There are NO benefits for men to get married.

[al audi]

Originally Posted by ksteezy

Mrsouthernhospitality - just to add you speaking on marriage would be like me being strongly opinionated on how to raise a child being that I don't have any, it's one of those experiences we all think we have figured out but get smacked by reality when it happens, if you were divorce then I'd be more undersanding, but as of now you are just a dude who THINKS knows marriage is all about, but in reality has no idea.

ksteezy youre like a newlywed tho right?
at least you been with your chick 10 years before that, you guys ever had breaks?

i think both sides are making valid points in here.

an i def agree with more of the best friend notion

 

[al audi]

Originally Posted by ksteezy

Mrsouthernhospitality - just to add you speaking on marriage would be like me being strongly opinionated on how to raise a child being that I don't have any, it's one of those experiences we all think we have figured out but get smacked by reality when it happens, if you were divorce then I'd be more undersanding, but as of now you are just a dude who THINKS knows marriage is all about, but in reality has no idea.

ksteezy youre like a newlywed tho right?
at least you been with your chick 10 years before that, you guys ever had breaks?

i think both sides are making valid points in here.

an i def agree with more of the best friend notion

 

[ksteezy]

Originally Posted by Al Audi

Originally Posted by ksteezy

Mrsouthernhospitality - just to add you speaking on marriage would be like me being strongly opinionated on how to raise a child being that I don't have any, it's one of those experiences we all think we have figured out but get smacked by reality when it happens, if you were divorce then I'd be more undersanding, but as of now you are just a dude who THINKS knows marriage is all about, but in reality has no idea.

ksteezy youre like a newlywed tho right?
at least you been with your chick 10 years before that, you guys ever had breaks?

i think both sides are making valid points in here.

an i def agree with more of the best friend notion

Going on our 1st year Anniversary this week, still have tons to learn, but hopefully we have a lifetime to do so....and for those who believe a dude has to be forced into marriage because of peer preassure or social status, that's BS

once again inexperience speaking, in my personal experience I'm the frst out of my immediate circle to have gotten married, we all have just as long relationships, they just decided to live out of wedlock and have children.Feelsgodman @ your wife signing papers with your last name attached to hers.

 

[ksteezy]

Originally Posted by Al Audi

Originally Posted by ksteezy

Mrsouthernhospitality - just to add you speaking on marriage would be like me being strongly opinionated on how to raise a child being that I don't have any, it's one of those experiences we all think we have figured out but get smacked by reality when it happens, if you were divorce then I'd be more undersanding, but as of now you are just a dude who THINKS knows marriage is all about, but in reality has no idea.

ksteezy youre like a newlywed tho right?
at least you been with your chick 10 years before that, you guys ever had breaks?

i think both sides are making valid points in here.

an i def agree with more of the best friend notion

Going on our 1st year Anniversary this week, still have tons to learn, but hopefully we have a lifetime to do so....and for those who believe a dude has to be forced into marriage because of peer preassure or social status, that's BS

once again inexperience speaking, in my personal experience I'm the frst out of my immediate circle to have gotten married, we all have just as long relationships, they just decided to live out of wedlock and have children.Feelsgodman @ your wife signing papers with your last name attached to hers.

 

[al audi]

yea 1st year is like the best though, everyone says that

man id love to see this thread 5, even 10 years from now with the same ppl updated an see how we feel by then.

 

[al audi]

yea 1st year is like the best though, everyone says that

man id love to see this thread 5, even 10 years from now with the same ppl updated an see how we feel by then.

 

[nocomment6]

Originally Posted by ninjahood

Originally Posted by Still1Rise

Originally Posted by Al Audi

you might meet someone who will change your view on that opinion one day OP.

Women are depreciating asssets. Why buy when you can lease.

 

[nocomment6]

Originally Posted by ninjahood

Originally Posted by Still1Rise

Originally Posted by Al Audi

you might meet someone who will change your view on that opinion one day OP.

Women are depreciating asssets. Why buy when you can lease.

