I came on too strong. Vol. Girl problems

[snake201]

Two saturdays ago at a local bar in my college town I ended up picking up this girl and taking her back to her place. We actually ended up connecting on a lot of things and eventually we had sex. I spent the night at her place and when we woke up had morning sex. We then we to lunch and then she took me back to my place. During the time we spent together we talked a lot and had a lot of similarities and we totally hit it off. To my demises, after getting my home I texted her and we talked a lot over txt messages. I then asked her out on a date the following Wednesday. At the date everything continued to go smooth and I felt as if she was feeling me too. After dinner we went our separate ways and I messaged her an hour later saying "I really enjoyed dinner and I hope you did too". Well she didn't write back until the next day and pretty much hit me up with the she doesn't want anything at the moment blah blah and deleted me off facebook. So pretty much I came on too strong and creeped her out.

Now from you guys here with experience what do you suggest I do? After she hit me up with that message I said I understand if you don't want anything at the moment and pretty much all is well. Since last thursday I have not messaged her back up and I've seen her on campus two times and neither of us has said anything to each other.


I just got off a 18 month relationship, so my game after picking up chicks at the bar and having sex with them is weak. But I know this is NT so here is a pic of her.

 

[chichiloves5s]

Keep it moving.

 

[mmg]

White girl

You ****** up

 

[cj863]

This is how you start girl problem threads gentlemen, with pics. Good job OP.

Seems like you already know the deal though. You were looking for more, she was looking for straight up sex. Keep it moving, there's really nothing else to do. It does seem like you were doing too much so learn from your mistakes. With the next girl you're interested in building with take some time don't rush into things.

 

[snake201]

Keep it moving.

See this is what conventional wisdom tells me to do. But after being around many girls in school I feel as if this one is different.

 

[krazy88s]

"Ladies is pimps too"

Maybe ya pipe game is wack. Or maybe she used you for sex. Either way, keep it moving.

 

[mmg]

You from Jersey OP? If so lemme borrow her

 

[snake201]

This is how you start girl problem threads gentlemen, with pics. Good job OP.
Seems like you already know the deal though. You were looking for more, she was looking for straight up sex. Keep it moving, there's really nothing else to do. It does seem like you were doing too much so learn from your mistakes. With the next girl you're interested in building with take some time don't rush into things.

I've on NT for a while so it's pics or no help. But yeah live and you learn. I don't think she was looking for straight up sex. The whole night she was talking about how she didn't expect the night to turn out the way it did. I.e. She just went out with her friends to get some drinks and never expected to me an awesome guy that was going places. I on the other hand was looking to get laid, hit it and quit it, but ended up meeting an awesome girl I blew it with haha.

"Ladies is pimps too"
Maybe ya pipe game is wack. Or maybe she used you for sex. Either way, keep it moving.

See above.

You from Jersey OP? If so lemme borrow her

No sir, North Carolina.

 

[jking0821]

OP you messed up.

Girl says I am not looking for anything right now.....you respond with "Neither am I"

She obviously doesn't want a relationship but if played right....you can keep smashing. Keep playing the i just want to have fun its college I am not looking for anything serious blah blah blah (even though its a lie). Then she thinks the just sex thing is cool. Since neither of you is looking for anything. Then you smash....while realizing she will never date you. Which means go look for a gf and cut her off once you find it

edit based on your response: if you follow above maybe she will come around and you can actually make it into something

 

[kareem the dream]

Sounds like you got alil greedy OP. After that morning sex, i wouldve felt content. Shouldve let her put some work in.

The "I had a great time, hope you did too" seems abit much for YOU to say if ya were connecting like you said..

But its not all bad, you smashed.. keep it movin

 

[tr1ll]

After dinner we went our separate ways and I messaged her an hour later saying "I really enjoyed dinner and I hope you did too".

I feel like this is where you went wrong. If she gave it to you the first night, she wasn't looking for a good guy. That text made it seem like you were trying to be that guy.

 

[gangsta grillz]

you smashed twice within 12 hours of meeting her and you tryna wife that dawg??

remove your cape OP

why would you even add her on facebook??

too thirsty son

 

[jesusshuttlesworth34]

Square peg doesn't fit into a round hole.


Don't make it more than what it is. Enjoy the moment, nobody wants to go from one night stand to full fledged relationship in a matter of days. Breathe homie and let things be.

 

[omgitswes]

You live and you learn. Happened to me plenty of times.

Go out there and try again bro

 

[snake201]

OP you messed up.
Girl says I am not looking for anything right now.....you respond with "Neither am I"
She obviously doesn't want a relationship but if played right....you can keep smashing. Keep playing the i just want to have fun its college I am not looking for anything serious blah blah blah (even though its a lie). Then she thinks the just sex thing is cool. Since neither of you is looking for anything. Then you smash....while realizing she will never date you. Which means go look for a gf and cut her off once you find it
edit based on your response: if you follow above maybe she will come around and you can actually make it into something

Yeah, I just don't know how I should do it. We are both in grad school and mature. How do you guys feel if I write her a hand written note and say " I'm sorry for coming off too strong and getting a bit ahead of myself" ? And then see what she says from there.

