Serious topic...my girlfriend got attacked last night.

[balloonoboy]

Originally Posted by Smokey1212

Originally Posted by Stockholm Patriot

Originally Posted by WITNESSkb24

Some of you cracking jokes and making smart remarks (you know who you are) make me absolutely sick, ^^^Nice quoting yourself again, you actually have kids too? Sad, very sad

You're like 12 telling me what's sad, OK.. I'm telling OP what you dudes wont.

While you're telling him "cheer up", "that's messed up" and "it's aight op things will get better" truth is NO IT WILL NOT...not for a long time.
If he loves her and is strong enough to endure the rejection, emotionally and sexually, the accusations, her blaming him for being so far away, him stopping what ever he's has going on in 3 hours away
to be closer to her and still dealing with the average day to day male to female drama then sure, things might get better.

So if I make you sick you're actually a sad person, and what's wrong with society, burring your head in the ground like an ostrich feeding this poor guy cold, mechanical positive reinforcement
and go jump into a "female appreciation thread" beasting and talkinf about "I'll catch a charge for hit that breezy right there"

check out those links OP, if you're mature and this is a serious thread, those links will get you in the right direction bro.

Like DC said bro it's your delivery of the information to the OP that was awful.  You don't have to just regurgitate cliches like everyone else like you are saying, but you don't have to be callous when suggesting your supposed "truths" either.

Furthermore, if you really were such a student of psychology, then you'd know that nothing in terms of outcomes of psychological stress is 100% for sure. Hell, nothing in terms of any psychological disease model is 100% correlative to some cause or infliction. Of course there's going to be a cause and effect on traumatic situations such as this, but to say that OP's girl is going to shun him/turn lesbian/other garbage in such definite terms suggests to me that you don't know !!%# about psychology.  Different outcomes for different people based on the situation.  Could what you said happen? Sure. But is it a foregone conclusion like you make it sound? Hell naw.

First thing you learn in psychology is that there is no absolute answer, and that different models, or a combination of these models, can be used to explain behavior.

 

[asianplayer]

Be supportive. Could also talk to a therapist on how to help victims.

 

[stockholm patriot]

Originally Posted by Smokey1212

Oh, my bad cause for a second I thought I was on Niketalk and wasn't writing a medical journal for SNEAKERHEADS.
I personally could care less what you believe with all that "if you were really" this NIKETALK bruh bruh....

So if OP was blind folded and walking toward a canyon cliff 1200 ft deep...what would you say?
"It's OK OP just walk slowly not everyone can afford a parachute, you have my prayers though fam"

The TRUTH is NEVER TOLD nicely cause it hurts...and most of us are from urban areas anyway, so why dudes are acting all brand new is mind boggling
I hate how some of you get all humanitarian depending on what thread you in, THEN next thread  it's "thank you based god rape my girl in the number 2"
or co-signing some insensitive barbaric jargon.

I think thus far I'm the only person that gave OP something he could actually use besides a "Stepford Wives" type condolence...he asked for advice not sympathy


preach that way 

--->

 

[stockholm patriot]

Originally Posted by Smokey1212

Oh, my bad cause for a second I thought I was on Niketalk and wasn't writing a medical journal for SNEAKERHEADS.
I personally could care less what you believe with all that "if you were really" this NIKETALK bruh bruh....

So if OP was blind folded and walking toward a canyon cliff 1200 ft deep...what would you say?
"It's OK OP just walk slowly not everyone can afford a parachute, you have my prayers though fam"

The TRUTH is NEVER TOLD nicely cause it hurts...and most of us are from urban areas anyway, so why dudes are acting all brand new is mind boggling
I hate how some of you get all humanitarian depending on what thread you in, THEN next thread  it's "thank you based god rape my girl in the number 2"
or co-signing some insensitive barbaric jargon.

