Is It "Not Love" To Compare The Value Of Gifts Given and Received?

[DCAllAfrican]

Had a discussion with a girl on Twitters

Basically she says: It isn't love if you are comparing the value of gifts given/received.

I say: There is no way NOT TO compare the value of gifts given/received. If I give you a $3000 Coach Purse (or whatever yall like) and you give me a shirt and tie, I am "wrong" for saying oBetter ? Please.

Of course she hits me with a bunch of Disney mumbo jumbo, but I feel it is impossible to not compare.

 

[|A-Man|]

Gifts have nothing to do with love.

Especially if you're trying to equate it to the amount of money spent.

What you're talking about is getting equal value for the gifts you give compared to the gifts you receive. No way to guarantee that unless you let ppl know what you're getting them beforehand.

 

[limonyfresh]

Are you sure you're talking about love? Do you care more about the gift or the person giving said gift?

 

[so nyuh shi dae]

if you really like/love someone, you're not giving them gifts and expecting gifts in return.

 

[DCAllAfrican]

Are you sure you're talking about love? Do you care more about the gift or the person giving said gift?

You are reading too much into it.

Simply put,

If I am in a relationship with a girl and the gift I give her is WAY more expensive than what she gives me, and I "notice" it, I was told that I don't REALLY love her.

I just think that is a crock of bull......

 

[limonyfresh]

...and the next time you want to get her a gift do you give her a WAY more expensive gift or a Way cheaper gift?

 

[DCAllAfrican]

...and the next time you want to get her a gift do you give her a WAY more expensive gift or a Way cheaper gift?

But lettuce say I do go to that length, how and why does that translate into me not REALLY loving her?

 

[Sonny Corinthos]

It would be fair to be expect something good if the chick straight up asked for a $3000 gift .

 

[limonyfresh]

But lettuce say I do go to that length, how and why does that translate into me not REALLY loving her?

IMO, if you have to think twice about doing something or changing something for someone you "love" after a material exchange, you're in it for other reasons...or you're petty...or you don't have the pockets deep enough to be slanging $3000 gifts...

 

[bossjin]

It depends, you should know how much money your girl or whoever your dating makes. If you know shes super ballin and holding out thats one thing, but say she works at walmart or something you shouldnt expect a 3k gift. If you really love someone what they give you probly wont matter, hasn't to me.

 

[so nyuh shi dae]

Are you sure you're talking about love? Do you care more about the gift or the person giving said gift?

You are reading too much into it.

Simply put,

If I am in a relationship with a girl and the gift I give her is WAY more expensive than what she gives me, and I "notice" it, I was told that I don't REALLY love her.

I just think that is a crock of bull......

i guess a good question to ask is, why do you think she spent significantly less on you? why does that bother you?

 

[miniojw]

I'm in a fairly new relationship and we agreed on a cap of $100. Just to keep things simple.

 

[miketysonthekiller]

IN MERRICUH! Materialistic things= love

the higher the value, the more love you got etc... load of nonsense, but if you want to be matched put a cap on the gift or something. People will always try to make you feel bad if they feel you should do better when giving gifts. People are full of **** with their high sense of entitlement. Then they come up with excuses and blah blah blah. Not my cup of tea to be frank

 

[ksteezy]

It depends on each others financial situation, if I can afford something fancy like a nice purse and instead get her shirt from the clearance rack at the Gap, I will get the stone face, same way I can't really expect a pair of Balenciagas when I know that's 80% of a two weeks pay for her...you get what you can afford, try and be thoughtful in the process....it's obvious when you don out thought into a gift for someone special and that will kind of mess it all up no matter what the cost is.

 

[solefood229]

It depends on each others financial situation, if I can afford something fancy like a nice purse and instead get her shirt from the clearance rack at the Gap, I will get the stone face, same way I can't really expect a pair of Balenciagas when I know that's 80% of a two weeks pay for her...you get what you can afford, try and be thoughtful in the process....it's obvious when you don out thought into a gift for someone special and that will kind of mess it all up no matter what the cost is.

this what im talking about this that grown man ****

 

[jesusshuttlesworth34]

You know what Craig in Friday After Next said......


But seriously....I don't give gifts or make purchases expecting something in return. I don't even like receiving gifts, never have. I buy myself all the things I want/need. If someone takes the time to think of what to give me or puts the effort into making me something....it's appreciated.

