NT'ers over 25, can I ask you a question?

[panaricanretro]

I get it all the time. Not just family, anybody. I'm married too so it's a constant pressure. My parents don't bug me anymore because we've already told them we're like 90% certain we're not having kids, but it's an awkward question. It's one of those things that's kind of bad etiquette but people don't realize it yet. Just kinda personal, like how much more info do you want?

"Are you guys gonna have kids?"
"Probably not, especially not now. Maybe later on but I don't know."
"How old is your wife? You don't want to wait too long."
"She's still got time, but I don't think we want kids."
"So you are you using condoms, pills, or just pulling out? What if you have an accidental kid? Why don't you want kids, was one of you beaten as a child? What kind of noises does your wife make during sex? What that thang smell like?"
"

"

 

[dakid23]

Don't want any....

 

[imthekang]

Originally Posted by INshoeKid

Every time I see my sister she asks us when we are going to have a kid. I'm 28 the wife is 29 and we said we start trying when we hit 30. We are focused on being financially stable before we add a kid to the picture. Want to make sure we can afford to send our kid to med/law school if that's what he or she decides she wants. We should have our rental properties and our vacation condo paid off by the end of this year and then just the mortgage on the house we live in will be our only debt. At that point I'll feel comfortable with kid.

   VERY VERY SIMILAR PLANS.....

 

[dacityslanga]

I hear it all the time....

I tell them Im focused on my career right now....now that Im focused on and established at work..I do want some children.

I also get the question when are you going to get a steady girlfriend....

 

[stringer bell 32]

My parents have had 3 grandchildren since 2007 all courtesy of my sister so no I don't get any pressure

 

[dabottom305]

So I'm taking my mom to work today and she brings this topic up again. As usual I tell her, "I'm not ready and I don't want one. I barely like babysitting my nephew all the time." She hit me with the 'what if the condom broke, what would you do?'. I tell her it won't tell her it won't happen. She responds with the usual "I'm getting older and you're not gonna give me a granddaughter" speech then tells me she's gonna tell my girl to put a hole in the condom. 

 

[jhobson5]

I turn 26 tomorrow and lucky for me my dad doesnt want grandchildren right now, granted he is 57 and acts like he is 21. I dont think I would let my child stay with him. But people around me always ask me when and my gf are getting married granted she is 28. Lucky for me she doesnt push the issue ever. I am just glad I am not like some of my friends who are 26 with kids that 8 and 9 years old.

 

[xhxxkxxdx]

Im 27 and am getting married beginning of next year. So my whole family is giving me that "time to have kids" . I want to do the marriage thing for a couple years then make the little ones. I have to many toys of my own im not ready to share

 

[sho3tym]

interesting topic.

I'm 27, married with 2 kids.

I love being a father and can genuinely say I love being married.

I'm a school teacher/basketball coach, life is good. I can see how some of you guys who don't have children would look at it they way you do...I enjoy reading the different perspectives. At the end of the day, I don't feel there is a "right" way, just gotta do what works for you.

However, nearly instantaneously(sp?) after my wife and I were married the baby question followed. My wife was real quick to nip that in the bud. Even after my son was born up until now, he's 2 1/2, we get "ready for the next one?". We're not at the moment, but it does get annoying...

 

[ham city]

Originally Posted by Tupac Jordan

It's the opposite for me. My mom is always in my ear telling me "go visit your kids." I'm like damn isn't visiting your kids 5 to 6 times a year not counting their bdays and Xmas enough?

How far apart you and your kids distance wise?

 

[ruxxx]

Originally Posted by xhxxkxxdx

I have to many toys of my own im not ready to share

 

[Pmighty]

DaBottom305 wrote:

---

"are you really gonna let me die and not give me a grandchild?" 

Whats your response?

"you never know what the future may hold." why pressure somebody who doesnt want to have a child into having a child. Two parent households are almost non-existent and there are alot more reasons not to have one than to have one imo. half the people who have one prob didnt want them either but have to act like they do because its "a gift" i dont see it in my future personally. I literally cant think of one positive thing about being a parent

what i hate more than anything is "when yall gettin married, you been together long enough you minus well" its that type of train of thought the leads to divorce rates being so high... no thanks
  

 

[mco85]

I hardly ever get asked. If anything people tell me not to have any anytime soon

 

[cuppiecakie]

All the damn time.
"When are you getting married?"
"When are you two going to start a family?"
"When are you going back to school?"


Ugh.

 

[asianplayer]

Anytime I see my family especially since they all live oversees so I don't see them that often.

 

[tr1ll]

Living in Houston where it seems like everyone over the age of 18 has kids, my people pat me on the back.

 

[sloanboy]

I think my issue is gonna end up being is finding a women that doesnt have kids when i am ready

 

[retro23j]

Originally Posted by SomethingDunk

Im 26 and all they ask is when im getting married

 

[curbyourenthusiasm]

when my moms says it i just laugh like "yeah okay"


when kids at school say it i say "i can barely take care of myself"

nobody else says it.

 

[illwill24]

Originally Posted by cuppiecakie

All the damn time.
"When are you getting married?"
"When are you two going to start a family?"
"When are you going back to school?"


Ugh.

 

[staystrong]

Originally Posted by cuppiecakie

All the damn time.
"When are you getting married?"
"When are you two going to start a family?"
"When are you going back to school?"


Ugh.

Every Damn day of ny life my parents tell me this and I tell them" hell no ""Hell no""!@#% NO"

 

[2lipslegit]

Originally Posted by Pmighty

DaBottom305 wrote:

---

"are you really gonna let me die and not give me a grandchild?" 

Whats your response?

"you never know what the future may hold." why pressure somebody who doesnt want to have a child into having a child. Two parent households are almost non-existent and there are alot more reasons not to have one than to have one imo. half the people who have one prob didnt want them either but have to act like they do because its "a gift" i dont see it in my future personally. I literally cant think of one positive thing about being a parent

what i hate more than anything is "when yall gettin married, you been together long enough you minus well" its that type of train of thought the leads to divorce rates being so high... no thanks
  

50% of pregnancies are unplanned bro.

 

[nyc game]

Used to, not so much now.
I know they say it in a playful way, but I can tell they sort of mean it.

 

[Fong$tarr]

My older brother is having kids and is filling that void that my parents wanted. My folks are cool though. I am from a divorced family and they understand if I don't have kids or don't even get married.

 

[beh235]

My mom mentions it from time to time, and it irritates me. Granted my situation is different from most, but still. I do want kids. At the moment, timing isn't right. But we'll see.