Asian Culture Discussion Thread

[equality]

Inspired by the Black Culture Discussion Thread

Some stereotypes we need to address:

- Lack of masculinity

- Low self confidence/self esteem

- No talents outside of studying

- Lack of success with women

How do we improve and break out of society's limitations?

*Those stereotypes aren't things I agree with, just judgements and perceptions I know for a fact non-asians have of us

 

[wj4]

Inspired by the Black Culture Discussion Thread

Some stereotypes we need to address:
- Lack of masculinity
- Low self confidence/self esteem
- No talents outside of studying
- Lack of success with women

How do we improve and break out of society's limitations?

It goes both ways. You just described the fobs. On the other end of the spectrum, there's the Asians that are tatted up and basically the same as other ethnicities...work out, regular jobs, clubbing and getting yams.

There are no limitations, you only set that yourself. Gotta keep that mentality. Get values and goals for yourself and rock out. Surround yourself with like minded individuals. Reach the goals and enjoy life.

 

[slighted]

 
Some stereotypes we need to address:

- Lack of masculinity

- Low self confidence/self esteem

- No talents outside of studying

- Lack of success with women

How do we improve and break out of society's limitations?

We're all different. In my experience:

1.) Lift hard and lift a lot

2.) Be confident but humble and willing to mold and learn

3.) Chase money and your own interests

4.) Dominican girls love me, so I don't know about other Asian folks

All the points you raised above usually apply to fobs / children of extreme Tiger moms.

 

[HEATHEN]

Are south Asians welcome to this thread or should we just


View media item 1614438

 

[JPS]

In for later.

when I was in my teens I spent most of my time distancing and rejecting my filipino culture.

however once i entered college and currently, i have fall in love more and more about it while continually exploring other cultures.

 

[HEATHEN]

Inspired by the Black Culture Discussion Thread

Some stereotypes we need to address:
- Lack of masculinity
- Low self confidence/self esteem
- No talents outside of studying
- Lack of success with women

How do we improve and break out of society's limitations?

IDK how anyone feels we're less masculine than western men?


If anything we're more macho and we need to tone that down a bit.


Asian nations are predominantly patriarchal. Misogyny runs rampant.


I mean, I get that in some Asian nations like Japan the fertility rate is decreasing. Dudes rather sex a computer than go up to a woman and introduce themselves. Women are becoming more empowered and guys seem to be at a stand-still in some places.


But as far as in America goes, I think most of us being American born are conditioned differently and we do better than our foreign or FOB counterparts in the woman department.


I mean if ya'll talking athletics that's subjective as well. I mean, sure a lot of Asians may not excel at American sports but thats not to say that we don't excel in other sports. As time goes on and we continue to assimilate I'm sure future generations will break into American sports.


A lot of the perception we have going against us is because of the media. The media chooses to pigeonhole us as intellectuals instead of the strong male leads.


We're not the only folks that get undermined. Latinos are also underrepresented, blacks still struggle to get certain parts in Hollywood. Stereotypes and stigmas still run rampant.


The media is still brainwashing women to believe that white men are the archetype of masculinity. That white women are the archetype of beauty.


Self-hate runs rampant. We as the younger generation, who know better, need to teach our kids better. A lot of our parents don't know better and truth be told a lot of these FOBs don't know better. They better learn tho.

 

[equality]

 
We're all different. In my experience:

1.) Lift hard and lift a lot

2.) Be confident but humble and willing to mold and learn

3.) Chase money and your own interests

4.) Dominican girls love me, so I don't know about other Asian folks

All the points you raised above usually apply to fobs / children of extreme Tiger moms.

This is true but I wonder if non-asians see it this way also. A lot of people I talk to have this impression of ALL Asians. And if they happen to meet an Asian who is confident, athletic, outgoing etc they usually describe them as  "oh he's the Asian who's pretty much white" or something similar to that

 

[wj4]

We're less masculine because we don't have blue eyes with blonde hair and the build of Captain America


Joking aside...I'm going to write my own experience below.


I was born in Southeast Asia. Came to the USA in 1994 in the 4th grade. Was automatically a loner because I spoke no English. The local Thai kids didn't accept me because I was a fob. I was cool with it, I enjoyed playing by myself and learned English Moved to a different part of town in the 7th grade, the most 'hood part. Friends were mostly Hispanic. They just called me 'chino' Cats were smoking cigs in middle school and graduated to weed in high school. Always called me names because I never took a hit, never affected me.

