I don't usually do this, but a GIRL thread Vol: Prego

[throwback1718]

ok im going to try to make this as short as possible because I know some of you lazy dudes dont like to read.

Ok new years eve my girl started feeling really sick getting unbearable cramps and stomach pains, we kind of figured it was pregnancy pains because she missedher Period. A few days ago she asked me what I wanted to do if she was, I said I don't know I'm not ready for a baby, I'm barely ready to even takecare of myself
she says
"if you don't want to keep it i'll get an abortion I don't want to force a baby on you"
I don't know if she really meant it at the time. But I said okay
Yesterday she said "IF I am, I'm gonna keep it"

so today I finally get the home pregnancy test. I kind of figured she was prego anyway.
the test comes up as positive. I get back home. and she hits me up on aim. and sends me an email of some "I am pregnant " website, it showed apicture of a embryo that would be 2 months old. (which is approx how far along she is)

The whole time she has been asking me, what do I want to do I have been saying I dont know, because I really can't process the thought of trying to takecare of a baby at 21 years old. I don't want to fight to keep clothes on my child's back. and taking care of her and myself

So she asks me, on AIM
her "did you see the pictures?"
me "yeah, wow thats crazy"
her "yeah after seeing that its hard to imagine the procedure you have to go through to get rid of it"
her "sooo... what's the verdict?"
me "A-word?"
her "wow, still? goodbye"

so we speak on the phone after arguing and yelling, she say's she didnt expect this from me, and I'm the last person that she thought would have saidthat. This means that we're over. and that i'm worse than some dead beat cat that lives down the block. and any REAL dude would have detested it, but Ididn't.

My question is am I really such a bad dude for not wanting to have a baby yet? Because I really dont believe so.
But whats you dudes take on this?

 

[jt air jt]

I am pro life. pics of baby momma?

 

[i d0nt pass]

My dude Im going to the same thing esp shes not my girl she a JO

x 10000

she wanna keep it and I dont..looks like someones getting a surprise "shove down the stairs" soon

 

[htwn hitman]

man enough to do it be man enough to take care of it IMO

 

[recognize game]

Originally Posted by htwn hitman

man enough to do it be man enough to take care of it IMO

how i would handle it

 

[bjamez20]

if you 2 are having this convo over aim, then that just shows neither of you are ready to be parents. unfortunately, its ultimately her decision

 

[cobra kai]

Originally Posted by I D0NT PASS

My dude Im going to the same thing esp shes not my girl she a JO

x 10000

she wanna keep it and I dont..looks like someones getting a surprise "shove down the stairs" soon

You sir deserve a

and a huge L for the circumstance and because you obviously shoulda PASSed.

To the OP..... Trip her.

nah, be a man and handle your responsibility.

I'm catholic, but not pro choice or pro life. I'm pro circumstance and if you %%@#** up but can handle the responsibility. then you need to do that.

 

[throwback1718]

she IS my girl, and been together about 2 years now, of course we wanted to have a kid eventually but not this soon in the game.

I just don't wanna be struggling. Wanna have my feet planted in my career. all that before I have a seed.
I wanna be in my kid life i dont wanna have him/her for the weekend or every other weekend.

I wanna be there full time.

now she saying IF she decides to have it, she not gonna let me be in the child's life

if you 2 are having this convo over aim, then that just shows neither of you are ready to be parents. unfortunately, its ultimately her decision
yeah the convo started online, but definitely finished over the phone.
I always told her its her choice, and what ever she chooses, I'll be right along side her.

oh yeah, no pics.

 

[scotthallwithapick]

I would never do it to my child but I am strongly pro choice. I say you 2 need to have a face to face sit down. And if at the end she wants to keep up you haveto man up. You went raw deal with it

 

[saintvitus07]

Originally Posted by bjamez20

if you 2 are having this convo over aim, then that just shows neither of you are ready to be parents. unfortunately, its ultimately her decision

Pretty much.

But no, I don't think you should feel "wrong" for thinking an abortion is the best decision in this situation. Discussing what could amount to ahuman life over instant messenger is...

. I don't even have thewords. You should feel wrong for that, and you owe it to her and yourself to discuss this in person. Let her know your reasons.

 

[throwback1718]

Originally Posted by SaintVitus07

Originally Posted by bjamez20

if you 2 are having this convo over aim, then that just shows neither of you are ready to be parents. unfortunately, its ultimately her decision

Pretty much.

But no, I don't think you should feel "wrong" for thinking an abortion is the best decision in this situation. Discussing what could amount to a human life over instant messenger is...

