Black Culture Discussion Thread

Do y'all feel like the OG's have done enough to pay it forward? I remember Tariq had said about year or so ago that old n's ain't leaders. I was neutral on his statement but I'm starting to believe there's some merit to his statement.

So, I'm with my father and his estate attorney as my father signed some POA and Will docs. I was present as I needed to sign some of the POA docs.

While waiting for my father to complete signing the documents I struck up a conversation with the estate attorney. The estate attorney is a black man in his early 70's. I'm almost 40 and my father is in his early 60's so I felt like this convo would be fruitful as I would shut my mouth and listen to the OG chop up game.

For the record, I understand that my father is his client and not me. I also understand the attorney does not owe me a response.

So, long story short we start talking about the two brothers at OSU that got jammed up over a women (I presume white) on campus. She gave consent on video, yet the case ended up going to trial. I asked the OG, from one black man to another, what's the best way legally to govern myself when it comes to the opposite sex. My question was more so general best practices as I did not retain him as my attorney.

His response to me "Know what kind of woman you are dealing with". Respectfully, what the f kind of answer is that? We can only know what a woman allows us to know about them. How many women flat out say their intentions are to play the child support/alimony hustle or to lie about the consensual encounter because she didn't get what she wanted post-sex.

I know the game is to be sold not told so if it was really about some bread, he could just said that. I have no problem scheduling a consultation and paying for it. All i was doing was killing some time. Not to be petty but he (the atty) did show up late for meeting which was the second time he was late (we only had two meetings).

This experience got me to thinking. I really don't have any black men in their 70's or older that has really tried to chop up game. My grandfathers are deceased. My pops is my right hand man, but, I'm humble enough to shut my mouth and listen to my elders that are older than my pops.

Have any of y'all ever had an OG (non-family) sit down with you and give you the game? I feel like that's missing. I don't want your money. I'm even willing to pay for dinner just to soak up any knowledge.

Did i also mention his is a member of the local black bourgeoisie? He made sure to mention that to me and my pops during the first meeting.
 
3900stabler said:
Do y'all feel like the OG's have done enough to pay it forward? I remember Tariq had said about year or so ago that old n's ain't leaders. I was neutral on his statement but I'm starting to believe there's some merit to his statement.

So, I'm with my father and his estate attorney as my father signed some POA and Will docs. I was present as I needed to sign some of the POA docs.

While waiting for my father to complete signing the documents I struck up a conversation with the estate attorney. The estate attorney is a black man in his early 70's. I'm almost 40 and my father is in his early 60's so I felt like this convo would be fruitful as I would shut my mouth and listen to the OG chop up game.

For the record, I understand that my father is his client and not me. I also understand the attorney does not owe me a response.

So, long story short we start talking about the two brothers at OSU that got jammed up over a women (I presume white) on campus. She gave consent on video, yet the case ended up going to trial. I asked the OG, from one black man to another, what's the best way legally to govern myself when it comes to the opposite sex. My question was more so general best practices as I did not retain him as my attorney.

His response to me "Know what kind of woman you are dealing with". Respectfully, what the f kind of answer is that? We can only know what a woman allows us to know about them. How many women flat out say their intentions are to play the child support/alimony hustle or to lie about the consensual encounter because she didn't get what she wanted post-sex.

I know the game is to be sold not told so if it was really about some bread, he could just said that. I have no problem scheduling a consultation and paying for it. All i was doing was killing some time. Not to be petty but he (the atty) did show up late for meeting which was the second time he was late (we only had two meetings).

This experience got me to thinking. I really don't have any black men in their 70's or older that has really tried to chop up game. My grandfathers are deceased. My pops is my right hand man, but, I'm humble enough to shut my mouth and listen to my elders that are older than my pops.

Have any of y'all ever had an OG (non-family) sit down with you and give you the game? I feel like that's missing. I don't want your money. I'm even willing to pay for dinner just to soak up any knowledge.

Did i also mention his is a member of the local black bourgeoisie? He made sure to mention that to me and my pops during the first meeting.
Click to expand...

