Funniest thing someone said/read on NT?

[degenerate423]

Originally Posted by RaWeX05

KSteezy and Diego...the softest tag team since Goldust and Luna Vachon.

I'm sure everyone remembers that thread.

Post yours.

That one was pretty good

...

Originally Posted by 17

whole thread was hilarious but this post had me in tears:

"If it was my wife I'd tell the dude to rape my booty, but I'd probably poop my pants if in that situation. But before I expel my bowels in my boxers I'll clench that booty really tight. Right when he's about to stick his meat in I'll let that poop go out and push his %+%# or it'll explode with this massive mess catching him off guard. Then I'll grab whatever is closest to me, a lamp, pen, a magazine and defend myself and hopefully subdue him."

This is a close 2nd, almost 1b...

Originally Posted by CWrite78

has to be the many quotables in the BudLongTaco vs Team 909 arguments, mostly against airmag.

i remember airmag had the sig saying "ceo of team 909" and taco was like "ceo of what? homie you work at champs"

was so out of left field i was

Definitely an honorable mention...

Originally Posted by CaponeCartels

real talk its not funny when it happen to you.......last month me and my baby momma got back together so one day i wanna take her and my baby out so I call her and she didnt answer so i called her 10 more times and she still didnt answer so I went to her crib and her car was parked outside her house and it was another car a 1988 cutlass on 22 inch blocks so I knock on the door and no one came to the door but she left the door open so I just walked in so when i walk upstairs I hear a dude moaning so I open the door and i see my baby momma sucking dude up they both butt naked so i drop to my knees in shock and then he nutted on my baby momma face while im sitting right there and then he told me my kids on your baby momma face and they look better then your son so me and him started fighting and after i beat his #+% he got his gun so i dipped

I have to go with this one, had me

for almost a whole day.  If it ever gets dethroned then it'll still be a classic

...

 

[offbad]

there was the story of a computer repair guy who caught a burglar trying to jack his yaris

 

[teamjordan79]

anything every written by Cruzgangstamonte if any of the older NT'er rememebr. Every comments with that avy combo had everyone dyin 

Also Darko's troll tales were pretty amusing 

 

[John Wick]

Originally Posted by RustyShackleford

Can't remember the exact quote but it went along the lines of "I'm gonna punch you square in your chest, make your shoulders clap together" 

  

 

[put em up]

the Fat Joe street cred thread in Music...and dude started going in on Ninjahood. straight airing dude out. funniest thread ever.

 

[hellaones]

Originally Posted by CaponeCartels

Originally Posted by StonedFace

Originally Posted by Nash

That story about how the dude walked in on his girl giving some dude head, at which point he dropped to his knees and the dude said something like "my sperm on your girls face looks better than your son" and they started fighting.

that story had me in tears 

real talk its not funny when it happen to you.......last month me and my baby momma got back together so one day i wanna take her and my baby out so I call her and she didnt answer so i called her 10 more times and she still didnt answer so I went to her crib and her car was parked outside her house and it was another car a 1988 cutlass on 22 inch blocks so I knock on the door and no one came to the door but she left the door open so I just walked in so when i walk upstairs I hear a dude moaning so I open the door and i see my baby momma sucking dude up they both butt naked so i drop to my knees in shock and then he nutted on my baby momma face while im sitting right there and then he told me my kids on your baby momma face and they look better then your son so me and him started fighting and after i beat his #+% he got his gun so i dipped

yo, I think about this reply all the time 

 

[solewoman]

Originally Posted by Jhustle23

It was a picture of a guy wearing new Js and the guy had real hairy legs. And the post said something like " info on those wool calf sleeves?"

how did i miss that lol

 

[ins]

Originally Posted by omgitswes

Originally Posted by illmatic34

Originally Posted by Elpablo21

That #!$% was just out of left field in that thread.

I'm saying though. Had absolutely nothing to do with the thread

It came out of the Pookie for president thread, where we were all talking about NT reps. Dude runs in doesn't read anything anyone else said and starts talking about the real world of politics.

Then Je Ne Sais Quoi hit us with that door %!** and i lost it. Been my sig ever since.

 

[chrisblazinnj]

Originally Posted by Cole World

Forgot what thread it was but they said ..

"Ninjahood would rather buy space jams than actual space"

lol, regarding his small room

 

[ins]

http://niketalk.yuku.com/...house-vol-choices?page=1

/done

 

[aceofjays]

One of the funniest stories was when some NTer had a thread about taking a dump in public places. And dude said he was taking a dump and some dude, in a rush, burst into his stall and stood there looking at him for a min

.

 

[eiddyfouw]

Originally Posted by Degenerate423

Originally Posted by RaWeX05

This is a close 2nd, almost 1b...

Definitely an honorable mention...

Originally Posted by CaponeCartels

real talk its not funny when it happen to you.......last month me and my baby momma got back together so one day i wanna take her and my baby out so I call her and she didnt answer so i called her 10 more times and she still didnt answer so I went to her crib and her car was parked outside her house and it was another car a 1988 cutlass on 22 inch blocks so I knock on the door and no one came to the door but she left the door open so I just walked in so when i walk upstairs I hear a dude moaning so I open the door and i see my baby momma sucking dude up they both butt naked so i drop to my knees in shock and then he nutted on my baby momma face while im sitting right there and then he told me my kids on your baby momma face and they look better then your son so me and him started fighting and after i beat his #+% he got his gun so i dipped

I have to go with this one, had me

for almost a whole day.  If it ever gets dethroned then it'll still be a classic

...

