Do you ever feel like a shell of your former self?

[unsuited]

Ima complete failure, I have no drive and lost all confidence due to scars and bad skin. It feels bad, I don't think I will ever be the same,and I'm only 20 man. I don't do anything in life.

well, if you are not doing anything about it, nothings is going to change.

 

[elcatfisho]

Never thought I was a shell of my former self, over the year I started believing that I can't do this or that. So I know that I can't just sit around and do nothing while other people are going about their business.

I made a list of goals I want to achieve in terms of career, student, and person. These are all things I either don't have or want to accomplish. Maybe you could try finding achievable goals and actually communicate back to yourself what and who you want to be and how you are going to accomplish it.

 

[ruxxx]

How old are you? What do you like? ( very broad for a reason. could be sports, the moon, plastic forks, anything, name it. )

27 (28 on monday).

I'm pretty much a record collector/music fanatic/beatsmith (when i'm in the mood).

I haven't hit the lanes in a little over a decade but i'm a pretty good bowler too. I'm sort of itching to get back to it.

 

[goste187]

I can't say I feel like a shell of my former self. I would say more like an evolved version of my former self. Back in my real early 20's (20-23) I had some crazy times. A lot of fun and partying but thankfully I was able to go through all that relatively unscathed. Now at 27, almost 28, I look back at those times for what they were. A lot of fun, but a ton of wreckless behavior too. I much prefer to be at my current state, and actually looked forward to when I'm slightly older and more settled in life. Getting older FTW in my book.

 

[Trillmatic90]

I messes with this heavy. Props.

But OP: Any reason at all why you might be depressed?

I dont know man. I feel like I slowly just started losing that charisma that I used to have. Like I used to be the type of guy that would say "let's go look for some chicks," cause I had confidence flowing through my veins. Now I look at myself and wonder where and how that confidence dissappeared. My bad if I'm not being clear

Ima complete failure, I have no drive and lost all confidence due to scars and bad skin. It feels bad, I don't think I will ever be the same,and I'm only 20 man. I don't do anything in life.

Son, you havent even begun life. You're only 20 so you have a longggg way to go before you call yourself a failure. Get an education and pursue a career in something you would take pride in. As for appearance, you're not the only one who feels insecure about bad skin. Go to a beauty shop or even the body care section in a walmart and a broad who works there will be thrilled to help you find some products that will help your skin.

27 (28 on monday).

I'm pretty much a record collector/music fanatic/beatsmith (when i'm in the mood).

I haven't hit the lanes in a little over a decade but i'm a pretty good bowler too. I'm sort of itching to get back to it.

Music has a way of soothing the soul man so I can see why you have a passion for it. Dont let your passion for music and collecting die. Try to get back into bowling as well cause that might be what you need right now. The way I see it is our passions are our truest friends. They dont judge you, they're always there and they always make you feel good about yourself.

 

[ruxxx]

Music has a way of soothing the soul man so I can see why you have a passion for it. Dont let your passion for music and collecting die. Try to get back into bowling as well cause that might be what you need right now. The way I see it is our passions are our truest friends. They dont judge you, they're always there and they always make you feel good about yourself.

Appreciate the words brother.

 

[deleted]

I feel like a shell of my future self.

 

[thadocta]

I feel like a shell of my future self.

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[beezylocks]

Things could get boring for some people.
Maybe you need a change of scenery with new people in your life...

Also, now that you're older, you probably have more responsibilities and things like that. So, that could put a damper on how things are viewed and you could just be more stressed out than before.

 

[al audi]

Yep

 

[secretzofwar]

I've been thinking about this subject a lot lately, and in a society that glorifies youth and potential, it's hard not to think things were better when you were younger, though that may not even be true.

Still, there's something unsettling about knowing my days of hanging at friends' parents' house, failing with women, and not caring about much are long gone. It sucks, but there's no point in grasping for something you had when you were 16. I enjoy looking back, but also enjoy looking at what's going on right now. If you don't like it, change it.

The grass is always greener on the other side.

 

[executive76]

Only in terms of shooting jumpers. I don't get to play ball as much as I used to so my jumper hasn't been falling as of late.

I'm just the opposite. My jumper was always decent but now it's better but I lost some of my handles

Also I used to hustle a lot more/harder when I was younger |I

 

[koudie from brooklyn]

I used to be the man |I

 

[dt43]

How old are you? What do you like? ( very broad for a reason. could be sports, the moon, plastic forks, anything, name it. )

27 (28 on monday).

