefugee]

Originally Posted by TruthGetsBusy

Originally Posted by mondaynightraw

So your mother was leased?

She probably wasn't even that.  Ol' rental Enterprise joint. 
  

 

[ldj]

Originally Posted by PleasurePhD

Originally Posted by Still1Rise

Originally Posted by PleasurePhD

Already discussed this a while back in a different thread.

I disagree with that statement in so many ways.

I feel like there are many reasons to get married as a man. For one thing I couldn't call myself a true man without committing myself to raising and protecting a family. What is the purpose of life if you don't have another person you love and who loves you back so much that they depend on you and need you in their lives? Someone you know will always be there for you because you are married, and will make all your accomplishments and experience that much more satisfying because you can share them with someone who truly knows you and actually cares. Yes, its good to have other goals and aspirations, but the satisfaction of knowing that your life has so much more meaning because someone that is not blood related to you holds your life to that high of a regard. For those that argue you can have this without being married, well you can, but there are benefits to being married, legal and if you believe in TRUE marriage, personal. Yes, its just a title, but a title can mean a lot and you feel bound to this individual, closer, more protective over this person because of your title.

You say you can have kids without being married? Really, you're going to do that to them? So many peoples coming out effed up blaming it on not having a stable family, divorced parents or just parents who were never married. Shuffling the kids back and forth etc... Daughter gonna be on that pole man. You can raise a family and live with the mother as well too, but again there are benefits to being married, and raising a family.

And for you selfish types, who the eff is gonna be there for you when you're hurt and/or old? Your parents will be dead the rest of your family will be busy with their kids and marriages and personal problems, you will be left in a nursing home rotting until you die. I for one know my wife will be there by the side of my death bed comforting me and telling me how my existence has brought her life so much joy, and a purpose. I know this because God forbid she be the one on the death bed I will do the same for her.

There are other reasons too, but its late, I'm tired and going to bed. Hope some of you can understand where I'm coming from.

So a true man needs to have a family and be married.

 I think real men see the world for what it is and try not to live a fairy tale. 

Quit pulling text from people's posts out of context to try and prove something. Why don't you actually try and comment on the post's content if you believe that you disagree with things being said. Can you find comments that refute my opinion or at least say I understand your opinion, but I disagree?

Yes, I did say, "Its just a title" but at least I can say that. By saying that I am trying to show individuals like you that I understand your point of view. I am not closed minded, only thinking my opinion is right.

I'm trying to show my understanding of your opinion and acknowledge it, while saying I disagree and here is why... I'm not blabbing out one pov and then posting comments after just saying I'm right, you're wrong, I'm right, you're wrong, like some of us.

Read my last post to LDJ I discuss the true man comment.  If you're too lazy too then basically no I don't think a true man needs to have a family and be married. I understand that a lot won't.

And, I agree with you real men do see the world for what is it and try not to live a fairy tale. I certainly am not trying to live a fake fairy tale. I see the world for what it is, and because I see how the world is I value my marriage, I respect the title and the bond I have with my wife. Since it's just a title I feel even more connected with my wife; it's not marriage or a fake fairy tale love that is keeping us together and strong, its us, we are putting in the work to keep that, title. I feel that although I have many goals and aspirations, my main purpose in life is to raise and protect a family with my lovely wife.

Goodnight.

But before you had the title how did you feel? How was yalls bond. Im just trying to see this defining moment and how a word transitioned your emotions and feeings. And if you not had that title would your love/bond feelings you have for your wife/kids would change? Before you had the title what was your feelings? Its comming across like your giving tangible and living atributes to word, something that is intangible and does not have living attributes. And if its not about status and simply just to have a label brand/title a definition for what you have for society then what is it then? You openly said you can have all those things without the title, so what is the reasoning for the title if not for validity/ social norms and the label? In your eyes. Im not trying to put words in your mouth.

Bad example here but its early and this is the best I can come up with in the we early of the hours. If two ppl are experts on working on cars, both are proficient/skilled at what they do, but one calls himself a mechanic and has all his titles/accolades etc posted up in the shop and the other person doesnt. Is the guy who label himself, post his accolades anymore skilled then the other person? And if not to be labeled and seek acceptance, acknowledgement from patrons etc what would be the reason for posting his titles accolades? 

  

 

[ldj]

Originally Posted by PleasurePhD

Originally Posted by Still1Rise

Originally Posted by PleasurePhD

Already discussed this a while back in a different thread.