 

[All Ready]

i come from a family of successful marriages so i still have a positive outlook on marriage

but the women i see around are far from marriage material nor do they want to be married

i'd like to think i'd get married someday but it's not looking good as of right now

people are more into microwave relationships on some speed dating type stuff

 

[All Ready]

i come from a family of successful marriages so i still have a positive outlook on marriage

but the women i see around are far from marriage material nor do they want to be married

i'd like to think i'd get married someday but it's not looking good as of right now

people are more into microwave relationships on some speed dating type stuff

 

[10508 cardo jr ln]

Originally Posted by nocomment6

Originally Posted by ninjahood

Originally Posted by Still1Rise

Women are depreciating asssets. Why buy when you can lease.

 this my new shht, i aint callin em B's and H's no more! straight "get back, you depreciating asset" 

 on some "you're stock is dropping by the minute while mine rises"

 

[10508 cardo jr ln]

Originally Posted by nocomment6

Originally Posted by ninjahood

Originally Posted by Still1Rise

Women are depreciating asssets. Why buy when you can lease.

 this my new shht, i aint callin em B's and H's no more! straight "get back, you depreciating asset" 

 on some "you're stock is dropping by the minute while mine rises"

 

[ksteezy]

I can't front lots of good posts now that I go back, LDJ I respect the way you display your argument but just like I told Southen, you are clueless....is like me telling you what I think is the vest way to raise your children....all my friends live life the way you do, except they laugh at me for getting married because they say the option of them leaving with no legal or moral resentment still open, they are ok with the idea of raising their kids separate....they actually went about having kids to "strengthen" their relationship when it was rocky...what!? That blew my mind, perhaps you actually do want to spend the rest of your life with your baby-moms and leaving is not an option...then why not honor her, nobody said a wedding has to be a huge gathering, all you need is a priest and a couple of witnesses...I notice people who go against marriage are those who fail to see passed all legal and fancy crap of it to notice the simplicity of it, a bond/promise between a man and a woman who love/trust eachother blessed by God.

 

[ksteezy]

I can't front lots of good posts now that I go back, LDJ I respect the way you display your argument but just like I told Southen, you are clueless....is like me telling you what I think is the vest way to raise your children....all my friends live life the way you do, except they laugh at me for getting married because they say the option of them leaving with no legal or moral resentment still open, they are ok with the idea of raising their kids separate....they actually went about having kids to "strengthen" their relationship when it was rocky...what!? That blew my mind, perhaps you actually do want to spend the rest of your life with your baby-moms and leaving is not an option...then why not honor her, nobody said a wedding has to be a huge gathering, all you need is a priest and a couple of witnesses...I notice people who go against marriage are those who fail to see passed all legal and fancy crap of it to notice the simplicity of it, a bond/promise between a man and a woman who love/trust eachother blessed by God.

 

[i am that dude]

Originally Posted by 10508 Cardo Jr Ln

Originally Posted by nocomment6

Originally Posted by ninjahood

 this my new shht, i aint callin em B's and H's no more! straight "get back, you depreciating asset" 

 on some "you're stock is dropping by the minute while mine rises"

But how is your's rising though? Do you not age?

 

[i am that dude]

Originally Posted by 10508 Cardo Jr Ln

Originally Posted by nocomment6

Originally Posted by ninjahood

 this my new shht, i aint callin em B's and H's no more! straight "get back, you depreciating asset" 

 on some "you're stock is dropping by the minute while mine rises"

But how is your's rising though? Do you not age?

 

[ldj]

Originally Posted by ksteezy

Originally Posted by Mrsouthernhospitality

Originally Posted by ksteezy

Mrsouthernhospitality - how old are you?...not trying to bash you but maybe you haven't mature enough to make that step, can't say I blame you, just like you I held of onthe idea of marriage for a looooong time....only difference is I'm not afraid to admit I was thinking like a little boy....it is what it is, just don't spit that none-sense about your relationship >>>>> ANY marriage

Any good marriage >>>>>>> any good bf/gf relationship, let us be serious..

