Confessions

I've been thinking about just talking to her a lot lately. Texted her a while back after not talking for several months, she was happy to hear from me and said she was gonna do the same the night before. I'm conflicted, main part of me just wants to keep it moving but I can't shake that urge to catch up.
 
I'm done with relationships !!!!
**** women

I'll just sleep with high class hookers

They can be tough. When I have no interest in them, my general level of happiness is a consistent 7-8, and that's great. But when I find that one I want to build with she takes me all the way to a 10, but there are the moments it'll drop to a 1 and you don't know what the problem is and how to fix it. That roller coaster takes too much of a toll on me man, if I find the consistency I'll stick with it.
 
I'm done with relationships !!!!
**** women

I'll just sleep with high class hookers

They can be tough. When I have no interest in them, my general level of happiness is a consistent 7-8, and that's great. But when I find that one I want to build with she takes me all the way to a 10, but there are the moments it'll drop to a 1 and you don't know what the problem is and how to fix it. That roller coaster takes too much of a toll on me man, if I find the consistency I'll stick with it.
pretty good summary. the only time I'm unhappy when there's no interest is every once in a while when I have nothing to do and no one's around to hang out. that drops me to a 4 or so.
 
I've been feeling some type of way for quite some time.

And I'm pretty sure I have a stress fracture in my foot and I'm not too happy about it. Not being able to go to the gym for a bit is gonna drive me crazy.
 
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Nah. Because if I plan on being friends with no emotional attachment, then going to lunch isn't a big deal IMO. Which, it wasn't. I went, we ate and conversed and I went to work. All done. Easy.

Through lunch I realized that I wouldn't even wanna be with her like that.. She was lightweight complaining about her relationship about things that happen in every relationship talmbout "I'm almost done with him." I don't wanna be with that. The lunch was good and helped me realize I don't want her.

Also free food. :wink:

Free food is the ish, ain't eeeem gon' lie.


There's this unattractive girlie at work that eyes me all the time. She's boo'd up now and for some reason it bothers me :smh:

you just liked the attention, an ego boost.
now you mad because ugmo stopped fawning over you. you'll be fine.
 
I rarely run into someone I'm attracted to on a deeper level, its probably been about 5-6 years. For the last month or so there's been someone I can't get off my mind. But I'm not ready, and yet I can't stay away.
 
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I dropped the ball on myfirst semester of college wasn't prepared I don't even know if you can be

Shot loads of work and no time to do out and me being lazy I gota find a way to balance this stuff out
 
I rarely run into someone I'm attracted to on a deeper level, its probably been about 5-6 years. For the last month or so there's been someone I can't get off my mind. But I'm not ready, and yet I can't stay away.

Word. I'm the same way. I'm perfectly happy being single and having a girl once in a blue moon. For some reason I like this girl a lot though. Ain't against it just taking it slow.
 
- I dropped college because I was VERY uncomfortable with being around so many people |I (and because I couldnt drive myself to do the work)
- I got fired from my first job for stealing :smh: (Worst part is my mama got me that job. So I probably drug her name through mud)
- Sometimes when people try to talk to me (like greet themselves, start small talk) I'll purposely blow them off. IDK why I do this. I don't think I'm better than anyone or anything like that. Maybe I'm antisocial??????
-Not close with too many of my family members. Only bout like 5 or 6. Probably because I haven't seen them in so long...


My dad indirectly is teaching me how to NOT treat/talk to my future kids.

.

:\ I feel. I feel.
 
Ever since mid/late 2011, I'd been trying to get over this ex of mine...glad to say that I've recently made it over that hurdle, at long last :pimp:. Sidenote: that 'Don't listen to Drake post-breakup or else you'll end up at your ex's house' theory is SO true...I did it while trying to get this particular ex back && of course it blew up in my face :lol: :lol:...

I thought that would be the toughest situation with a female I'd have to deal with, because I was so naive back then && just knew she was incapable of crushing me. I vividly remember going from straightedge livin' to drinking myself to sleep at night for 2 weeks straight...shh was so embarrassing. But I'm too nice a person...cause part of me would still rather take the pain of being left by someone && ex****ting my avenues of tryna make something work (&& failing) than doing the leaving && wondering 'what if', even if I know that's what I have to do...

Which leads me to the here && now. Chick I'd been talking to been mad inconsistent over the past month or so, not calling when she said she would, etc. (she claims it's cause of work...riiiiiight)...&& Monday I finally decided to walk. Of course she didn't take the news well, saying I didn't care, crying, etc, begging me to give her a fair chance...convo felt too real. I legit had/have battles in my mind over whether I was giving her a fair opp, && that's before she even said that (being a Gemini sucks sometimes), so I convinced myself to try once more. Idk, this whole thing with her just challenges EVERYTHING I've learned about females in the past few years since I had to put myself up on game a few years ago. Thursday she texts me saying she can't really talk cause her best friend's grandmother passed, but she's call tomorrow (Friday). I don't get mad, say it's cool...today comes && goes, no call...not tripping, cause this is the final straw.

I just care for folks too much...it kills me having to be the 'bad' guy in any circumstance. I don't ever want to be the one to damage/break anyone in the manner I was, don't ever want anyone's tears on my conscience...don't ever wanna put out bad karma. I feel that permanently cutting her off without her even knowing will cause all these things to happen...but, I've no other choice. I have to do this...for the both of us.

