My best friend is really paranoid vol. C'mon son (female related)

nerd.gif
pics??? i dnt see em.  ya boy needs to stop being insecure and just talk to you straight up. 
 
Originally Posted by Stillmatic23

You need to fall back and respect your mans position fam.


All that needs to be said.  If that was your girl and your best friend doing $*+! like that, you'd know how it feels.  One of your boys texting your girl everyday having little conversations all the time.  You come home while they're studying and they immediately leave.  It's not hard to see why he's paranoid.
 
tell him to man up and stop being a +%*[email protected] you his man, you wouldn't do him dirty so he shouldn't worry, but that may speak more to his personality...in the sense that if the role was reversed, he'd do you dirty...
 
how long have you known each person?
they've only been dating 6 months and he's your best friend and roomate?... and he didn't know that you and her were close?

I would think that he knew how close you two were prior to getting into a relationship.


that being said... if you value HIS friendship as much as HER friendship.. at the very least, you need to talk with him and let him say his peace.
 
Out of respect for my man, and his relationship, I wouldn't be all buddy buddy w/ his girl. Anything outside of studying and texts/calls (on some "Did you do XYZ, when is XYZ due" etc.) type stuff I wouldn't even interact w/ her like that. Not about to be texting my mans girl all the time. And I def wouldn't have walked her to her car. That's what she has a BF for. Eventhough it was innocent, @!#% just LOOKED sketchy. And that's all you need for the seed to be planted, next thing you know none of y'all are cool w/ eachother or there is thick tension between y'all. Just fall back man.
 
Originally Posted by dreClark

Out of respect for my man, and his relationship, I wouldn't be all buddy buddy w/ his girl. Anything outside of studying and texts/calls (on some "Did you do XYZ, when is XYZ due" etc.) type stuff I wouldn't even interact w/ her like that. Not about to be texting my mans girl all the time. And I def wouldn't have walked her to her car. That's what she has a BF for. Eventhough it was innocent, @!#% just LOOKED sketchy. And that's all you need for the seed to be planted, next thing you know none of y'all are cool w/ eachother or there is thick tension between y'all. Just fall back man.


This...

OP how long have you been friends with the girl?

Did you know her before he did? or before they got together?
 
From everything you said OP it seems like you are almost better friends with the girl then your boy. It also seems like you really don't want to stop talking to the girl.

I am guessing you are just going to keep things the way they are until the summer then. When he goes away you won't have to deal with both sides so you should have next to nothing to worry about. When your boy leaves since he doesn't talk to you anyway about the situation he wont bring it up and you can still be friends with her. So it seems as if no change is what you want to do.
 
Originally Posted by dreClark

Out of respect for my man, and his relationship, I wouldn't be all buddy buddy w/ his girl. Anything outside of studying and texts/calls (on some "Did you do XYZ, when is XYZ due" etc.) type stuff I wouldn't even interact w/ her like that. Not about to be texting my mans girl all the time. And I def wouldn't have walked her to her car. That's what she has a BF for. Eventhough it was innocent, @!#% just LOOKED sketchy. And that's all you need for the seed to be planted, next thing you know none of y'all are cool w/ eachother or there is thick tension between y'all. Just fall back man.



We had a test in the same class, I was driving to campus so obviously I'm going to give her a ride. We can't walk down to my car together?

We were friends before they got together.
 
Originally Posted by KingJames23

Originally Posted by dreClark

Out of respect for my man, and his relationship, I wouldn't be all buddy buddy w/ his girl. Anything outside of studying and texts/calls (on some "Did you do XYZ, when is XYZ due" etc.) type stuff I wouldn't even interact w/ her like that. Not about to be texting my mans girl all the time. And I def wouldn't have walked her to her car. That's what she has a BF for. Eventhough it was innocent, @!#% just LOOKED sketchy. And that's all you need for the seed to be planted, next thing you know none of y'all are cool w/ eachother or there is thick tension between y'all. Just fall back man.



We had a test in the same class, I was driving to campus so obviously I'm going to give her a ride. We can't walk down to my car together?

We were friends before they got together.
If this is the case then it completely changes the story. 

You are more loyal to her then him.  Aka who cares what he thinks.  He is now the jealous outsider as opposed to you being portrayed like that.

Tell her to go to her man and reassure him that you guys are only friends and nothing but friends.
 
