Confessions

I thought I was the only one that did this. No matter how much I try to get over the grudge, I never forget.

I know what you mean..It's like the person that did something to me could save my life and I'd think to myself "Man _____ is a good dude for pulling me outta that burning building......But I can't believe he had the nerve to not pay me back that $14 he owes me from '97"..I don't know why I'm like that, but I doubt I'll ever change..And that's a sucky way to go thru life but I don't know how to stop..
 
18 year olds jus wanna get pounded

I see her every weekend because she plays soccer (big turn on) in the same fields I play in...she told me how her relationship of 3 years was bad and that she is tired of that and how she wishes to find a nice guy that's sweet, caring and that she is looking for something serious ...at this time I'm thinking wth is going on, is she coming at me?
 
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18 year olds jus wanna get pounded

I see her every weekend because she plays soccer (big turn on) in the same fields I play in...she told me how her relationship of 3 years was bad and that she is tired of that and how she wishes to find a nice guy that's sweet, caring and that she is looking for something serious ...at this time I'm thinking wth is going on, is she coming at me?

RUN LIKE HELL
 
Hanging out with friends tonight at pool, really cute Asian waitress I want to get at but I have just been ****** over by so many people in my life and with my dad never being there, I have abandonment/rejection issues, especially after my ex so I treat girls really mean, like that get them before they get me, feels bad I made fun of her because I really want to holla but just scared of getting rejected again or even liking somebody again. So tired of just being angry/alone, I mean I am a loner but sometimes u just want somebody to just hold and talk to, not even really trying to smash because that **** gets old and empty.. Sad thing I think she might have a thing for me(and being black in Houston Asian chicks really don't check for you like back in the bay) man I sound like a ******g simp but just tired of all this anger and fear I have been carrying around for seven years. Smh
 
Hanging out with friends tonight at pool, really cute Asian waitress I want to get at but I have just been ****** over by so many people in my life and with my dad never being there, I have abandonment/rejection issues, especially after my ex so I treat girls really mean, like that get them before they get me, feels bad I made fun of her because I really want to holla but just scared of getting rejected again or even liking somebody again. So tired of just being angry/alone, I mean I am a loner but sometimes u just want somebody to just hold and talk to, not even really trying to smash because that **** gets old and empty.. Sad thing I think she might have a thing for me(and being black in Houston Asian chicks really don't check for you like back in the bay) man I sound like a ******g simp but just tired of all this anger and fear I have been carrying around for seven years. Smh

let it go my dude, once you let go and release all that negative energy youll be alot happier, cause as you can see right now its just dragin you down...
 
I know what you mean..It's like the person that did something to me could save my life and I'd think to myself "Man _____ is a good dude for pulling me outta that burning building......But I can't believe he had the nerve to not pay me back that $14 he owes me from '97"..I don't know why I'm like that, but I doubt I'll ever change..And that's a sucky way to go thru life but I don't know how to stop..

:lol
That's really funny because that's how I feel and react.

"Oh, you called me x. Well, I'm probably not going to forget so when you need something, don't contact me."
 
Ah man where do I begin

-Been feeling like a loser the past month and change. Haven't been going out much do to no money (barely any hours at work) and it's killing my self-esteem and all of my positivity that I developed the prior month and a half. That coupled with the fact I'm not really dating anyone is killing me. I'm not really depressed anymore but the hit my confidence has taken has more than made up for that

-Though I'm not much of a confident man, I feel like I'm better than most people. The way I carry myself, my beliefs, morals and ideals. I feel like the inner me is :Nthat . If I just improved my motivation, confidence and focus, the "inner josh" would be absolutely perfect. I feel like once I get over myself, and gain some confidence, that I could take over the world. I feel I'm destined for absolute greatness and I feel like I have SOOOOO much potential is so many aspects of life, but I just need to realize that I am more than capable of doing so, and that I am good enough for anyone and anything.

-I've convinced myself that I am undesirable and I feel like it's manifesting itself in the real world

- I honestly don't know why I come back to this place. I literally hate a majority of you guys and most of you guys' ideologies, the way you guys think about things and your usage of the word "yambs" and anything else thats -ambs. I've really outgrown this place but I just keep coming back.

- I took a semester off last semester largely due to financial reasons and some **** I was going through and it was probably the best things I've ever done.

-I catch feelings WAY too easily and it troubles me

- I feel so weak. Especially mentally. I feel like I don't know how to defend myself.

