I don't usually do this, but a GIRL thread Vol: Prego

[j dilla himself]

Originally Posted by undefinedinc

Originally Posted by M1dnightMobster

Originally Posted by champ305

I dislike abortions, but I respect your unselfish reasons why you don't want a child yet.

OP is being more than selfish. Sure, OP, you can front all you want and talk about how you're not ready for a child - which is true - but you took the chance of havin sex outside of marriage without a condom and got her pregnant. The real unselfish reason would be to man up and take care of her and the child.

I agree with this, dude is being everything BUT unselfish. I understand the concern about having a child young but he is not being considerate of the other person's feelings and what she is going through. I hope everything works out for you OP.

what other persons feelings? Who? What about the potential child's feelings? What part of "not ready" dont you understand? You are selfish and apathetic human to have a baby you cant take care of 100%. ..have a seat

 

[undefinedinc]

Originally Posted by J Dilla Himself

Originally Posted by undefinedinc

Originally Posted by M1dnightMobster

Originally Posted by champ305

I dislike abortions, but I respect your unselfish reasons why you don't want a child yet.

OP is being more than selfish. Sure, OP, you can front all you want and talk about how you're not ready for a child - which is true - but you took the chance of havin sex outside of marriage without a condom and got her pregnant. The real unselfish reason would be to man up and take care of her and the child.

I agree with this, dude is being everything BUT unselfish. I understand the concern about having a child young but he is not being considerate of the other person's feelings and what she is going through. I hope everything works out for you OP.

what other persons feelings? Who? What about the potential child's feelings? What part of "not ready" dont you understand? You are selfish and a pathetic human to have a baby you cant take care of 100%. ..have a seat

I would respond to you but I can't take "The mayor" aka the full time internet troll serious. Sorry my dude, I can't haveintelligent conversations with clowns. Go stalk Wale so more or something


P.S. Don't call the OP a selfish and pathetic human my dude thats not called for, your not talking about me because I can take care of my child.

 

[chokeonsmoke]

try not to take what she says too serious
and one more thing dont listen to these lames
on here all they gonna do is talk $#%%
do what you think is right and it will all be good...

 

[essential1]

Originally Posted by Tinchy Stryder

Man..I Impregnated a chick before. I'm against abortion, but if I have to do it..i'll do it.

Abortion is not an option, though. So..I just deleted that chicks FB, twitter, and phone number..haven't spoken to her in like 14 months.

What are you like 13? Everything about you so far on Niketalk is child like behavior.

 

[j dilla himself]

Originally Posted by undefinedinc

Originally Posted by J Dilla Himself

Originally Posted by undefinedinc

Originally Posted by M1dnightMobster

Originally Posted by champ305

I dislike abortions, but I respect your unselfish reasons why you don't want a child yet.

OP is being more than selfish. Sure, OP, you can front all you want and talk about how you're not ready for a child - which is true - but you took the chance of havin sex outside of marriage without a condom and got her pregnant. The real unselfish reason would be to man up and take care of her and the child.

I agree with this, dude is being everything BUT unselfish. I understand the concern about having a child young but he is not being considerate of the other person's feelings and what she is going through. I hope everything works out for you OP.

what other persons feelings? Who? What about the potential child's feelings? What part of "not ready" dont you understand? You are selfish and a pathetic human to have a baby you cant take care of 100%. ..have a seat

I would respond to you but I can't take "The mayor" aka the full time internet troll serious. Sorry my dude, I can't have intelligent conversations with clowns. Go stalk Wale so more or something


P.S. Don't call the OP a selfish and pathetic human my dude thats not called for, your not talking about me because I can take care of my child.

that is your excuse. i don't even think you're capable of having an intelligent conversation regardless of who its with. good day,though

btw, i was speaking in general..for both mothers and fathers who decide to have a baby knowing they dont have the funds nor the responsibility

 

[flipnkraut]

"I kissed you on the cheek
"Good night my love" I say
You turned to me and smile
"A baby's on the way."

And then you drift asleep
To dream of life anew
And I lie wondering
Just what I should do

I could kick you in the stomach
And catch you unawares
I could swear to God you accidently
Fell that flight of stairs

When I tell you that I love you
I will look you in the eye
As I slowly slide the hanger up your thigh."

 

[seymore cake]

Originally Posted by VaGixxer

Originally Posted by KatieJade4

A woman becomes a mother when she's pregnant. A man becomes a father when he holds the baby for the first time.

Once your girl has the baby and you see it and hold it. You're going to feel a completely different way.

Pretty much.

