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Serious topic...my girlfriend got attacked last night.
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- May 21, 2005
I am so so so sorry. I can only imagine what you are going through. May she get all the strength she needs to get through all of this.
You can be there for her the best way you can on her road to recovery and becoming a survivor. Surviving rape, sexual abuse, sexual assault, incest, and molestation will definitely cause all kinds of feelings to emerge. She will be suffering from Post Traumatic Stress Disorder. As part of the healing process and as a survivor, she will undergo a dramatic reality shift, and see life and herself drastically different than before. Feelings of anger, fear, shock, denial, and confusion are all completely normal. Her pain will not go away so simply. It is a matter of how she can find that safe outlet. Please keep making sure she knows she did nothing wrong, she is not to blame, and that she is a survivor and she will overcome this.
All you can do is be there for her anyway you can. As for you, you need to be strong for her because if she does not have that strength, you can provide all the support for her. If you want to know more ways of supporting her, there are plenty of resources and people both of you can talk to. Lots of great online sources of support for rape victims. She does need to talk about it, but give her time to at her own will. Here is a website to start off to educate yourself on how to help support her and protect her:
http://members.tripod.com...nlineresources/id24.html
Her strength will be to open again, to life, and the victory is the fact that, despite it all, she is alive and a survivor.
Please update us on the situation, how she is doing and how you are doing. I wish you and her all the best on the road to recovery.
You can be there for her the best way you can on her road to recovery and becoming a survivor. Surviving rape, sexual abuse, sexual assault, incest, and molestation will definitely cause all kinds of feelings to emerge. She will be suffering from Post Traumatic Stress Disorder. As part of the healing process and as a survivor, she will undergo a dramatic reality shift, and see life and herself drastically different than before. Feelings of anger, fear, shock, denial, and confusion are all completely normal. Her pain will not go away so simply. It is a matter of how she can find that safe outlet. Please keep making sure she knows she did nothing wrong, she is not to blame, and that she is a survivor and she will overcome this.
All you can do is be there for her anyway you can. As for you, you need to be strong for her because if she does not have that strength, you can provide all the support for her. If you want to know more ways of supporting her, there are plenty of resources and people both of you can talk to. Lots of great online sources of support for rape victims. She does need to talk about it, but give her time to at her own will. Here is a website to start off to educate yourself on how to help support her and protect her:
http://members.tripod.com...nlineresources/id24.html
Her strength will be to open again, to life, and the victory is the fact that, despite it all, she is alive and a survivor.
Please update us on the situation, how she is doing and how you are doing. I wish you and her all the best on the road to recovery.
- 3,130
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- May 21, 2005
I am so so so sorry. I can only imagine what you are going through. May she get all the strength she needs to get through all of this.
You can be there for her the best way you can on her road to recovery and becoming a survivor. Surviving rape, sexual abuse, sexual assault, incest, and molestation will definitely cause all kinds of feelings to emerge. She will be suffering from Post Traumatic Stress Disorder. As part of the healing process and as a survivor, she will undergo a dramatic reality shift, and see life and herself drastically different than before. Feelings of anger, fear, shock, denial, and confusion are all completely normal. Her pain will not go away so simply. It is a matter of how she can find that safe outlet. Please keep making sure she knows she did nothing wrong, she is not to blame, and that she is a survivor and she will overcome this.
All you can do is be there for her anyway you can. As for you, you need to be strong for her because if she does not have that strength, you can provide all the support for her. If you want to know more ways of supporting her, there are plenty of resources and people both of you can talk to. Lots of great online sources of support for rape victims. She does need to talk about it, but give her time to at her own will. Here is a website to start off to educate yourself on how to help support her and protect her:
http://members.tripod.com...nlineresources/id24.html
Her strength will be to open again, to life, and the victory is the fact that, despite it all, she is alive and a survivor.
Please update us on the situation, how she is doing and how you are doing. I wish you and her all the best on the road to recovery.
You can be there for her the best way you can on her road to recovery and becoming a survivor. Surviving rape, sexual abuse, sexual assault, incest, and molestation will definitely cause all kinds of feelings to emerge. She will be suffering from Post Traumatic Stress Disorder. As part of the healing process and as a survivor, she will undergo a dramatic reality shift, and see life and herself drastically different than before. Feelings of anger, fear, shock, denial, and confusion are all completely normal. Her pain will not go away so simply. It is a matter of how she can find that safe outlet. Please keep making sure she knows she did nothing wrong, she is not to blame, and that she is a survivor and she will overcome this.
All you can do is be there for her anyway you can. As for you, you need to be strong for her because if she does not have that strength, you can provide all the support for her. If you want to know more ways of supporting her, there are plenty of resources and people both of you can talk to. Lots of great online sources of support for rape victims. She does need to talk about it, but give her time to at her own will. Here is a website to start off to educate yourself on how to help support her and protect her:
http://members.tripod.com...nlineresources/id24.html
Her strength will be to open again, to life, and the victory is the fact that, despite it all, she is alive and a survivor.
Please update us on the situation, how she is doing and how you are doing. I wish you and her all the best on the road to recovery.