Notice how you formed an entire opinion about a 70-year-old man from one sentence?

Do the same with women.

People tell you who they are if you shut up long enough.
 
3900stabler said:
Do y'all feel like the OG's have done enough to pay it forward? I remember Tariq had said about year or so ago that old n's ain't leaders. I was neutral on his statement but I'm starting to believe there's some merit to his statement.
Click to expand...


To be fair that was an impossible question to answer. There's no real prevent defense to the initial news/backlash of a lie or a he said she said type situation.

In regards to your initial question of course not. The majority of it is I did it on my own or I went through this so you should too mentality.




 
3900stabler said:
His response to me "Know what kind of woman you are dealing with". Respectfully, what the f kind of answer is that?
Click to expand...
A good one?

If you believe you are a prime target for getting “trapped” then you are in the wrong environment/social circles. And if you are worried about accusations then take some time to get to know the woman before sleeping with her. All it takes is a little conversation and observation. There is no magic legal protection for the stresses that come with fighting a case and the permanent stain on your reputation regardless of the outcome.
 
3900stabler said:
Do y'all feel like the OG's have done enough to pay it forward? I remember Tariq had said about year or so ago that old n's ain't leaders. I was neutral on his statement but I'm starting to believe there's some merit to his statement.

So, I'm with my father and his estate attorney as my father signed some POA and Will docs. I was present as I needed to sign some of the POA docs.

While waiting for my father to complete signing the documents I struck up a conversation with the estate attorney. The estate attorney is a black man in his early 70's. I'm almost 40 and my father is in his early 60's so I felt like this convo would be fruitful as I would shut my mouth and listen to the OG chop up game.

For the record, I understand that my father is his client and not me. I also understand the attorney does not owe me a response.

So, long story short we start talking about the two brothers at OSU that got jammed up over a women (I presume white) on campus. She gave consent on video, yet the case ended up going to trial. I asked the OG, from one black man to another, what's the best way legally to govern myself when it comes to the opposite sex. My question was more so general best practices as I did not retain him as my attorney.

His response to me "Know what kind of woman you are dealing with". Respectfully, what the f kind of answer is that? We can only know what a woman allows us to know about them. How many women flat out say their intentions are to play the child support/alimony hustle or to lie about the consensual encounter because she didn't get what she wanted post-sex.

I know the game is to be sold not told so if it was really about some bread, he could just said that. I have no problem scheduling a consultation and paying for it. All i was doing was killing some time. Not to be petty but he (the atty) did show up late for meeting which was the second time he was late (we only had two meetings).

This experience got me to thinking. I really don't have any black men in their 70's or older that has really tried to chop up game. My grandfathers are deceased. My pops is my right hand man, but, I'm humble enough to shut my mouth and listen to my elders that are older than my pops.

Have any of y'all ever had an OG (non-family) sit down with you and give you the game? I feel like that's missing. I don't want your money. I'm even willing to pay for dinner just to soak up any knowledge.

Did i also mention his is a member of the local black bourgeoisie? He made sure to mention that to me and my pops during the first meeting.
Click to expand...

You can’t be 40 years and still don’t understand how to discern the character traits of a woman.

Ask them QUESTIONS. Simple as that. If a woman doesn’t want to answer questions, then it’s a red flag. Probe.

You’re more mad at the “old head” for saying “know what type of women you’re dealing with”…. Instead of the women who prey upon weak man. :lol: :lol:

The same standard of accountability you’re expecting from the older guy, is the same you should expect from a woman.

The game literally is to be sold, not told

You can’t be almost 40 and don’t know what women are about. You’ve already lived half a lifetime.

You asked the older guy, but have you asked your dad the same questions? We’ve gotten to the point that adults over complicated relationships and interactions with the opposite sex.

If you have basic communication skills and are observant, you should know which women to weed out.
 
Last edited:
3900stabler said:
Do y'all feel like the OG's have done enough to pay it forward? I remember Tariq had said about year or so ago that old n's ain't leaders. I was neutral on his statement but I'm starting to believe there's some merit to his statement.

