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Post your most embarrassing sexual encounters vol. 4
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so im at my girls house and we in her room doin the buis. her grandfather lives in the basement so she keep tellin me to relax. then a few minutes later sheclaims to hear a noice and wants to stop. im like nah its just ur old !+$ grandfather down stairs its nothn. next thing we know we hear a knock on her bedroomdoor its her moms and she yellin and +%!%. my car is outside so she knows im in there ( i wanted to dip out a window). after a while i man up and walk out theroom he mom is glaring me down bad. i felt awkward for months
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Originally Posted by DAYTONA 5000
yeah ok buddy
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Ight, so I got this chick that I met on the net over my crib for the second time, and it's always been a guarenteed smash every time she came over. Shewas my personal crash dummy. So we get to the crib and I start doin my usual, call moms and my sister to see where they at and what time they commin home foredoin the damn thang so I could save myself the embarrisment. Call moms and she's not comming home until 11:00PM and my sister is at my other sisters placeand she always stays over there late when she goes, so I had the green light.
So we commence the smash session and the clock is the least of my worries when I'm in der, (Had a chick who would always give me my smash times and statsafter we smashed like she was standing looking in 3rd person or sum... I never understood it. My bad for gettin off topic... I digress...) so I lost trackof time. All I know was that there was sunlight when we started and before I knew it, it was dark outside. Baby girl had some good gushy too. At the time, Ihad two twin beds pushed together as my "bed" and them joints were seperated like Pangea from the quake we was making. Oh boy... Chick is on top ofme laying forward with the derriere North and you know how when you know something unexpected is about to happen, everything goes in slow mo? Like whenyou're falling, you notice every single detail of the fall? Well, I heard her hand hit the door handle, heard the lil gears in the door moving, andI'm thinking to myself "this is about to be some embarrising $!%#!" I'm on my back and she's on top of me and were stairing at thedoor... Waiting, because there was really nothing we could do in time. Moms walks in, lets out some weird !%% shriek, turns around and slams the door. Ilook at the clock and it's like 11:33 or sum, and I felt low for like a split second.. Real low. But I was still in der so I forgot about it the nexthalf of that split second and the smashing commenced. Evidently the chick wasnt even embarrised because all she said was "OMG, are you in trouble?!" and I was like "@$%# !+#%%!?!?!?!?!?!?" and kept going... What a pro she was... My phone rang, and I knew it was my mom, but I ignored it
I got like 3 missed calls and a voice mail from mom. At this point I'm back down on earth and I'm feeling like "That was some disrespectful !%%$!%#!
So we walk out my room so I can take her home, and I'm peepin out the door and around corners like Solid Snake and $!%# so there wouldnt be any akwardrun-ins with mom on the way out... Coast is clear and we walk out to the car and I make my way to the kitchen to grab some chicken mom whipped up while I wassmashin(My appetite is insane after a good session, so that was ON POINT!). I drove her home, and came home and went to bed. The next day was like any otherday. Mom didnt even mention it, but I had to appologise. She was real cool about it. Cool my ftw!
Cliffnotes:
-Bring home a crash dummy
-Call to see if the coast is clear before I make my moves
-We do with crash dummys are built for
-I loose track of time
-Mom walks in on us with crash dummys buttocks North
-Girls thang thang got me in a trance and we keep smashing after moms walks in
-I get a voice mail from moms and I check it 30 mins later after smashing
-The voice mail was just moms saying she maid some chicken and it's downstairs on the stove
-Appologised to mom and went on with my life
-Cool moms ftw!
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^ Awesome story
" I made you some chicken", she musta known you'd be hungry
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thread is pure comedy
Socal_pt
formerly chabbbboi23
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these stories got me
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2nd time actually smashing, her parents came on into it. I was just getting into too. It was a long train ride home from the Bronx. I just sat in the twoseater in the corner, curled up in a ball, with the worst case of blue balls I ever had.
When I got home I stripped naked and got on all 4's so my balls would just dangle. They hurt that bad.
When I got home I stripped naked and got on all 4's so my balls would just dangle. They hurt that bad.
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AYO what the hell
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Originally Posted by JayADiCt92
AYO what the hell
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airmaxpenny1 wrote:
When I got home I stripped naked and got on all 4's so my balls would just dangle. They hurt that bad.
That is the most AYO comment I have ever hear on NT
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Crumbs wrote:
not as embarrassing as it is funny but anyhow:
i belive senior yr in highschool im getting it in with shorty at the time...we were in my room..parents home sometime in the afternoon ... one of my boys at the time had a tendency of coming over un-announced ...my old apt had no lock on the door so ...boy shows up ..moms open the door...i hear that familiar voice heading over...im almost at that point like #!* %*+! this ...dude straight burst in i jump off cover the chick and ...my gun goes off...ends up missing him by some inches ..he screams "oh #!*" runs out and my door was fully shot up ...
i was mad at the time...but after a bit was rolling for the attempted friendly fire
ROTFL
My sophomore year I had met one of the locals at a Kappa party. Pretty VA chick with the softest skin and lips. When I get her clothes off...I was thinkingI'm bout to tear this #@#!% up.I get in and its SO warm and soft.She gets to moaning like I ain't never heard before. I must have got like 4-5 strokes in before I let goWhen I pulled out she was on some why what happened...all I could say was oh Ididn't want to hurt you. LMAO that %$#$ still keeps me rolling.
