Male and Female NTer's opinion needed

[spanishrock3r]

[h6]Ok so i want male and female opinion on this......if you were in a relationship/engagement/marriage and if your spouse had a problem with you drinking would you stop? if so why? if not then would you be willing to come to a middle ground such as only drinking with you two are together? If not why? EVERYONE'S opinion is welcomed.
[/h6]
*EDIT*

ok fellas to be more specific if you had a problem with your girl drinking?

 

[swag odie]

You gotta tell us how drunk you're getting, guy.

 

[ebozek9]

If I knew I was getting out of hand when drunk, then yes I'd stop. If she didn't like the fact that I'd have a few beers after work to relax but I keep to myself, I wouldn't stop. Depends on the situation

 

[el unico]

^^ yeah he's right about how drunk you get. I would stop and have stopped, then again I never drank heavily from the beginning. My soon to be fiance asked me to slow down because I was drinking every weekend after I turned 21. Haven't drank in over 2 months

 

[marvin hagler]

Why did you make your font smaller?

 

[cap1229]

Originally Posted by ebozek9

If I knew I was getting out of hand when drunk, then yes I'd stop. If she didn't like the fact that I'd have a few beers after work to relax but I keep to myself, I wouldn't stop. Depends on the situation

 

[spanishrock3r]

well in this case she was drinking on the weekends and there were times she would get so drunk that she wouldn't remember a thing the next morning. come to find out this weekend that the ppl she does chill and have the "occasional" drink with makes jungle juice with ever clear and who knows what else.

 

[DCAllAfrican]

You have to let her know how you feel about it man. Don't attack her though because she will naturally get defensive and won't stop or slow down.

Use the, "I am concerned about you when you state is altered" approach instead of coming off as controlling. Maybe that will work.

Now do you drink and how often?

 

[spanishrock3r]

i tried every approach possible and she doesn't seem to think that the was she drinks is wrong. and i did drink but i quit so that i wouldn't be hypocritical and hopefully she would stop or slow herself.

 

[mytmouse76]

For her own safety she shouldn't be drinking to the point she doesn't remember anything. Is there a reason she may be drinking so much? You need to sit her down and let her know you're not ok with and it's not safe/responsible to be drinking that much.

 

[calibeebee]

dead this chick. you guys are too young to be in a relationship. Maybe you'll meet again after college and you can be together, but as of now she's gonna get drunk and bang lots of dudes. deal with it, or walk away, but you aren't gonna stop it from happening.

 

[nicelikechrist]

I would not mess a drunkard. Personally, even though I don't drink and never have, I don't really have a problem with my partner drinking as long as she isn't get wasted every night. Drinking in moderation is fine with me.

If the girl is getting drunk every night or drinking to a point where it is affecting the relationship in a bad way then I'd dead her. Too little time to deal with that kind of nonsense.

 

[lou baton]

My marriage ultimately ended over alcohol so it is just my opinion that if a significant other feels the other persons drinking is truly affecting the relationship it should be address. Some people do overreact but if the drinking is out of hand, whether it be too often or just too much consumption when it does take place, it can be detrimental. Beside that, there can always be underlying factors as to why that person drinks the way they do and that shouldn't be ignored either. That being said, in the end no one should waste their life trying to fix someone who doesn't want fixing. Just my opinion tho.

 

[missdivadoll]

Coming from a family of alcoholics and drug additcs, I can tell you that if the person doesn't believe that they have a problem, then nothing you say is going to make a difference. If she doesn't think it's a big deal and has no intention of slowing down then you have to make a decision. Can you just deal with it and let her do whatever or do you need to just walk away?


If it were me, and I felt it was an issue I would pretty much say "Hey, I care about you and love you very much, but I can't sit up worrying myself sick about what's going to happen to you every time you drink like this. You're an adult, and you can do what you want, but if you're not gonna slow down then I need to walk away from this."

 

[cap1229]

Originally Posted by MissDivaDoll




If it were me, and I felt it was an issue I would pretty much say "Hey, I care about you and love you very much, but I can't sit up worrying myself sick about what's going to happen to you every time you drink like this. You're an adult, and you can do what you want, but if you're not gonna slow down then I need to walk away from this."

this.

 

[santhony21]

i dont get crazy or blackout drunk so if she wanted me to cut back a bit or just drink with her around id be cool with that, but she couldnt tell me to stop altogether

 

[bean pie slanga]

Do as she says. You got yourself into a relationship with her, you have to appease her. It comes with the territory.

Don't like it? Get out now.