Material things or expensive items don't impress me.

 

[RustyShackleford]

Steezy is right, it depends on her financial situation. I would never, never want my chick blasting most of her money on a gift for me.

But if she is doing well in the money department it really comes down to thoughtfulness. If I'm set in the shirt and tie department, and my girl knows this, then when I get a shirt and tie for Xmas, I got the right to say she didn't put much thought into the gift.

As far as far as getting expensive sheet for my girlfriend. Me na do. I don't buy chicks expensive **** or designer clothes.

I make sure I give my girl a constant supply of thoughtful gift through out the year. Never go overboard on gifts (spending thousands) on B-days, Xmas, Valentines.

If you don't half-asz taking care of your woman, she can't/won't say sheet when you don't break the bank on Xmas.

Last year my girl spent $250 on me and I spent around $400. Both of us were incredibly happy with our gifts because we could tell the other person pull some thought into them

 

[Mark Antony]

Naw dudes sometimes give off that "I don't really want anything" vibe, so you can't blame em if they believe it and go "well he doesn't want anything, but i'll get him a lil something anyways". Even if that's not the case, it's not a good thing to consider material items value to the relationship.

 

[tee eye ehm]

Had a discussion with a girl on Twitters
Basically she says: It isn't love if you are comparing the value of gifts given/received.
I say: There is no way NOT TO compare the value of gifts given/received. If I give you a $3000 Coach Purse (or whatever yall like) and you give me a shirt and tie, I am "wrong" for saying oBetter ? Please.
Of course she hits me with a bunch of Disney mumbo jumbo, but I feel it is impossible to not compare.

$3000 Coach purse?!? If you really bought that, then

But as for the topic...Yes it is impossible to compare, thats human nature.

BUT....dont put yourselves in that position and create xmas wish list and set a cap. Thats what me and my girl do every year.

 

[budgetballer]

I told my girl she wont get a ring cause I always be splurging and I get socks and video games.

Well, low and behold, I got a 64" T.V. from her for my bday...suffice it to say..she got her ring 

 

[powerballin]

DC I hear you man.  Its not even about the money. Its the sacrifice or thought that went into making the present a great gift.  You know when somebody gives you a BS gift with no thought put in it.  Also you know how much it meant to spend that bread.  So if you work extra shifts to buy her some red bottoms you would def want to feel the love when you receive her present. 

 

[gatzbygordon]

if you can get her a 30k purse or w.e then aiight, dont get urself into debt over a damn gift...are you in a relationship? because alot of these crazy scenarios that are brought up on here hardly ever occur in relationships..or at least i havent encountered anything close to these situations in the ones i've been involved in..it also shouldnt matter to you if you also really "love" the person...i have never gotten anything over 40 bux for a chick until this year i went to the pawn shop lookin for music equipment and i saw a gold ring with my birthstone, all jewelry was 70% off so i got her that, not to mention shes bought me stuff throughout the year, i didnt ask for any of it, she just did it as a nice gesture.

sometimes its just the thought that counts, and also if she gotchu something that cheap then maybe she just thinks you like cheap ish.

 

[scarsorscabs]

Are you sure you're talking about love? Do you care more about the gift or the person giving said gift?

You are reading too much into it.

Simply put,

If I am in a relationship with a girl and the gift I give her is WAY more expensive than what she gives me, and I "notice" it, I was told that I don't REALLY love her.

I just think that is a crock of bull......

It doesn't mean you don't really love her but if by notice you mean you bring it up to her and make it an issue, it's petty and kind of shows what's important to you.

 

[Master Zik]

Are you sure you're talking about love? Do you care more about the gift or the person giving said gift?

You are reading too much into it.

Simply put,

If I am in a relationship with a girl and the gift I give her is WAY more expensive than what she gives me, and I "notice" it, I was told that I don't REALLY love her.

I just think that is a crock of bull......

That begs the question do you actually love her? Noticing a discrepancy in the price of a gift can be petty in certain situations, petty enough to question whether or not you love them. Why are you buying this expensive gift? Why are you expecting yours to be around the same price?

I will say I don't see what love has to do with situation so what the female said to you is a bit dubious.

 

[ksteezy]

Wait WUT?....DC bought someone a gift?...an expensive one at that?...fam I thought you lived in a secluded farm and wear OshKosh overalls....I swear to God that's how I've always pictured you....and I didn't know you spent money on ANYTHING.