I think thus far I'm the only person that gave OP something he could actually use besides a "Stepford Wives" type condolence...he asked for advice not sympathy


preach that way 

--->

 

[himhotdemnot]

Originally Posted by JayzOnMyToes

damn yo what is up with these guys raping women smh

 

[himhotdemnot]

Originally Posted by JayzOnMyToes

damn yo what is up with these guys raping women smh

 

[guskillah]

OP if ur still in Houston and you want to talk im here for you. I might not have all the answers but i can listen pm me if you want . The only thing i can tell you is that be there for you girl and if she needs anything u be there for her. You gotta be extra careful with her now. I hope you find out who did that and please think twice before doing something.

Some of y'all responses make me sick for real c'mon son this aint no joke and if you aint got something nice to say dont say anything.

 

[guskillah]

OP if ur still in Houston and you want to talk im here for you. I might not have all the answers but i can listen pm me if you want . The only thing i can tell you is that be there for you girl and if she needs anything u be there for her. You gotta be extra careful with her now. I hope you find out who did that and please think twice before doing something.

Some of y'all responses make me sick for real c'mon son this aint no joke and if you aint got something nice to say dont say anything.

 

[balloonoboy]

Patriot, this isn't about you man. Let's not let this post turn into something it's not.

We should be there for our fellow NT brethren, not chastise him.

 

[balloonoboy]

Patriot, this isn't about you man. Let's not let this post turn into something it's not.

We should be there for our fellow NT brethren, not chastise him.

 

[witnesskb24]

Originally Posted by Stockholm Patriot

Originally Posted by WITNESSkb24

Some of you cracking jokes and making smart remarks (you know who you are) make me absolutely sick, ^^^Nice quoting yourself again, you actually have kids too? Sad, very sad

You're like 12 telling me what's sad, OK.. I'm telling OP what you dudes wont.

While you're telling him "cheer up", "that's messed up" and "it's aight op things will get better" truth is NO IT WILL NOT...not for a long time.
If he loves her and is strong enough to endure the rejection, emotionally and sexually, the accusations, her blaming him for being so far away, him stopping what ever he's has going on in 3 hours away
to be closer to her and still dealing with the average day to day male to female drama then sure, things might get better.

So if I make you sick you're actually a sad person, and what's wrong with society, burring your head in the ground like an ostrich feeding this poor guy cold, mechanical positive reinforcement
and go jump into a "female appreciation thread" beasting and talkinf about "I'll catch a charge for hit that breezy right there"

check out those links OP, if you're mature and this is a serious thread, those links will get you in the right direction bro.

Hmmm when did I ever say anything to him trying to bring pitty to the situation?  Yeah, the positive reinforcement will only go so far, only him and her can work on this.  How bout this, say one of your kids died and you make a thread and I say "Oh well, have another one.  No loss", that really what you wanna hear?  You tried making some whack remark and then tried backing it up with links, you're intelligent bro.  And no, I don't go in female appreciation threads, I wouldn't have had a problem with what you said to him had you not sounded like a clown the first time trying to reach.

 

[witnesskb24]

Originally Posted by Stockholm Patriot

Originally Posted by WITNESSkb24

Some of you cracking jokes and making smart remarks (you know who you are) make me absolutely sick, ^^^Nice quoting yourself again, you actually have kids too? Sad, very sad

You're like 12 telling me what's sad, OK.. I'm telling OP what you dudes wont.

While you're telling him "cheer up", "that's messed up" and "it's aight op things will get better" truth is NO IT WILL NOT...not for a long time.
If he loves her and is strong enough to endure the rejection, emotionally and sexually, the accusations, her blaming him for being so far away, him stopping what ever he's has going on in 3 hours away
to be closer to her and still dealing with the average day to day male to female drama then sure, things might get better.

So if I make you sick you're actually a sad person, and what's wrong with society, burring your head in the ground like an ostrich feeding this poor guy cold, mechanical positive reinforcement
and go jump into a "female appreciation thread" beasting and talkinf about "I'll catch a charge for hit that breezy right there"

check out those links OP, if you're mature and this is a serious thread, those links will get you in the right direction bro.