 at not being mature enough?
Im 25 going on 26 in October 
and my girl is the same age I dont know how could I make it any clearer 

that we both made this decision and came into an agreement

im not the only man that feels like that and shes not the only women that feels 

that way 

the crazy part about your argument is that you think there are not

any sensible,mature and responsible adults that view it the same way as me

you cant even show me a poll that says 100% of people man or women say that marriage is necessary 

any good marriage ======= any good bf/gf relationship 

only difference is a ring and it helps on your taxes

to me the American court system benefits of you marriage more then you do 

Im also going to keep saying my relationship >>>>>>>>>>>>>any marriage

its plenty of married couples that dont know $#!@ about each other 

im pretty sure there are tons of 4#!@%% marriages right now

weather married or not you deal with the same core issues 

 @ not being mature enough like everybody wants to take the same route as you 

Dude THE only difference is NOT the ring, that's your problem and that alone shows your and your girls maturity level if ya can't see passed that and all the legalities of it, it's a bond, a blessing, "till death do us part" does that not mean anything to you....when I stopped thinking about all the legalities of it and the vanity that came with what ring my wife would like I started seeing things different...you donot understand that prior to my marriage I felt alot like you, why do you think it took me 10 years to marry her?...but the second I said the words "I do" and she repeated them to me in front of a priest, something change in me and in our relationship, call me crazy but that bond we had built over 10 years is alot stronger now than it was before our marriage....THAT my friend is something you won't understand till you yourself get married....and the fact that you try to null my argument being that I've been on both sides of the spectrum is why I said you still need to grow up....you calling marriage a "status, title, a ring" that's all immaturity and inexperience speaking.

I think what he is trying to say is that ppl say that the ring/ceremony/contract=what marriage is all about and it doesnt. All those things are social symbolisms to prove to others what you vowed with marriage to be true. And i can only speak for  myself in saying that isnt true. And it was the time the ten years that made you guys bond love strong, the ring etc had nothing to do with it. Its just you have concieved your mind to believe that it did. And the whole death do us part in todays sociey is a joke. If you/your significant other lied/cheated/decieved etc to one another 99% of you guys and society would be headed to divorce court. And last time i checked if you cheated/lied/etc you dont just up and die. So that would mean that it isnt till death. And before you say i would never/they would never do that. that isnt the point the point is you vowed that under no circumstances other then demise would you ever be apart/seperate be less committed, lose love etc. And we all no that this isnt true. And a piece of paper/ring/ceremony doesnt make it true.

Marriage is meant to be more than social acceptance, approval,validity in others, prove show to others the bond between ppl. But a wedding is social, the pact is validity, and the ring is proof/showing to others. Which indirectly contridicts what was said in the vows.

If you truly love care for someone and are committed to them a contract/ring/wedding doesnt prove anything. It just shows others, displays to others the fact that you said it stated it. It doesnt show prove anything its time in, the actions, the things you do moving foward that show prove those things.

Its like i said before, i could sign my kids birth certificate, throw a big party, handout cigars and announce im about to be a daddy. How does that show prove that i will have an active role and a commitment in my kids life? This happens all the time albiet a majority of you guys this has happen to (single mother guys) So do you guys feel you who are products of no fathers being around, feel like your pops made a commitment and had a undying love for you and was there for you just cause he celebrated your birth, signed a piece of paper acknowledging him as your pops?

If you all about the social aspect, materialistic, acceptance aspect about it cool more power to you. But if you think the end to be all is ok im committed its forever cause i signed a paper, wear a ring, had a celebration therefore=marriage and lifelong bond and forever. Better save up your duckets cause you gonna need em for that divorce attorney and those years of child support and/or alimony. All that stuff is irreevant its the time and the actions and doings that will determine your marriage bond family structure, not some dusty pictures on the mantle, or a ring, or a video or a celebration.

Thats is one of the reasons ppl fail at life, they think all these social norms, events, material, and validity makes things poof happen. That along with many many many other aspects, but this one is a main one. No wedding/justice of peace/wedding/huge extravaganza< true feelings emotions,bonds and actions and acting out proving your love. All else is irrelevant and only holds the value the individuals involved place on it ie the ring/ceremony etc.

Just like i said with school. The walk across the stage is just that, a way to show others, and seek validity, and social acceptance from others. It was the commitment to studying passing making of good grades that achieved the goal of graduation. Not a party, not a acceptance of admittance, not the signing of the student loans. All that does is shows others, give a validation, to others im going to school i was accepted.