-I decided to follow my passion and pursue a career in racing, or at the very least, professional driving. It has me soo excited about the future. I have every step mapped out. I just don't know how I'm going to afford to follow my dream.

-I'm so bored with everything. My music, going out and doing the usual with my friends and such. I want something different, something BIGGER. But I have no clue what that thing is or how to reach it.


All I can think of for now
 
- I'm really depressed even though I make pretty good money

- Loyal to the foil

- I drive two hours round trip to pick up cuz Oakland is grimey

- I was gonna write more but I keep nodding out at the keyboard smh
 

It seems, to me, that little girls do absorb quicker, they learn from observing whats going on around them(aka "grow folks business") faster. Then, between 15 through 18 years old.....its puberty....hormones....emotions. For a lot, if not, most females(there are exceptions to everything, of course), the observational learning just stops. Its like some girls just have to do in order to learn anything. You can tell them the secret of life, but they still have to do what feel is right.

As oppose do guys, the observational learning never stops. Then, there are exceptions to everything... 'ol ***** *** ***** that got to do and **** the game up for everybody...
 
18 year olds jus wanna get pounded

I see her every weekend because she plays soccer (big turn on) in the same fields I play in...she told me how her relationship of 3 years was bad and that she is tired of that and how she wishes to find a nice guy that's sweet, caring and that she is looking for something serious ...at this time I'm thinking wth is going on, is she coming at me?
this means she wants a ******* thats rugged, treats her like **** and wants to screw around, dont let these words fool you bruh
 
I think I'm afraid of commitment. Most of the marriages I've seen growing up didnt last. Most people that stayed married, don't look happy. Makes me feel like its not possible to be happily married.

As a result I feel relationships really aren't worth it.
 
I think I'm afraid of commitment. Most of the marriages I've seen growing up didnt last. Most people that stayed married, don't look happy. Makes me feel like its not possible to be happily married.

As a result I feel relationships really aren't worth it.

Me too, and I'm in a relationship now :{

----

I have "issues", I guess. I don't know what kind but I feel like a lot of the time, it's me against the world.

When people try to get close to me, I feel uncomfortable and just push em away.

I don't fear death but I fear living the rest of my life alone...
 
I do want to go to college but I'm not sure how I'll get my Bachelor's...

I don't want to join the military just to pay for my education. However, between my rent, car note, and car insurance...it's hard. Idk if I'll ever be a full time student because of that yet I don't want to take out a student loan.
 
18 year olds jus wanna get pounded

I see her every weekend because she plays soccer (big turn on) in the same fields I play in...she told me how her relationship of 3 years was bad and that she is tired of that and how she wishes to find a nice guy that's sweet, caring and that she is looking for something serious ...at this time I'm thinking wth is going on, is she coming at me?
this means she wants a ******* thats rugged, treats her like **** and wants to screw around, dont let these words fool you bruh

QFE.

i think i can get like 3 million on kickstarter if i say i wanna develop a female translation app.
 
I think I'm afraid of commitment. Most of the marriages I've seen growing up didnt last. Most people that stayed married, don't look happy. Makes me feel like its not possible to be happily married.
As a result I feel relationships really aren't worth it.
i wouldnt say that.  every couple is different.  I use to run through women before i met my wife.  We have been happily married for 2 years.  We argue once in a while but thats normal.  I'm not gonna lie I feel a hell of a lot better being married then i did when i was out running the streets with stupid women.
grin.gif
 
I do want to go to college but I'm not sure how I'll get my Bachelor's...
I don't want to join the military just to pay for my education. However, between my rent, car note, and car insurance...it's hard. Idk if I'll ever be a full time student because of that yet I don't want to take out a student loan.
 be patient.   theres no time table for how long you have to graduate by.   Start off just by taking 1 or 2 classes at a time.  You can even take a class or 2 then take the next semster off.  take your time.  I plan on going back and im 26.
 
- I'm really depressed even though I make pretty good money
- Loyal to the foil
- I drive two hours round trip to pick up cuz Oakland is grimey
- I was gonna write more but I keep nodding out at the keyboard smh

:{ be careful fam..
 
sleazyy man its too late. I don't even remember posting that.. Nice surprise this morning :{

Ima be alright but yall let me tell you... Stay away from drugs that can get you stuck esp painkillers. Never thought I'd touch tar. No one grows up thinking, I'm gonna mess with dope when I get older...
 
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