Sounds like you got alil greedy OP. After that morning sex, i wouldve felt content. Shouldve let her put some work in.
The "I had a great time, hope you did too" seems abit much for YOU to say if ya were connecting like you said..
But its not all bad, you smashed.. keep it movin

I did get a little greedy and def came off to strong. Hindsight is 20/20, the JO I smashed the night before which I didn't care for at all now won't stop hitting me up haha.

 

[da shoefreak]

girl problems?

you dont have any girl problems

 

[snake201]

I feel like this is where you went wrong. If she gave it to you the first night, she wasn't looking for a good guy. That text made it seem like you were trying to be that guy.

Yeah I def went wrong with that txt and the minute I sent it and didn't get a reply back in the usual time frame I knew I messed up.

you smashed twice within 12 hours of meeting her and you tryna wife that dawg??

remove your cape OP



why would you even add her on facebook??
too thirsty son

She actually added me on facebook first and not only that but one of her friends from the school she went to undergrad added me too. I asked her why friend added me and she said she talked about me to her friend and her friend was being a creeper and that I didn't have to add her if I didn't want to lol. I guess she must have said good times or else why would her friend add me too?

Square peg doesn't fit into a round hole.
Don't make it more than what it is. Enjoy the moment, nobody wants to go from one night stand to full fledged relationship in a matter of days. Breathe homie and let things be.

Yeah I learned my lesson fam.

You live and you learn. Happened to me plenty of times.
Go out there and try again bro

Thanks bro

 

[gangsta grillz]

dude is trollin...op aint smash nothin

what type of dude write letters to *******

 

[omgitswes]

Yeah, I just don't know how I should do it. We are both in grad school and mature. How do you guys feel if I write her a hand written note and say " I'm sorry for coming off too strong and getting a bit ahead of myself" ? And then see what she says from there.

You seem like you're really interested in this girl.

Me personally I wouldn't do that at all, I'll just take the L and keep it moving.
But since you seem to like her a lot, go for it. I mean what else do you have to lose? Unless you live in a small town and she tells every girl that you're a creeper.

 

[illwill8710]

"She don't want a man, she just wanna ****" - Curren$y

"Getting way too into the grip of the vagina lips
Got homies searching for relationships
She not tryna hear my type of *****" - Curren$y

move on OP

 

[jesusshuttlesworth34]

If you are seriously contemplating writing her a hand written note then you haven't learned, but there is still hope.


Don't be that dude......don't do it. You are in college, no need to simp and be the dude taking her out all day while someone is blowing her back out behind the dining hall.

 

[Gill Baka Esq. LLC.]

OP don't eem worry about it. You smashed and gave this girl the business and even more. Her loss.

Keep it moving, don't let it phase you. You seem to be pretty sprung right now and it's understandable. The girl in the pic is way better than the beasts some of these other dudes slay.

See we're caught up in "girl feelings" when we think we came off too strong. You came off like you know how to treat a girl. It would have been thirsty of you if you kept texting her and sweating her. Just fall back. If she ever texts you again just politely tell her to get to the point (either she wants to hang out where you can put down some game, or she's using you for something like attention while you get nothing in return).

Experience and mistakes are great masters.

 

[snake201]

girl problems? you dont have any girl problems

How is that not a girl problem bro? lol

^^ NO! You do NOT let her know that you came on too strong. That's creepy as f*** and she'll know that you're desperate since you're trying to "fix" something. She knows she's a JO. Just hit her with a text like "Wyd tonight? Let's hook up and chill out." Get some of that medication and put in work. You shouldn't want to wife that though, she's easy mane. Those are the chicks you schmang, not tame.

See thats the thing man, I have gotten with plenty of jump offs that I know from day one I could never see my self with them. But this girl is different man, really smart, great family that all went to college not your typical JO. And like I said earlier she was just blown away by how charming and a gentleman I was.

 

[snake201]

OP don't eem worry about it. You smashed and gave this girl the business and even more. Her loss.
Keep it moving, don't let it phase you. You seem to be pretty sprung right now and it's understandable. The girl in the pic is way better than the beasts some of these other dudes slay.
See we're caught up in "girl feelings" when we think we came off too strong. You came off like you know how to treat a girl. It would have been thirsty of you if you kept texting her and sweating her. Just fall back. If she ever texts you again just politely tell her to get to the point (either she wants to hang out where you can put down some game, or she's using you for something like attention while you get nothing in return).
Experience and mistakes are great masters.

You speak the truth, thanks for the advice. Moving on and putting this in the past is what is going to be. Yeah I guess you could say I am sprung haha. But that is one thing I def did, I treated her well. When a girl is JO she gets treated like one. But in my mind this girl was far from it and thats where I slipped up. I treated her way too nice. Our school is not small at all but as grad students I know I will run in to her sometime and hopefully something happens then. Till then off to next jump off.

 

[airthompson]

Yea bro we all went thru that. Happened to most of us. Girl meets girl, it's all physical, but then someone catches feeling and scares either the boy/girl away. It's not u OP. she just prolly dnt wanna be tied down.