Now that that's out the system...Manning up like Eli.
 
Ever since mid/late 2011, I'd been trying to get over this ex of mine...glad to say that I've recently made it over that hurdle, at long last :pimp:. Sidenote: that 'Don't listen to Drake post-breakup or else you'll end up at your ex's house' theory is SO true...I did it while trying to get this particular ex back && of course it blew up in my face :lol: :lol:...

I thought that would be the toughest situation with a female I'd have to deal with, because I was so naive back then && just knew she was incapable of crushing me. I vividly remember going from straightedge livin' to drinking myself to sleep at night for 2 weeks straight...shh was so embarrassing. But I'm too nice a person...cause part of me would still rather take the pain of being left by someone && ex****ting my avenues of tryna make something work (&& failing) than doing the leaving && wondering 'what if', even if I know that's what I have to do...

Which leads me to the here && now. Chick I'd been talking to been mad inconsistent over the past month or so, not calling when she said she would, etc. (she claims it's cause of work...riiiiiight)...&& Monday I finally decided to walk. Of course she didn't take the news well, saying I didn't care, crying, etc, begging me to give her a fair chance...convo felt too real. I legit had/have battles in my mind over whether I was giving her a fair opp, && that's before she even said that (being a Gemini sucks sometimes), so I convinced myself to try once more. Idk, this whole thing with her just challenges EVERYTHING I've learned about females in the past few years since I had to put myself up on game a few years ago. Thursday she texts me saying she can't really talk cause her best friend's grandmother passed, but she's call tomorrow (Friday). I don't get mad, say it's cool...today comes && goes, no call...not tripping, cause this is the final straw.

I just care for folks too much...it kills me having to be the 'bad' guy in any circumstance. I don't ever want to be the one to damage/break anyone in the manner I was, don't ever want anyone's tears on my conscience...don't ever wanna put out bad karma. I feel that permanently cutting her off without her even knowing will cause all these things to happen...but, I've no other choice. I have to do this...for the both of us.

Now that that's out the system...Manning up like Eli.

How the hell are you the bad guy when ole girl is the one screwing up? Sounds to me like there's someone else and she's stringing you along just in case it doesn't work out with the other dude. That's not on you, its on her. She's a day late and a dollar short, kick her to the curb.
 
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Yea you're right, it certainly ain't my fault. I'm gone for good this time, I've just always been that type to think what I could've done different or how much more I could've done.

Kinda like eating, those times when you decide to stop before you get full, even tho you know you could easily crush the rest of your meal...figuratively, I ALWAYS try to clear the plate (literally too, most times :lol:), instead of just leaving the table, so to speak. But to realize that && finally be able to properly act on that realization...it feels good, man. :pimp:
 
:lol:
Ever since mid/late 2011, I'd been trying to get over this ex of mine...glad to say that I've recently made it over that hurdle, at long last :pimp:. Sidenote: that 'Don't listen to Drake post-breakup or else you'll end up at your ex's house' theory is SO true...I did it while trying to get this particular ex back && of course it blew up in my face :lol: :lol:...

I thought that would be the toughest situation with a female I'd have to deal with, because I was so naive back then && just knew she was incapable of crushing me. I vividly remember going from straightedge livin' to drinking myself to sleep at night for 2 weeks straight...shh was so embarrassing. But I'm too nice a person...cause part of me would still rather take the pain of being left by someone && ex****ting my avenues of tryna make something work (&& failing) than doing the leaving && wondering 'what if', even if I know that's what I have to do...

Which leads me to the here && now. Chick I'd been talking to been mad inconsistent over the past month or so, not calling when she said she would, etc. (she claims it's cause of work...riiiiiight)...&& Monday I finally decided to walk. Of course she didn't take the news well, saying I didn't care, crying, etc, begging me to give her a fair chance...convo felt too real. I legit had/have battles in my mind over whether I was giving her a fair opp, && that's before she even said that (being a Gemini sucks sometimes), so I convinced myself to try once more. Idk, this whole thing with her just challenges EVERYTHING I've learned about females in the past few years since I had to put myself up on game a few years ago. Thursday she texts me saying she can't really talk cause her best friend's grandmother passed, but she's call tomorrow (Friday). I don't get mad, say it's cool...today comes && goes, no call...not tripping, cause this is the final straw.

I just care for folks too much...it kills me having to be the 'bad' guy in any circumstance. I don't ever want to be the one to damage/break anyone in the manner I was, don't ever want anyone's tears on my conscience...don't ever wanna put out bad karma. I feel that permanently cutting her off without her even knowing will cause all these things to happen...but, I've no other choice. I have to do this...for the both of us.

Now that that's out the system...Manning up like Eli.

Be strong bruh.

Being nice does not equal being weak. You seem to be straddling the line by entertaining some of her non-sense. She's clearly playing games. Let her cry and complain and blame you but if she really cared, she wouldn't be playing you before that. I try to believe in people too and be nice but for that to work, you need to draw the lines and cut people off with little remorse.
 
Everyone in this thread, stay up, as you can see we all have issues we are dealing with and some are alike.  
 
I used to preach "everyone is beautiful" but I just cant anymore. I'm simply not attracted and unfortunately she's gonna think she's ugly when really its just different cup of tea for everyone
 
confession - boyfriend doesn't like smashing me on my cycle anymore. not going to lie, i'm ******* pissed.
 
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