I've been in your position before, my daughter is now about to be 8 months.

You need to start being honest and telling the truth. All the "I don't know" "this is so hard" etc. Talking like that your on your way to being a father.

This. I've been where you are 1st time I was 19 freshman in college listening to my then girl telling me not to stop and we would get the planned b...

... Went through all that emotional conflict you're going through and while I felt I was wrong morally I felt it was the logical decision not to have thechild and voiced that. I went with her sat there watching all of the females in there go through it and come out like zombies and it was one of thee mostemotionally/mentally horrific trying things I've ever had to endure. But you know what... It was the best decision for US. The 2nd time I was 25 and Istill felt as though I wasn't ready but I couldn't bring myself to tell my current fiance to do it I just left the ball in her court saying that Iwould be supportive either way she played it... sure enough 6 1/2 months later I was holding my little girl and everything in my life was different and Ican't imagine life any other way now.

So regardless of how it plays out, if you feel as though now is not the time you need to make that known regardless of how wrong anyone may make you feel,yourself included and believe me you will feel like @%!! for it as well. Good Luck Bro.

 

[thytkerjobs]

Originally Posted by Nawth21

Originally Posted by M1dnightMobster

Originally Posted by champ305

I dislike abortions, but I respect your unselfish reasons why you don't want a child yet.

OP is being more than selfish. Sure, OP, you can front all you want and talk about how you're not ready for a child - which is true - but you took the chance of havin sex outside of marriage without a condom and got her pregnant. The real unselfish thing to do would be to man up and take care of her and the child.

I'm married, still wouldn't be able to support a child and would elect to have the abortion. Marriage doesn't make things magically OK. The bottom line is that the woman is the one who can get pregnant, not the man, so at the end of the day it is MY responsibility to make sure that doesn't happen and if it does happen then it's my responsibility to handle it in whatever manner that may be.

nawth always spits real *#*@
personally i wouldn't want a baby outside of marriage, but im not having kids as soon as im married either just for the hell of it. stability = kids.Suppose OP's son/daughter has medical problems that require thousands of dollars a month? You gotta take EVERYTHING into consideration.

 

[essential1]

OP maybe explain your positioning,


I am pro-choice (btw anti-abortion =/= pro life, just like pro choice/abortion =/= anti-life..) Stop calling yourself pro-life it is not the correct term. Itis anti-abortion.

Anyway back to this. I think most people are assuming this guy is trying to leave her high and dry. He just said he told her w/e she chooses he will stand byher. He said he wants to have a kid with her, just it is not the right time. That he wants to be fully ready to give his child the best life possible. Not thelife he has to have because his means of providing is slim.

OP the advise to you is to actually tell her how you feel about her,and if you truly do love her tell her what you see from your point of view. Don't becondescending, or act like you have it all figured out. Show her you truly are scarred..

But as you have outlined. You say you feel strongly about her, and you guys planned to have a kid at some point. All I can do is give you what I would do, andin this case I think I would keep it.

But it is not my place (NOR ANYONE ON HERE) to tell you what YOU SHOULD DO.. Gotta be real about yourself. And take responsibility but also take reality

 

[chokeonsmoke]

look op the best advice i can give you is to not come on here and tell your buidness
i know how it feels you tryna look for the answer and you turn to other people
but that aint gunna work, your only gonna get dudes that think they know everything
but they dont...you gotta take care of your buisness now
i aint gon lie i was in your same position...felt anger and regrett like never before and it changed me
now im ready to handle my buisness whether i like it or not
tomorrow they inducing my girls baby, and ima be right next to her when it happens...so good luck

 

[duke4005]

You didn't know the consequences of having sex? Come on, OP, you were "adult" enough to get it but not adult enough to know what could happen,right? If you are waiting to be "financially comfortable", you may never have a kid. Who knows what job or career your future holds? You may digditches the rest of your life or hit the Lotto, and you still may not be "comfortable" either way. Just saying, if you want to be able to do what isbest for the kid, you have it, love it, raise it either together or apart, and teach it the right way to live and act. You say in a few years you will be readyand have another baby; some abortions can medically make women sterile. Then if not, that next child is going to get older, ask questions, or maybe some familymember on either side slips (like they did to my wife) and tells the new kid that they could have had an older sibling. Explain that. Whether you think you areready or not, once that first cry comes, you figure it out. In your responses you sound fairly mature and considerate of all answers, so I would bet you wouldbe great if you could just get over the fear of failing. I am telling you, if love is given, all will be good.

