Confessions

School, school, school man.

I just finished my Freshman year of college. Did horribly first semester due to foolishly not going to class and being just an overall lazy person. I knew that I couldn't keep living like that, so I went back second semester and actually put in effort. Ended up missing less than 10 classes all together I think, but the issue is that I ended up missing one major test in three of my courses somewhere between those collective ten classes.

The test I missed in math left me crippled with a C+ (If I had taken it, I would've had an A), the final exam I missed in Business Law left me with a D (I was able to make it up, but I spent so long using the study guide for the multiple choice section; I barely scratched the essays), and because I missed the final in Microeconomics left me with an absent from final grade. Being that I was already on academic probation from the first semester of screwing up, I only had 4 classes all together for the second semester. Just imagine my GPA already, based on the three grades I listed. Absolutely horrible.

I planned to come back and take the Microeconomics exam, but it wasn't financially viable and I couldn't get a ride to go back to NY. Realizing that everything was about to crash down on me, I quickly became depressed and full of anxiety. I've been this way since May :{

Lost my scholarship. Lost my financial aid. Was supposed to get an appeal letter for my financial aid done by this past Monday, but my mom got into a car accident this past Saturday so these last few days have been hectic. I don't know what I'm going to do, but I need to figure it out fast. I'm smart, and I can do the work. I just need one final chance to turn everything around.

How do you miss final exams?
 
How do you miss final exams?

I stayed up all night studying, and what was supposed to be a quick nap to keep me alive during the test ended up resulting in me sleeping clean through it.

I'm a moron, I know :{

I've been sitting here trying to think of what I can say in this appeal letter that could get me just one more chance to turn all my mess ups around. :(
 
How do you miss final exams?

I stayed up all night studying, and what was supposed to be a quick nap to keep me alive during the test ended up resulting in me sleeping clean through it.

I'm a moron, I know :{

I've been sitting here trying to think of what I can say in this appeal letter that could get me just one more chance to turn all my mess ups around. :(

All nighters aren't the answer my dude.

Get those 8 hours of sleep. Your memory will thank you.

I aced every test I've ever gotten good sleep for. Can't say the same for my all-nighters. Your brain has a way of just freezing when you need it the most for critical thinking questions and fact-recalling.
 
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All nighters aren't the answer my dude.

Get those 8 hours of sleep. Your memory will thank you.

I aced every test I've ever gotten good sleep for. Can't say the same for my all-nighters. Your brain has a way of just freezing when you need it the most for critical thinking questions and fact-recalling.

This happened to me all through out last year. Mind would just lock up at the most inopportune times. :{ Sheer struggle.

I appreciate the advice man, if I can figure out what to say in this appeal letter I'm definitely putting it into action. My head was all over the place Freshman year, but I'm focused now and just want a chance to show it.
 
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All nighters aren't the answer my dude.

Get those 8 hours of sleep. Your memory will thank you.

I aced every test I've ever gotten good sleep for. Can't say the same for my all-nighters. Your brain has a way of just freezing when you need it the most for critical thinking questions and fact-recalling.

This happened to me all through out last year. Mind would just lock up at the most inopportune times. :{ Sheer struggle.

I appreciate the advice man, if I can figure out what to say in this appeal letter I'm definitely putting it into action. My head was all over the place Freshman year, but I'm focused now and just want a chance to show it.

No problem. Sometimes a second chance is all we need.

I'm still working my way out of my mediocre GPA for med school. Like you, I squandered a lot of opportunities to excel. It wasn't until later that I learned and by then, it was already pretty tough to raise my GPA due to all the classes I had took. Little by little, I'm raising that sucker :lol
 
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No problem. Sometimes a second chance is all we need.

I'm still working my way out of my mediocre GPA for med school. Little by little, I'm raising that sucker :lol

I hope you pull it off man, I know medical schools have discerning eyes when it come to GPA's. In the worst case scenario, I heard that MCAT scores and science GPAs can help even out the playing field a bit. How much time do you have before you have to start applying?
 