So, I'm with my father and his estate attorney as my father signed some POA and Will docs. I was present as I needed to sign some of the POA docs.

While waiting for my father to complete signing the documents I struck up a conversation with the estate attorney. The estate attorney is a black man in his early 70's. I'm almost 40 and my father is in his early 60's so I felt like this convo would be fruitful as I would shut my mouth and listen to the OG chop up game.

For the record, I understand that my father is his client and not me. I also understand the attorney does not owe me a response.

So, long story short we start talking about the two brothers at OSU that got jammed up over a women (I presume white) on campus. She gave consent on video, yet the case ended up going to trial. I asked the OG, from one black man to another, what's the best way legally to govern myself when it comes to the opposite sex. My question was more so general best practices as I did not retain him as my attorney.

His response to me "Know what kind of woman you are dealing with". Respectfully, what the f kind of answer is that? We can only know what a woman allows us to know about them. How many women flat out say their intentions are to play the child support/alimony hustle or to lie about the consensual encounter because she didn't get what she wanted post-sex.

I know the game is to be sold not told so if it was really about some bread, he could just said that. I have no problem scheduling a consultation and paying for it. All i was doing was killing some time. Not to be petty but he (the atty) did show up late for meeting which was the second time he was late (we only had two meetings).

This experience got me to thinking. I really don't have any black men in their 70's or older that has really tried to chop up game. My grandfathers are deceased. My pops is my right hand man, but, I'm humble enough to shut my mouth and listen to my elders that are older than my pops.

Have any of y'all ever had an OG (non-family) sit down with you and give you the game? I feel like that's missing. I don't want your money. I'm even willing to pay for dinner just to soak up any knowledge.

Did i also mention his is a member of the local black bourgeoisie? He made sure to mention that to me and my pops during the first meeting.
Click to expand...

respectfully, what were you expecting really?? legal advice in how to deal w/women? did you think he was going to tell you how to hide assets or setup an offshore or shell corporation so that these womenz can’t get to ya coins 😆

whenever i’m around folk that are the ogs, i literally have to stop them from giving their advice 😮‍💨😂 but it’s always an interesting back & forth about their day as compared to now…while there are truisms that would seem to be more or less eternal/universal it’s funny seeing their exasperation when explaining the differences…

i would anecdotally tend to agree w/the sentiment that there might be a lack of ‘giving the game’ especially these times, but 1 the game done changed & 2 given the lack of community in many places, that generation of men may not feel like their wisdom, such that it is actually wisdom; would be taken or even appreciated which is compounded by the fact that many households lack any male representation

Present said:
Notice how you formed an entire opinion about a 70-year-old man from one sentence?

Do the same with women.

People tell you who they are if you shut up long enough.
Click to expand...

definitely agree that over a long enough time, folk do show themselves…snap judgements can be misleading tho
 
Last edited:
For instance me and my father have a COMPLETELY different outlook on woman. I took after my uncle and older cousin (10 years older) my dad was 21 when he had me.

He’s a staunch traditionalist. Man pays the bills, wife works if she wants, her money is hers, pay a bill like the light bill. Other than that, the man takes care of everything.

That’s not how I operate (but my pops grew up in a two parent household, parents were married, dad did all the heavy lifting)

I grew up the opposite. My mom was a single mother, worked everyday and took care of home.

My younger brothers took after my dad because he raised them under his roof, with their mom.

Me and my dad have nothing in common as far as women, my uncle and cousin is who I gravitate too. Their approach was that women hold their weight and contribute as well.

But again, it’s all about preference. I learned absolutely nothing about women from from my dad and really, I never needed too.

His approach to women has always been lame to me but it’s COOL. He does what works for him which is okay.
 
finessence said:
You can’t be 40 years and still don’t understand how to discern the character traits of a woman.

Ask them QUESTIONS. Simple as that. If a woman doesn’t want to answer questions, then it’s a red flag. Probe.

