TAY: IT'S A MAN THING GINA

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Here's my situation

I ain't get no box in 1.5 weeks and shorty damn near live w me. I'm tight :stoneface:
Her reason? Oh the usual, headache, etc

The ***** in me wants to be like "**** ya headache". But I'm more thoughtful than that. But still though :stoneface:

Ima just down a pint of cognac before bad and see where that takes me
 
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Here's my situation

I ain't get no box in 1.5 weeks and shorty damn near live w me. I'm tight :stoneface:
Her reason? Oh the usual, headache, etc

The ***** in me wants to be like "**** ya headache". But I'm more thoughtful than that. But still though :stoneface:
Maybe tyrone been givin her dat good good :nerd:
 
Here's my situation

I ain't get no box in 1.5 weeks and shorty damn near live w me. I'm tight :stoneface:
Her reason? Oh the usual, headache, etc

The ***** in me wants to be like "**** ya headache". But I'm more thoughtful than that. But still though :stoneface:

She paying any bills fam ??
 
On the real though shout out to Ecook.

After she was feeling up on me and all that crap and I said its only right i return the favor, like 10 min into the convo i could feel that a awkward silence was coming up. Hit her with the Ecook "what are you drinking? you look way more adventurous than that" line. Next thing you know we're talking about our craziest adventures and once she said she never did it in the car.......yea case closed.

Also, I still dont understand how people mess around with others in relationships. Man dead that ****. Not worth it.

Man, straight up everything I said in here really works wonders. It is tried tested, and yamb approved.

Glad ur killing it my dude :pimp:

Any relationship yamb is not worth it at all.
 
Here's my situation

I ain't get no box in 1.5 weeks and shorty damn near live w me. I'm tight :stoneface:
Her reason? Oh the usual, headache, etc

The ***** in me wants to be like "**** ya headache". But I'm more thoughtful than that. But still though :stoneface:

Ima just down a pint of cognac before bad and see where that takes me

She creepin on u bro
 
Maybe tyrone been givin her dat good good
nerd.gif
Alonzo-Mourning.gif
 
Here's my situation

I ain't get no box in 1.5 weeks and shorty damn near live w me. I'm tight
indifferent.gif

Her reason? Oh the usual, headache, etc

The ***** in me wants to be like "**** ya headache". But I'm more thoughtful than that. But still though
indifferent.gif


Ima just down a pint of cognac before bad and see where that takes me
sounds fishy
 
Here's my situation

I ain't get no box in 1.5 weeks and shorty damn near live w me. I'm tight :stoneface:
Her reason? Oh the usual, headache, etc

The ***** in me wants to be like "**** ya headache". But I'm more thoughtful than that. But still though :stoneface:

Ima just down a pint of cognac before bad and see where that takes me

Gotta put the foot down g. Let ya nuts hang on her. Tell her you not about To be in a relationship where yall get it in bi monthly. If you don't speak up nothing will change
 
Bros...

Quick question...

Main stang... #1 top tier chica.... Invited me to a wedding.

1. I've never been to a wedding.

2. Is their some ulterior motive to this?

I'm in new territory and need some help from TAY.

If this the same girl that you really like and that you've been talking about? If so, there's probably not an ulterior motive.. she likes you, wants you to go with her, that's that. Weddings can be a lot of fun with the right people, you drink, eat, dance, have a good time. I say go for it especially if it's the girl you're into and since you've never been to a wedding. I guess an ulterior motive is it could be kind of "a big deal" in a relationship to go to a wedding because it's a formal event dedicated to love and commitment :lol: but I wouldn't be cynical and look into it too seriously.

Go and enjoy yourself.
 
Yamb came over with groceries last night and damn... she can cook her *** off! Made me some like lemon pepper chicken, sausage w/ sauteed apples & bell peppers, seasoned crispy potato slices, and then she chopped up an onion and let it sit in vinegar for a little and used that as a garnish on top. My plate looked like a mountain and I demolished all of it. First time she has ever cooked for a guy she said. It was delicious.

