Hinge Takeover >>> Tinder, Bumble Pof

Sums up a lot of my dating issues. But, I know better now..

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how much of this is really your lived experience tho?

I understand there's time wasters out there....

But how does one fall into one of these positions? Like what is this keep chasing? If a woman isn't being reciprocal just move on. If she wants you I promise she will make it extremely easy for you. If it's a "challenge" or difficult she isn't playing hard to get she just doesn't want you.

almost everything in popular culture, especially if a guy isn't one of them ones in some regard, tells men to over pursue (conversely a lot of dudes think if gyal make it easy, she prolly for the skreet, they don't deep that concept of actually being desirable) and in the marketplace most women are lapping most dudes in terms of the appearance of options/opportunities

I do think more men are turning into *****es. So I dont really blame some of these women.

"She needs to text me first"
"I'm only splitting the bill"

Yes you should chase. Men having been courting women since the beginning of time. There's a fine line though where you still have to have some self respect for yourself.

You'll know right away if you're wasting your time. And if you continue chasing knowing this, thats on you.

i think guys that are even on this type of time have enough optionality to enact it or are coping with their lack of options, that noted given that we are in this era of egalitarianism where boy & girls, and young men & women are kinda being told they are more or less interchangeable, that rationale is logical but flawed; women are not going to find most men attractive enough to be the one to initiate conversation with men randomly (isn't this why the dating app where women had to test 1st failed 😂)

because so much interaction is happening via text & not in person, there is a lot less clarity about the time wasting aspects

I usually find incel dudes posting this on social. Mind you these are the same dudes that follow all these IG "models" and like their posts and gas them up

Dudes gotta stop treating women like mythical creatures that are above them.

There are plenty of women out there. Learn how to walk away and live your life.

Women should not be the source of your happiness. You are inadvertently giving people control of you if they are the source of your happiness.

Not every girl is going to like you and that is ok.

🤷🏿‍♂️ i really think that social media & the splintering of media has just exposed more of how men think & made more of the 'barbershop/lockerroom' talk, visible & on record, (the amount of women i know that speak w/confidence about the men they know not having certain opinions but those men just don't say those things in the same ways the appear online is funny! 😂) there were always man that pedestalize women, arguably that is closer to the default than not; most guys (to varying degrees) are used to this dynamic, they had unc losing his mind outchea:

 
how much of this is really your lived experience tho?



almost everything in popular culture, especially if a guy isn't one of them ones in some regard, tells men to over pursue (conversely a lot of dudes think if gyal make it easy, she prolly for the skreet, they don't deep that concept of being desirable) and in the marketplace most women are lapping most dudes in terms of the appearance of options/opportunities



i think guys that are even on this type of time have enough optionality to enact it or are coping with their lack of options, that noted given that we are in this era of egalitarianism where boy & girls, and young men & women are kinda being told they are more or less interchangeable, that rationale is logical but flawed; women are not going to find most men attractive enough to be the one to initiate conversation with men randomly (isn't this why the dating app where women had to test 1st failed 😂)

because so much interaction is happening via text & not in person, there is a lot less clarity about the time wasting aspects



🤷🏿‍♂️ i really think that social media & the splintering of media has just exposed more of how men think & made more of the 'barbershop/lockerroom' talk, visible & on record, (the amount of women i know that speak w/confidence about the men they know not having certain opinions but those men just don't say those things in the same ways the appear online is funny! 😂) there were always man that pedestalize women, arguably that is closer to the default than not; most guys (to varying degrees) are used to this dynamic, they had unc losing his mind outchea:



(I'm just responding to your reply to me)

I do agree, an average looking woman does have more options for potential partners than an average looking man, but if we're being honest that's mainly due to men and our lack of restraint and sexual discipline. It will never happen but if men stop taking anything we can get it wouldn't be like this. Men outnumber women on every dating app by a wide margin. I know dating apps don't give us the full scope of an accurate representation of the dating marketplace but it does show a problem. For men it's feast or famine and it's very little middle ground.
 
Well gents, just got a confirmed 1st date for Saturday off Bumble! Taking this woman to an upscale sushi spot. Haven't been on a date in over 2 1/2 years. So I'm a little rusty. But looking forward to it. Wish me luck!