I had one of the bad stench anal experiences too. Same year same apartment as above. I had a chick from Cali that just loved me (that Chi swag is a mofo) and came whenever I called her name. After getting sucked off I try toget some of that brown eye. When I spread them cheeks...the worst smells came from her dookie shoot. That %$#$ was like evil ghosts or some %$#$.I never tried that with her again!
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Originally Posted by AntBanks81
Crumbs wrote:
i was mad at the time...but after a bit was rolling for the attempted friendly fire
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These storys are
1. like 3 years ago , I had this one chick that would meet me at work ( I worked Security 3-11 shift near central partk south ) and she would come thru afterschool to hang out, ... I had alot of freedom at work at the time so I would just take her to Central to talk. 1 day though we were really feeling it and Iwanted to smash badly , so we climb this little rock formation thats around 6th ave. I dont see a soul around atleast I think so , and I start smashing Raw.... it was so gushy I couldnt help myself ...I didnt last more than 5 min. , Now she starts doming me up and I start playing wit her trying to get back up butits not working , so we decide to put our cloths back on.... I then look in the bushs , there must of been like 3 homeless people LURKIN
all up in it while I was smashing .... they all broke out on some foot soildertype steez ( NINJA VANISH ) ... needless to say I was embarrassed .... but the shorty didnt give a damn she started laughing
, for moments like that Ima miss that Jump I swear
.
2. Same chick I decided to go anal in my crib 1 day. Im in it dong my thing , it was so so tight .... and she's moaning really into it , then all I hear isOH #$*% ! she gets up quick and runs to the bathroom ... I looked down and I had everything she ate that day on me
... damn that was disgusting , needless to say I cleaned up and went in again butdidnt take the back exit this time ... and I have that episode all on video
1. like 3 years ago , I had this one chick that would meet me at work ( I worked Security 3-11 shift near central partk south ) and she would come thru afterschool to hang out, ... I had alot of freedom at work at the time so I would just take her to Central to talk. 1 day though we were really feeling it and Iwanted to smash badly , so we climb this little rock formation thats around 6th ave. I dont see a soul around atleast I think so , and I start smashing Raw.... it was so gushy I couldnt help myself ...I didnt last more than 5 min. , Now she starts doming me up and I start playing wit her trying to get back up butits not working , so we decide to put our cloths back on.... I then look in the bushs , there must of been like 3 homeless people LURKIN
2. Same chick I decided to go anal in my crib 1 day. Im in it dong my thing , it was so so tight .... and she's moaning really into it , then all I hear isOH #$*% ! she gets up quick and runs to the bathroom ... I looked down and I had everything she ate that day on me
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I was with my ex at the time and we drove up to a local mountain where u can stay in your car and see tho whole city. There are a few houses scattered up therebut for the most part it's always empty. So its 1 in the morning and we're up there smashing for about 10 minutes when I decide to put the windows downcuz of the heat. 2 minutes later I look up and see some weird %#* mofo just staring at us standing like 2 feet away from my car. I was so into though that Ididn't give a *@*$, After a while I started stroking very slowly cuz that %$!$ was buggin me so my ex asked what was going on (she was on her back socouldn't see %$!$). I tell her nothings wrong (she woulda freaked out) and just said %%%@ it and kept going. That fool just threw me a thumbs up andstarted to walk away. I have no idea what he was doing up there at 1 in the morning walking around but that %$!$ tripped me out.
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yo, these stories got me crackin up in class.
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Originally Posted by thinkinFRESH
2. Same chick I decided to go anal in my crib 1 day. Im in it dong my thing , it was so so tight .... and she's moaning really into it , then all I hear is OH #$*% ! she gets up quick and runs to the bathroom ... I looked down and I had everything she ate that day on me... damn that was disgusting , needless to say I cleaned up and went in again but didnt take the back exit this time ... and I have that episode all on video
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This thread delivers.
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Originally Posted by AntBanks81
That *%*% was like evil ghosts or some *%*%.
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alright well... think it was sophmore year, summer time. me and the ex had no place on campus at the time so couldn't ever get it on. decide to hit up thearmory on campus (won't say which school
) find an empty classroom, push a heavy !@$ projector in front of the door. building was ghost so we weregood. start getting domed up. all of a sudden i hear the projector stand sounding like nails on a chalkboard. i threw her off me so fast, run for my drawls.the door shut but i got outta there so fast, never again in public.
