Post a sports headline that will never happen

[efil 4 rekal]

Reggie Miller Nominated For NAACP Image Award

Michael Jordan Hands Out Free Shoes To Inner City Youth

Amy Winehouse Becomes Latest Fling for Yankees' Jeter

Lebron: "Nas Won"

 

[clutchshooter]

"Raptors Play Defense".

.

 

[theotherai9]

Ron Artest to make gospel CD.

 

[nychiphophippo]

Front page of the paper: Two unknown forms of satellites detected in the southeast





Back cover: Josh Childress Shaves Afro

 

[gatorb807]

Buckeyes Defeat (insert SEC team) to win BCS Title!

 

[80jerryrice80]

49ers win their 6th superbowl title

 

[inine5]

"Michael Jordan Signs with Starbury: 1st Series of Low-Priced Sneakers set to Release in 2009"

 

[prospect904]

"Mike Tyson set for missions trip in Africa"

 

[sick ik 23]

some of these are pretty good/funny.

"'Sonics will stay in Seattle' says Clay Bennet and David Stern"

 

[mugzbo]

I'll kill myself the day Peter Gammons says "The Yankees are better than the Red Sux"

#%++ Peter old fart Gammons.
#%++ John Kruk too, ol' cheeseburger guzzling fattie

 

[friendliest ghost]

In an effort to court a more Latin fan base, the New York Mets have signed their first and only Puerto Rican player.

 

[kwame brwn]

Without a doubt he is the most dominant player in the league today.

about myself

 

[androoow]

this thread is hilarious.

 

[onewearz]

 

[trillipinotrapstar]

"Falcons win the Super Bowl!"

 

[kingkb34]

Lebron: "Nas Won"

 

[ballinboykz]

Originally Posted by Clutchshooter

"Raptors Play Defense".

.

 

[5am6oody72]

#%++ John Kruk too, ol' cheeseburger guzzling fattie


How do you guzzle a cheeseburger?

 

[DeadsetAce]

Originally Posted by 5am6oody72

#%++ John Kruk too, ol' cheeseburger guzzling fattie

How do you guzzle a cheeseburger?

knowing kruk, he prolly puts it in a blender with some nuggets, fries, soda, ice cream, and pizza and makes himself a nice smoothie...which he can guzzle

 

[darthska]

^ Speaking of cheeseburgers and blenders, the grossest 'food' (and I use the term lightly) I ever saw was during last year's Floor Wars on campus.

Floor Wars started in like '95 or something, and it takes place at the end of the year. Each floor of each dorm is a team; not everyone has toparticipate,but if you want to be a part of Floor Wars, you have to participate on your floor's team.

They just have a bunch of challenges over one week; some are athletic (3-pt shooting contest, punt/pass/kick contest, longest soccer goal contest, etc.), someare just asking for trouble (like the Human Pyramid contest), and of course, there are food eating contests.

The final food contest was to see who could drink the most mystery shakes.

These shakes... were flat out... DISGUSTING. The people in charge of the contests would throw in... like... a McD's Big Mac, a couple scoops of ice cream,a splash of prune juice, some Gatorade, a little milk, some caramel syrup, an apricot, some Oreos, and some cocktail shrimp... and that would be one shake.

They made like 4 dozen of these monstrosities, and would you believe that almost every single one of them was consumed?

Me? Sign me up for the 3-pt contest, mark that down as a victory for us, and I'm through. I am not eating... errr, 'drinking'... crap like that.

 

[rasmekpeace]

Something we'll never see:

"Former NBA player Bison Dele Found"

by Jay Mariotti
Chicago Trbune

Last night, the Miami Police received a startling phone call from former Utah Jazz Center, John Amaechi, claiming he found the body of Bison Dele in hiscloset. Bison Dele, formerly known as Brian Williams, was found by Amechi in his master bedroom closet after Amechi noticed a foul odor ruminating in his room.Amechi described the scene as a bloody mess. Evident at the crime scene were shotgun shells and a jersey worn by Dele, of former New Jersey Nets player, JaysonWilliams. No further details are available at this time.

 

[downtown43]

[h3]ESPN Top Headlines[/h3]

• "NBA star Dwight Howard (now Abdul Salaam-Raoul) pledges Nation of Islam, journeys to Mecca"
• "Former NFL star Adam 'Pacman' Jones tours with Bill Cosby, speaks to inner-city black youth"
• "Gilbert Arenas: 'No comment"
• "Gilbert Arenas interviewed on 60 Minutes, remains aloof: 'I'm not going to get into my personal life"

 

[lobotomybeats]

"John Daly Involved in Steroid Scandal"

 

[ballinboykz]

"Chad Johnson picks a team he wants to play for"

 

[kb8sandiego]

Ducks win the championship!!
CP, my dude, it happened in Anaheim.

"Ladainian Tomlinson sparks controversy in new Nike Sparq Training Commercial: "My bench is warmer thanyours...?"