YO! Would you say women are more likely to lead someone on?...

[blackmagnus514]

Hell yeah...

Women lead you on thinking you'll get the box...

Guys lead on letting her think she's the only one...

women win by default because they have options

 

[airant23]

YO!

I would say it's close to equal. I mean how often do you hear about men who keep having sex with women knowing that she wants more than just sex??
Well, to that all I can say is: if the general belief is that men have little to no emotional attachment to sex (and I'm not speaking formyself on this point), why set yourself up for failure? Understood, people generally can be deceiving and manipulative - but why spread your legs to guy whohas yet to show you the kind of commitment you're looking for? It's elementary to me, my dear.

Also you keep using yourself as an example but there are way too many men out there who just don't see the signs and assume a hell of a lot. I've been through it, it's damn annoying

.
I can only use myself (and my people, to a short extent) as an example. But what signs are you saying guys are missing? Signs that someonedoesn't want more than a friendship or signs that someone wants more from them?

DF!!!

 

[soltheman]

Originally Posted by MF Doomer

Guys lead girls on for sex with promises of real relationships.

Pipe game.

That's a rare situation cause women can get that anywhere, everywhere, anytime, with anyone.

True story.

When a female is getting lead on by guys, at least she'll get (somewhat) treated to the things she likes. And if not, she'll at least get sex whenever.

But when a dude is getting lead on, he's expected to (by the girl,) pay for dates, take her out, and wait on her. With no benefits.

In my eyes, women do it worse. Not saying that there aren't vile guys, but I see girls doing it a lot more often than guys.

 

[dylishis]

Hm. Judging from personal experience... It's hard to say whether women do it more. I wouldn't know.

I agree with the comment that guys lead girls on for sex knowing that's all they want, but that could be avoided by girls not giving it up all willy nillyif they think they want a man. I'm all for getting yours, if that's what you want... but girls are always jumping in the bed within a week/few days w/guys expecting these fools to buy the cow when they're just pouring out the milk. Real relationships can grow from this...it HAPPENS, but eh... pass.



I don't think I've led guys on more than guys just can't take a damn hint sometimes!

We're not trying to hurt nobody's feelings. If we cut off contact, y'all say we're +$*#+## or we act like we're too good. So, when we try and kick it with y'all on a friendly basis, you say we're leading you on. We just can't win.


^ That.

 

[ghenges]

I'd say girls are more likely to (unintentionally?) send out false signals but at the same time, dudes are more likely to mis-read signals.


Either way, men or women, it's not cool to play with people's feelings

 

[kix4kix]

Originally Posted by Glory Glory Hallelujah

We're not trying to hurt nobody's feelings. If we cut off contact, y'all say we're +$*#+## or we act like we're too good. So, when we try and kick it with y'all on a friendly basis, you say we're leading you on. We just can't win.

Basically

 

[fantastic4our]

if I try to get at a young lady and she expresses that she's not interested, there is no longer any need for us to chill on an one on one basis. It's awaste of time that could be better spent pursuing potential prospects.

Now as far as a chick digging me, if I'm not digging her like that, I would still speak and text but I wouldn't try to chill on some one on one deal.

I think females are more likely to lead on guys because dudes usually try to get at them as opposed to vice versa so chicks generally have the upper hand inthese interactions

 

[t i c a l]

The ratio of girls who lead on guys is exponentially greater than that of guys who lead on girls.

- Tical.

 

[blackmagnus514]

But, speaking for myself, I'd be fine if a girl who had turned me down continued to see how I was doing or whatever.
hell no.

i DON'T take rejection well.

I mean how often do you hear about men who keep having sex with women knowing that she wants more than just sex??
and how often do you hear of women using sex as a way to keep the guy (as opposed to showing quality characteristics where a guy would WANT towife her)?

if I try to get at a young lady and she expresses that she's not interested, there is no longer any need for us to chill on an one on one basis. It's a waste of time that could be better spent pursuing potential prospects.

exactly. what's the point....then when they see you with a flyer chick, they get all "you forgot about me" !+%

"Have an affair, act like an adult for once..."

 

[mf doomer]

I don't think I've led guys on more than guys just can't take a damn hint sometimes!


Just break it down to them then.. all the signs, and hints arn't obvious when you have your mans take you out for dinners.