 

[ldj]

Originally Posted by ksteezy

Originally Posted by Mrsouthernhospitality

Originally Posted by ksteezy

Mrsouthernhospitality - how old are you?...not trying to bash you but maybe you haven't mature enough to make that step, can't say I blame you, just like you I held of onthe idea of marriage for a looooong time....only difference is I'm not afraid to admit I was thinking like a little boy....it is what it is, just don't spit that none-sense about your relationship >>>>> ANY marriage

Any good marriage >>>>>>> any good bf/gf relationship, let us be serious..

 at not being mature enough?
Im 25 going on 26 in October 
and my girl is the same age I dont know how could I make it any clearer 

that we both made this decision and came into an agreement

im not the only man that feels like that and shes not the only women that feels 

that way 

the crazy part about your argument is that you think there are not

any sensible,mature and responsible adults that view it the same way as me

you cant even show me a poll that says 100% of people man or women say that marriage is necessary 

any good marriage ======= any good bf/gf relationship 

only difference is a ring and it helps on your taxes

to me the American court system benefits of you marriage more then you do 

Im also going to keep saying my relationship >>>>>>>>>>>>>any marriage

its plenty of married couples that dont know $#!@ about each other 

im pretty sure there are tons of 4#!@%% marriages right now

weather married or not you deal with the same core issues 

 @ not being mature enough like everybody wants to take the same route as you 

Dude THE only difference is NOT the ring, that's your problem and that alone shows your and your girls maturity level if ya can't see passed that and all the legalities of it, it's a bond, a blessing, "till death do us part" does that not mean anything to you....when I stopped thinking about all the legalities of it and the vanity that came with what ring my wife would like I started seeing things different...you donot understand that prior to my marriage I felt alot like you, why do you think it took me 10 years to marry her?...but the second I said the words "I do" and she repeated them to me in front of a priest, something change in me and in our relationship, call me crazy but that bond we had built over 10 years is alot stronger now than it was before our marriage....THAT my friend is something you won't understand till you yourself get married....and the fact that you try to null my argument being that I've been on both sides of the spectrum is why I said you still need to grow up....you calling marriage a "status, title, a ring" that's all immaturity and inexperience speaking.

I think what he is trying to say is that ppl say that the ring/ceremony/contract=what marriage is all about and it doesnt. All those things are social symbolisms to prove to others what you vowed with marriage to be true. And i can only speak for  myself in saying that isnt true. And it was the time the ten years that made you guys bond love strong, the ring etc had nothing to do with it. Its just you have concieved your mind to believe that it did. And the whole death do us part in todays sociey is a joke. If you/your significant other lied/cheated/decieved etc to one another 99% of you guys and society would be headed to divorce court. And last time i checked if you cheated/lied/etc you dont just up and die. So that would mean that it isnt till death. And before you say i would never/they would never do that. that isnt the point the point is you vowed that under no circumstances other then demise would you ever be apart/seperate be less committed, lose love etc. And we all no that this isnt true. And a piece of paper/ring/ceremony doesnt make it true.

Marriage is meant to be more than social acceptance, approval,validity in others, prove show to others the bond between ppl. But a wedding is social, the pact is validity, and the ring is proof/showing to others. Which indirectly contridicts what was said in the vows.

If you truly love care for someone and are committed to them a contract/ring/wedding doesnt prove anything. It just shows others, displays to others the fact that you said it stated it. It doesnt show prove anything its time in, the actions, the things you do moving foward that show prove those things.

Its like i said before, i could sign my kids birth certificate, throw a big party, handout cigars and announce im about to be a daddy. How does that show prove that i will have an active role and a commitment in my kids life? This happens all the time albiet a majority of you guys this has happen to (single mother guys) So do you guys feel you who are products of no fathers being around, feel like your pops made a commitment and had a undying love for you and was there for you just cause he celebrated your birth, signed a piece of paper acknowledging him as your pops?

If you all about the social aspect, materialistic, acceptance aspect about it cool more power to you. But if you think the end to be all is ok im committed its forever cause i signed a paper, wear a ring, had a celebration therefore=marriage and lifelong bond and forever. Better save up your duckets cause you gonna need em for that divorce attorney and those years of child support and/or alimony. All that stuff is irreevant its the time and the actions and doings that will determine your marriage bond family structure, not some dusty pictures on the mantle, or a ring, or a video or a celebration.