 

[octobersfinest]

I can't believe people are still saying stuff like "you were adult enough to have sex, you are adult enough to deal with the consequences."It's 2010, if you can't get off your high horse, even on the internet, I'm glad I don't know you in person.

 

[duke4005]

Originally Posted by J Dilla Himself

Originally Posted by undefinedinc

Originally Posted by M1dnightMobster

Originally Posted by champ305

I dislike abortions, but I respect your unselfish reasons why you don't want a child yet.

OP is being more than selfish. Sure, OP, you can front all you want and talk about how you're not ready for a child - which is true - but you took the chance of havin sex outside of marriage without a condom and got her pregnant. The real unselfish reason would be to man up and take care of her and the child.

I agree with this, dude is being everything BUT unselfish. I understand the concern about having a child young but he is not being considerate of the other person's feelings and what she is going through. I hope everything works out for you OP.

what other persons feelings? Who? What about the potential child's feelings? What part of "not ready" dont you understand? You are selfish and a pathetic human to have a baby you cant take care of 100% have sex when you aren't ready for a kid. ..have a seat

Fixed

 

[duke4005]

Originally Posted by OctobersFinest

I can't believe people are still saying stuff like "you were adult enough to have sex, you are adult enough to deal with the consequences." It's 2010, if you can't get off your high horse, even on the internet, I'm glad I don't know you in person.

Why is that a high horse? Because I am man enough to deal with the consequences of my actions and not take the easy way out? It is 2010, let's quitmurdering babies who have no chance at life. Your right, you are probably glad you don't know me.

 

[octobersfinest]

Originally Posted by duke4005

Originally Posted by OctobersFinest

I can't believe people are still saying stuff like "you were adult enough to have sex, you are adult enough to deal with the consequences." It's 2010, if you can't get off your high horse, even on the internet, I'm glad I don't know you in person.

Why is that a high horse? Because I am man enough to deal with the consequences of my actions and not take the easy way out? It is 2010, let's quit murdering babies who have no chance at life. Your right, you are probably glad you don't know me.

You're telling me you've only had sex with women that you are 100% ready to have a child with??

And murder is illegal, let's quit replacing the word murder with abortion. You sound stupid.

 

[skill jonez]

OP, when in doubt..........Give her a FALCON PUNCH to the midsection!

 

[nawth21]

at thinking abortion or even adoption is the easy way out. Grow a uterus and get back to me

 

[j dilla himself]

Originally Posted by duke4005

Originally Posted by J Dilla Himself

Originally Posted by undefinedinc

Originally Posted by M1dnightMobster

Originally Posted by champ305

I dislike abortions, but I respect your unselfish reasons why you don't want a child yet.

OP is being more than selfish. Sure, OP, you can front all you want and talk about how you're not ready for a child - which is true - but you took the chance of havin sex outside of marriage without a condom and got her pregnant. The real unselfish reason would be to man up and take care of her and the child.

I agree with this, dude is being everything BUT unselfish. I understand the concern about having a child young but he is not being considerate of the other person's feelings and what she is going through. I hope everything works out for you OP.

what other persons feelings? Who? What about the potential child's feelings? What part of "not ready" dont you understand? You are selfish and a pathetic human to have a baby you cant take care of 100% have sex when you aren't ready for a kid. ..have a seat

Fixed

*looks at sig*...*looks at avy..duke fan*
oh ok, i see why you're not making any sense..carry on

 

[deuce king]

My question is am I really such a bad dude for not wanting to have a baby yet?

No your not a bad guy at all. You're actually honest enough to know that you and your girl quite possibly aren't ready to raise a child. There'sno need to put the horse before the carriage as they say. Like others have said, tell your girl how you feel and how this decision will effect both of you.

man enough to do it be man enough to take care of it IMO

You couldn't be more wrong. Evertime you have sex doesn't mean you want to end up having a baby.

 

[duke4005]

Originally Posted by OctobersFinest

Originally Posted by duke4005

Originally Posted by OctobersFinest

I can't believe people are still saying stuff like "you were adult enough to have sex, you are adult enough to deal with the consequences." It's 2010, if you can't get off your high horse, even on the internet, I'm glad I don't know you in person.

Why is that a high horse? Because I am man enough to deal with the consequences of my actions and not take the easy way out? It is 2010, let's quit murdering babies who have no chance at life. Your right, you are probably glad you don't know me.

You're telling me you've only had sex with women that you are 100% ready to have a child with??