I had the fire pit blazing out back while she was cooking and she comes out and starts messing with the fire and putting potatoes in it. I'm like WTF? Takes them out like 20-30 minute later, salts them and starts scraping the inside out on a spoon and feeding to me. **** was amazing it had such a good smokey taste to it :wow: Said she used to do it all the time back in Uzbekistan. Then she brings out a bunch of grapes and we are just eating grapes and drinking wine by the fire :smokin

I told her I'm getting tired and need to go to bed after all the food/wine and she tells me that's not happening. She suggests we take two Patron shots each, so we do, and then smash. I think I made the right decision making her my gf for now :lol: :pimp:

But then after she was asking if I'm going to miss her (I just pretended like I didn't hear it and didn't respond), and telling me she doesn't think she's ever really been in love and asked me how long it took before I told my other gfs I loved them. She's wide open with her feelings now and definitely falling for me pretty hard, I just hope she doesn't get super clingy.
 
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Yambs love fire pits btw. If you have a spot for one in your backyard it's a worthwhile investment as they're not too expensive. Perfect for hanging outside on cooler nights. Wayyy better than just watching TV/Movie/Netflix inside on the couch. Great for having good conversation, make smores if you want (or potatoes :lol:) and when the fire goes out, you already know what time it is...
 
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Its wedding season I'm trying get at these yambs.1
yup my cuzzo is getting married next week :pimp: ..I wish I could go but ima  be in Ocean City


So im scrollin down my fb timeline this chick posted "I dont mess with petty _'s..a man needs to be a provider..if he don't help with bills, put gas in my car, or get my hair n nails done he not _'in with me cuz I can do bad all by myself"

MAN what!!!!! :wow:  :rofl: you can miss me with that :smh: ...yea dudes are supposed to be a provider but at the same time relationships are just that not job opporutnities..and also :x  to the 10+ dudes that commented on that status agreeing with her..

As a provider all that **** would come standard. But talking about it like that disgusts me, women like that don't deserve that treatment.
 
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And people didnt believe me when I said the girl Hennessy got is gonna be mad loyal and chill :smh: :lol:

The reason I dont mess with them as much is because of the clingy and marriage factor though.
 
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Yamb came over with groceries last night and damn... she can cook her *** off! Made me some like lemon pepper chicken, sausage w/ sauteed apples & bell peppers, seasoned crispy potato slices, and then she chopped up an onion and let it sit in vinegar for a little and used that as a garnish on top. My plate looked like a mountain and I demolished all of it. First time she has ever cooked for a guy she said. It was delicious.

I had the fire pit blazing out back while she was cooking and she comes out and starts messing with the fire and putting potatoes in it. I'm like WTF? Takes them out like 20-30 minute later, salts them and starts scraping the inside out on a spoon and feeding to me. **** was amazing it had such a good smokey taste to it :wow: Said she used to do it all the time back in Uzbekistan. Then she brings out a bunch of grapes and we are just eating grapes and drinking wine by the fire :smokin

I told her I'm getting tired and need to go to bed after all the food/wine and she tells me that's not happening. She suggests we take two Patron shots each, so we do, and then smash. I think I made the right decision making her my gf for now :lol: :pimp:

But then after she was asking if I'm going to miss her (I just pretended like I didn't hear it and didn't respond), and telling me she doesn't think she's ever really been in love and asked me how long it took before I told my other gfs I loved them. She's wide open with her feelings now and definitely falling for me pretty hard, I just hope she doesn't get super clingy.

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Jk, looks like u got a keeper
 
Yall remember that girl that ALWAYS hits me up when she breaks up with her dude??

Yeah, smashing that tomorrow night :smokin

@youngdoc hitting DTF Friday night, lettuce go!
 
Yall remember that girl that ALWAYS hits me up when she breaks up with her dude??

Yeah, smashing that tomorrow night :smokin

@youngdoc hitting DTF Friday night, lettuce go!


:pimp:


I had one like that but I had to cut her off cause sometimes she was just lying and still with him + she was flaky.


() was bomb though, can't lie.
 
:pimp:


I had one like that but I had to cut her off cause sometimes she was just lying and still with him + she was flaky.


() was bomb though, can't lie.

I've actually never smashed her. Few weeks after I met her she became official with dude. Whenever they have a fight/ break up type thing she hits me and says she wants it.