 

[club29]

Yeah Ant, thats a pretty accurate analysis.

We as men know what we want (as well as what we dont).

Therefore, we dont feel the need to lead someone on (not necesarilly because we're moral like that, we just dont want to waste anyones time (our ownincluded))

Women seem to get this thrill out of it sometimes.

I think back to the post a niketalker made a few weeks back about taking a girl he was into out to a nice dinner, only to be thrown a "im gonna take therest of this food to my boyfriend"

Honestly, just thinking about that story irks me. It didnt even happen to me!

Its very cruel. We as men (despite the front we have a tendency to put up) want to feel loved and validated.

its like the cat and the string that keeps getting pulled away.

 

[blackmagnus514]

@ hos going out with cats just for dinners

happened to me a couple of times before i smartened up.

 

[dylishis]

Its very cruel. We as men (despite the front we have a tendency to put up) want to feel loved and validated.
Well, gotta earn it. Now it seems like men in my age group (mid 20'sish) want everything to be handed to them with no work. It's likey'all think you can say "Hey, I want to get to know you." And we're supposed to just start spinning on your poles with that and that alone.I've had to wade through a lot of half-steppers who clearly wanted that love and validation but ...they weren't getting it from me because theydidn't deserve it.

Just break it down to them then.. all the signs, and hints arn't obvious when you have your mans take you out for dinners.

I'm not that desperate. I'll admit...when I feel like someone might be trying to play me, I don't mind playing them. BUT...if there'ssomeone I'm not feeling, I'm not going to let it go any further. My time is just as valuable as his and I'm not scandalous like that. I won'twaste a good man's time and dollar.

BUTTTTT!!! We were just talking about this on JJB... maybe y'all should wake up to the signs and stop trying to be victims all the time. Men are so selfishw/ their one track minds. Too focused on what THEY want and don't pay any mind to what's really going on. You wait until stuff goes downhill to getbutthurt.

Don't get me wrong, same goes for bubbleheaded chicks that fall in love with losers and start paying phone bills and buying diapers fortheir MAN'S kids and other goofy stuff like that...all the while they're being cheated on etc. etc. A little awareness goes a long way with bothgenders.

 

[blackmagnus514]

^ funny that i could say the same for most females

 

[club29]

Originally Posted by Dylishis

Its very cruel. We as men (despite the front we have a tendency to put up) want to feel loved and validated.

Well, gotta earn it. Now it seems like men in my age group (mid 20'sish) want everything to be handed to them with no work. It's like y'all think you can say "Hey, I want to get to know you." And we're supposed to just start spinning on your poles with that and that alone. I've had to wade through a lot of half-steppers who clearly wanted that love and validation but ...they weren't getting it from me because they didn't deserve it.


Well what do you define as 'earning' and 'deserving' it exactly?

 

[glory glory hallelujah]

Originally Posted by FifthName

Originally Posted by Glory Glory Hallelujah

We're not trying to hurt nobody's feelings. If we cut off contact, y'all say we're +$*#+## or we act like we're too good. So, when we try and kick it with y'all on a friendly basis, you say we're leading you on. We just can't win.

I see you left out the option of politely informing said male that you're not interested in anything more than friendship, and then said male could decide his next course of action, which may be to stay friends or cut off all contact. Females are grimy these days boys, watch ya neck.

Why are you preaching to the choir? Isn't that assumed? And even still, how many times has a girl told y'all they weren't interested,yet you make it some quest to get her anyway? I can't tell you the things I hear when I go out.

"I'm sorry, I have a man."
"You can always have friends though."

"I'm sorry, I have a man."
"I'm not trying to talk to him. I'm trying to talk to you."

"I'm sorry, I have a man."
"You like to play on the side?"

"I'm sorry, I have a man."
"Want two?"

I mean, really? I think that a lot of the times, dudes get told or shown that the girl isn't interested, but for whatever reason, they don't get it.

Now before y'all come in here flaming me and *%*%, I'm not talking about these dumb broads who act like they DO want to be with a dude, only to usethem or string them along. I'm talking about when it's made apparent that she isn't interested, but she still thinks you're cool enough to kickit with sometimes. And I believe that has to be a mutual decision as well.

