NT...Relationships...Mature Discussion...Courtship is so hard

[T0INE]

Originally Posted by CROSSISOM

There should be no timetable on sex, but for the possibility of an actual relationship sustaining... it's better to wait.

I agree.

 

[darkwing duck]

that totally makes sense. i had to chase my girl, if it was the other way around i dunno if it woud work

 

[eight2one]

Shane, pics of this girl?

 

[jdb1523]

To me, the hardest part about courtship is balancing the fine line between coming across 'too strong' (showing too much interest) & not showingenough. Ironically, I'm in that exact predicament right now.

 

[ghenges]

The best relationships start with friendships. I mean, when you are at that 'serious relationship age', it doesn't matter. If a girl likes you, shelikes you. Yea you can do/say things to win her over, but the older you get, the more she will be attracted to your accomplishments and who you are rather thanyour ability to smooth talk your way to her.

Some girls are so jaded that they think every dude with a friendly smile has some ulterior motive to get in their pants. Those girls were usually duped before,though.

 

[name i koop]

Originally Posted by eight2one

Shane, pics of this girl?

I won't add her to facebook because of the pictures I have on my acct....I knowbetter with this one....I will post her pic tho....

**pic removed**

like an angel....

 

[airtrainerkid]

Take your time like you said. When i met my main chicks( long serious relationship, just 2) we chilled all day but never made it about sex till 3 1/2 monthslater, if i would of got it too soon i would of thought she was a Gardening tool, but that`s just me. And if ya don`t know, its good to know that Kitty`s Timeline if you plan to wife her. Who,where,Gona-cepah-herp?

 

[mr jordan04]

Originally Posted by SoleAsian

If a girl is pursuing you, that means you can get it easily without any trouble.
If you are pursuing the girl, you might have to work a bit for it.
People want what they can't have.

 

[blackmagnus514]

I hate chasing women. Either they're with it or they're not. That's their imperative and choice. Just let me know so I dont waste my time.

 

[raptors29]

Originally Posted by Name I Koop

Originally Posted by frostythepoptart

3 months. does not compute.

I always say, one way to gain the upper hand is to withhold the D...make them want it so bad that they will wait for it....the benefits of this technique are endless

I like this

but it sounds like a fail waiting to happen. After all that time not having the D, she's either gonna find it elsewhere or be a D addict.

 

[kix4kix]

Originally Posted by blackmagnus514

I hate chasing women. Either they're with it or they're not. That's their imperative and choice. Just let me know so I dont waste my time.

QFMFT

cue the hands clapping gif. Listen tricky I aint sweatin nobody in this jawn called earth. Either you feeling my vapors, or you feeling the next man, no sweatof my skin.

 

[jdb1523]

I hate chasing women. Either they're with it or they're not. That's their imperative and choice. Just let me know so I dont waste my time.

You nailed it on the head Karsten. And what's just as worse as her friends that withhold information. I'm 24, I can tell if the damn girl is interestedor not, but let me know if I'm wasting my time with a gold digger, a *%%$%, or both. There will ALWAYS be flirty little games in the beginning of arelationship, but at least give me a heads up if it's worthwhile.

 

[j23s]

Mature discussion and NT? Good luck

 

[sighfur]

If its meant to be, it will be.

When you start planning too much, and become too methodical about situations, thats when things become fabricated.

I met my wife, and never looked back. I didn't try and play any kind of role, I just was myself, did me, and inturn she was her true self aswell.

Just go with the flow, things are simpler, more natrual and enjoyable this way. If you have a masterplan 9/10 times, it will fail.

 

[blackmagnus514]

word. I'd rather know if I'm getting %*! from her or not...but that's another debate.

like what's the point of courting someone if they just want the attention and not to know you for you?

 

[yungmatt]

Originally Posted by blackmagnus514

I hate chasing women. Either they're with it or they're not.

 

[DCAllAfrican]

Originally Posted by RL Treyce

Originally Posted by Name I Koop

Originally Posted by RL Treyce

Oh boy.... whats with the waiting game, that *!@* pisses me off man.... silly !++ games

I'm self-imposing this waiting game....the girl has it all. She thinks I'm a #@!%%, I'm trying to break her down slowly, so I have to show her that I can be a proper dude and not try to get the kitty...I have stellar kitty percentage....and the sign are there that I can get the kitty...but she's the type you bring home to mom and all...

While I understand what you're trying to accomplish... Do you still see how you have to play a game to get there?

Every relationship is a chess game. Man-woman. Boss-employee. It is ALL one big happy game.

Don't use the word "game" as if it is some immature take/approach.

"Game" is only wrong when deception is involved. Having strategy (which is my terminology for it all) isn't harmful at all.

Withholding "it" from her is a great idea. Women need to have this done to them more often. A woman should never feel that she can control you bywithholding the "P" from you. What a better way to prove this to her by acting disinterested in it.

 

[smedroc]

Originally Posted by da703trailblaza

Any of you have this problem where the chicks that are aggressive and pursue you are the ones you don't want anything to do with?

I'm not a shallow guy by any stretch of the imagination but ten times out of nine the ones who pursue me are crazy.

i think i'm having an epiphany...

 

[born tuesday]

Every serious relationship I had included the chick pursuing me. They all ended in a relationship FAIL.

 

[westcoastsfinest]

SoleAsian wrote:

---

If a girl is pursuing you, that means you can get it easily without any trouble.
If you are pursuing the girl, you might have to work a bit for it.
People want what they can't have.
this...its the truth

 

[DCAllAfrican]

Everyone
Everyone
Everyone

Can someone define what pursuing is?

If a man/woman is pursuing a woman/man, what are some things he/she will be doing?

I can honestly say I have never PURSUED a woman. Things have happened but.............I am just always confused with the terminology. Someone clear it up forme please

 

[black jesus]

Originally Posted by yungmatt

Originally Posted by blackmagnus514

I hate chasing women. Either they're with it or they're not.

 

[blackmagnus514]

"pursuing" and "chase" to me are interchangeable...it's liek you spending time, money and emotions on this person who aint giving youwhat you want in return....sorta like cat/mouse

 

[mrmoneyindabank]

I agree with the OP's chick(YNS by the way)

Men are naturally conditioned to pursue women. We're hunters. Whenever a women pursues me I can't help but think she's done this before and willprobably do it again. I don't know about that 3month nonsense. If your putting in work it should take 6 weeks tops.

 

[DCAllAfrican]

Originally Posted by blackmagnus514

"pursuing" and "chase" to me are interchangeable...it's liek you spending time, money and emotions on this person who aint giving you what you want in return....sorta like cat/mouse

Well count me out. I don't think ANYONE should chase after anyone else. If we are basing it off of THAT premise. If you are TRYING to give someone yourtime and they seem disinterested, then move on.

The whole, "Proving to someone that you really care" stuff is for the birds.