. I don't even have the words. You should feel wrong for that, and you owe it to her and yourself to discuss this in person. Let her know your reasons.

dudes, I was ASKED on instant messenger, I didn't initiate anything. she ALREADY knew my reasons from JUMP
she knows everything I feel about the matter.
and like I said in the end it was a telephone convo. I'm pretty sure she doesn't want to talk it over in person as she's saying
"I have the solution to this"
and that she's disgusted with me, and how could I agree with her to do the abortion.

 

[brandon3000]

I don't think your wrong at all..
this is your life to be honest with you. For some reason I keep thinkin of Cam rappin about "where I begged Kim to have the abortion.."

Talk to ya girl and be real with her like look I love you but this isn't the time. Let her hear you out and let her know why your not ready or if youbelieve she's not. Your in a serious situation and I wish the best for you. In the mean time tho, not even tryna be funny with you listen to the 1st verseof Joe Buddens "I Couldn't Help It" (Produced By The Klasix) and let me know what you think of it. Not that Joe Budden is the 1st person to turnto in these circumstances but yea let me know what you think. I'ma post the lyrics here too cuz I JUST heard this song and it makes me think about yasituation.

"We had a beautiful relationship at one point
But then, that #$#$ changed with the quickness
Maybe cause I was !!+%!*' other +!%*!%@
Or maybe we had no busniess havin' busniess
Not the girl that I would want to raise kids with
But still that #$#$ happened regardless
I was so young, back then so heartless
And the #$#$ I was thinkin' could of caught me some charges
Listen, I tried to talk to her normally
That #$#$ didn't work for one second, she was on to me
I tried to explain, how I ain't have a dollar to my name
Pursuin' this rap #$#$, chasin' fame
Young dude stressed in the hood like Je-sus
I ain't ready for no child but she was
When you, piss poor get to havin' sick thoughts
While the chick probably sittin' there thinkin' bout marriage
I'm thinkin' abortion like a savage
On purpose accident to have a miscarriage
Her a mother of mine I couldn't end up seein'
Plus what type of mother would you end up bein'
You already a physco, I wouldn't let that pass
I ain't think lifetime bond, I thought fat @!%
All them times you were pregnant and miserable
All them fights we had that got physical
Everytime I sent you packin', pissed at you
Like I ain't want to live wit you, yeah I kind of planned that
Ain't considerate, sounds just like me
Then you put someone out that looks just like me
I grabbed my little dude up, looked 'em in his eyes
And you can't understand right now I apologize
How could I not want you here, be that selfish
+%%+ was on my mind at the time, my bad I Couldn't Help It."

 

[uptown roamer]

Originally Posted by htwn hitman

man enough to do it be man enough to take care of it IMO

Basically.

Time to grow up, OP...

 

[brandon3000]

Originally Posted by Uptown Roamer

Originally Posted by htwn hitman

man enough to do it be man enough to take care of it IMO

Basically.




Time to grow up, OP...

$+%#$+ is sayin that but IN THAT SITUATION a lot of these dudes wouldn't be practicing what they preach. I thinkbefore yall start takin ya stances you need to realize that you can never know how you would react in any situation until your actually in it. but whatever. alot of yall stay frontin

 

[htwn hitman]

Originally Posted by Brandon3000

Originally Posted by Uptown Roamer

Originally Posted by htwn hitman

man enough to do it be man enough to take care of it IMO

Basically.




Time to grow up, OP...

$+%#$+ is sayin that but IN THAT SITUATION a lot of these dudes wouldn't be practicing what they preach. I think before yall start takin ya stances you need to realize that you can never know how you would react in any situation until your actually in it. but whatever. a lot of yall stay frontin

BEEN THERE i talked her out of the abortion

 

[pj and bompton]

Originally Posted by Uptown Roamer

Originally Posted by htwn hitman

man enough to do it be man enough to take care of it IMO

Basically.

Time to grow up, OP...

 

[hennysmash]

If you dont want it walk away, she cant respect you enough to consider your position then step. take care of the baby from the sideline, make sure you theretho so that she wont get the courts involved

 

[uptown roamer]

Originally Posted by Brandon3000

Originally Posted by Uptown Roamer

Originally Posted by htwn hitman

man enough to do it be man enough to take care of it IMO

Basically.




Time to grow up, OP...

$+%#$+ is sayin that but IN THAT SITUATION a lot of these dudes wouldn't be practicing what they preach. I think before yall start takin ya stances you need to realize that you can never know how you would react in any situation until your actually in it. but whatever. a lot of yall stay frontin

Actually I would. I've had "scares" before (not the same thing, I know) and each time I felt like "Ok, if she is pregnant, it's time togrow the %$+# up". Abortion was never an option to me.

I'm not sayin' I'm better than the OP or anything, that's just how I felt...