Hmmm when did I ever say anything to him trying to bring pitty to the situation?  Yeah, the positive reinforcement will only go so far, only him and her can work on this.  How bout this, say one of your kids died and you make a thread and I say "Oh well, have another one.  No loss", that really what you wanna hear?  You tried making some whack remark and then tried backing it up with links, you're intelligent bro.  And no, I don't go in female appreciation threads, I wouldn't have had a problem with what you said to him had you not sounded like a clown the first time trying to reach.

 

[frostythepoptart]

i respect what stockholm is saying but you really should have found a middle ground between those that question your delivery and your "truths" regardless of what may be right it's not necessarily needed.

best of luck OP sorry to hear and there's not much you can do. talk to her , listen, but you gotta respect her decision on handling it.

 

[frostythepoptart]

i respect what stockholm is saying but you really should have found a middle ground between those that question your delivery and your "truths" regardless of what may be right it's not necessarily needed.

best of luck OP sorry to hear and there's not much you can do. talk to her , listen, but you gotta respect her decision on handling it.

 

[iammd]

damaged goods tho? thats horrible.
So someone you love gets raped and you leave them when they need you? 

 

[iammd]

damaged goods tho? thats horrible.
So someone you love gets raped and you leave them when they need you? 

 

[stockholm patriot]

[h1][font=Arial, sans-serif]EMOTIONAL/PSYCHOLOGICAL EFFECTS[/font][/h1][h2][font=Arial, sans-serif]BORDERLINEPERSONALITY DISORDER[/font][/h2]
[font=Arial, sans-serif]Morethan 80% of women diagnosed with borderline personality disorder, amental illness characterized by impulsive behaviors including intenseanger, suicidal tendencies, self-mutilation, promiscuity anddifficulties with relationships, report some sort of childhoodtrauma:[/font][sup][font=Arial, sans-serif] #sdfootnote1sym[/font][/sup]
[h2][font=Arial, sans-serif]HEALTH RISKS[/font][/h2]
[font=Arial, sans-serif]Nearly1/3 of all rape victims develop rape-related Post Traumatic StressDisorder (PTSD) in their lifetimes.[/font][sup][font=Arial, sans-serif]#sdfootnote1sym[/font][/sup]

[font=Arial, sans-serif]Adultpsychiatric problems associated with child abuse appear to be moresevere when the victim has experienced more than one type of abuse,such as both sexual and physical abuse.[/font][sup][font=Arial, sans-serif]#sdfootnote2sym[/font][/sup]

[font=Arial, sans-serif]Emotionaland behavioral symptoms exhibited by adult survivors of child sexualabuse can include: major depression, adjustment disorder, alcohol orother substance abuse, personality disorders, multiple personalitydisorder and psychosexual dysfunctions.[/font][sup][font=Arial, sans-serif]#sdfootnote3sym[/font][/sup]

[font=Arial, sans-serif]Youngadults with at least one incident of forced sex during childhood werefar more likely to engage in high-risk behaviors than were non-abusedyoung people:[/font][sup][font=Arial, sans-serif] #sdfootnote4sym[/font][/sup]

• 
  [font=Arial, sans-serif]Theywere four times more likely to engage in sex with strangers;[/font]
• 
  [font=Arial, sans-serif]Theywere twice as likely to have multiple sexual partners; [/font]
• 
  [font=Arial, sans-serif]Thefemales were twice as likely to become pregnant before age 18;[/font]
• 
  [font=Arial, sans-serif]Thesurvivors were twice as likely to contract HIV.[/font]

[font=Arial, sans-serif]Themajority of women with histories of multiple types of abuse had twicethe rates of hospitalization than did non-abused women. Higher ratesof surgery were also related to multiple types of abuse.[/font][sup][font=Arial, sans-serif]#sdfootnote5sym[/font][/sup]

