Dating Girls With Kids.......

[stillin729]

i meet a very cute girl but when she told me she had a kid, man it changed my whole perception

you are always gonna have that drama of the kid's dad being around and you will be around more so the kid eventually starts to look at you as the fatherfigure

my boy wifed up a chick with a kid and we never see him and the kid made him a Father's Day card this year, 3 years old, to make it even worse chick is anunattractive, fat biotch

Bottomline: chicks with kids = more drama then it's worth

 

[al audi]

Look, you either wanna be a father figure to a kid that isn't yours or not. Dudes sayin she don't ask for nothing.....if it get real serious andyou're basically the father figure that will def change later on. She will want you to be that kids father an plenty things that come along with bein adad. I'd never put myself in a position where I bond with some chick kid then tell lil man/chick. Iight it was coo I'm out.

 

[ccb21040]

i would smash a chick with a kid, but i wouldnt wife. too much drama whether it be the baby's father or the kid blocking.

 

[dead stokc]

Originally Posted by Sorkoram

Did it/ Doing it

Baby's father is a deadbeat, she supports herself and her child, not asking me for help. As long as she's got her stuff together, it's fine with me.

QFT
Word to Ant, a chick w/o kids can be just as much
drama, if not more, than a chick with. I think some
dudes just feel like the shorty might be lookin for
a way out thru other men or might feel like a sucker
for raising another mans child.
I used to think the same way. I'd be mad @ the dudes
on Maury for taking care of kids they kno aint theirs, disregarding
the fact that the broads a @$@+% and cheated. But I've grown
to think different.

 

[sorkoram]

Originally Posted by Al Audi

Look, you either wanna be a father figure to a kid that isn't yours or not. Dudes sayin she don't ask for nothing.....if it get real serious and you're basically the father figure that will def change later on. She will want you to be that kids father an plenty things that come along with bein a dad. I'd never put myself in a position where I bond with some chick kid then tell lil man/chick. Iight it was coo I'm out.

We had already discussed the father figure role and personally, I have no problem stepping in and being the father figure, in place of a dead-beatfather. I'm quite sure she'd never ask me to fully support her and her child because she can handle it (proven). I have a different view of it becausemy father was dead-beat and my stepfather stepped in to assume that role, thankfully. I wouldn't want to see any child without a father figure in theirlife and if that means taking that chance with her, and it isn't adding that much drama in my life (of course there will be some, it's understood),I'm all for it.

 

[al audi]

Originally Posted by Sorkoram

Originally Posted by Al Audi

Look, you either wanna be a father figure to a kid that isn't yours or not. Dudes sayin she don't ask for nothing.....if it get real serious and you're basically the father figure that will def change later on. She will want you to be that kids father an plenty things that come along with bein a dad. I'd never put myself in a position where I bond with some chick kid then tell lil man/chick. Iight it was coo I'm out.

We had already discussed the father figure role and personally, I have no problem stepping in and being the father figure, in place of a dead-beat father. I'm quite sure she'd never ask me to fully support her and her child because she can handle it (proven). I have a different view of it because my father was dead-beat and my stepfather stepped in to assume that role, thankfully. I wouldn't want to see any child without a father figure in their life and if that means taking that chance with her, and it isn't adding that much drama in my life (of course there will be some, it's understood), I'm all for it.

sall good then

thats all im sayin basically

 

[airant23]

YO!

you are always gonna have that drama of the kid's dad being around and you will be around more so the kid eventually starts to look at you as the father figure

my boy wifed up a chick with a kid and we never see him and the kid made him a Father's Day card this year, 3 years old, to make it even worse chick is an unattractive, fat biotch

Bottomline: chicks with kids = more drama then it's worth
First thing... you're not "always gonna have that drama." My older cousin has a daughter; her mom has since married and they haveanother child. My cousin goes and scoops both kids and take them out. He's mature enough to let his daughter's mother have weekends alone with herhusband. And in return, of course, dude has no problem with my cousin. It's like the children both have 2 fathers.

Second, going back to maturity, so what if the kid made a father's day card? There are too many men having babies of their own who aren't ready anyway.Much rather the kid have a "decent" example of man to look up to than none at all.

All in all; it's cool if anyone would prefer not to deal with a child that isn't his or hers. But to think that doing so is so wrapped in tragicconsequence and circumstance that it couldn't be rewarding and fulfilling is idiotic.

DF!!!

 

[biff lawson]

Originally Posted by CIDMAN911

Originally Posted by Al Audi

I don't see the point, plenty of bad chicks left who don't have kids.

SABU

 

[blackmagnus514]

Aint no time to stick around and play steppops

 

[l silky johnston l]

Originally Posted by krazy88s

Dudes dont wann raise a seed that aint their own.

Pretty much.

 

[BANLEU]

My kid is due in Jan. and I'm with the bm we live together and plan on raising our family together, which may include another kid in the future. With thatsaid if it ever didnt work out with her I'm not sure exactly how I would handle her dating. I mean right now I'm extremely over protective of herbecause she is having my first kid which means a lot to me. So I guess in the beginning I would be mad salty but as long as she remembers who the kids fatheris and never lets her bf cross the line with my kid I dont think I would cause drama.