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- Jan 12, 2004
Trying to divert the attention away from you and to OPOriginally Posted by mondaynightraw
Didn't read it
Anyway, you shouldn't be posting that type of $%## on here anyway. Go to the police OP
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- Jan 12, 2004
Trying to divert the attention away from you and to OPOriginally Posted by mondaynightraw
Didn't read it
Anyway, you shouldn't be posting that type of $%## on here anyway. Go to the police OP
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- Jan 22, 2010
So did you tell those girls you know who got raped that they are "damaged goods"? You are clearly not seeing the point, what the dude said is true, but the way of delivering it was quite patheticOriginally Posted by Russ tha G
It's good not to sugarcoat things and give OP a false hope or unlikely expectation. This is reality. I know a lot of girls who have been raped, and they all have psychological issues regarding relationships and sex/intimacy. I would imagine somebody would turn to NT or any online message board so they can get raw responses from people who aren't worried about being frank and honest for whatever reason. I'm sure nobody wishes him the worst, but it is a bad situation and OP is going to be able to better handle it if he knows the realities of it from people who have gone through similar things.Originally Posted by oidreez
Originally Posted by Russ tha G
at people getting upset about somebody giving OP a response that is a highly likely outcome for his situation regardless of how blunt and unforgiving it was worded. It's not a movie or fairy tale. Fact is, most women are totally different after they're raped ("damaged goods" as he put it) and nobody was addressing that or giving OP a fair warning of what to expect. You don't have to be a psych major to know that--anybody who knows multiple people who have been raped can point out similarities in the way they changed after the incident.
Many of you either don't know many people or anybody who has been raped or are just completely out of tune with reality.
so it's ok to tell a man that his girl is now "damaged goods" and "gonna turn into a lesbian"? what's the point of telling him that?
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- Jan 22, 2010
So did you tell those girls you know who got raped that they are "damaged goods"? You are clearly not seeing the point, what the dude said is true, but the way of delivering it was quite patheticOriginally Posted by Russ tha G
It's good not to sugarcoat things and give OP a false hope or unlikely expectation. This is reality. I know a lot of girls who have been raped, and they all have psychological issues regarding relationships and sex/intimacy. I would imagine somebody would turn to NT or any online message board so they can get raw responses from people who aren't worried about being frank and honest for whatever reason. I'm sure nobody wishes him the worst, but it is a bad situation and OP is going to be able to better handle it if he knows the realities of it from people who have gone through similar things.Originally Posted by oidreez
Originally Posted by Russ tha G
at people getting upset about somebody giving OP a response that is a highly likely outcome for his situation regardless of how blunt and unforgiving it was worded. It's not a movie or fairy tale. Fact is, most women are totally different after they're raped ("damaged goods" as he put it) and nobody was addressing that or giving OP a fair warning of what to expect. You don't have to be a psych major to know that--anybody who knows multiple people who have been raped can point out similarities in the way they changed after the incident.
Many of you either don't know many people or anybody who has been raped or are just completely out of tune with reality.
so it's ok to tell a man that his girl is now "damaged goods" and "gonna turn into a lesbian"? what's the point of telling him that?
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No, genius. You clearly are missing the point because nobody told his girl that she's damaged goods, obviously. In your zeal to prove me wrong, you forgot that OP wasn't the person who got raped so your "logic" doesn't apply.
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- Aug 2, 2006
No, genius. You clearly are missing the point because nobody told his girl that she's damaged goods, obviously. In your zeal to prove me wrong, you forgot that OP wasn't the person who got raped so your "logic" doesn't apply.
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- Mar 16, 2010
I know this isn't the right place to joke, but did anyone else catch that?? But in all honesty idk what to tell you OP, that's a tough situation that you're in, wish you the best.
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- Mar 16, 2010
I know this isn't the right place to joke, but did anyone else catch that?? But in all honesty idk what to tell you OP, that's a tough situation that you're in, wish you the best.
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- Nov 24, 2004
Exactly...what the hell is Stockholm talking about did he even read?
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- Nov 24, 2004
Exactly...what the hell is Stockholm talking about did he even read?
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- Dec 12, 2008
It's #$$##@ how guys can do this to women. They can't get what they want, so they have to go do this *@#!. smh
Somehow find these punks and go straight "The Town" on their @%*++.
Somehow find these punks and go straight "The Town" on their @%*++.
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- Dec 12, 2008
It's #$$##@ how guys can do this to women. They can't get what they want, so they have to go do this *@#!. smh
Somehow find these punks and go straight "The Town" on their @%*++.
Somehow find these punks and go straight "The Town" on their @%*++.
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- Apr 4, 2006
you know what he means though. did you/would you tell their boyrfriends in person that their girl is damaged goods and gonna be a lesbian/promiscuous?
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- Apr 4, 2006
you know what he means though. did you/would you tell their boyrfriends in person that their girl is damaged goods and gonna be a lesbian/promiscuous?
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- Jan 22, 2010
Oh, well excuse me, I thought you might be intelligent enough to get what I was trying to say and put it together but I guess not, so I'll rephrase it. Did you tell those girls' (if they had boyfriends) boyfriends that they are damaged goods?
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- Jan 22, 2010
Oh, well excuse me, I thought you might be intelligent enough to get what I was trying to say and put it together but I guess not, so I'll rephrase it. Did you tell those girls' (if they had boyfriends) boyfriends that they are damaged goods?
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- May 5, 2009
wow. im sorry OP.
just be there for her.
just be there for her.
- 12,536
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- May 5, 2009
wow. im sorry OP.
just be there for her.
just be there for her.