[font=Arial, sans-serif]Physicaland sexual dating violence against adolescent girls is associatedwith increased risk of substance use, unhealthy weight controlbehaviors, sexual risk behaviors, pregnancy, and suicidality.[/font]

[sup][font=Arial, sans-serif]#sdfootnote6sym[/font][/sup]
[font=Arial, sans-serif]

[/font][h2][font=Arial, sans-serif]SUBSTANCE ABUSE[/font][/h2]
[font=Arial, sans-serif]Comparedto non-victims of crime, rape victims were:[/font]

• 
  [font=Arial, sans-serif]5.3time more likely to have used prescription drugs non-medically;[/font]
• 
  [font=Arial, sans-serif]6.4times more likely to have used have used hard drugs;[/font]
• 
  [font=Arial, sans-serif]3.4times more likely to have used marijuana.[/font][sup][font=Arial, sans-serif]#sdfootnote1sym[/font][/sup]

[font=Arial, sans-serif]70%of female substance abusers in treatment had histories of sexualabuse, vs. 12% of the men in treatment.[/font][sup][font=Arial, sans-serif]#sdfootnote2sym[/font][/sup][font=Arial, sans-serif][/font]

[font=Arial, sans-serif]Sexualabuse survivors of both sexes were 70-80% more likely to report heavyalcohol abuse, as well as excessive use of tranquilizers, than werenon-abused adults.[/font][sup][font=Arial, sans-serif]#sdfootnote3sym[/font][/sup]

[font=Arial, sans-serif]Sexuallyabused women started smoking about two years earlier than did otherwomen and were more likely to abuse other drugs as well.[/font][sup][font=Arial, sans-serif]#sdfootnote4sym[/font][/sup][font=Arial, sans-serif] [/font]
[h2][font=Arial, sans-serif]SUICIDE[/font][/h2]
[font=Arial, sans-serif]Rapevictims were 4.1 times more likely than non-crime victims to havecontemplated suicide and 13 times more likely to have made a suicideattempt.[/font]


[font=Arial, sans-serif][/font]

[sup][font=Arial, sans-serif]#sdfootnote5sym[/font][/sup]
Link


OP without exposing MY LOVED ONES, I'm telling from EXPERIENCE that if you love this girl get ready for a load of problem that you might have to make
serious LIFE ADJUSTMENTS for if you care and really want to be there.

and to my new fan club, I wasn't reaching...I've dealt with suicide attempts, domestic violence, and everything else that comes along with supporting a rape victim.
It's messes them up mentally in ways most of you sheltered one-sided dudes can't comprehend...

 

[stockholm patriot]

[h1][font=Arial, sans-serif]EMOTIONAL/PSYCHOLOGICAL EFFECTS[/font][/h1][h2][font=Arial, sans-serif]BORDERLINEPERSONALITY DISORDER[/font][/h2]
[font=Arial, sans-serif]Morethan 80% of women diagnosed with borderline personality disorder, amental illness characterized by impulsive behaviors including intenseanger, suicidal tendencies, self-mutilation, promiscuity anddifficulties with relationships, report some sort of childhoodtrauma:[/font][sup][font=Arial, sans-serif] #sdfootnote1sym[/font][/sup]
[h2][font=Arial, sans-serif]HEALTH RISKS[/font][/h2]
[font=Arial, sans-serif]Nearly1/3 of all rape victims develop rape-related Post Traumatic StressDisorder (PTSD) in their lifetimes.[/font][sup][font=Arial, sans-serif]#sdfootnote1sym[/font][/sup]

[font=Arial, sans-serif]Adultpsychiatric problems associated with child abuse appear to be moresevere when the victim has experienced more than one type of abuse,such as both sexual and physical abuse.[/font][sup][font=Arial, sans-serif]#sdfootnote2sym[/font][/sup]

[font=Arial, sans-serif]Emotionaland behavioral symptoms exhibited by adult survivors of child sexualabuse can include: major depression, adjustment disorder, alcohol orother substance abuse, personality disorders, multiple personalitydisorder and psychosexual dysfunctions.[/font][sup][font=Arial, sans-serif]#sdfootnote3sym[/font][/sup]