My mom raised me by herself. She came here with not much. Had to work odd jobs...bought flowers wholesale to flip, worked as a cook, at factories, etc. It was instilled in my heart that I cannot be a failure in life. I studied hard...became a 'nerd'. I didn't care. I was going to make it. My mentality was it was me and moms against the world. There was a thread discussing Asians within the community earlier which led to this thread. Even in the Thai community, it was real. Lots of back stabbing going on. They looked down upon my mom and me because we were the new folks on the block. They were saying that I was going to be an eff up in life because I wasn't prepared like the other Asians (kids were prepping for SATs in middle school).

Fast forward to now and 2 master's degrees later, I grew to be a compassionate person but never considered myself as 'less masculine'. You can't ever let anyone look down upon you. I turned out better than the same Asian kids that made fun of me. I dropped by the old crib like 2 years ago to see if the kids were still there. Some were and we talked. Dudes are working at Costco and just living check to check. You can have the best of both worlds. I enjoy reading and drafting business ideas as well hitting lounges and clubs and flicking da wrist.

I'm probably still considered an outcast, but I break bread with whoever is cool and positive, regardless of color. Probably why I have very little Asian friends

Lowkey...it pains my soul when I see parents moving to the states and working so hard for their kids to have a better life, but the kids don't utilize that and become screw ups.

I'm going to continue grinding until I can cop my mom a Rolls, a closet full of Hermes bags, and a crib in the hills so she can stunt on the same folks who looked down upon her/us Probably my biggest motivation in life.

As far as women goes...it gets easier when you get older, man. Especially if you're a clean cut dude who's educated. Good girls want that husband material. I can't even take these chicks I talk to at clubs and lounges seriously. Even when I'm buzzed, I still gotta tone down the intellectual level of conversations.

 

[equality]

Are south Asians welcome to this thread or should we just

Everyone is welcome

 

[JPS]

 

[jape]

and... ill just leave this here.

Mean Household Income by Ethnicity in America

Asian alone	$90,752
White alone	$79,340
Hispanic or Latino	$54,644
Black	$49,629

[th=""]Ethnic Category[/th][th=""]Mean Household Income[/th]

 

[ghenges]

From what I guess, the "First generation Asian in America experience" varies greatly between regions.

 

[freedmind2015]

There's already a thread on this topic that reached fifteen pages, why not merge this topic instead of starting a new thread?

http://niketalk.com/t/630214/asian-on-asian-racism-have-you-experienced-or-witnessed-it

 

[JPS]

 
There's already a thread on this topic that reached fifteen pages, why not merge this topic instead of starting a new thread?

http://niketalk.com/t/630214/asian-on-asian-racism-have-you-experienced-or-witnessed-it

it looks like that is a very specific topic in regards to racism experienced by asians.

and to be quite honest the racism that asians currently experienced isn't exactly the most despicable going on in the states right now

 

[HEATHEN]

it looks like that is a very specific topic in regards to racism experienced by asians.

and to be quite honest the racism that asians currently experienced isn't exactly the most despicable going on in the states right now

This, this thread is about a litany of topics, not just racism from other Asians.

 

[KingdomFlatbush]

Did yall blast the Azn Pride song all the time like the Chinese kids at my middle school did?

That song straight up made me jealous. Them Azn kids rolled deep

 

[derrtay]

When my parents first moved to North America from Vietnam during the war, they didn't speak a lick of English, but they knew they came here so that they could have a better life for my brother and I. They lost everything in the war and came with a couple ounces of gold and the clothes on their back on a fishing boat from Vietnam. They had to grind and work 3-4 jobs while going to school to get a degree for a decent job. Growing up we didn't have very much, my mom made our clothes, my dad worked night and day to support us. Eating mcdonalds was our treat every month. We finally caught a break once my dad got a huge job offer in Newport Beach(we were living in compton/paramount at the time) and we moved to Orange County. My mom always had a business mindset and she opened up her own business and we started to flourish, but we didn't lose sight of where we came from. Though the success was recent, my parents saved up all their money, driving their old raggedy cars, and not splurging on clothes or materialistic things, they managed to save up enough money to put both my brother and I through college and medical school for the both of us because they didn't want us to have to worry about loans. 

