What would you do? Vol. You can't come back to my house!!

[beh235]

Ok, I had some people over to my crib a little while ago. I made some food for everyone and told everyone to bring a bottle as their contribution. Everyone made it on time, except for one. By the time he came, the food was gone, but I had more in the fridge to make (wings and fries). He said he was hungry, so I go back in the kitchen and make some extra food just for him. We all had a good time, and at the end of the night, when everyone is ready to go, this fool decides to take the bottle back home with him that he brought. Granted, it was real cheap, but that's not the point. It's the principle. Would I be wrong in not inviting him back to the crib again. I honestly don't plan on even telling him we are all gonna hang. NT, what would y'all do? Side note: we all been cool and have been chilling for about 6-7 years at this point. It's the basic same group, about 6 of us or so.

 

[mojodmonky1]

As someone who regularly hosts friends over for UFC PPVs, Superbowl, World Cup, etc... etc... here is my 2 cents.

Cheap friends are gonna be cheap friends. Aint nothing you do or say is gonna change that kid. I got a couple friends like that, and it took me awhile but I have somewhat come to terms with it. You have to assume that if you are inviting that person over, you will be getting the short end of the stick. If you cant come to accept that, then dont invite that person over. It will just lead to you being annoyed and potentially the end of that friendship. For me, there is maybe only 1 friend who I just stopped callin out most of the time cause I got sick of it. It kinda sucks, cause he is/was one of my closest friends, but it just got to a breaking point for me.

I host fairly frequently, atleast 6-10 times a year. Its kind of a crappy situation for me cause most of my boys are still kinda bums who live at home with their parents, and/or live in "non-hosting" living situations (renting a room in a house with other strangers, or living in a small apt or they are just broke). If I dont host, that means we just dont get together. Given the two options (hosting/paying or not getting together) I will choose the former. When I host, me and the wife usually do it big, mostly because I like to cook and eat well. It easily costs me anywhere from $150-500, if not more, each time I have people over. My wife has a spending problem when it comes to hosting (her greatest fear is the embarrassment of running out of food) so she goes overboard every time. I try to put on a good "show" and make sure my guests have a good time and get enough to eat. All I'm asking is for a little help to the costs, and/or help in refilling my liquor cabinet.

 

[41239]

thats standard procedure to not invite him back

 

[captnaj phd]

You got it right, homie...just don't invite him back. When you buy a bottle for a party, you have purchased the MSRP worth of communal good times, not potential take-home alcohol. If dude's bottle of Nikolai is worth more than respecting your hospitallity, let him have his value.

 

[do work son]

i would've called him out first, then proceeded to tell him he's no longer welcome.

 

[mmg]

I agree with what mojo said.

Also it depends on the circumstance, in the type of person that I ask straight up or would just want to know the circumstance.

If we're meeting up at someone's crib to watch football on a Sunday, I'm not bringing bottles and I don't expect a spread, we all chip in some bread and order food.

Now if its a get together with multiple people, etc ill bring a bottle because too me if that person is opening their doors to me with liquor, food and entertainment it's the least I can do. And no cheap **** either someone once brought a bottle of ever clear :x we proceeded to escort him out.

 

[acemaster193]

There's always almost a fight in my boy's crib due to this same reason, after a house party.

 

[|A-Man|]

If you feel slighted don't invite him.

 

[atlien seeko]

Are you seriously considering compromising a 6-7 year friendship for somethng as simple as dude wanting to drink the rest of his liquor that HE bought?

 

[jordanscrub]

Am I the only one who doesn't think this is a big deal.. at all?

If it's a cheap bottle... then it's whatever

 

[niquefreak94]

Are you seriously considering compromising a 6-7 year friendship for somethng as simple as dude wanting to drink the rest of his liquor that HE bought?

yup

Am I the only one who doesn't think this is a big deal.. at all?
If it's a cheap bottle... then it's whatever

yup

yeeeeeaaaahhhh all that

 

[lou baton]

It's not that it's a big deal it's the principal. Prior to moving into a smaller place I too used to host a lot of parties for sporting events or just bbqs in general. There is almost always going to be that one person who is cheap and/or inconsiderate. I agree 100% with mojo. Sometimes you just have to suck it up unless ending the friendship isn't that big of a deal to you. Personally, I think it's only right to always bring your own bottle or 12 pack to a get together whether it's a good friend or just an acquaintance - and leave the remainder there. Especially, if a person is gracious enough to feed you and welcome you into their home. Unfortunately, not everyone feels this way.

 

[jking0821]

I agree with what mojo said.

Also it depends on the circumstance, in the type of person that I ask straight up or would just want to know the circumstance.

If we're meeting up at someone's crib to watch football on a Sunday, I'm not bringing bottles and I don't expect a spread, we all chip in some bread and order food.

Now if its a get together with multiple people, etc ill bring a bottle because too me if that person is opening their doors to me with liquor, food and entertainment it's the least I can do. And no cheap **** either someone once brought a bottle of ever clear :x we proceeded to escort him out.

