Confessions

I've self diagnosed myself wrong for the most part of 2013 Any minor occurrences on my body like skin irritation from exercise I freak out.   ... I constantly think I have an STD even though I get tested and have no symptoms. I thought I had HIV and was depressed until I tested negative. My latest fear is Syphilis even though I've been test recently. I had protected sex a few weeks ago and constantly worried I have the disease. Even though it's WELL past the amount of time it takes for symptoms to show.

It's unhealthy and mentally debilitating I actually went to bed at an decent hour tonight and when my girl climbed into bed I went to the bathroom and saw a pimple on my chest. I examined it for about 20 mins then Googled symptoms and pictures of Syphilis for about 2 hours now. I get obsessive and overwhelmed to the point of tears.

My last STD test I actually cried tears of joy ...it's not limited to HIV and STD's, I constantly fear a heart attack or airborne sickness from the subway as well. 

I was prescribed anxiety meds to reduce serotonin levels but I won't take them I don't want to be a pill poppin' med junkie. I already learned to control my diabetes in under 2 months  because I didn't want to continue to take pills. I want to get over this fear.

Abstinence or monogamy truly might be the only way to cure my phobia. Deep down I think it maybe guilt from my wrong doing and I believe there should be a punishment more severe than the guilt itself.
i felt this way for about a year and i realized it was all out of guilt. i was guilty about being promiscuous and overreacted to any slight tinge i felt in my body, or irritation on my skin. it's like an impending doom that you know is bound to catch up with you for what you seem to have gotten away with. i assure you that you're probably fine. the real pain is internal... focus on healing that in holistic ways. no anxiety pill can do for you what you can't do for yourself. it's all in the mind.
 
Good luck on whatever you are recovering from Sir Charles.

My gym is closed as it is being renovated. I camt workout this week.


I have a lot of physical injuries.

You don't need the gym to work out. Run a few miles around the area, do some push ups and sit ups at home. I do an extensive work out at home, the gym is no exuse.
 
I'm not religious and I can't stand it when Christians try to talk to me about their religion.

All my exes were Christians. 
 
Good luck on whatever you are recovering from Sir Charles.

My gym is closed as it is being renovated. I camt workout this week.

Was supposed to get a tattoo today but my artist couldnt get it to work with my dark skin. So i will reschedule to start my sleeves soon since that is the lightest part of my body. I wanted to wait till the gym starts paying off to get on these sleeves but it is looking like that wont happen.

Also also a couple chicks stared at me today. Not sure if good looking or extremely bad looking. Prolly just liked the outfit. It weirds me out when we lock eyes cuz idk if they think I am creeping or....?

When girls are staring its usually a good thing..
As long as she ain't makin a wierd face or nothin lol
 
Nice, stay strong fam

Man my ex and I follow each other on instagram and damn she posted a picture today and she looks good. Haven't seen her in over 4 years since she is living in so cal. Was in her area last week and didn't make a very good attempt to hang out and she was mad :{ only chick I've ever actually loved :(
 
I'm only playing football so I can at least get a scholarship for college.
I like a girl that has a BF, seems like she's perfect, i'll be ight doe :(
Been feeling kinda empty inside.
 
I have a 2 year old daughter i havent met, and probably never will.

Please be careful with the type of females you deal with. All i got is pictures off fb. This aint what you want 
mean.gif
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:( i almost shed a tear. Shes going to think you left her too :{

I was actually going to make a thread about it a few days back. I wanted to know about having a kid outside a household. (Mother and father dont live together). I told my mom i want a kid or in the distant future but i dont want a wife. She wasnt having it.
 
I hate when chicks brag about being independent.. Like do you want a cookie or something because you can take care of your responsibilities and maintain your finances?
Thats all apart of being grown imo.. Its no such thing as a independent man..
 
I think its sexy since nost girls have proven themselves useless to me. But its a huge turn off when they brag about it.
 
I hate when chicks brag about being independent.. Like do you want a cookie or something because you can take care of your responsibilities and maintain your finances?
Thats all apart of being grown imo.. Its no such thing as a independent man..
Deserves it own thread.  I agree completely.  Take it how you want but as a west indian male I see many american black women doing this and I'm less than happy this mentality is spreading to caribbean women.
 
I've been with my girl soon to be 5 years .I've been faithful since we've known each other and she has held me down like a good chick should. I do love the girl but I am turned off by the fact that she likes to talk about marriage and kids and whatnot. Were both 22 and I feel like she's getting ahead of herself and we still got allot of living to do. She sometimes comes off as a little clingy in my eyes because she always wants to see/be with me. Could just be me being shallow though

So you guys have been going out for 5 years and graduated college together (I assume) and you're not thinking about marriage? What is your plan? 5 years is a LONG time.
 
^lol. People out there who get married after longer than that. People out there never get married despite dating for forever. You act like they have to get married for their relationship to mean something
 
^lol. People out there who get married after longer than that. People out there never get married despite dating for forever. You act like they have to get married for their relationship to mean something


So you guys have been going out for 5 years and graduated college together (I assume) and you're not thinking about marriage? What is your plan? 5 years is a LONG time.


True but as a woman i kind of understand where the girl is coming from...22 is rather young however...but essentially its like you guys have already been married. At any rate have you expressed your feelings to her that its a turnoff? if she dosent know she may think you are right on board with it.
 
I've been with my girl soon to be 5 years .I've been faithful since we've known each other and she has held me down like a good chick should. I do love the girl but I am turned off by the fact that she likes to talk about marriage and kids and whatnot. Were both 22 and I feel like she's getting ahead of herself and we still got allot of living to do. She sometimes comes off as a little clingy in my eyes because she always wants to see/be with me. Could just be me being shallow though
She's fishing for assurances and gauging your feelings.

Just tell her there are things you are trying to do before you even touch that subject and leave it at that. Let your actions speak for your feelings.

Dudes get in trouble for talking too much. But you'll learn to appreciate that clingy-ness over time.
 
She's fishing for assurances and gauging your feelings.

Just tell her there are things you are trying to do before you even touch that subject and leave it at that. Let your actions speak for your feelings.

Dudes get in trouble for talking too much. But you'll learn to appreciate that clingy-ness over time.

Yes very true because if she is not on you she will be on somebody else with the quickness
 
Yeah beautiful woman that loves you and clings won't last if you keep acting cool and put off. Just communicate and be honest like "I'm not going anywhere babe, but there's things to be done before that move."
 
She's fishing for assurances and gauging your feelings.

Just tell her there are things you are trying to do before you even touch that subject and leave it at that. Let your actions speak for your feelings.

Dudes get in trouble for talking too much. But you'll learn to appreciate that clingy-ness over time.

I don't know if I can appreciate clingy-ness. I always thought it was girls with HUGE daddy issues. I do love the attention however. I used to talk to a girl but from the start I knew I couldn't take her serious.
 
i suffer from depression/social anxiety from time to time.

also i generally don't trust people.
 
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