[font=Arial, sans-serif]Youngadults with at least one incident of forced sex during childhood werefar more likely to engage in high-risk behaviors than were non-abusedyoung people:[/font][sup][font=Arial, sans-serif] #sdfootnote4sym[/font][/sup]

• 
  [font=Arial, sans-serif]Theywere four times more likely to engage in sex with strangers;[/font]
• 
  [font=Arial, sans-serif]Theywere twice as likely to have multiple sexual partners; [/font]
• 
  [font=Arial, sans-serif]Thefemales were twice as likely to become pregnant before age 18;[/font]
• 
  [font=Arial, sans-serif]Thesurvivors were twice as likely to contract HIV.[/font]

[font=Arial, sans-serif]Themajority of women with histories of multiple types of abuse had twicethe rates of hospitalization than did non-abused women. Higher ratesof surgery were also related to multiple types of abuse.[/font][sup][font=Arial, sans-serif]#sdfootnote5sym[/font][/sup]

[font=Arial, sans-serif]Physicaland sexual dating violence against adolescent girls is associatedwith increased risk of substance use, unhealthy weight controlbehaviors, sexual risk behaviors, pregnancy, and suicidality.[/font]

[sup][font=Arial, sans-serif]#sdfootnote6sym[/font][/sup]
[font=Arial, sans-serif]

[/font][h2][font=Arial, sans-serif]SUBSTANCE ABUSE[/font][/h2]
[font=Arial, sans-serif]Comparedto non-victims of crime, rape victims were:[/font]

• 
  [font=Arial, sans-serif]5.3time more likely to have used prescription drugs non-medically;[/font]
• 
  [font=Arial, sans-serif]6.4times more likely to have used have used hard drugs;[/font]
• 
  [font=Arial, sans-serif]3.4times more likely to have used marijuana.[/font][sup][font=Arial, sans-serif]#sdfootnote1sym[/font][/sup]

[font=Arial, sans-serif]70%of female substance abusers in treatment had histories of sexualabuse, vs. 12% of the men in treatment.[/font][sup][font=Arial, sans-serif]#sdfootnote2sym[/font][/sup][font=Arial, sans-serif][/font]

[font=Arial, sans-serif]Sexualabuse survivors of both sexes were 70-80% more likely to report heavyalcohol abuse, as well as excessive use of tranquilizers, than werenon-abused adults.[/font][sup][font=Arial, sans-serif]#sdfootnote3sym[/font][/sup]

[font=Arial, sans-serif]Sexuallyabused women started smoking about two years earlier than did otherwomen and were more likely to abuse other drugs as well.[/font][sup][font=Arial, sans-serif]#sdfootnote4sym[/font][/sup][font=Arial, sans-serif] [/font]
[h2][font=Arial, sans-serif]SUICIDE[/font][/h2]
[font=Arial, sans-serif]Rapevictims were 4.1 times more likely than non-crime victims to havecontemplated suicide and 13 times more likely to have made a suicideattempt.[/font]


[font=Arial, sans-serif][/font]

[sup][font=Arial, sans-serif]#sdfootnote5sym[/font][/sup]
Link


OP without exposing MY LOVED ONES, I'm telling from EXPERIENCE that if you love this girl get ready for a load of problem that you might have to make
serious LIFE ADJUSTMENTS for if you care and really want to be there.

and to my new fan club, I wasn't reaching...I've dealt with suicide attempts, domestic violence, and everything else that comes along with supporting a rape victim.
It's messes them up mentally in ways most of you sheltered one-sided dudes can't comprehend...

 

[al audi]

rape pisses me off

im very sorry to hear this OP, damn man.........id be furious inside

 

[Sir San Diego]

As a married man and father of two girls I can't even imagine what YOU'RE going through right now. As far as counseling goes, you shouldn't rush her into anything, let her heal a bit physically and mentally first and wait until she's ready to fully discuss it with you before you suggest anything. I doubt she's ready to tell a complete stranger about this yet if she's telling you to keep quiet about all of this.