Thats is one of the reasons ppl fail at life, they think all these social norms, events, material, and validity makes things poof happen. That along with many many many other aspects, but this one is a main one. No wedding/justice of peace/wedding/huge extravaganza< true feelings emotions,bonds and actions and acting out proving your love. All else is irrelevant and only holds the value the individuals involved place on it ie the ring/ceremony etc.

Just like i said with school. The walk across the stage is just that, a way to show others, and seek validity, and social acceptance from others. It was the commitment to studying passing making of good grades that achieved the goal of graduation. Not a party, not a acceptance of admittance, not the signing of the student loans. All that does is shows others, give a validation, to others im going to school i was accepted.

 

[ksteezy]

Originally Posted by Al Audi

yea 1st year is like the best though, everyone says that

man id love to see this thread 5, even 10 years from now with the same ppl updated an see how we feel by then.

can't say that applies to two people who been together for a decade already ^^^bro..And to answer your question, yes we've had 4 breaks, shes had other boyfriends and I've had othe girlfriends..lived up the single life and always found our way back, it was time to stop playing games and solidify our relationship, something it wasn't before.

 

[ksteezy]

Originally Posted by Al Audi

yea 1st year is like the best though, everyone says that

man id love to see this thread 5, even 10 years from now with the same ppl updated an see how we feel by then.

can't say that applies to two people who been together for a decade already ^^^bro..And to answer your question, yes we've had 4 breaks, shes had other boyfriends and I've had othe girlfriends..lived up the single life and always found our way back, it was time to stop playing games and solidify our relationship, something it wasn't before.

 

[patrick bateman]

Originally Posted by I AM THAT DUDE

Originally Posted by 10508 Cardo Jr Ln

Originally Posted by nocomment6

 this my new shht, i aint callin em B's and H's no more! straight "get back, you depreciating asset" 

 on some "you're stock is dropping by the minute while mine rises"

But how is your's rising though? Do you not age?

 

[patrick bateman]

Originally Posted by I AM THAT DUDE

Originally Posted by 10508 Cardo Jr Ln

Originally Posted by nocomment6

 this my new shht, i aint callin em B's and H's no more! straight "get back, you depreciating asset" 

 on some "you're stock is dropping by the minute while mine rises"

But how is your's rising though? Do you not age?

 

[651akathepaul]

It is what it is now guys. The perception of marriage and what it means has been lost, changed, skewed, and/or misinterpreted. Things have changed from the 50's and there will always be those that believe in marriage, and now, more that don't.

Those that don't, that's perfectly fine, but the arguments of the ring and marriage as simply a status lacks the depth and insight that the symbol of the ring in a marriage and its unrelenting bond represent. It's something that is getting lost with time.

 

[651akathepaul]

It is what it is now guys. The perception of marriage and what it means has been lost, changed, skewed, and/or misinterpreted. Things have changed from the 50's and there will always be those that believe in marriage, and now, more that don't.

Those that don't, that's perfectly fine, but the arguments of the ring and marriage as simply a status lacks the depth and insight that the symbol of the ring in a marriage and its unrelenting bond represent. It's something that is getting lost with time.

 

[ksteezy]

Originally Posted by LDJ

Originally Posted by ksteezy

Originally Posted by Mrsouthernhospitality

 at not being mature enough?
Im 25 going on 26 in October 
and my girl is the same age I dont know how could I make it any clearer 

that we both made this decision and came into an agreement

im not the only man that feels like that and shes not the only women that feels 

that way 

the crazy part about your argument is that you think there are not

any sensible,mature and responsible adults that view it the same way as me

you cant even show me a poll that says 100% of people man or women say that marriage is necessary 