I love spending time with women/girls.
They're all the same, but a lil different in lil ways.
I have a gf. And not sure if it'd be coo to hang out with other girls. Prolly knot, butt phoc it
 
I have a lot going on right now and I feel extremely overwhelmed. School has my mind spinning and I'm ready to conquer it and finish what I started by time is flying by and I'm getting older and my progress is slow. On top of that I posted a few weeks in here about my ex. I still had feelings for her but we were so on and off and their were so many trust issues. Our last text convo I called her trash and basically dogged her out because I saw another car in her driveway when we just had sex a week prior and were on good terms (she lives in my neighborhood and lives by herself) I knew I hit the right buttons in my text because I always know what to say to get a reaction out of her but at that point I genuinely didnt care because I felt like I was wasting my time and energy on a girl that I claimed I "loved" and respected but couldn't show the same respect toward me. Kept it real G in the text and she sent the final response trying to say I was all in my feelings and I never responded and hadn't seen or heard from her in a month, so I win, right?

Wrong.
2 weeks ago I was at work when my boys call me on 3 way and tell me that my ex (who normally keeps her IG page private) is flaunting pics of her cuddled up in bed with this weak *** ***** I used to call a friend. Ol dude has been in my house, eaten out my fridge. I've taken trips with this dude and he crossed the homie code. I always knew he had a thing for her because he would always tell me "man your girl is bad, you're lucky" or "how is you and ______ doing? One of my "real" homeboy calls up dude after they told me the news and basically calls him a ***** for what he did. Ol boy tells him that him and my ex had multiple convos about me and that she convinced him that me and her were over. (Pillow talking :{ )My "real" homeboy proceeds to tell him that not only is he a *****, he's a sucka for openly falling for the rebound game and taking pics on IG with her. There are way more details but long story short he had sex with her a couple times and is claiming her as his girlfriend (:{ they gotta make these dudes in a lab cause there is no way they can be any types of REAL) I mean ol boy has to come to my neighborhood to go to her house!!! What kinda dude is this?!? I've been ignoring it but I can't lie its been on my mind every single day since I heard the news and it breaks my heart that 1) at first I thought the world of this girl and was ready to marry her, and she became someone I never wanna see or talk to for the rest of my life and 2) that someone that you can call your friend would do some foul **** like that. I've been trying to stay positive and get at some other chicks but I think I've been emotionally scarred for the rest of my life and I didn't see it coming. Wow
 
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I been striking out with the females lately. Two easy layups were in my palms and I squandered both. I need to find my confidence...
 
I'm real butthurt about how this chick played me
mean.gif
Was this the chick you met on that Thursday,couple weeks ago??
The second time I fapp'd, I fapp'd myself to dehydration.
laugh.gif


-Saw my ex today,felt nice.

-She got slightly bigger.

-Got a $5 tip that made my day.
 
I think i found the "one" but im not ready for that yet. I want to explore more because im a late bloomer. However i am afraid i might lose her if i let her go. 

what should i do? im 28 
 
I love spending time with women/girls.
They're all the same, but a lil different in lil ways.
I have a gf. And not sure if it'd be coo to hang out with other girls. Prolly knot, butt phoc it
Is it the fact they are females or are they friends of yours?

I hang out with female friends from time to time but its usually in a group setting. Honestly, I don't have a female friend I wouldn't consider more with if the situation was right. Another reason why I try to limit it to group settings. You could be suffering from the "greener grass" syndrome like many guys go through (myself included).

Just go by the golden rule: would you have a problem with her hanging out with other dudes?
 
I think i found the "one" but im not ready for that yet. I want to explore more because im a late bloomer. However i am afraid i might lose her if i let her go. 

what should i do? im 28 

Speaking as someone who thought the same at 28, like she's the one but you ain't done yet... show her you care, don't ever make her feel like you see anyone else or that she's unwanted, but.... yeah see other chicks. Sounds terrible to say, but hear me out. That urge to sow your wild oats will pop up and it will show to her and everyone else if you try to repress it. you gotta do what you gotta do to keep it in control and keep her. If ya'll get serious cut it though. Ya'll so new there's no way she'll be ok with it if you tell her that. It's not really cheating if ya'll just dating, you supposed to have options anyways, that's what dating is, weeding out options.
 