Just take it slow and show her that you're gonna ride this out with her. It's probably gonna be rough at some points, but if you love her, you'll be able to get through it. As for the guy who did it, before you do anything stupid just think about this, YOU are gonna be a prime suspect if something happens to a guy who matches the description of her attacker. I'm not advocating violence by any means, but revenge is a dish best served cold. Think about that and understand what that means.

But really, is it worth it? Do you want to make matters worse if you get locked up behind something and then you really can't be there for her? Just a thought, but you're a man and have to make that call on your own.

I wish you two the best man.




As for the clowns in here... wow. NT is better than this.

 

[Sir San Diego]

As a married man and father of two girls I can't even imagine what YOU'RE going through right now. As far as counseling goes, you shouldn't rush her into anything, let her heal a bit physically and mentally first and wait until she's ready to fully discuss it with you before you suggest anything. I doubt she's ready to tell a complete stranger about this yet if she's telling you to keep quiet about all of this.

Just take it slow and show her that you're gonna ride this out with her. It's probably gonna be rough at some points, but if you love her, you'll be able to get through it. As for the guy who did it, before you do anything stupid just think about this, YOU are gonna be a prime suspect if something happens to a guy who matches the description of her attacker. I'm not advocating violence by any means, but revenge is a dish best served cold. Think about that and understand what that means.

But really, is it worth it? Do you want to make matters worse if you get locked up behind something and then you really can't be there for her? Just a thought, but you're a man and have to make that call on your own.

I wish you two the best man.




As for the clowns in here... wow. NT is better than this.

 

[al audi]

rape pisses me off

im very sorry to hear this OP, damn man.........id be furious inside

 

[smokey1212]

Originally Posted by Stockholm Patriot

Originally Posted by Smokey1212

Oh, my bad cause for a second I thought I was on Niketalk and wasn't writing a medical journal for SNEAKERHEADS.
I personally could care less what you believe with all that "if you were really" this NIKETALK bruh bruh....

So if OP was blind folded and walking toward a canyon cliff 1200 ft deep...what would you say?
"It's OK OP just walk slowly not everyone can afford a parachute, you have my prayers though fam"

The TRUTH is NEVER TOLD nicely cause it hurts...and most of us are from urban areas anyway, so why dudes are acting all brand new is mind boggling
I hate how some of you get all humanitarian depending on what thread you in, THEN next thread  it's "thank you based god rape my girl in the number 2"
or co-signing some insensitive barbaric jargon.

I think thus far I'm the only person that gave OP something he could actually use besides a "Stepford Wives" type condolence...he asked for advice not sympathy


preach that way 

--->

The only thing I suggested was to not speak in a definitive manner.  If including words such as "possibly" into your responses is really what you believe segregates NT from the New England Journal of Medicine then you are doing it wrong. You may not care what I know to be true, but just in case anyone thinks your so-called advice is actually based on some sort of guaranteed fact, I hope to dissuade them because your "useful advice" that the OP can use could turn out to be garbage.

Your advice for that cliff scenario would undoubtedly be "It's all good OP, I'll help ya, sprint towards that cliff and end it all faster cuz it's an inevitability that you gonna die."  When in reality he may not be on a cliff in the first place.  My advice? Take off the damn blindfold, see where you're at and act accordingly.

The truth is never told nicely cuz it hurts.  The hell does that even mean or allude to? Even the most painful truths can be told in an empathetic manner.  Don't go around trying to coin that phrase.

Take your nonsense advice and dumb sayings that way

---->

 

[balloonoboy]

Unless his girl has Borderline Personality Disprder, none of that applies to her.

Please stop.

 

[balloonoboy]

Unless his girl has Borderline Personality Disprder, none of that applies to her.

Please stop.