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Great exercise I did a few years back to help me with my social anxiety.....
Let's face it, we are all superficial to some degree. Probably moreso as NTers on a shoe forum. So when we think of social success, we think of striking up conversations with very attractive women, having sex with 8s, 9s, or 10s. Making out with a white girl. Etc etc.........
So naturally, if we are not socializing with attractive women, we think we failed. So what happens is we go out, and ignore everyone, and instead, focus on obsess over women only, and then, when we see an attractive women, and put her on this pedastal, with an incredible amount of pressure, and just come out as awkward, back out of it, or just give up. We go home feeling terrible.
What changed for me is forgetting about my old idea of success, about the concept of socializing with attractive people only....and just started socializing with EVERYONE. Not just the opposite sex you find attractive. I'm talking men, women, old people, kids, everyone. When I did that, I opened up to a lot of people, just saying hello, or walking past someone and smiling at someone, and that person smiling back, even if its a dude , just that "whats up, im having a good day and I hope you are too" grin on your face and projecting it on everyone, I swear it makes everyone around you feel a little better about themselves, and it will make you feel a lot better about yourself too.
Start off with easy targets in every day scenarios:
1) The cashier at the Grocery
2) The Barista at Starbucks
3) The receptionist at the front desk of your office building
4) People walking to their classes in between your classes in college
Just say "Hi" and smile to one of the random people above, if they are not that busy, compliment them on something very light hearted (non sexual,) and most importantly, SMILE when you do it. It's important too, that you have the mindset of not expecting anything in return from them, (so you don't come off as creepy.) you did it because you wanted to.
Started doing that and soon you will see most of the time people reciprocate it positively. They will usually smile back, or appreciate your kind gesture, however small it is. Do all of this without any sexual expectations. If you are doing it to women, just do it with the intention of just being positive. Even if you don't look like Brad Pitt or Trey Songz, people, men, women, children, kids, and senior citizens, (NOT JUST FEMALES YOU WANT TO SLAY) will think you are charming.
NATURALLY,.....
the above positive attitude will just flow to all other facets of life......including the opposite sex You will no longer approach women with expectations and anxiety. You won't put them on a pedastal and therefore you won't burden yourself with the feeling of FAILURE if say, a women rejects your sexual advances.
Good advice. Would you say your overall level of anxiety has decreased?