 

[airant23]

YO!

I think back to the post a niketalker made a few weeks back about taking a girl he was into out to a nice dinner, only to be thrown a "im gonna take the rest of this food to my boyfriend"
There's my point in a nutshell. That post.

This young lady I was talking to tried to argue (and may come in this thread and argue

) that "we (women) just think y'all (men) should be matureenough" to be able to continue the friendship. But it's ridiculous to think I've been dropping bread at AMC and Chilli's because I intend tokeep it platonic. Naw, I'll take my sister out for that.

DF!!!

 

[club29]

Originally Posted by Glory Glory Hallelujah

Originally Posted by FifthName

Originally Posted by Glory Glory Hallelujah

We're not trying to hurt nobody's feelings. If we cut off contact, y'all say we're +$*#+## or we act like we're too good. So, when we try and kick it with y'all on a friendly basis, you say we're leading you on. We just can't win.

I see you left out the option of politely informing said male that you're not interested in anything more than friendship, and then said male could decide his next course of action, which may be to stay friends or cut off all contact. Females are grimy these days boys, watch ya neck.

Why are you preaching to the choir? Isn't that assumed? And even still, how many times has a girl told y'all they weren't interested, yet you make it some quest to get her anyway? I can't tell you the things I hear when I go out.

"I'm sorry, I have a man."
"You can always have friends though."

"I'm sorry, I have a man."
"I'm not trying to talk to him. I'm trying to talk to you."

"I'm sorry, I have a man."
"You like to play on the side?"

"I'm sorry, I have a man."
"Want two?"

I mean, really? I think that a lot of the times, dudes get told or shown that the girl isn't interested, but for whatever reason, they don't get it.

Now before y'all come in here flaming me and *%*%, I'm not talking about these dumb broads who act like they DO want to be with a dude, only to use them or string them along. I'm talking about when it's made apparent that she isn't interested, but she still thinks you're cool enough to kick it with sometimes. And I believe that has to be a mutual decision as well.

I actually agree with you on this. I cant even begin to tell you how often ive seen those exchanges happen.

Some men dont get it, fair enough.

The rest, though, just enjoy playing the silly game.

 

[west2east]

Originally Posted by MF Doomer

Pipe game.

That's a rare situation cause women can get that anywhere, everywhere, anytime, with anyone.

The point is she wants it from him because she'd like a relationship from him.

If she's out whoring herself out then it doesn't count, but if she's being "faithful" to a dude thinking it's going to lead to arelationship while he knows it's not, then it's leading her on. I mean yall have to get real. I'm not talking about the guys who only call atmidnight and girls are dumb enough to think it could be something else, I'm talking about the guy who shows some interest sometimes and then just turnscold like it's nothing. The one who gives her just enough to keep stringing her along.

and how often do you hear of women using sex as a way to keep the guy (as opposed to showing quality characteristics where a guy would WANT to wife her)?

What's that have to do with her leading someone on? Isn't he just staying cuz the sex is good?

 

[dylishis]

watch ya neck. Why are you preaching to the choir? Isn't that assumed? And even still, how many times has a girl told y'all they weren't interested, yet you make it some quest to get her anyway? I can't tell you the things I hear when I go out.

"I'm sorry, I have a man."
"You can always have friends though."

"I'm sorry, I have a man."
"I'm not trying to talk to him. I'm trying to talk to you."

"I'm sorry, I have a man."
"You like to play on the side?"

"I'm sorry, I have a man."
"Want two?"

I mean, really? I think that a lot of the times, dudes get told or shown that the girl isn't interested, but for whatever reason, they don't get it.


THIS IS the mess I'm talking about. These are the types of dudes I wouldn't mind playing but I don't have time for that foolishness.

. Talk tome like I'm stupid, I'll treat you like YOU are. lol Not only is that not taking a hint, that's the type of mess that dudes need to ONLY pull ongirls that are certifiable dummies. You know they're not even serious but think they're doing something anyway. lol I swear, next time some worthlessclown approaches me like that, I'm juicing him.