I remember reading that story a while ago 

I was crying....I even copied and pasted it and emailed to a few homies.....had dudes in different countries crackin up 

 

[airjordan jb23]

Too much to quote in here

 

[mackmittenzz]

Whats the grimeiest thing you ever done thread/ cruz gangstamonte was funny, Harlem shake story, too much to mention

 

[supermanblue79]

Originally Posted by Ninjahood

"problem wit 95% of ya outfits on NT is they TERRY CLOTH charmin softlookin...like some regular hooligan can open hand 5 finger slap da fireoutta you

and all you gonna do is pick up your houndstooth paper boy derby from da floor and keep it moving wit da

face on.

ilike to look threatening, mascule and intimidating..i don't feel rightuntil a white lady is clutching her purse THAT much tighter when shewalks by me

"

Recession Proof Post-  too much gold here.

 

[extraordinary swag]

"If Deezy's paying Lebron I'm paying Dwyane Wade"

(from the things you've learned from movies thread

)
Lakersfan1 wrote: If you're a white boxer you can take 13 more rounds of a beating when the black boxer DIES in 2 rounds.

I think it was LDJ or memphisboi that was in the big girl appreciation thread talking about catching a charlie horse while smashing a big chick

, that entire thread was

one of the embarassing sexual encounters thread was filled with hilarity too

 

[coldcity]

Originally Posted by Jhustle23

It was a picture of a guy wearing new Js and the guy had real hairy legs. And the post said something like " info on those wool calf sleeves?"

#DEAD

 

[coldcity]

cake saying fam was "cashmere" in the wale=divia thread

found it http://niketalk.yuku.com/...-Vol-Yes-I-m-Mad?page=16

This man is A Joke. Point Blank Period. I go in there hours before I even speak on his cashmere behavior and see you looking for a boys fb to send him a message telling him not to have event getting up with people on here because you're a lame. Every dude from both of the events in NYC got along and rocked with each other except you. You talking real outta character my man.So let me get this straight... first it was a rumor right, then you go in another thread and cop to it blaming the people who saw you prostituting yourself out. Buy you dinner? Fam you was following Moon around the bowling alley begging him for Happy Meal My G, of course this is in between the time you were whispering sweet nothings into Shorty Pop's ear... Who of course had just sucked someone off in the car And this didn't come from Mayor flames, I got real homies in NYC who was there and witnessed Moon turn around and bark on you "SON I'MA BUY YOU ONE SO YOU CAN LEAVE ME ALONE!" fam I know the entire story... But its a rumor tho... just like you try to give the allusion that you didn't fb message/dm boys asking how to get ({}) but you don't go as far denying it, you don't say it didn't happen because you know it did... And you know that I know that it did.I'ma Lame... I'm *+#*$ Made... but you go on twitter and send sublimes when we follow each other. I'm *+#*$ Made but I respond and @ you because I'm talking directly to you, I'm not dancing around anything... You got people hittin me up tellin me you hit them up telling them to tell me to calm down and that you're sublime was about me. But I'm *+#*$ madeTellin boy's you wish I was there so you could touch me... Fam in 4 years of college at SU you didn't touch a female what I look like being worried about you touching me? I went to school 3hrs away and had *#+%#$ from your University sucking me off my man, but you're right in the thick of it and didn't manage to get more than a hug, yet I'm supposed to take your tough new found courage talk serious? But Then Again You're Not Saying This To Me... You're Telling People Who Know You're A LAMEON MY DAUGHTERS LIFE I tweeted my response to you and had dudes from your city hit my phone saying "Say the word Cake and I'ma Handle That" My home girl said she'd slap the @*%% outta you for getting outta character like this... So you might be the one who should calm the %!@% down young man.Like Seriously Cut It Out! And Isn't Me Trying To Swag On You I'm just showing you how you manage to make yourself look more and more LAME every time you pull this. I'm no tough guy but I'm not the one for you to try to score points on at all fam trust me

 

[je ne sais quoi]

Originally Posted by INS

http://niketalk.yuku.com/...house-vol-choices?page=1

/done

See, the one liners from NT are hilarious, but I feed off the absurdity from some NTers.
In that thread:

Originally Posted by Gordonson

I mean, ideally you'd make your girl take that D like an all-star, but watching her getting piped all night and eventually enjoying it would be traumatizing.

@ insinuating that girls like getting raped

 

[mackmittenzz]

aiyo ma let me clapp dem buttcheeks  

   dat mass

 

[canifly34]

Anyone remember the dude that said "up comma" in thread about funny names?

 

[manny1]

this had me

when i read this.

eltouha wrote:
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
i was being serious... i'd totally lick my balls if i could
  

 

[supermanblue79]

Originally Posted by CanIFly34

Anyone remember the dude that said "up comma" in thread about funny names?

Son had that year 2030 keyboard with the new "up comma" button.

 

[j2legend]

Originally Posted by CanIFly34

Anyone remember the dude that said "up comma" in thread about funny names?

I remember this 

 

[guillermo gutierez]

there have been many times that i have laughed so hard that i seriously with no exaggeration thought i was gonna pass out or die.

cant breathe dizzy head hurtin fallin out of chair chest aching stomach sore cant see nothin cuz im laughin so hard