That's been my motivation since day one. I didn't care who thought I was what, I wasn't fully accepted growing up in Compton or Orange County. I stayed true to myself and my family, and they allowed me to follow my dreams. People respected that in college and life is all amazing now. My parents are retired, living in a  villa in Laguna Beach. My brother is an Emergency Room Physician, with a beautiful family. I'm graduating from medical school this year, with a Pediatric Sports Medicine internship lined up for me once I graduate. My parents didn't believe in following "Asian culture" growing up, they believed in  family, success, and happiness by any means possible. The only thing my parents forced on me was to be a good man to my wife and children when I grow up, and be selfless to those that deserve it. My brother and I embraced Vietnamese culture as we got older, and when we started to ask questions is when my parents told us that they didn't want to force anything on us until we wanted to learn it, and it's been amazing to learn about our history. 

In all honesty, perception is what you make it. I'm short, that's the only thing "asian" about me. I listen to country music and hip hop, I hunt, I play hockey and football, I have a white girl friend and I wouldn't live life any other way. I'm starting to notice that this generation of Asian kids is growing up into things outside of the typical asian jobs (lawyer, health care, etc) and it's amazing to see. I love talking to these new age  Asian american chef's, shop owners, writers, that are following their passion and excelling at it, it's such a refreshing thing to see us as a culture begin to embrace life and change with the times. 

It all starts with yourself, and how you want to live your life. Do what you want and if it fits the stereotypes then so be it, I know plenty of other races that fit into an "asian" stereotype and I don't judge them at all. I think we're at a point in society where these things don't really matter AS much anymore, outside of social media/hollywood.

 

[equality]

 
When my parents first moved to North America from Vietnam during the war, they didn't speak a lick of English, but they knew they came here so that they could have a better life for my brother and I. They lost everything in the war and came with a couple ounces of gold and the clothes on their back on a fishing boat from Vietnam. They had to grind and work 3-4 jobs while going to school to get a degree for a decent job. Growing up we didn't have very much, my mom made our clothes, my dad worked night and day to support us. Eating mcdonalds was our treat every month. We finally caught a break once my dad got a huge job offer in Newport Beach(we were living in compton/paramount at the time) and we moved to Orange County. My mom always had a business mindset and she opened up her own business and we started to flourish, but we didn't lose sight of where we came from. Though the success was recent, my parents saved up all their money, driving their old raggedy cars, and not splurging on clothes or materialistic things, they managed to save up enough money to put both my brother and I through college and medical school for the both of us because they didn't want us to have to worry about loans. 

That's been my motivation since day one. I didn't care who thought I was what, I wasn't fully accepted growing up in Compton or Orange County. I stayed true to myself and my family, and they allowed me to follow my dreams. People respected that in college and life is all amazing now. My parents are retired, living in a  villa in Laguna Beach. My brother is an Emergency Room Physician, with a beautiful family. I'm graduating from medical school this year, with a Pediatric Sports Medicine internship lined up for me once I graduate. My parents didn't believe in following "Asian culture" growing up, they believed in  family, success, and happiness by any means possible. The only thing my parents forced on me was to be a good man to my wife and children when I grow up, and be selfless to those that deserve it. My brother and I embraced Vietnamese culture as we got older, and when we started to ask questions is when my parents told us that they didn't want to force anything on us until we wanted to learn it, and it's been amazing to learn about our history. 

In all honesty, perception is what you make it. I'm short, that's the only thing "asian" about me. I listen to country music and hip hop, I hunt, I play hockey and football, I have a white girl friend and I wouldn't live life any other way. I'm starting to notice that this generation of Asian kids is growing up into things outside of the typical asian jobs (lawyer, health care, etc) and it's amazing to see. I love talking to these new age  Asian american chef's, shop owners, writers, that are following their passion and excelling at it, it's such a refreshing thing to see us as a culture begin to embrace life and change with the times. 

It all starts with yourself, and how you want to live your life. Do what you want and if it fits the stereotypes then so be it, I know plenty of other races that fit into an "asian" stereotype and I don't judge them at all. I think we're at a point in society where these things don't really matter AS much anymore, outside of social media/hollywood.

Inspiring man. Congrats on your success so far 

 NT flourishing

 

[Nouss]

Been waiting for one these threads. Asian culture is soo vast and interesting. Im def in here to learn a thing or two.