This time I guess dude was texting some girl... Saw her IG pics for like 3 days straight and then comes the text...

"Hang out soon, yes?"


Saying she wants to spend the night in my bed. Too easy.
 
My ***** said Uzbekistan though 
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These foreign broads be knowing how to make cats happy bruhs.
 
Got a situation TAYers.

What are you guys' stance on cougars? Got this lady I work with who's been on me OD hard. She's 54, but she's sexy. She seems real seasoned too. She's been blatantly obvious with flirting with me. Randomly coming up to me giving me massages in front of people, always giving me deep hugs, telling me how handsome I am and all this crazy ****. She has a son older than me and im always trying to be respectful cause I've never really been interested but this past month she's been trying to get at me EXTRA hard. She's been grabbing my *** and blowing me kisses. She asked for me to take her to work and pick her up about 2 weeks ago because she was having car trouble and I knew she was gonna try and practically rape me if I was alone with her so I brought my homeboy/coworker with me. The end of the day she tries to give me $50 for gas, I tell her it's straight. She slides the money in my pocket and keeps her hand in there about 4 seconds too long and winks at me. Me and my boy are like :rofl: she then sends me about 5 heart eye emojis later on that evening. She's mad hungry for the cock and all my boys are telling me to take her down but I haven't been bout the cougar life before. I've been trying to fly the straight and narrow too with my girl but curiosity has me wanting to try out the seasoned yambs. Should I give in to temptation and risk a weird work environment or play the faithful guy role to my girl and wonder what if. Advice fellas cause this is wild :lol:
 
^^^ If u have a girl u are all good with... Why do it?

If u know u and ur girl are done, different story.

Cougars are mad fun man.
 
@lamekilla   ill leave this here for you
Rusty Story

Ok brahs there is the “rape” story. Bare with me because it I gotta set up the event because if just told you guys what went down, you probably won't believe me. Sorry for it being so long

Here is the background, sets up what happened in the store.

I was working at a Office Depot in VA. I lived in Maryland and it was a 1-1.5 hour commute but I was getting paid $5 more an hour that what I was getting at my previous job so I took it and made the drive.

One afternoon I met this older black lady, cool lady, real funny, cursed a lot. I sold her a computer table , printer, and some other **** for her home offide. She wanted to save money on delivery cost, so me being the hustler that I am I said I'll take bring your **** to your after work house for half the delivery and assembly cost (since it was on my way home, but doing this was a major no-no. I could get fired for such acts). I told her to keep it on the hush. She agreed on the condition that she drove my car to her house and I drive her's after work, I agreed. I was all about making money, any money, back then.

Now after work I drive to the house, nice townhouse. I take the stuff out my car, and put together the computer desk. Now homegirl sees I'm handy so she starts pointing **** out she wants fixed in her house. That leads so us making an arrangement that I would come by ever Tuesday to fix ****. She would pay me $80 every time I showed up. Now thinking back that was a ****** deal for her. It was always around a hour-hour and a half of work, and it was basic handy man or fixing computer stuff.

This arrangement does on for weeks, every Tuesday. One Friday night I had to drop of a shredder at her house. It was like 12 am when I got to her house and I had to be back at work for 8 the next morning. In pasting I tell her I going to stay at a motel for the night to save myself losing the 3 hours of sleep. She insist I crash on the couch. I say nah at first but I was dead tired, so I agreed. It becomes the usual thing, leave work Friday, sleep over, go to work early Saturday.

This is where the relationship takes a turn. She was always touchy feely but I always framed our friendship and either business or mother- son type thing to her. She would always make sex jokes, but nothing really bad. But now I was constantly hearing **** about how wild she was in her day. She even told me a story of how she meet Bill Clinton at a fundraiser diner, and Bill split the game so proper she offer to top him off in the back. She said Bills first reply was “Where's Hill, oh she's right there, not tonight”. Slick Willy 
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 . Homegirl was 59 but look good for her age, and up until menopause, she was bad as ****. I saw pics of her in her 40s, sexy and fuark.