^but he describes the guy as his "BEST" friend...

at the very least... his best friend and roommate deserves a talk
 
Originally Posted by KingJames23

We had a test in the same class, I was driving to campus so obviously I'm going to give her a ride. We can't walk down to my car together?
You didn't say that before though. They way you said it, I thought you walked her to her car, then she left.
We were friends before they got together.
Yeah, but still. It's a slippery slope man just gotta be careful not to overstep your bounds. Talk it out man to man w/ your boy.
 
^^
Thats what I'm saying...

To me it seems like it doesn't matter how your "best friend" feels about it. You're not going to change anything about your relationship with his girlfriend. You don't really want to change it. Plus the way you act is how someone would act if they were "feeling" a girl and trying to get with them IMO...

It sounds like you don't value your friendship with your "bestfriend" as much as you do the friendship with his girl...

Personally if that was my bestfriend I wouldn't talk to/spend time his girl that much regardless if I was friends with her before they got together. To each his own...

I really think you need to analyze which relationship you value more and go from there....
 
Originally Posted by YoUNg bR3aD

^^
Thats what I'm saying...

To me it seems like it doesn't matter how your "best friend" feels about it. You're not going to change anything about your relationship with his girlfriend. You don't really want to change it. Plus the way you act is how someone would act if they were "feeling" a girl and trying to get with them IMO...

It sounds like you don't value your friendship with your "bestfriend" as much as you do the friendship with his girl...

Personally if that was my bestfriend I wouldn't talk to/spend time his girl that much regardless if I was friends with her before they got together. To each his own...

I really think you need to analyze which relationship you value more and go from there....
This about wraps it up
 
Jking0821 wrote:
YoUNg bR3aD wrote:
^^
Thats what I'm saying...

To me it seems like it doesn't matter how your "best friend" feels about it. You're not going to change anything about your relationship with his girlfriend. You don't really want to change it. Plus the way you act is how someone would act if they were "feeling" a girl and trying to get with them IMO...

It sounds like you don't value your friendship with your "bestfriend" as much as you do the friendship with his girl...

Personally if that was my bestfriend I wouldn't talk to/spend time his girl that much regardless if I was friends with her before they got together. To each his own...

I really think you need to analyze which relationship you value more and go from there....
This about wraps it up



x2....Plus notice how this guy is responding to and justifying his action after anyone makes a good point. Some people just cant admit they are wrong
  
 
Originally Posted by jerseymizzle

i don't see anything wrong with it.

i mean, me, if that's my boy and i trust him, i'd rather have him friends with my girl then some ruthless dude who couldn't care less about me.
Yeah, but it's obvious that his boy doesn't trust him, so.......
 
definitely talk to your boy. in addition, i would try and back off a bit. like i'm friends with a couple of my best friends' girlfriends, but i would in no way be texting them often, spending hella time with them when my boy isn't around, or anything like that. you just don't do it...i mean as innocent as you may think it is, that's how you put yourself in a bad spot to do something grimey. so i'd def. try and cut back on that stuff.
 
Originally Posted by jhobson5

Jking0821 wrote:
YoUNg bR3aD wrote:
^^
Thats what I'm saying...

To me it seems like it doesn't matter how your "best friend" feels about it. You're not going to change anything about your relationship with his girlfriend. You don't really want to change it. Plus the way you act is how someone would act if they were "feeling" a girl and trying to get with them IMO...

It sounds like you don't value your friendship with your "bestfriend" as much as you do the friendship with his girl...

Personally if that was my bestfriend I wouldn't talk to/spend time his girl that much regardless if I was friends with her before they got together. To each his own...

I really think you need to analyze which relationship you value more and go from there....
This about wraps it up



x2....Plus notice how this guy is responding to and justifying his action after anyone makes a good point. Some people just cant admit they are wrong
  

Thats why I came to the conclusion that he doesn't really care what the "bestfriend" thinks or how he feels.

He isn't even taking what people are saying into consideration...

Like when people say "put yourself in his shoes"...

I don't think he is doing that...

Honestly if the tables were turned he would be salty that his "bestfriend" was acting that way towards his girl.
 
I'm in a similar situation myself but my boy does not show that he cares if i'm with his girl or not. At the end of the day when she is heading her way and im heading home she tells me that they got into an arguement and this always happens.
 
If you tell your side of the story and it STILL sounds like you're doing something wrong.... then you're doing something wrong.

Plus why wait until you leave to personally hand her a gift? Why not do it earlier? How did it not come up with your boy that you bought her a CD?
 
So what ya'll are saying is that I've pretty much got to choose?

If I change my friendship with her, she'll get pissed and that'll pretty much end it.
 
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