 

[throwback1718]

Originally Posted by hennySMASH

If you dont want it walk away, she cant respect you enough to consider your position then step. take care of the baby from the sideline, make sure you there tho so that she wont get the courts involved

ehhh im not the type to have a seed and just be a part time pops. I gotta be there, especially growin up in a crib where my pops is around.

she saying that she dont know if she'd go through the abortion.
but I REALLY dont understand the necessity of saying we cant ever be together because I chose for an abortion.
or even saying she wont allow me to be in the babys life because

" how you gonna wanna be a part of the baby's life after you said you didnt want to keep it?, I'd just be a single parent. "

I think she going overboard with that.

 

[brandon3000]

Originally Posted by Uptown Roamer

Originally Posted by Brandon3000

Uptown Roamer wrote:

---

htwn hitman wrote:

---

man enough to do it be man enough to take care of it IMO

Basically.










Time to grow up, OP...

$+%#$+ is sayin that but IN THAT SITUATION a lot of these dudes wouldn't be practicing what they preach. I think
before yall start takin ya stances you need to realize that you can never know how you would react in any situation until your actually in it. but whatever. a
lot of yall stay frontin




Actually I would. I've had "scares" before (not the same thing, I know) and each time I felt like "Ok, if she is pregnant, it's time to grow the %$%% up". Abortion was never an option to me.




I'm not sayin' I'm better than the OP or anything, that's just how I felt...


I understand that, but without opening a can of worms here... I just feel like okay, if this dude is a young guy, less -20, he in the other thread talkin abouthow much he get for unemployment, but now talkin about reluctantly having a child. My opinion is just %$*% don't just feel like u gotta "man up".Its too many babys wit babys (not sayin that dude is) but yea thats how i feel. But yea some cats would be willing to step it up and I applaud them, Idon't know that personally I'm there just yet. But yea thats all i'm sayin, like it could go either way. But I respect others opinion you kno

 

[hennysmash]

Originally Posted by throwback1718

Originally Posted by hennySMASH

If you dont want it walk away, she cant respect you enough to consider your position then step. take care of the baby from the sideline, make sure you there tho so that she wont get the courts involved

ehhh im not the type to have a seed and just be a part time pops. I gotta be there, especially growin up in a crib where my pops is around.

she saying that she dont know if she'd go through the abortion.
but I REALLY dont understand the necessity of saying we cant ever be together because I chose for an abortion.
or even saying she wont allow me to be in the babys life because

" how you gonna wanna be a part of the baby's life after you said you didnt want to keep it?, I'd just be a single parent. "

I think she going overboard with that.

Its not like you're ready to be raising a kid anyway (from what you've told. yea that sounds a bit overboard. I hope you tellin ol girlall of this

 

[uptown roamer]

Yea, I feel you.

I definitely don't think he's wrong in how he feels, though. No matter what the situation, havin' kids can be hard for anybody...

 

[spidermachine916]

what about the other a-word? Adoption?
i mean if you both aren't ready, why not?

 

[throwback1718]

Originally Posted by Brandon3000

Time to grow up, OP...

$+%#$+ is sayin that but IN THAT SITUATION a lot of these dudes wouldn't be practicing what they preach. I think
before yall start takin ya stances you need to realize that you can never know how you would react in any situation until your actually in it. but whatever. a
lot of yall stay frontin




Actually I would. I've had "scares" before (not the same thing, I know) and each time I felt like "Ok, if she is pregnant, it's time to grow the %$%% up". Abortion was never an option to me.




I'm not sayin' I'm better than the OP or anything, that's just how I felt...


I understand that, but without opening a can of worms here... I just feel like okay, if this dude is a young guy, less -20, he in the other thread talkin about how much he get for unemployment, but now talkin about reluctantly having a child. My opinion is just %$*% don't just feel like u gotta "man up". Its too many babys wit babys (not sayin that dude is) but yea thats how i feel. But yea some cats would be willing to step it up and I applaud them, I don't know that personally I'm there just yet. But yea thats all i'm sayin, like it could go either way. But I respect others opinion you kno


im 21, and in the unemployment thread I never said anything about how much I get bro... I just asked a question. wow, I cant respond to other threads?

I have the capability to be a good father, I KNOW I will be a good one.
but my only concern was having the child live comfortably. along with myself and the mother...
other than that, I have no issues

ME being young is a BIG factor because at the age of only 21, how much ground could I really have planted my feet in? I haven't even gotten my career ontrack yet, Im still in college.

but everyone has their own opinion, I was stuck in whether to man up and take have the baby or make a consious decision that satisfies a baby, the mother andI.

its pretty much
A: have the baby and struggle or
B:Have the baby a few years from now and everyone is pretty comfortable.

Obviously B was my choice.

 

[アミーゴ]

OP- I take it since you were together for 2 years she was on the pill?? If so did the pill fail, or did she forget to take it?

This is why I strap up even if they are on the pill...