Overtime her sleep clothes transform. First from pajamas, then it turns into her just wearing a wife beater (no bra) and panties to bed. Once again I was seeing that I was cleared for landing but there was no way I was landing my jet on that beat up old runway. During this time I started to holla at this sexy *** Ethiopian chick working at Bestbuy. After a while, we were smashing on the regular, so the routine turns into leave work on Friday night, drop my Ethiopian chick home, smash her, go to the old lady's house, and crash for the night. Ole girl didn't find out I was smashing the young thing until one night she saw the condoms on the coffee table and I might of thought tonight was the night. And since I damn sure didn't try anything with her, she put two and two together.

So time goes by the old lady is feeding me, paying me big money for really mostly my company (see worked from home), walking around half naked in front of me, telling me how much she miss her youth when she would run through dudes left and right and opening up her home to me. And I don't give her the one thing she wants, some D. And to throw salt in the wound I don't sleep there all the time after a while, half the time I sleep at the Ethiopian chick's house.
Now the grand finale. The store manager was my homeboy so he hooked up my schedule and pay rate. He gets transferred, and the new boss has me on some BS, so I decide to quit. I don't tell ole girl until my very last day at the job, a Friday night. I tell her I'm not coming over cause I quit and I don't have to come in on the Saturday morning, and I ain't gonna be making those Tuesday runs anymore. She gets pissed, and starts giving me attitude for not telling her earlier. Anyway she had bought a big office desk because the last one broke, plus some other furniture. I told her I would pay for delivery and assembly for her, but she instead comes to the store with a pick up truck, demanding her stuff. We talk, she calms down, and I think everything is cool.

Now her **** is in the stock room, which is now filled with pallets because deliveries got backlogged. I gotta grab multiple heavy pieces of furniture all by myself since the store is a little busy. So I'm back there struggling, climb metal shelves (like the ones in Home Depot) to get all her stuff. She demands everything right now because if I don't she'll tell the store manager I've been delivering **** for her which is technically stealing. And I know the ***** *** security guard would file charges on me, so I'm a little shook. Also the old lady been pretty good to me, so I'm working like a slave to get her merchandise.

I get almost everything except one box. I can't get it from the front so I try the back of the rack. Now there are two huge steel metal racks (going up to the ceiling) back to back, will a space in between. At one en the is another huge metal rack closing off one end. So it is like a narrow hallway with a dead end. For the life of me I can't get the last box. I tell ole girl, she gets pissed, she says she wants the damn thing. I say come see for yourself. Now we are not suppose to bring customers to the stock room but I don't care at this point and I want to shut this woman up.

So we are back there, I show her the box. She says I need to find a way. She starts climbing rack, I'm trying to stop her, and pull her down off the rack. She was wearing a skirt to and it was getting hiked up with her trying to get the last box. I dunno if it was my hands being on her but ole girl started to get hot. Started bending over down in front of me, trying to rub up against me in the narrow space. Mine you there is **** all in this walk space like crates of sodas and misc. crap. So I don't want her getting hurt and me causing a lawsuit on my last day. Finally she breaks a nail, and notices she got dust all over herself, so she says she is going to the bathroom. I tell stay outside the stockroom, I'll find away, just don't come back there again, I got it.

While she is gone I notice that there is a duplicate of the box I'm trying to get on the ground, under the rack. So I'm on my knees pulling the box when I get a tap on my shoulder. Ole girl was back, she had forgot her high heels back there and came back for them. I noticed she wasn't wearing her pantyhose anymore but didn't think anything of it. So as I'm pulling the box and we're talking. I'm apologizing for not being able to help her around her house anymore, and she is saying she'll miss me. Enitre time I'm looking straight down. All of a sudden Ole girl tells me something like “I cut my knee, look”, so I think of “Damn!” and look up. This bish got her leg propped up on a box, legs wide open, no panties on. Brahs the yambs are fully exposed, and dem thangs were past expiration date 
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So I'm like “damn”, and quickly look away. But curiosity killed the cat and I look back out the corner of my eye. Real talk her box looked like Jabba the Hun flipped sideways. That box was beaten word to Rahzel. If I had to compare the yambs to a pair of shoes, it's like the pair of kicks your dad uses to cut the lawn, it was in that sort of condition. The thing was such a sight I lost myself, and was steering straight on at it for a couple seconds. When I finally caught myself I acted like nothing happened and now I just wanted to get outta there. Ole girl was giving zero dambs at this point, talking that “like what you see...” talk. I wanted out, so I pull the box out, hoisted it up into my arms so that I'm cradling it with two arms. It is so big I can't see forward, I can only look down at the down to try and navigate outta the walk space.