Nope, not at all. Just saying, I had 2 scares, and in both of those I was ready to take responsibility for my actions. For real discussion, this is what iswrong with kids having sex too early. They aren't ready for what could happen. I know the OP is 21, but with all of us beginning in our early teens, orsome even earlier, it makes it easier to desensitize us to the consequences later when something does happen. We just think, no problem, abortion, get it overwith. It is rarely that easy. Like Seymore said, it messes you up, male and female, physically, emotionally, and kills alot of relationships. Granted, havingthe kid could also do the same thing, but we as parents (or adults at least) have to be grow up, maybe early, and try to deal.

As far as abortion not equaling murder, I guess once you have kids you see it different, but if you can honestly look at a baby, right out of the womb, andtell me that was not a human 15 seconds before because it was still inside, then the only stupidity I see is on the other end of this post.

Nawth, I didn't mean easy for the woman. Furthest thing from it. I am sorry it came across that way. I meant it is easy for the guy to just say go get theabortion instead of manning up. Sorry for the confusion.

 

[seymore cake]

Originally Posted by Nawth21

at thinking abortion or even adoption is the easy way out. Grow a uterus and get back to me

Mogs talk out of their hind parts so much that all you can do is

half the time

 

[essential1]

Originally Posted by Deuce King

man enough to do it be man enough to take care of it IMO

You couldn't be more wrong. Evertime you have sex doesn't mean you want to end up having a baby.
It is like saying if you get in a fist fight and end up getting killed. And someone comes up and says well he knew the possible outcome.

A lot of people are on there high horse when it comes to these kinds of debates like the person who said a couple of posts before me.

 

[octobersfinest]

Originally Posted by duke4005

Originally Posted by OctobersFinest

Originally Posted by duke4005

Originally Posted by OctobersFinest

I can't believe people are still saying stuff like "you were adult enough to have sex, you are adult enough to deal with the consequences." It's 2010, if you can't get off your high horse, even on the internet, I'm glad I don't know you in person.

Why is that a high horse? Because I am man enough to deal with the consequences of my actions and not take the easy way out? It is 2010, let's quit murdering babies who have no chance at life. Your right, you are probably glad you don't know me.

You're telling me you've only had sex with women that you are 100% ready to have a child with??

Nope, not at all. Just saying, I had 2 scares, and in both of those I was ready to take responsibility for my actions. For real discussion, this is what is wrong with kids having sex too early. They aren't ready for what could happen. I know the OP is 21, but with all of us beginning in our early teens, or some even earlier, it makes it easier to desensitize us to the consequences later when something does happen. We just think, no problem, abortion, get it over with. It is rarely that easy. Like Seymore said, it messes you up, male and female, physically, emotionally, and kills alot of relationships. Granted, having the kid could also do the same thing, but we as parents (or adults at least) have to be grow up, maybe early, and try to deal.

Dude just asked if was a bad person for not wanting a kid so early. That's how he feels. That's how I immediately felt when my girl found out. Butyou grow up. Teenagers having sex, in my opinion, is a completely different discussion.

BTW, what happened in the 2 scares you had?

 

[manny1]

OP

I made my girl have an abortion once when she wanted to keep it but at the time I didn't want another kid because I had two already. OP don't make herdo that and man up because trust me you don't want to know how it feels not knowing what you could of have and the life you could of gave that kid. Iregret it every day now that I made my girl do that and the funny thing about it is now that I want another kid she doesn't want anymore. If only I can getmy girl to want another baby I would jump on it in a heartbeat. Don't see it as a bad thing but as a blessing. Just my 2 cents.

 

[throwback1718]

I am taking all of your opinions.
I understand where both the people who say don't abort and step up to the plate are coming from and I understand where everyone else is coming from.

I really never thought of it as being selfish.
I was so busy thinking of her JUST starting a new job at the beginning of the week, something I'm happy about, I didn't want her to jepordize the job,and she was also in progress to start school... She's always told me from even before this situation that she's not going to work after she has a baby,atleast for a while, because she doesn't want to leave the baby with a sitter or anyone other than family.
That in itself made me feel the pressure automatically.

I WILL admit, I'm not mature enough to have and deal with a seed.
I know an abortion is something that she has to go through herself and its not easy.

I just personally feel that if she REALLY, REALLY didn't want an abortion, why say, anything other than that? Why go on saying (what seemed sincere)"I wouldnt force the baby on you if you arent ready."
If she was going to flip out when I walked through the door she opened?

Why not from the jump say "yo im going to keep it, no ifs ands or buts about it" she KNOWS that I would have manned up to it and did my duty and NOTforce her to do anything she didn't want to.