GF decides to move to ..

[Mark Antony]

Not necessarily true. My sister and her boyfriend started dating in 1997, when they were in 11th grade and just got married in August of 2013.

People treat marriage differently.

Early 30s though, the pic is a little different than with your hs/college sweetheart.

 

[Chopper]

1. Do you want to spend the rest of your life with her?
2. Did she include you in the application process?
3. Did you know Grenada was an option?
4. Did she ask you if you'd go with her, if she chose Grenada?

 

[phen0m]

It's tough man; was there communication before she made the decision or was it like "this is what I am going to do"?

Yeah, I told her what I would be willing to do/go (miami, philly, PR - (only because my job has a location here) and a few others). I'm not really down for moving to a random island for two years.. but im not trying to be selfish either.. but.. sometimes its necessary to be selfish too(on both parts) lol. confusing right.

Don't marry her...not because she's leaving.

Also... Don't hit her, obligatory statement.

OP so your saying that in 5 years, marriage wasn't even mentioned at all?

You might wanna go through her phone tonight. Wait till she's asleep and go through EVERYTHING
Emails, text messages, Instagram DMs, text messages to FEMALE FRIENDS

She wants to be married now.. have kids when she starts schools.. she talks about this DAILY. Im not ready.. i have my reasons, but i like/love/adore etc the girl.

Honestly, if you wanted to be an md or an astronaut or whatever and you got your opportunity you would be thrilled and you'd want to be with someone who is thrilled for you as well despite the pain with the long distance. It's two years son. If you wanna be with a successful woman, you need to be man enough op. If you aren't making a big splash in your field or on your way, everyone else is right. It won't work. Because you won't understand her passion. Not Tyrone not bc she isn't willing to compromise. One shouldn't have to compromise their lifelong career for someone else's comfort. She doesn't have any other choice if she wants to be an MD. If you pressure her into staying she'll leave and resent you too. I would resent my girl if she tried to play me like that tombout why do you want to be a lawyer you can just be a paralegal

This. x1000. Ive seen this girl go from lost and shuffling her feet in life.. to busting her *** to get to the point of med school. I've kinda always been good professionally(to a degree).. She's worked hard to get to where she is about to be in one regard or another. And while I dont feel bad for being like .. nah, peace, good luck.. I have to investigate and see if theres something im missing.

I dont love often and this shortie def. has my love. I can post a pic, i dont mind, and shes bad. But its beyond that.. she's alot more..but still missing or comes up short in some key areas too. but nothing I cant get past in time? I dont know. Perfectionists have it the roughest. Grenada is just far and remote as *****. And yeah, the fact that she would consider it does miff the **** out of me.. but maybe im too bothered by actions like that.

 

[calimike510]

Bruh let her go, im 33(3 kids and married not that my situation matters), if a woman in her 30's hasn't hint marriage then she has another agenda...is it an out of the blue decision?

 

[Coromanti]

Medical school in the caribbean is significantly cheaper.

5 years should be enough for trust but being an island boy my self I know she gonna be enticed by our foreign charms.

 

[teamlakers909]

LOL she wants to have kids when she starts school? Then she wants you to be a stay home dad right...bc it is impossible to raise children while going to med school and then do residency without a stay at home spouse or you got money for a live in nanny.

 

[itshlittt]

View media item 942949

Island Tyronne is waiting for her plane to land

Jesus

muerto.

 

[lobcity]

Stay with your girl man, you in love she in love. She just tryna better herself for you and her. 

These 2 years you both will probably do a little dirt on the side but when she get back wife her up. 

You will appreciate her more once she is gone.

 

[paulprince3730]

man, theres so much different advice for this situation

Advice A: shes selfish for doing that, if you want to be selfish, you should put your career before her also and just do whats better for you as well

Advice B: if you truly love her, relationships are full of sacrifices, most people dont have to make the hard decision you have, but do you love her enough to move with her (if thats even an option, if she didnt suggest or ask it, then all i can say is see advice A)

Advice C: if you really love her, let her go, and if she comes back then thats how you know its real

personally i would swing with advice A

 

[lobcity]

Island Tyronne is waiting for her plane to land

so dirty and so true at the same time.

 

[phen0m]

LOL she wants to have kids when she starts school? Then she wants you to be a stay home dad right...bc it is impossible to raise children while going to med school and then do residency without a stay at home spouse or you got money for a live in nanny.

Couldnt even tell you boss. Thoughts that dont make sense, are immediately dispatched of. So I scoot right on past this notion whenever it comes up.

 

[calikev34]

When you look into her eyes do you see her soul?







If you hesitated, then she's already gone, bro.
If you knew, then now you should know what to do next.


You're welcome.

 

[phen0m]

When you look into her eyes do you see her soul?







If you hesitated, then she's already gone, bro.
If you knew, then now you should know what to do next.


You're welcome.

 

[calikev34]

Okay, Mr. Phenom.

Serious time (SRS).

Have you seen 5 year engagement?
Whether you have or haven't doesn't really matter, but you should watch it's hilarious bro.