any good marriage ======= any good bf/gf relationship 

only difference is a ring and it helps on your taxes

to me the American court system benefits of you marriage more then you do 

Im also going to keep saying my relationship >>>>>>>>>>>>>any marriage

its plenty of married couples that dont know $#!@ about each other 

im pretty sure there are tons of 4#!@%% marriages right now

weather married or not you deal with the same core issues 

 @ not being mature enough like everybody wants to take the same route as you 

Dude THE only difference is NOT the ring, that's your problem and that alone shows your and your girls maturity level if ya can't see passed that and all the legalities of it, it's a bond, a blessing, "till death do us part" does that not mean anything to you....when I stopped thinking about all the legalities of it and the vanity that came with what ring my wife would like I started seeing things different...you donot understand that prior to my marriage I felt alot like you, why do you think it took me 10 years to marry her?...but the second I said the words "I do" and she repeated them to me in front of a priest, something change in me and in our relationship, call me crazy but that bond we had built over 10 years is alot stronger now than it was before our marriage....THAT my friend is something you won't understand till you yourself get married....and the fact that you try to null my argument being that I've been on both sides of the spectrum is why I said you still need to grow up....you calling marriage a "status, title, a ring" that's all immaturity and inexperience speaking.

I think what he is trying to say is that ppl say that the ring/ceremony/contract=what marriage is all about and it doesnt. All those things are social symbolisms to prove to others what you vowed with marriage to be true. And i can only speak for  myself in saying that isnt true. And it was the time the ten years that made you guys bond love strong, the ring etc had nothing to do with it. Its just you have concieved your mind to believe that it did. And the whole death do us part in todays sociey is a joke. If you/your significant other lied/cheated/decieved etc to one another 99% of you guys and society would be headed to divorce court. And last time i checked if you cheated/lied/etc you dont just up and die. So that would mean that it isnt till death. And before you say i would never/they would never do that. that isnt the point the point is you vowed that under no circumstances other then demise would you ever be apart/seperate be less committed, lose love etc. And we all no that this isnt true. And a piece of paper/ring/ceremony doesnt make it true.

Marriage is meant to be more than social acceptance, approval,validity in others, prove show to others the bond between ppl. But a wedding is social, the pact is validity, and the ring is proof/showing to others. Which indirectly contridicts what was said in the vows.

If you truly love care for someone and are committed to them a contract/ring/wedding doesnt prove anything. It just shows others, displays to others the fact that you said it stated it. It doesnt show prove anything its time in, the actions, the things you do moving foward that show prove those things.

Its like i said before, i could sign my kids birth certificate, throw a big party, handout cigars and announce im about to be a daddy. How does that show prove that i will have an active role and a commitment in my kids life? This happens all the time albiet a majority of you guys this has happen to (single mother guys) So do you guys feel you who are products of no fathers being around, feel like your pops made a commitment and had a undying love for you and was there for you just cause he celebrated your birth, signed a piece of paper acknowledging him as your pops?

If you all about the social aspect, materialistic, acceptance aspect about it cool more power to you. But if you think the end to be all is ok im committed its forever cause i signed a paper, wear a ring, had a celebration therefore=marriage and lifelong bond and forever. Better save up your duckets cause you gonna need em for that divorce attorney and those years of child support and/or alimony. All that stuff is irreevant its the time and the actions and doings that will determine your marriage bond family structure, not some dusty pictures on the mantle, or a ring, or a video or a celebration.

Thats is one of the reasons ppl fail at life, they think all these social norms, events, material, and validity makes things poof happen. That along with many many many other aspects, but this one is a main one. No wedding/justice of peace/wedding/huge extravaganza< true feelings emotions,bonds and actions and acting out proving your love. All else is irrelevant and only holds the value the individuals involved place on it ie the ring/ceremony etc.

Just like i said with school. The walk across the stage is just that, a way to show others, and seek validity, and social acceptance from others. It was the commitment to studying passing making of good grades that achieved the goal of graduation. Not a party, not a acceptance of admittance, not the signing of the student loans. All that does is shows others, give a validation, to others im going to school i was accepted.

I think that's the problem ^^^bro, you are stuck being a rebel, trying to go so hard against what you believe society is pushing you to do, like I stated before, to me marriage is a bond/promise I made in front of God to my WIFE, before it's a a phony party with weding favors and some fancy rings, I could have done it just us two with noone else around with some pop-tart rings and as long as we had God's blessing it would mean the same thing....open up your mind.