Welp, 1st date is in the books. Overall it went good. Met up with the woman Saturday night. First thing I noticed was that she looked exactly like her pictures (thank goodness). But we got to talking and I learned a lot about her. Even things that weren't verbally communicated. For starters, shes 40, light skin, nice figure, and black/Guatemalan.
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She's pretty chill and laid back. I played it pretty cool. Talked just enough about myself but didn't go too in depth. Tried to keep the convo light and humorous. I feel like she reciprocated pretty well. At the end we hugged and went our separate ways. I'll ask her out again tomorrow and see how it goes.
 
(I'm just responding to your reply to me)

I do agree, an average looking woman does have more options for potential partners than an average looking man, but if we're being honest that's mainly due to men and our lack of restraint and sexual discipline. It will never happen but if men stop taking anything we can get it wouldn't be like this. Men outnumber women on every dating app by a wide margin. I know dating apps don't give us the full scope of an accurate representation of the dating marketplace but it does show a problem. For men it's feast or famine and it's very little middle ground.

#itiswhatitis™️ even if man is above average in every conceivable metric, that man still is going to have to ‘chase’ to some extent…and you just detailed the mindset/state of being for many man as ‘feast or famine’ but more accurate to say it is ‘subsistence or famine’ if we talking about men in general; do you think most men ever really get to it like that? a lot of guys can’t wait to lock in & get out of the market
 
I usually find incel dudes posting this on social. Mind you these are the same dudes that follow all these IG "models" and like their posts and gas them up

Dudes gotta stop treating women like mythical creatures that are above them.

There are plenty of women out there. Learn how to walk away and live your life.

Women should not be the source of your happiness. You are inadvertently giving people control of you if they are the source of your happiness.

Not every girl is going to like you and that is ok.
It took a very long time to learn this. To be honest, I still struggle with this a bit.
 
#itiswhatitis™️ even if man is above average in every conceivable metric, that man still is going to have to ‘chase’ to some extent…and you just detailed the mindset/state of being for many man as ‘feast or famine’ but more accurate to say it is ‘subsistence or famine’ if we talking about men in general; do you think most men ever really get to it like that? a lot of guys can’t wait to lock in & get out of the market

Final results from my swiping in Denver. (like 2 of the matches are from my hometown cause I’m traveling today for the holidays)

45 Matches in a little over 24 hrs. Decent prospects IMO. For context I swiped for the duration of 2 Power episodes on Hulu. So about 80 min of non stop swiping. Also didn’t send any comments on messages just like and kept it moving. Every woman isn’t my type but I swiped on what I thought most men would deem “attractive”.

Hinge should pay me b. But if you’re going to get the most out of the app you have to pay. It’s a numbers game. Still sitting with 1 match on Tinder and Bumble each cause they’re boost heavy apps.

Back when I was on the apps for reference, now I got a main joint and I've been off them for a cool 8 months but for a year and a half it was hard for me to take any woman serious or really want to be locked in cause it "felt" like the options were unlimited. But after a while it gets old, the same conversation, balancing dates and multiple plans with people get exhausting and expensive.

So IMO if you're a man who does well on the apps or has decent to consistent success on them there doesn't feel like any pressure to lock in. It really boils down to when you get tired of it.
 
Would you/what's the furthest you traveled to see someone?
 
For the first time?

2.5 hours to Austin. What’s crazy is she let me stay at her crib but in a separate room. Didn’t eem hit :{

Needless to say that was one and done
Yeah I don't know the woman personally, but it's some socialite(ish) person in Dallas I came across on Snap.

Conversation is good, but anything can happen or not when we actually meet up.

I'll have to find a reason to even go out there to begin with.
 
Yeah I don't know the woman personally, but it's some socialite(ish) person in Dallas I came across on Snap.

Conversation is good, but anything can happen or not when we actually meet up.

I'll have to find a reason to even go out there to begin with.
Please tell me you have other socials of her or at least a number as well. Have y’all actually talked on the phone or video chatted?

Don’t go traveling to somewhere just for the sake of smashing (especially if y’all never kicked it before). Have an itinerary at the minimum because if she catfish you or the yambs are trash, you gonna be hella pissed.
 
I caught a flight out to the DR to see my Dominican wifey after we linked up the last time I was there.

Other than that, can’t say I really travelled like that just for one chick other than a atl broad who was on games but I still linked with other women during that time
 
Please tell me you have other socials of her or at least a number as well. Have y’all actually talked on the phone or video chatted?

Don’t go traveling to somewhere just for the sake of smashing (especially if y’all never kicked it before). Have an itinerary at the minimum because if she catfish you or the yambs are trash, you gonna be hella pissed.
Everything is through text or voice memos. I'm going off photos/stories as far as appearance.
 
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