When I said, “ok I got the box, I'm out”. Ole girl must haved snapped, she knew this was the last time she would see me and her last chance at the D, so she took it. All of a sudden I feel her hands undo my belt and she grabs a fist full of penor. I mean homegirl got my balls and shaft in a vice grip. I got this heavy *** box holding so all I can do is tell her to stop and do the Di*K Slang Dance in an attempt to free myself. Now I won't lie, I dunno if was because I was a horny *** 20 year old or she sprinkled something of my D but my general started to salute. This made her even more turned on. Before you know it I felt a cool breeze on my tip, my schlong is now fully whipped out. The Di*k slang ain't working, she's holding on for dear life.

After a couple seconds I feel her start stroking it, I say “Hell Naw” and do the only thing I could think of. I dropped the box. BIG MISTAKE. My penor was positioned in such a way that while it made her let go, the box caught a lot of my shaft. Bending it down and making it recoil gliding along the box on it's way up. So the shaft got hit, then the tip got a small friction burn on the recoil up the box. Also my penor is now cover in dust from the box. I instantly drop down to the floor gripping Lil Rusty in pain and trying to dust off the shaft. 
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You would think she would be done but Nahhhhhh. She then pulls up her skirt and mounts me like her name is GSP, and while doing she pins both my arms between my legs. She is trying to kiss me and I'm cursing at this chick to get off me. I didn't want to shout because I didn't want to be found back there, penor out, with an old chick with no draws on straddling me. So did the only thing you do when someone is pinning you down and your hands aren't free, I buck like crazy. So start bucking like I'm one of those bulls of ESPN2, trying to get the bish off of me, but her top control was on point. Now it looks even worse because it really looks like we are smashing from a far. This lady was riding me like X-Pac. Furthermore this lady is telling me is to stop being a lil btich, and I know I want it. 
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With the bucking my penor started to get a little firm again. I mean, forgive him lord, for lil Rusty does not know what he does. With that situation I start to feels the inside of her thighs on Lil Rusty and I might have grazed the box a couple times. It feels like my dong was rubbing against a Brillo Pad. 
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 And I'm scared that it might slip in, it's a long shot but I've hit 3 one in holes in my lifetime (by age 20 
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 ) so I knew I was good and making impossible shots happen. Thankfully finally I get a hand loose, push her away and execute Brazilian Jiu-jitsu hip escape and get free. I tuck Lil Rusty away and run outta there straight into the break room. Luckily no one was in there because I immediately start washing my D in the sink, used Ivory dish washing liquid and everything. Trying to get off the dust and spoiled yamb juice. 
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I waited in the break room for like half and hour too. Didn't want to face my attacker. 
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 She got another dude to get her ****, and was waiting in the parking lot for me. I didn't even go to my car that night, took the metro all the way back to MD, came back in the morning and to pick up my car. Found and apology letter from the her. I called her that morning for me to pick up my **** from her house (some work clothes, tools and pair of shoes), and had her put in on the sidewalk for me. She left a second letter in the shoes talking about on second thought she not sorry, I lead her on. 
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 I got several phones from her afterwards, always leaving messages offering up the yambs and some top whenever I wanted.

One night I was stuck in VA and I called her desperate 
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. After talks we which a CBA, that for me to get a ride and to sleep over I had to make out with her and get domed up. 
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 Thankfully my homeboy made the trek from B-More to all the way to VA, and scooped me at the final hour. I buy the same dude COD every year as a show of appreciate for what he saved me from that night. 
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TL;DR
-Meet old black chick at job
-Start doing odds jobs for her, and crashing at her place one night a week
-She fiends for some D
-I never give it to her
-Suddenly quit and tell her we'll never see each over again
-She goes Roethlisberger on me
-Trys to forcibly take the D
 
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