Anyways, fact of the matter if that if you go there begrudgingly you will begin to resent her for forcing you to make that decision.
I agree with someone in this thread who asked if there was potentially opportunity for you in Grenada (in addition to her med school thang)
As human beings we can't live through/ other people and expect to be happy. Unless we're like 90 or something w/ one foot out the door.


PPS: early 30s is too old to be stonefacing ur brahs. lighten up pleighboi. maybe the island life would be good for you? idk you should 1000% go out there for her initial trip to help her set up n ****, and then u can experience the place

 

[blastercombo]

Sorry to say this but she'll 100% forget about you whitin a month. You'll be at home living your normal life, with all your problems, while she's on the beach with island Tyron as said by others

 

[boo700gs]

And this is my beef Stilln. Am I being selfish/petty if I'm like nah not going? As she claims if i don't go for at least a year.. she doesn't go.

Its a two year program, then back to the states for residency. She hasn't accepted yet and is looking for other options, including DO schools.

Not at all being selfish if you don't go. I think that 1 yr request on her part is a red herring or plea for support. Grenada ain't gonna make your career better. Which is also very important. I take it you have goals and ambitions too else why would she be with you? My thinking of a successful repslution here is you both take 2 years to build yourselves even further prior to
Marriage(very important imo) even if you do dirt on the side (unless you see each other every month it's gonna happen) and then get married wen she's back. I'm pulling for you two to work though so maybe I'm biased

 

[T Lo Sweater]

Sorry to say this but she'll 100% forget about you whitin a month. You'll be at home living your normal life, with all your problems, while she's on the beach with island Tyron as said by others

Honestly

Op u should think about going down with her if she goes. U shouldn't have her sacrifice her career for the relationship.

That said let her go there if she decides. How would u feel if she was tellin u dont go?

Go with her, visit a lot, or forget about it. If its meant to be she wont ever do anything behind ur back and betray that trust

I feel for u op. Pm me if anything

 

[phen0m]

Okay, Mr. Phenom.

Serious time (SRS).

Have you seen 5 year engagement?
Whether you have or haven't doesn't really matter, but you should watch it's hilarious bro.

Anyways, fact of the matter if that if you go there begrudgingly you will begin to resent her for forcing you to make that decision.
I agree with someone in this thread who asked if there was potentially opportunity for you in Grenada (in addition to her med school thang)
As human beings we can't live through/ other people and expect to be happy. Unless we're like 90 or something w/ one foot out the door.


PPS: early 30s is too old to be stonefacing ur brahs. lighten up pleighboi. maybe the island life would be good for you? idk you should 1000% go out there for her initial trip to help her set up n ****, and then u can experience the place

I can dig that. And good insights. You actually may've stumbled onto my troubles here ironically. I've never been someone that can live for someone else. Just not wired that way and I dont even think it would matter if she would live for me and my desires as well. At the end of the day, in a few months if it comes to pass. I think I know what ill have to do. This thread is probably just a mental precursor to all of that.

 

[lacrimestopper]

yall are in early 30s and u still havent popped the question? you tryna be an old dad or something? if u dont marry her now, youre gona have to establish another relationship w/ someone which will most likely take another 5 years, so youre seeing marriage at about 37-38..

 

[phen0m]

Sorry to say this but she'll 100% forget about you whitin a month. You'll be at home living your normal life, with all your problems, while she's on the beach with island Tyron as said by others

This isnt even a concern as mentioned. I'm not naive and I wouldnt put myself in that position anyway. Id either go..convince her to stay and go to an "inferior"? school.. or let her go. I dont think theres an in between here.

 

[niketalkerbob]

Speaking from experience, when a loved one gains an opportunity to do something that he or she desires, never think that you are "better" than what they desire. It's better to support her in whatever decision she chooses than to lead her to a decision. Leading her to stay in the states can cause the "what if" factor to play in her head and she will resent you for it if she truly does desire to go and never goes because you led her to stay. Weigh the pros and cons and find out her core desire. Med school is only a few years compared to a lifelong marriage anyways.

 

[phen0m]

yall are in early 30s and u still havent popped the question? you tryna be an old dad or something? if u dont marry her now, youre gona have to establish another relationship w/ someone which will most likely take another 5 years, so youre seeing marriage at about 37-38..

Im a dood and I know cats in industries like marketing and advertisements that dont even start families until mid forties and later. Thats not my lane exactly, but this is not my concern at the moment. Her and I have a ball together. Plus I dont wanna force marriage and kids if its queued to happen organically.

I think the rub here for me, is that ive done my thing my whole life, but 5 years in.. she still has for the most part, my attention, care etc. She's never done dirt and she's a lot of fun to share life with. So yeah I can and will always do whats best for me. But I cant be so flippant as to act like there's not some investigation of thoughts and so forth to be done on my end as well as the parsing of hers.

 

[bhergh]

She prlly wants u to ask her which is why she's telling u she might or is going to Grenada

 

[danger style]

People only really goto the caribbeans as a last resort. No disrespect to DOs but I would choose med school in the caribbeans over a DO program 10/10

 

[raphaeldelaghet]

She prlly wants u to ask her which is why she's telling u she might or is going to Grenada

Giving you the ole switch a roo word to martin and gina...