Mature NTers In Mature Relationships, What Do You Guys Think? (21+ Only)

[84jordan03]

o yea and to answer the question. i let her go but im not really a fan of my girl going to either without me.

im a little more comfortable about bars with her "smarter" friends bc clubs in nyc are filled with countless beasts

 

[west2east]

Originally Posted by NikeTalker23

you see the people she would go with get pissy drunk and are all single or the type to cheat on their dudes..

See to me that is the problem. Not the setting, but the company. I dunno if I could trust my significant other going out getting pissy drunk withfriends I don't trust. That's just no bueno.

 

[Los Angeles]

Originally Posted by NikeTalker23

For those of you in mature, serious relationship that are over 21, what are your views on your girlfriend going to bars? I can understand clubs because girl's like to dance but to me the whole bar environment is for singles. Your opinions?

So this is where you've been fam?

Nah, but my girl and I have been together for 2+ years - no bars nor clubs for both of us.

 

[blackmagnus514]

people are the company they keep.

 

[blackmagnus514]

shut up nasty boy.

 

[harlemtothebronx]

@Y'all using the word "let".

If she wants to go, she'll go. Would you say your girl "lets" you go places? I can go wherever the hell I want. Whether or not she has a problemwith it will be considered, but neither person should have to ask for permission.

 

[harlemtothebronx]

 

[blackmagnus514]

SMH

 

[fanatic15]

I have some friends who have cheated on their bf's before, and I have some friends who do some questionable things but that doesn't at all mean I amthat way. So I don't really agree with the "You are the company you keep" mentality. I know what is and isnt appropriate for me and myrelationship and that's what dictates what I do, not what my friends do.

As for bars and clubs, I really don't give a %$#$ quite honestly

. If a guy/girl wants to cheat they will no matter what the setting, surroundings orsituation.

 

[gambit215]

um no, f trust, bars are full of MEN buddy, woman or group of women going to bars only spells trouble, everyone wants to place the blame on alcohol ifsomething does pop off, btw, if ya shorty gotta go to a bar to get her drink on.....................theres a problem. I been with my boo for 4 years, when shewanna get tipsy you go to a liquor store, cop some sweet crap for her(Remy Red, Alize etc) and call it a DAY.

 

[jsindaa]

Originally Posted by Fanatic15

I have some friends who have cheated on their bf's before, and I have some friends who do some questionable things but that doesn't at all mean I am that way. So I don't really agree with the "You are the company you keep" mentality. I know what is and isnt appropriate for me and my relationship and that's what dictates what I don, not what my friends do.

As for bars and clubs, I really don't give a %+%* quite honestly

. If a guy/girl wants to cheat they will no matter what the setting, surroundings or situation.

Exactly how I feel about my girl. She has some friends that cheated and some questionable friends...but she's not them. As far as I'mconcerned arguin about it will just make the situation worse...better off trusting her, if she lies...her bad I keep it moving.

 

[sneekerluvr]

Originally Posted by DatZNasty

I'd be more concerned about clubs since "Dancing" nowadays is just dry humping, groping, and advertising what isn't or shouldn't be for sale. At a bar, she's with her friends who are going to cockblock the ###@ out of any dudes anyways. I'd be more comfortable with bars than clubs.

I feel the same way. In the end though it's really all about trust and if you trust her, which you very well should seeing as how she's yourgirlfriend, then you should really and truly have no problem with her going to either.

 

[krazyrodzilla]

My girl doesn't drink, so don't have that problem. I think it's all about trust though.

 

[mrbigbusiness]

Originally Posted by NikeTalker23

For those of you in mature, serious relationship that are over 21, what are your views on your girlfriend going to bars? I can understand clubs because girl's like to dance but to me the whole bar environment is for singles. Your opinions?

Not at all dude, don't be insecure. If she wants to go to a bar with her girls then so be it. I've been with my girl 5 years, I trust her with my life.As long as you can trust the girl you're with you shouldn't have a problem with it. But if she doesn't invite you then I don't know. Usuallywhen ever my girl goes to a bar she will invite me. Shes going into Manhattan tomorrow night, but I'm working. So its not that serious as long as you havetrust.

 

[socaking]

Would you say your girl "lets" you go places? I can go wherever the hell I want.
Exactly. As far as im concerned, any place is full with men looking for females. And going to the club with your mate would be kind of boringwoundlt it? Nothing is wrong with dancing with strangers then going home.

If she going to cheat she will do it anyway.

 

[eaalto]

I think the big issue is trust.

My wife doesn't care if I go to the bar, as long as she knows I'm going to the bar. She doesn't like the idea of being uninformed of myactivities.

We had a situation a while back:

I had a late meeting at work, which ended around 11:30 P.M. Instead of going straight home, I went out to the bar and had a couple beers with my co-workers. I came home, she was asleep, and she never would have known the difference but in the morning I sent out a text message and got a response, and she questionedme why I was receiving a text at 7:00 in the morning. I explained the whole situation, and she was pretty pissed off that I would go out and do something likethat rather than come home to sleep next to my wife.

I didn't think it was that big of a deal, but it was a big deal to her. I think I sent her flowers at work to apologize.

I'm going to be having another situation like this coming up this month, late meeting - and a desire to go to the bar after. The only thing I might dodifferent this time around is run it by her before I decide on my own that it's a good decision. If she ends up not being cool with it, I'll probablyjust go home. It's a lot easier than dealing with a pissed off wife for a week.

If I were to flip the coin, and it was her in question, going to the bar instead of coming home after work, against my knowledge, I would probably have a verysimilar reaction.


If I know she's going to the bar, I trust her not to do anything stupid.

Last time she went without me, it was a going away party for her boss. I called her when I got off work, but she didn't answer. I ended up just going tothe bar, and she was absolutely annihilated. It was good that I picked her up because she threw up in the car on the way home (better ours than someoneelse's).

 

[bigblackafronation18]

honestly, dont worry about it
if you truly have it, shes coming home to you anyways
cuz if shes going to do you wrong, she doesn't have to be in a club/bar to do it