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since the last time I posted in here I've developed this mindset of its all about my future children and thel legacy I will leave behind..this mindset has made me extremely confident because I feel that im in charge of my life 100% for the first time

I truly believe whatever you think about will come to reality so I try to stay positive no matter what

My dad im not going to throw him under the bus but dude is by far the most stubborn person..its frustrating because my mom gets chewed out on the daily..according to my dad everything that is wrong in his life is because of her..yet when my mother had to go to the hospital a few weeks back this guy was panicking like a young female...I was trying to tell him as my dad I feel your supposed to set an example of how to treat your wife infront of your child I know nobodys perfect and people argue but in my 23 years on this earth ive seen them argue more than they were happy..If your honestly not happy why stay with your spouse..lemme guess its cheaper to keep her huh..its like he uses her as a emotional tampon that's it.

I like having real life conversations with people about life and their views on certain things
 
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I have a lot going on right now and I feel extremely overwhelmed. School has my mind spinning and I'm ready to conquer it and finish what I started by time is flying by and I'm getting older and my progress is slow. On top of that I posted a few weeks in here about my ex. I still had feelings for her but we were so on and off and their were so many trust issues. Our last text convo I called her trash and basically dogged her out because I saw another car in her driveway when we just had sex a week prior and were on good terms (she lives in my neighborhood and lives by herself) I knew I hit the right buttons in my text because I always know what to say to get a reaction out of her but at that point I genuinely didnt care because I felt like I was wasting my time and energy on a girl that I claimed I "loved" and respected but couldn't show the same respect toward me. Kept it real G in the text and she sent the final response trying to say I was all in my feelings and I never responded and hadn't seen or heard from her in a month, so I win, right?

Wrong.
2 weeks ago I was at work when my boys call me on 3 way and tell me that my ex (who normally keeps her IG page private) is flaunting pics of her cuddled up in bed with this weak *** ***** I used to call a friend. Ol dude has been in my house, eaten out my fridge. I've taken trips with this dude and he crossed the homie code. I always knew he had a thing for her because he would always tell me "man your girl is bad, you're lucky" or "how is you and ______ doing? One of my "real" homeboy calls up dude after they told me the news and basically calls him a ***** for what he did. Ol boy tells him that him and my ex had multiple convos about me and that she convinced him that me and her were over. (Pillow talking :{ )My "real" homeboy proceeds to tell him that not only is he a *****, he's a sucka for openly falling for the rebound game and taking pics on IG with her. There are way more details but long story short he had sex with her a couple times and is claiming her as his girlfriend (:{ they gotta make these dudes in a lab cause there is no way they can be any types of REAL) I mean ol boy has to come to my neighborhood to go to her house!!! What kinda dude is this?!? I've been ignoring it but I can't lie its been on my mind every single day since I heard the news and it breaks my heart that 1) at first I thought the world of this girl and was ready to marry her, and she became someone I never wanna see or talk to for the rest of my life and 2) that someone that you can call your friend would do some foul **** like that. I've been trying to stay positive and get at some other chicks but I think I've been emotionally scarred for the rest of my life and I didn't see it coming. Wow
mane **** shorty and that dude...situations like this can be good because it helps let these type of snakes out of your life
 
My other confession for the day, I've come to the conclusion that I'm awkward. :{
 
Insurance. Can't say what company I work for though

I have a plan though. Not trying to work for someone for the rest of my life and get a cut of the profit. I have a bigger vision.


Kind of curious but I know you can't tell :lol. Keep working hard though, it'll definitely pay off.

I'm always looking out for myself and try to take routes that better position my life but I low key feel selfish for this thought. I've been talking to this chick, its cool and all, but I really don't want to settle down right now. I like her but I just got accepted to a university and I know the yambs will be plentiful. I don't wanna end on bad terms with this chick though. It won't end well but I know for a fact that I'm gonna be intrigued by the women's. I just don't wanna be that dude that's looking back at life and having regrets.
 