I'm pretty much a record collector/music fanatic/beatsmith (when i'm in the mood).

I haven't hit the lanes in a little over a decade but i'm a pretty good bowler too. I'm sort of itching to get back to it.

Is your career music related? Why don't you pursue something with that?


To OP, I was in your position at one point. Not gonna get into it but I was depressed as hell and completely lost my zeal for life. What got me out of it was just going back to basics. Just go back to the things that made you happy when you were a kid.. allow yourself to remember that feeling of being really obsessed with something, whether it's music, art, playing ball, even video games, etc. When was the last time you did something completely pointless and trivial, just for the sake of doing it? As you get older and more indoctrinated into the Western culture of depression, you start to forget that those little things are actually where the fun in life lies. You have to start allowing yourself to enjoy life again. You can't possibly make any useful life plans if you are always in a state of depression and despair.

If you just stay with a philosophy of not being so hard on yourself and allowing yourself to enjoy life, you'll eventually begin to release all your built up negative energy/self-doubt and you will feel a lot more optimistic. Trust me. Good luck

 

[celticsfan9783]

I dont know man. I feel like I slowly just started losing that charisma that I used to have. Like I used to be the type of guy that would say "let's go look for some chicks," cause I had confidence flowing through my veins. Now I look at myself and wonder where and how that confidence dissappeared. My bad if I'm not being clear

I can relate to this. Used to be a big time athlete when I was younger. Had crazy confidence where I could have a whole season resting on my shoulders, not even flinch, and actually welcome the challenge. Walked head held high. Not scared of much. Class clown type, but not in a disrespectful way, still maintained top of the class grades. Was always on the prowl for girls, stuff to do on the weekend. Loved looking forward to what the future held in store.

Now I'm like wtf happened, where'd that all go? I think it's a combination of growing up + fearing the unknown + society (very vague I know) + a little depression sprinkled on top. It's been a few years I've been battling trying to get my legs under me...hoping and trying that the next few will be better. But yeah OP I def feel where you are coming from and I'm sure a lot of people do.

 

[Mamba4life]

I definitely feel like a shell of my former self when I'm on the basketball court. I used to have BOUNCE. The funny thing is. I look at the rim and a portion of my brain still thinks I can do the things I used to do when I was in my early 20s. Speaking of that, I'm hearing a lot of defeatist attitudes permeating throughout this thread. Regardless of your age, you can do whatever you want to do with your life. If you think you're a loner, force yourself into social settings. If you're not satisfied with your career/job, further your education. If you're not satisfied with your spouse, suck it up and get a dog. Seriously, it's cheaper to keep her. This world is full of opportunities. You simply have to make up your mind to go and do it. I do think some of you are confusing losing your zest for life with the monotony that becomes life when you get a little older. Have no fear my young NTers. There will come a time in your life when you appreciate boredom and monotony. Drama is for the birds. Give me nice and steady.

 

[SneakerProSr.]

I look at the birds I used to ****-out on instagram and now it would make my week if an equivalent broad gave me their number.

 

[nealraj006]

Sounds like depression to me. Proper nutrition, supplementation, and exercise can help. Find a 'functional medicine' doctor and see what they can do about it.

 

[combo gd]

I can't even front, I feel better than ever.

After some rough times, my mind is sharp and my perspective on life is pretty clear. I think perspective is the most important thing a person can have in this world. 

Life is good

 

[airblaster503]

I can relate OP. I will be turning 26 in a couple weeks and feel like I am just a shell of the person I once was. In college was surrounded by close friends, always on the go doing things. Now everyone has moved on, most of those friends live an hour + away from where I am at. The town I live in is pretty lame, my "friends" never come here to hang out, it is always me making the drive, I am over it. As I have gotten older it is harder to branch out and meet new people, I have some people I can hang out with from work but for people I know local to me that is about it.

One thing I reflect on that kind of bothers me is when I hang out with my good friends all we do is drink, rarely are we doing anything active or what not. Like man social drinking is good and all but not doing anything else really makes friendships feel cheaper. I really need to start making goals and sticking with them. I have been putting off finishing colIege way to long, party because I am not sure what I want to do, mostly because I keep putting it off and not thinking about it. I am going to follow through with it because the past few months I realized I really need a change of scenery, but I need a better job to feel more secure moving to a new place.

 

[norcalhussla]

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^ how i feel after reading this thread...