I disagree with that statement in so many ways.

I feel like there are many reasons to get married as a man. For one thing I couldn't call myself a true man without committing myself to raising and protecting a family. What is the purpose of life if you don't have another person you love and who loves you back so much that they depend on you and need you in their lives? Someone you know will always be there for you because you are married, and will make all your accomplishments and experience that much more satisfying because you can share them with someone who truly knows you and actually cares. Yes, its good to have other goals and aspirations, but the satisfaction of knowing that your life has so much more meaning because someone that is not blood related to you holds your life to that high of a regard. For those that argue you can have this without being married, well you can, but there are benefits to being married, legal and if you believe in TRUE marriage, personal. Yes, its just a title, but a title can mean a lot and you feel bound to this individual, closer, more protective over this person because of your title.

You say you can have kids without being married? Really, you're going to do that to them? So many peoples coming out effed up blaming it on not having a stable family, divorced parents or just parents who were never married. Shuffling the kids back and forth etc... Daughter gonna be on that pole man. You can raise a family and live with the mother as well too, but again there are benefits to being married, and raising a family.

And for you selfish types, who the eff is gonna be there for you when you're hurt and/or old? Your parents will be dead the rest of your family will be busy with their kids and marriages and personal problems, you will be left in a nursing home rotting until you die. I for one know my wife will be there by the side of my death bed comforting me and telling me how my existence has brought her life so much joy, and a purpose. I know this because God forbid she be the one on the death bed I will do the same for her.

There are other reasons too, but its late, I'm tired and going to bed. Hope some of you can understand where I'm coming from.

So a true man needs to have a family and be married.

 I think real men see the world for what it is and try not to live a fairy tale. 

Quit pulling text from people's posts out of context to try and prove something. Why don't you actually try and comment on the post's content if you believe that you disagree with things being said. Can you find comments that refute my opinion or at least say I understand your opinion, but I disagree?

Yes, I did say, "Its just a title" but at least I can say that. By saying that I am trying to show individuals like you that I understand your point of view. I am not closed minded, only thinking my opinion is right.

I'm trying to show my understanding of your opinion and acknowledge it, while saying I disagree and here is why... I'm not blabbing out one pov and then posting comments after just saying I'm right, you're wrong, I'm right, you're wrong, like some of us.

Read my last post to LDJ I discuss the true man comment.  If you're too lazy too then basically no I don't think a true man needs to have a family and be married. I understand that a lot won't.

And, I agree with you real men do see the world for what is it and try not to live a fairy tale. I certainly am not trying to live a fake fairy tale. I see the world for what it is, and because I see how the world is I value my marriage, I respect the title and the bond I have with my wife. Since it's just a title I feel even more connected with my wife; it's not marriage or a fake fairy tale love that is keeping us together and strong, its us, we are putting in the work to keep that, title. I feel that although I have many goals and aspirations, my main purpose in life is to raise and protect a family with my lovely wife.

Goodnight.

But before you had the title how did you feel? How was yalls bond. Im just trying to see this defining moment and how a word transitioned your emotions and feeings. And if you not had that title would your love/bond feelings you have for your wife/kids would change? Before you had the title what was your feelings? Its comming across like your giving tangible and living atributes to word, something that is intangible and does not have living attributes. And if its not about status and simply just to have a label brand/title a definition for what you have for society then what is it then? You openly said you can have all those things without the title, so what is the reasoning for the title if not for validity/ social norms and the label? In your eyes. Im not trying to put words in your mouth.

Bad example here but its early and this is the best I can come up with in the we early of the hours. If two ppl are experts on working on cars, both are proficient/skilled at what they do, but one calls himself a mechanic and has all his titles/accolades etc posted up in the shop and the other person doesnt. Is the guy who label himself, post his accolades anymore skilled then the other person? And if not to be labeled and seek acceptance, acknowledgement from patrons etc what would be the reason for posting his titles accolades? 