I agree its all circumstantial. If you are having a party and providing food for people and its a known get together and you tell everyone bring drinks i will provide food. Then yes he should leave the bottle.

But as long as the majority of people bring alcohol i think im cool with it. At least homie brought something for himself. I have tons of friends that "stop-by" my place to watch a game or something empty handed, and i pour them a drink/grab them a beer they get drunk and just leave. Its ok time to time but when it becomes habitual i just stop inviting them or say things like "well i don't have any alcohol mind stopping and grabbing some" they usually do.

But overall this doesn't sound like a big deal. I understand not everyone has money for stuff and if i do i have no problem hooking you up from time to time. But don't make it an every time type thing

Spoiler: Secondary Question: Spoiler!

What if you are invited over for a bond fire/sporting event that is free? You bring your bottle drink some then do you leave it there still? I always do but some times it bugs me. I came over your place sat on your couch drank 4 beers of my 12 Sam octoberfest and you basically profit

 

[beh235]

Are you seriously considering compromising a 6-7 year friendship for somethng as simple as dude wanting to drink the rest of his liquor that HE bought?

Am I the only one who doesn't think this is a big deal.. at all?

If it's a cheap bottle... then it's whatever

Aight, first of all, let me clarify. ATL, we all met while working at the same place. Yes, we all are cool, but it's not like it's a "I'll give you the shirt off my back" type of friendship. And it's not like I'm saying we won't ever hang out, I'm just saying it's the principle of the matter. The way I was raised when you come to someone's house, especially if you're invited, you bring something. It doesn't have to be a lot, just a kind gesture. Imo, I think your line of thinking is cheap. How are you going to bring something then take it back. People might as well bring their own food then, if that's how you see it.

Jordanscrub, it's the matter of principle is all. It's not a "fight me" situation. I guess that situation just made me see things clearer is all. Idk, it's boils down to simple manners I guess.

 

[slamcity]

If he ever hosts a party, just do exactly the same thing he did to you; show up late, bring cheap liquor, eat his grub, then leave with your alcohol.
Not so much to "get him back", but more so just to see how he reacts. If he thinks nothing of it, then it should tell you that that is just his mindset when it comes to parties/gatherings in general. So when you host, maybe you wont feel so taken advantage of after understanding this dimension of his personality (if you choose to invite him).

 

[tonelow]

As someone who regularly hosts friends over for UFC PPVs, Superbowl, World Cup, etc... etc... here is my 2 cents.

Cheap friends are gonna be cheap friends. Aint nothing you do or say is gonna change that kid. I got a couple friends like that, and it took me awhile but I have somewhat come to terms with it. You have to assume that if you are inviting that person over, you will be getting the short end of the stick. If you cant come to accept that, then dont invite that person over. It will just lead to you being annoyed and potentially the end of that friendship. For me, there is maybe only 1 friend who I just stopped callin out most of the time cause I got sick of it. It kinda sucks, cause he is/was one of my closest friends, but it just got to a breaking point for me.

I host fairly frequently, atleast 6-10 times a year. Its kind of a crappy situation for me cause most of my boys are still kinda bums who live at home with their parents, and/or live in "non-hosting" living situations (renting a room in a house with other strangers, or living in a small apt or they are just broke). If I dont host, that means we just dont get together. Given the two options (hosting/paying or not getting together) I will choose the former. When I host, me and the wife usually do it big, mostly because I like to cook and eat well. It easily costs me anywhere from $150-500, if not more, each time I have people over. My wife has a spending problem when it comes to hosting (her greatest fear is the embarrassment of running out of food) so she goes overboard every time. I try to put on a good "show" and make sure my guests have a good time and get enough to eat. All I'm asking is for a little help to the costs, and/or help in refilling my liquor cabinet.

Didnt even have to read after that, its as simple as that.

I usually tell em if they bring a bottle its staying, Ill call em out too especially if its one of my close friends. But they're gonna find a way too be cheap, just gotta take the good with the bad sometimes.

 

[beh235]

JKing, to answer your spoiler, yes, you do leave it. You were invited and although it was free it's a kind gesture. It says you appreciate the invite and however small it was leaving the alcohol you could be invited back especially if you don't know the person. I do agree it is circumstantial, and no it's not a big deal y'all. It's just the matter of principle is all. It's the adult thing to do. I think it's tacky to bring something then take it back. I mean hell, everybody ate good AND you gonna take your liquor back? . Idk to each their own, I just don't see it that way.

 

[beh235]

If he ever hosts a party, just do exactly the same thing he did to you; show up late, bring cheap liquor, eat his grub, then leave with your alcohol.
Not so much to "get him back", but more so just to see how he reacts. If he thinks nothing of it, then it should tell you that that is just his mindset when it comes to parties/gatherings in general. So when you host, maybe you wont feel so taken advantage of after understanding this dimension of his personality (if you choose to invite him).

Nah, I'd rather just not go. That seems kind of petty to go tit for tat like that. I don't think he'll invite me or anyone over, he still lives with his moms.

