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Your mom so nasty she did the splits and stained the carpet
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Originally Posted by razzle dazzle
you so stupid you tried drowning a fish
you so stupid you tried to kill a bird by throwing it off a cliff
Originally Posted by The Great Hibachi
Originally Posted by razzle dazzle
you so stupid you tried drowning a fish
you so stupid you tried to kill a bird by throwing it off a cliff
This one had me dyin'Originally Posted by tee eye ehm
NEWS REPORT: 3 Brazilian children were killed in a burning building.
GEORGE BUSH: Oh my LORD!! How many is a brazilian?!
That is a smart people joke. On the other handOriginally Posted by eeBS7eez
an engineer shows up to work with a new bike. anothee engineer asks "where did you get that?". he responds "it's a funny story. i was walking to work and a girl stops in front of me on a bike. she takes all her clothes off and stands beside the bike and asks me 'pick what you want'." the other engineer replies "good call. the clothes would have never fit you."
Originally Posted by smoothrick007
A college teacher reminds her class of tomorrow's final exam. "Now class, I won't tolerate any excuses for you not being here tomorrow. I might consider a nuclear attack or a serious personal injury or illness, or a death in your immediate family, but that's it, no other excuses whatsoever!" A smart %%+ guy in the back of the room raised his hand and asked, "What would you say if tomorrow I said I was suffering from complete and utter sexual exhaustion?" The entire class is reduced to laughter and snickering. When silence is restored, the teacher smiles knowingly at the student, shakes her head and sweetly says "Well, I guess you'd have to write the exam with your other hand."
Originally Posted by RiKaN HaVoK
Two IT guys were talking in a bar after work. "Guess what,"
says the first IT guy, "yesterday, I met this gorgeous
blonde in a bar."
"What did you do?" says the other IT guy.
"Well, I invited her over to my place, we had a couple of
drinks, we got into the mood and then she suddenly asked me
to take all her clothes off."
"You're kidding me!" says the second IT guy.
"I took her miniskirt off, and then I lifted her and put her
on my desk next to my new laptop."
"Really? You got a new laptop?"
Originally Posted by theDEEK
Why did the koala fall out of the tree?
Spoiler [+]because it was dead.
Why did the parrot fall out of the tree?
Spoiler [+]because it was stapled to the koala.
lmaoOriginally Posted by freezelle
This one had me dyin'Originally Posted by tee eye ehm
NEWS REPORT: 3 Brazilian children were killed in a burning building.
GEORGE BUSH: Oh my LORD!! How many is a brazilian?!
Originally Posted by theDEEK
Why did the koala fall out of the tree?
Spoiler [+]because it was dead.
Why did the parrot fall out of the tree?
Spoiler [+]because it was stapled to the koala.
Originally Posted by CROSSISOM
Originally Posted by Ripfan8I6
Three guys are hanging outside of a brothel, the first goes in and comes out 5 minutes later with a large smile and says, "I gave her $10 and she put 2 pineapple rings on my $%** and ate them off." The second guys goes in and comes back with a smile on his face and says, "I gave her $15 and she put 4 pineapple rings on my $%** and ate them off." The last guy goes in and come out with a frown on his face and said, "I gave her $20 and she put 6 pineapple rings on my $%**, a handful of crushed nuts, a sugar wafer, hot chocolate sauce, and topped off with a beautiful red cherry." Guy 2 says, " So what's the problem?" and he answered, "At first it was great but it looked so good I ate it myself"