  

 

[mrsouthernhospitality]

Originally Posted by ksteezy

Mrsouthernhospitality - how old are you?...not trying to bash you but maybe you haven't mature enough to make that step, can't say I blame you, just like you I held of onthe idea of marriage for a looooong time....only difference is I'm not afraid to admit I was thinking like a little boy....it is what it is, just don't spit that none-sense about your relationship >>>>> ANY marriage

Any good marriage >>>>>>> any good bf/gf relationship, let us be serious..

 at not being mature enough?
Im 25 going on 26 in October 
and my girl is the same age I dont know how could I make it any clearer 

that we both made this decision and came into an agreement

im not the only man that feels like that and shes not the only women that feels 

that way 

the crazy part about your argument is that you think there are not

any sensible,mature and responsible adults that view it the same way as me

you cant even show me a poll that says 100% of people man or women say that marriage is necessary 

any good marriage ======= any good bf/gf relationship 

only difference is a ring and it helps on your taxes

to me the American court system benefits of you marriage more then you do 

Im also going to keep saying my relationship >>>>>>>>>>>>>any marriage

its plenty of married couples that dont know $#!@ about each other 

im pretty sure there are tons of 4#!@%% marriages right now

weather married or not you deal with the same core issues 

 @ not being mature enough like everybody wants to take the same route as you 

 

[mrsouthernhospitality]

Originally Posted by ksteezy

Mrsouthernhospitality - how old are you?...not trying to bash you but maybe you haven't mature enough to make that step, can't say I blame you, just like you I held of onthe idea of marriage for a looooong time....only difference is I'm not afraid to admit I was thinking like a little boy....it is what it is, just don't spit that none-sense about your relationship >>>>> ANY marriage

Any good marriage >>>>>>> any good bf/gf relationship, let us be serious..

 at not being mature enough?
Im 25 going on 26 in October 
and my girl is the same age I dont know how could I make it any clearer 

that we both made this decision and came into an agreement

im not the only man that feels like that and shes not the only women that feels 

that way 

the crazy part about your argument is that you think there are not

any sensible,mature and responsible adults that view it the same way as me

you cant even show me a poll that says 100% of people man or women say that marriage is necessary 

any good marriage ======= any good bf/gf relationship 

only difference is a ring and it helps on your taxes

to me the American court system benefits of you marriage more then you do 

Im also going to keep saying my relationship >>>>>>>>>>>>>any marriage

its plenty of married couples that dont know $#!@ about each other 

im pretty sure there are tons of 4#!@%% marriages right now

weather married or not you deal with the same core issues 

 @ not being mature enough like everybody wants to take the same route as you 

 

[blackmagnus514]

Not for nothing,

seeing your parents failed marriage does have an affect on you and I do understand OPs stance. Me personally, marriage is just as much a business decision as it would be an emotional one. You guys are joining assets and god forbid it goes wrong, she can be paid alimony and child support. Ya'll have seen thse high profile divorce cases. All that love goes out the window when it's time to be vindicated in courts and women more than likely have the courts on their side.

You dont need a marriage to start a family in 2K11 and like Ninjahood said, marriage is probably the most irrelevant it's been in history. At the same time, growing old with someone who is ideally your best friend isnt a bad thought to fathom.

I dont exactly know a lot of men jumping at the thought to get married though. Im at the middle of my 20s so maybe it may be that age.

 

[blackmagnus514]

Not for nothing,

seeing your parents failed marriage does have an affect on you and I do understand OPs stance. Me personally, marriage is just as much a business decision as it would be an emotional one. You guys are joining assets and god forbid it goes wrong, she can be paid alimony and child support. Ya'll have seen thse high profile divorce cases. All that love goes out the window when it's time to be vindicated in courts and women more than likely have the courts on their side.

You dont need a marriage to start a family in 2K11 and like Ninjahood said, marriage is probably the most irrelevant it's been in history. At the same time, growing old with someone who is ideally your best friend isnt a bad thought to fathom.

I dont exactly know a lot of men jumping at the thought to get married though. Im at the middle of my 20s so maybe it may be that age.

 

[mrsouthernhospitality]

Originally Posted by LDJ

Originally Posted by PleasurePhD

Originally Posted by LDJ


So I guess your saying before the indoctrine of the euro-centric version of marriage men werent men, and the family structure wasnt intact? Funny you say that because ppl had a stronger bond and life was better actually then than it is of now. Lol so life isnt worth living unless you get married have kids and get the thumbs up etc... from the govt? So by your logic all single ppl, and homosexuals should just off themselves seeing they cant/dont have the typical euro-centric version of what life is about?

Before I had kids/had a family I loved life and enjoyed life. I didnt feel less of a person then or now. I enjoyed both the wild and crazy party life, same as I love the family life. This isnt a all of nothing type of things, Why cant you love and enjoy both equally but for different reasons. And this whle age thing is irrelevant. Being 40+ doesnt make you anymore ready for a family/kids then a person thats 25. Only aspect that would matter and make a difference is again money. 