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I have a lot going on right now and I feel extremely overwhelmed. School has my mind spinning and I'm ready to conquer it and finish what I started by time is flying by and I'm getting older and my progress is slow. On top of that I posted a few weeks in here about my ex. I still had feelings for her but we were so on and off and their were so many trust issues. Our last text convo I called her trash and basically dogged her out because I saw another car in her driveway when we just had sex a week prior and were on good terms (she lives in my neighborhood and lives by herself) I knew I hit the right buttons in my text because I always know what to say to get a reaction out of her but at that point I genuinely didnt care because I felt like I was wasting my time and energy on a girl that I claimed I "loved" and respected but couldn't show the same respect toward me. Kept it real G in the text and she sent the final response trying to say I was all in my feelings and I never responded and hadn't seen or heard from her in a month, so I win, right?

Wrong.
2 weeks ago I was at work when my boys call me on 3 way and tell me that my ex (who normally keeps her IG page private) is flaunting pics of her cuddled up in bed with this weak *** ***** I used to call a friend. Ol dude has been in my house, eaten out my fridge. I've taken trips with this dude and he crossed the homie code. I always knew he had a thing for her because he would always tell me "man your girl is bad, you're lucky" or "how is you and ______ doing? One of my "real" homeboy calls up dude after they told me the news and basically calls him a ***** for what he did. Ol boy tells him that him and my ex had multiple convos about me and that she convinced him that me and her were over. (Pillow talking :{ )My "real" homeboy proceeds to tell him that not only is he a *****, he's a sucka for openly falling for the rebound game and taking pics on IG with her. There are way more details but long story short he had sex with her a couple times and is claiming her as his girlfriend (:{ they gotta make these dudes in a lab cause there is no way they can be any types of REAL) I mean ol boy has to come to my neighborhood to go to her house!!! What kinda dude is this?!? I've been ignoring it but I can't lie its been on my mind every single day since I heard the news and it breaks my heart that 1) at first I thought the world of this girl and was ready to marry her, and she became someone I never wanna see or talk to for the rest of my life and 2) that someone that you can call your friend would do some foul **** like that. I've been trying to stay positive and get at some other chicks but I think I've been emotionally scarred for the rest of my life and I didn't see it coming. Wow

Damn. That's some cutthroat **** right there. Don't waste your energy on it though. It'll take you a while to shake the thoughts, but once you do, just live your life without involving them or letting them involve themselves in your life in any way. The best revenge is success, so focus on improving your situation and before long you'll be in a place where you won't even remember why either of them mattered.




My other confession for the day, I've come to the conclusion that I'm awkward. :{


Is it because you lack confidence based on the way you let women walk all over you? You have to get some ice in your veins and stop getting used and abused. That awkward **** will be a thing of the past once you start winning with women. Stop playing the sucker/simp role.
 
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^^^ True. Props for the reality check. Sometimes I wonder if :smokin has effected my confidence, it shouldn't, but who knows.

The thing is, I know I should have more confidence, I'm 6'5 and in fantastic shape. I'm not bad looking. I was super uncoordinated as a kid, and got made fun of, and that just always effected me I guess. I always feel out of place where ever I am, and I can never shake that feeling. Maybe it's because I stick out being so tall and muscular. But why does that make me lack self confidence? It's just weird. :{ @ me.
 
Well if you think it's the trees, try life without it. Whatever the case, be the alpha version of you.

And of course man. That's what NT General is about. Dropping jewels and helping each other out with healthy doses of ribbing and reality.
 
mane **** shorty and that dude...situations like this can be good because it helps let these type of snakes out of your life


Just cut both those people out your life and move on.


Damn. That's some cutthroat **** right there. Don't waste your energy on it though. It'll take you a while to shake the thoughts, but once you do, just live your life without involving them or letting them involve themselves in your life in any way. The best revenge is success, so focus on improving your situation and before long you'll be in a place where you won't even remember why either of them mattered.

Some real knowledge y'all dropping on me. I thank you NT brethren. It gets easier by the day but I only thought stuff like that happened on TV. It's all G though, life goes on
 
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