You’re more mad at the “old head” for saying “know what type of women you’re dealing with”…. Instead of the women who prey upon weak man. :lol: :lol:

The same standard of accountability you’re expecting from the older guy, is the same you should expect from a woman.

The game literally is to be sold, not told

You can’t be almost 40 and don’t know what women are about. You’ve already lived half a lifetime.

You asked the older guy, but have you asked your dad the same questions? We’ve gotten to the point that adults over complicated relationships and interactions with the opposite sex.

If you have basic communication skills and are observant, you should know which women to weed out.
Click to expand...

often interpersonal interactions actually are complicated (ask anyone who works in corporate or moves to a different locale and has to learn the vibe of a new place), especially when parties are unfamiliar…and we often make assumptions from our own (limited) perspective(s)…to me i don’t think being 40 (or whatever arbitrary age) automatically means anything, and we don’t know his story so who knows what his experiences with women actually are…

arguably most people aren’t all that good with (by which i mean: being authentically charming, observant, & persuasive not just the ability to get along) other people as a general rule & this maybe particularly true that most men aren’t all that good with women…and surely one could take the position that neither is all that necessary, one only really needs to be good w/understand the one(s) there are with/in proximity to. given the way the current environment of the past couple decades has changed the way we all interact, relationships don’t appear to be as solid/steady for many reasons some of which are good/bad and some that just are…as such it is an environment that is indeed more complicated for both men & women alike…

as an aside i think that the ‘game is to be sold not told’ mentality is under stable because nothing is really free but is also kinda a detrimental one when taken literally
 
3900stabler said:
Do y'all feel like the OG's have done enough to pay it forward? I remember Tariq had said about year or so ago that old n's ain't leaders. I was neutral on his statement but I'm starting to believe there's some merit to his statement.

So, I'm with my father and his estate attorney as my father signed some POA and Will docs. I was present as I needed to sign some of the POA docs.

While waiting for my father to complete signing the documents I struck up a conversation with the estate attorney. The estate attorney is a black man in his early 70's. I'm almost 40 and my father is in his early 60's so I felt like this convo would be fruitful as I would shut my mouth and listen to the OG chop up game.

For the record, I understand that my father is his client and not me. I also understand the attorney does not owe me a response.

So, long story short we start talking about the two brothers at OSU that got jammed up over a women (I presume white) on campus. She gave consent on video, yet the case ended up going to trial. I asked the OG, from one black man to another, what's the best way legally to govern myself when it comes to the opposite sex. My question was more so general best practices as I did not retain him as my attorney.

His response to me "Know what kind of woman you are dealing with". Respectfully, what the f kind of answer is that? We can only know what a woman allows us to know about them. How many women flat out say their intentions are to play the child support/alimony hustle or to lie about the consensual encounter because she didn't get what she wanted post-sex.

I know the game is to be sold not told so if it was really about some bread, he could just said that. I have no problem scheduling a consultation and paying for it. All i was doing was killing some time. Not to be petty but he (the atty) did show up late for meeting which was the second time he was late (we only had two meetings).

This experience got me to thinking. I really don't have any black men in their 70's or older that has really tried to chop up game. My grandfathers are deceased. My pops is my right hand man, but, I'm humble enough to shut my mouth and listen to my elders that are older than my pops.

Have any of y'all ever had an OG (non-family) sit down with you and give you the game? I feel like that's missing. I don't want your money. I'm even willing to pay for dinner just to soak up any knowledge.

Did i also mention his is a member of the local black bourgeoisie? He made sure to mention that to me and my pops during the first meeting.
Click to expand...
Best advice an older black man ever gave me was if my flat tire is rusted on and won't come off, to take my spare tire and throw it at the flat.

**** has yet to fail me. Can't imagine how many curse words I haven't had to utter thanks to this advice.
 
trynafeelmink said:
Can't really think of too many elderly men that have given me important advice. But honestly the world is so different between current times & the world of someone who's 70-80
Click to expand...
I've gotten good advice, but many of them don't know how to approach the youth. Maybe they've done so already in the past and have been rejected. Seen it numerous times first hand.
 
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