Again the only benefit of being married is from a fiscal standpoint, and a status standpoint. And if your doing ok in life then that lil money you get from the govt isnt much of nothing. And if your getting married for status or validation from the outside world then iuno what to say.
  

Really? How can you compare the two if there was no definition or term or title for marriage as we know? Its like saying men were not men back in the day when there was no term for man. $%$ kinda logic. Those individuals being together, raising a family, and having a stronger bond were basically married, but anyways, that bond is what I'm talking about. As you can see in my post I don't really talk about marriage, but the bond. I say you can't really compare the two because in our society today we do value marriage as a defined term which describes a particular type of couple. I'm not demasculinating those who are single or homosexual. WOW buddy. I consistently said I understand those of you who want to have a family and long lasting relationship with someone, but do not want to get married. All I add to that is basically a why not? Especially since there are benefits.

Things were better back in the day when there was no term for marriage as we know? I'm sorry I thought life had progressed into a much better, safer, and advanced world. Thought that equality between sexes was better then back in the day club your woman in the head if she disobeys. Guess you proved me wrong.

Basically buddy your guess was wrong, completely wrong. I am merely stating my opinion on why I value marriage as a man. Just because you are single or homosexual doesn't mean you don't want too get married or value it. So why would I assume they should off themselves? Did I not say there are plenty of other goals and aspirations in life? One doesn't need to be married to be a man in my eyes. But, one should respect the opinion of another man who does value marriage. Heck I know plenty of guys who I would call real men that are not married. The difference is they respect the value of marriage and aren't trying to bash it or bash other guys who value it. Even if marriage is just not for you and you have other goals in life I would still consider you a real man if you pursued those goals as well as just respected others including men who value marriage. These men aren't who I would consider not to be men. The guys that don't care to understand, and even spit, on the bond (not marriage) but  the bond between a couple and family are the ones who I would question about being true men, only because I personally see that bond as giving a purpose.

I do respect both which is why I was stating I understand the other side of the opinion. You assumed I didn't. Again, I was stating my opinion on what makes me feel like a true man and give my life purpose. I understand lot of men won't even get the change to marry, but again like I said that doesn't make them less of a man so long as they just respect others that do want to and can understand why they would want too. I have to disagree with you on that age thing too I am only 24 at the moment and I can easily say I am much more grown then when I was even 21. I'm not gonna say mature because I feel like I was mature back then too, but I feel much more experienced and wise now, I could only imagine myself at 40. I would def be much better preped for kids at 40 compared to now, and even now compared to 21. Even if I had millions at all ages.

As for your last statement. The money is a plus, but again imo there are many other benefits cause I value marriage, the title and its meaning, I can give a rat's butt what anyone else thinks, but I do want them to know I am married to my specific wife, not for the validation, but because I am proud of it and I want them to respect it. Marriage is between two individuals who love each other, and that holds the highest value/meaning. The outside world doesn't matter, only what the couple knows and thinks. 

I mean with marriage its such a touchy thing, cause some ppl do it for love, which is kinda funny seeing as a ceremony/paper isnt a determining factor on your feelings or bond between two ppl. Then you have ppl who marry for the materialistic/status aspect of it. Then you have ppl who marry for the whole validation reasons.

I guess why the past 15 yrs I never married my old lady is because Im not materialistic or care about my status in society, i dont seek validity from anyone esp considering ( wont get into that, whole entirely different subject) And I realize I love her and she loves me and we love our kids, and I dont see how a tuxedo, a dress, a piece of paper etc... ceremony will change this.

Again I dont knock ppl who do it but i just dont see how ok one day i sorta loved maybe cared about this person, then all of a sudden i put on this ring, sign this paper and like magic love became strong, our family is good, we are bonded for life. I just fail to see how wordly things can change the factors of something emotionally.

Whether you admit it or realize it or not you got married for one of the reasons I mentioned. I cant see how ok you felt a certain way about your sig. other, then all of this changed enhanced from the time you went from the end of the eisle to the front of the eisle. Or how sliding a ring on a finger transformed the feelings/bond you two had right before you placed the rings on.

all this

I feel the same way 

and if any due fell the same way should be able to have this conversation with your sig other

me as a man I had no problem with opening up my mouth a saying how I felt about the subject

and fortunately enough she felt the same way as me

everybody got different views on this subject man and women