 

[oidreez]

Not that big of a deal. Call him out on it though

 

[tonelow]

JKing, to answer your spoiler, yes, you do leave it. You were invited and although it was free it's a kind gesture. It says you appreciate the invite and however small it was leaving the alcohol you could be invited back especially if you don't know the person. I do agree it is circumstantial, and no it's not a big deal y'all. It's just the matter of principle is all. It's the adult thing to do. I think it's tacky to bring something then take it back. I mean hell, everybody ate good AND you gonna take your liquor back?

. Idk to each their own, I just don't see it that way.

Nah man, not everyone was raised this way. Im the only one out of my WHOLE group that even brings a bottle in the 1st place. The rest would just try to mooch off everyone else. You have to call em out, eventually they'll get it...but even if they it's not worth losing a (close) friend over.

 

[6 Rings G.O.A.T.]

You should've told him something while he was at your house..

 

[mojodmonky1]

If he ever hosts a party, just do exactly the same thing he did to you; show up late, bring cheap liquor, eat his grub, then leave with your alcohol.
Not so much to "get him back", but more so just to see how he reacts. If he thinks nothing of it, then it should tell you that that is just his mindset when it comes to parties/gatherings in general. So when you host, maybe you wont feel so taken advantage of after understanding this dimension of his personality (if you choose to invite him).

Nah, I'd rather just not go. That seems kind of petty to go tit for tat like that. I don't think he'll invite me or anyone over, he still lives with his moms.

hahahahaha thats the thing. the cheap guy NEVER hosts. Either cause he still lives with moms, or because he's too cheap too. Same situation with my cheap friend. There was one time I remember when cheap friend hosted. I straight up told him that I'm not bringing anything cause he shows up empty handed to my house EVERYTIME. I show up and what do I find? NOTHING. no food, maybe 5 loose beers (for bout 8-10 people) and thats it. All my other deadbeat friends rolled empty handed that day too, so cheap host had the audacity to say "someone go out and get some beer". WORST. GET TOGETHER. EVER.

I took an extra L later when my wife was givin me the business bout being classless and showing up empty handed. She was annoyed that I would stoop to that petty level and try to go tit for tat. "Just cause your boy is a classless bum doesnt give you the right to do the same thing." Man, it was like gettin chewed out by moms when I was a kid. shame.

 

[beh235]

If he ever hosts a party, just do exactly the same thing he did to you; show up late, bring cheap liquor, eat his grub, then leave with your alcohol.
Not so much to "get him back", but more so just to see how he reacts. If he thinks nothing of it, then it should tell you that that is just his mindset when it comes to parties/gatherings in general. So when you host, maybe you wont feel so taken advantage of after understanding this dimension of his personality (if you choose to invite him).

Nah, I'd rather just not go. That seems kind of petty to go tit for tat like that. I don't think he'll invite me or anyone over, he still lives with his moms.

hahahahaha thats the thing. the cheap guy NEVER hosts. Either cause he still lives with moms, or because he's too cheap too. Same situation with my cheap friend. There was one time I remember when cheap friend hosted. I straight up told him that I'm not bringing anything cause he shows up empty handed to my house EVERYTIME. I show up and what do I find? NOTHING. no food, maybe 5 loose beers (for bout 8-10 people) and thats it. All my other deadbeat friends rolled empty handed that day too, so cheap host had the audacity to say "someone go out and get some beer". WORST. GET TOGETHER. EVER.

I took an extra L later when my wife was givin me the business bout being classless and showing up empty handed. She was annoyed that I would stoop to that petty level and try to go tit for tat. "Just cause your boy is a classless bum doesnt give you the right to do the same thing." Man, it was like gettin chewed out by moms when I was a kid. shame.

Daaaamn. Nothing? That sucks. I think I would have just stayed home . But yeah cheap friends are gonna be cheap. In that case, I wouldn't have expected anything from said friend.

 

[beh235]

JKing, to answer your spoiler, yes, you do leave it. You were invited and although it was free it's a kind gesture. It says you appreciate the invite and however small it was leaving the alcohol you could be invited back especially if you don't know the person. I do agree it is circumstantial, and no it's not a big deal y'all. It's just the matter of principle is all. It's the adult thing to do. I think it's tacky to bring something then take it back. I mean hell, everybody ate good AND you gonna take your liquor back? . Idk to each their own, I just don't see it that way.

Nah man, not everyone was raised this way. Im the only one out of my WHOLE group that even brings a bottle in the 1st place. The rest would just try to mooch off everyone else. You have to call em out, eventually they'll get it...but even if they it's not worth losing a (close) friend over.

That's a bad spot to be in though, to tbe the only one. Then they look at you sideways like you're wrong. I think this situation might be just an age thing. Generally younger people don't see it as an issue. I know I didn't when I was younger, but that's besides the point. You should do it regardless of age. I guess when you get older and have your own place, you see it differently. Idk.

 

[rex ryan]

depends on the situation imo.

if its a get togehter and the host tells everyone ahead of time to byob then if im bringing my own stuff becuase if i don't then im not drinking then im taking whatever i don't finish home with me.

if food or drink is provided then i'll defenitely pitch in on something or bring something and leave whatevers left over there.