But I guess a big reason why a lot of fathers cause drama to begin with is because they sort of feel entitled to their bm. What I mean is once you have a kidwith them it's like you there is always going to be a bond. There is always going to be a reason to talk to each other, see each other, and probably havesex. Therefore, when someone else comes in the picture they feel threatened because they don't want to lose that relationship or don't want someonetaking over their role as a father. Lastly, I know I would flip if my girl got pregnant with another mans baby.

Anyway this only applies for fathers who are in the picture not dead beats. So to sum it all up dating a woman with kids comes with too much baggage that isntworth it just for sex especially when their are plenty of women without kids.

 

[regal black]

didn't date them, but I smashed a few

 

[Gordonson]

Do I look like m*#)%(&*^&% Morris Chesnut to you?

 

[dead stokc]

@Mr Anleu
if it didnt work out, and u was doing
ur own thing, ie starting a new family
how can u be mad or feel a way if ur
BM got preggo by another man?

I understand the line being drawn
when it comes to respecting the BF
and the child, thats typical.

 

[daemacho]

im 26, and at this point in my life, i couldnt do it.

 

[BANLEU]

Originally Posted by Dead Stokc

@Mr Anleu
if it didnt work out, and u was doing
ur own thing, ie starting a new family
how can u be mad or feel a way if ur
BM got preggo by another man?

I understand the line being drawn
when it comes to respecting the BF
and the child, thats typical.

I wouldnt start a new family with another girl because we both grew up in families with half brothers and sisters and we noticed that a lot of times thesiblings whose parents were together got preferential treatment. Besides as a kid it is hard to comprehend why your parents are not together or are withsomeone else and this can often lead to problems with the kid. The last thing either of us wants to do is harm our kids development so we've both agreedthat even if it doesnt work out we wouldnt start new families.

 

[al audi]

Originally Posted by daemacho

im 26, and at this point in my life, i couldnt do it.

i dont get why any young man would wanna be in this situation when there are still plenty chicks without kids......this is just my logic.

at 40+ its a different story

 

[nationaltruckerdave]

Originally Posted by CIDMAN911

Originally Posted by King Beef

I would DATE but i wouldn't hope for anything too serious. I don't want that uneeded burnden.

 

[raptors29]

I might be able to do it when I'm older, but definitely not now.

 

[frankreynolds420]

Cause they got kids.

 

[daemacho]

i agree, maybe if i ended up single at 40+, i wouldn't care if the woman had kids. Most likely i would have kids by then.

Right now, i don't wanna deal with the stress of having a girl and +1 or 2 mouths to feed.

 

[a stunting gotrilla]

guys with kids just kinda FELL into my lap...


my biggest issue is that sometimes we wouldn't be able to chill/hang cuz of their fatherly duties. I shunned it at first, saying I wouldn't be in arelationship with a guy with a kid, but as of late, I've been somewhat converted

Although my ultimate preference is a man with a clean slate like mine.

 

[superblytrife]

It's tough to play that father role when you're just dating--very tough. Especially if you don't think there's much of a future there. Ifyou're just casually dating I'd probably think twice about a chick with a child, for you and that kid's sake.

I met my WIFE when I was 26 and she has 2 kids. I was kind of leery at first, but she was just too good of a woman to pass up. She was pretty conscious of myrole though, which was helpful. She didn't expect me to just jump in and be dad; matter of fact I didn't meet the kids until 4 months into us dating. She already had her own career as an RN so money wasn't an issue. When we got engaged all of that changed, but that's expected as you're basicallymaking a lifelong commitment to her and her children.

Fathering kids that aren't your own is tough and it definitely isn't for everyone. I come from a blended family though, so it was just natural for meI guess. There's some drama with the kid's dad/wife's ex, but now that he's married he's chilled out a ton. But I just chalk that up tojealousy and saltiness, which makes me

.

Now though, those kids are like my own and they look at me like a father figure. They respect me like a dad, show love to me like a dad and rely on me like adad. They just don't call me dad, which is okay with me. Being a father is so much more than having that label of "dad", in my opinion.

 

[peteweezy]

I've seen other situations where the girl leaves her new bf for her bd because of jealousy and trying to "keep their family together".
Basically happened to me. Bd come in singing on Jodeci tip begging and stuff and chicks fall for it. I'm like dude on home alone (thegangsta movies) that says I could go on for days baby. I don't think I would do it again esp with no young chick maybe an older chick. Like somebody saidits alot of girls that are nice without kids.

 

[dead stokc]

@Trife
story sounds like mine, except I was 25 & we turned
26 on the same day. I just move light years to fast.

Playing the father figure seems to be more of the
responsibility than just dating the girl, because ur
just not taking on a relationship with her, but her
kid(s) as well, which might not be for everyone.