 

[blackmagnus514]

@ "continuing the friendship"

that usually involves

1. being an emotional tampon with no payoff of any sort
2. hearing about other cats (and NO MAN wants to hear about other cats when he's pursuing a chick)
3. being in conversations with her about stuff her GFs and homosexual male friends should be engaging in.

point blank, (and i've tried to be friends with girls after we didnt work out), I cant do it. it's pointless.

like my ex tried to make me promise i'd be "friends with her in case we didnt work out"...i told her straight up that i dont get down like thatbecause i dont tak rejection well.I see her and i have nothing really to say to her. and she's seen me with my newest prospect (who, BTW, is prettier, morepleasant and less insecure than she is)...straight ice grills I never talk to any of my exes or females that i tried to get with and got shut down. it'sstupid and asinine to me. the time you waste holding her bag @ H&M could be spent talking to chicks who really wanna see where ya'll both could gotogether.

 

[airant23]

YO! West2East... my point is that, in theory, sex shouldn't lead to a relationship. So you'd be playing yourself.




And FTR... I've been looking for reasons to visit Chicago and Dallas.

DF!!!

 

[mf doomer]

. I'm talking about when it's made apparent that she isn't interested, but she still thinks you're cool enough to kick it with sometimes. And I believe that has to be a mutual decision as well.



A gay decision on the mans side as wel'l.

 

[blackmagnus514]

What's that have to do with her leading someone on? Isn't he just staying cuz the sex is good?
but the thing is,

she's relying on the sex to keep him...i honestly believe men will only go as far as they see what the woman can offer...so of course he's stayingbecause the sex is good...but sooner or later, she'll prolly want the relationship dynamic to come into play and if she's not offering something hisother options can give him, he's not gonna wanna just hop into a relationship with her.

Kleenex and Ben and Jerry's will be her best friends as she learns the phrases "Guys are dogs and just want sex"....forgetting that she was usingsex as a way to drag him in as opposed to showing other aspects of herself to make him wanna wife her.

 

[dylishis]

Originally Posted by Club29

Originally Posted by Dylishis

Its very cruel. We as men (despite the front we have a tendency to put up) want to feel loved and validated.

Well, gotta earn it. Now it seems like men in my age group (mid 20'sish) want everything to be handed to them with no work. It's like y'all think you can say "Hey, I want to get to know you." And we're supposed to just start spinning on your poles with that and that alone. I've had to wade through a lot of half-steppers who clearly wanted that love and validation but ...they weren't getting it from me because they didn't deserve it.

Well what do you define as 'earning' and 'deserving' it exactly?
Being a man and doing your job. If you express interest, SHOW interest. That's pretty much all I can say. I can't believe how muchfoolishness is running rampant.

Now, this is only general...I'm not directing this at anyone in this thread. It seems like the only men that really feel me are the older ones...too badI'm not into old sacks.

FYI (this is a general statement, not directed at any of you personally)

1) Stop approaching women thinking that's all you're gonna have to do. You don't get some girl's phone number... and then expect her to beblowing YOU up. If you're interested, ACT interested. Take the initiative. Maybe it's worth it, maybe it's not...you'll never know unless youtry. If it fails, so be it. Real men always bounce back.

2) Stop all of this 'watch a movie' mess. Take women out on a date. Show her you appreciate her and want to spend some quality time. If it's awaste of money because she turns out to suck.. so what? Don't/didn'tyou like the girl? Y'all are so paranoid thinking chicks are out there tryingto rape your pockets and you end up screwing yourselves in the end. Just going from some of the responses in this thread, did it ever occur to y'all thatMAYBE (just maybe) because of your behavior, your women responded accordingly? Yeah, there are some scandalous women out there. Don't get me wrong.But...tough +@#%, fellas...We bleed 3 months out of the year, y'all can take a little bit of rejection.

Builds character!

3) Not sure what 3 is exactly but it's just those little things that makes a man attractive. The same things that you guys would want in a woman. Mind yourmanners, don't be a phony...but don't act like you're with your boys when you're with a woman. Hold doors, PAY FOR THINGS... be a man.

I know y'all are about ready to stone me...but that's just how I feel. It may sound like I'm asking a lot but...to me it's one of those thingsthat could come back to you tenfold. I don't mean that in some conceited way, this goes for me and any woman that feels she's a good one. I'd makea deserving man VERY happy one day and all I can do is laugh whenever one misses out on all of this awesome because he dropped the ball before he even had it.