Man, NT yall set me up tho. I asked a 40+ year old Filipino coworker if he was Asian or PI and dude was legit confused.
He probably thought I didn´t know where The Phillipines were on a map lol

He assumed that its just some American thing.

 

[nomadicsole21]

I think that racism and stereotyping towards Asians in America is more mental. When I grew up as a first generation American it wasn't blatant racism I encountered. It was constant barrages of the media brainwashing you that you are this and this is how you are supposed to act and behave.

I had a tough time trying to figure this all out as an adolescent. I fought back my culture because I didn't want to be associated with all the negative stereotypes. What made my transition into American culture easier was because of sneakers and basketball. My family had a plug at Nike when we were younger so I was blessed to be rocking the newest shoes at a huge discounted price. My peers would actually dap me up and would include me into things. Built a huge passion for the NBA so talkin ball with all the kids helped me to become more "Americanized"

It took awhile for me to not be ashamed of who I was and where my parents came from. It wasn't until I started dating that I embraced my culture and ethnicity a lot more. Dated this one white chick and when her parents found out I was Asian, she wasn't allowed to continue to talk to me. Thinking all this time distancing myself from my culture would make me more accepted was naive. No matter what, if someone dislikes you for the way you look or the shade of your skin color, they will dislike you. It hit me pretty hard, because in my mind, I believed I wasnt like the other Asian dudes, but it doesn't matter what I thought, because all they will see is a yellow skinned, slanted eyed foreign kid dating their daughter.

It took a lot of soul searching and acceptance. I started to hang out with more of my Asian friends because I no longer felt ashamed to be around them. Instead of trying to fit in and trying to fight for that girl just to be cool with her parents I accepted who I was and embraced it. Now that I'm older I personally feel that even if you do or don't fit the stereotypes, just be you. I fought most of my teenage years trying to fight the Asian stereotypes but figured out that even if you are different, people who will wanna classify you will mentally do it in their head when they see you.

 

[tokes99]

not asian but i appreciate discussions about culture, it is always interesting to get other perspectives. i feel like generally ( and maybe especially in a pluralistic societies) culture & ethnicity get distilled into simplistic archetypes, so it is super interesting to see these individual narratives

If anything we're more macho and we need to tone that down a bit.


Asian nations are predominantly patriarchal. Misogyny runs rampant.


I mean, I get that in some Asian nations like Japan the fertility rate is decreasing. Dudes rather sex a computer than go up to a woman and introduce themselves. Women are becoming more empowered and guys seem to be at a stand-still in some places.


But as far as in America goes, I think most of us being American born are conditioned differently and we do better than our foreign or FOB counterparts in the woman department.


I mean if ya'll talking athletics that's subjective as well. I mean, sure a lot of Asians may not excel at American sports but thats not to say that we don't excel in other sports. As time goes on and we continue to assimilate I'm sure future generations will break into American sports.


A lot of the perception we have going against us is because of the media. The media chooses to pigeonhole us as intellectuals instead of the strong male leads.


We're not the only folks that get undermined. Latinos are also underrepresented, blacks still struggle to get certain parts in Hollywood. Stereotypes and stigmas still run rampant.


The media is still brainwashing women to believe that white men are the archetype of masculinity. That white women are the archetype of beauty.


Self-hate runs rampant. We as the younger generation, who know better, need to teach our kids better. A lot of our parents don't know better and truth be told a lot of these FOBs don't know better. They better learn tho.

not to go too far off topic, but i think the ways western/american masculinity differs from how masculinity differs in many asian cultures (at least in the relatively minute exposure i have had to asian cultures) is in the west masculinity is more of a caricature, especially in media, whereas i think in asian cultures it seems less overt and a given, the roles of men and women appear more 'fixed,' they each have certain expectations that have only recently become challenged with the increasing globalization of culture(s). the increase in female agency is happening more & more just about everywhere for different reasons and the definition of masculinity seems to be shrinking such that the only attributes left are either superficial (i.e. physicality) or outdated/symbolic (i.e.being the breadwinner). even with that being the case, the funny thing is how much we do internalize things...i have read that in many of the big asian cultural centers, it is generally considered taboo/weird women to approach men for relationships? even here in the states in 2015, most men & WOMEN think it weird for women to ask men to marry women, because 'the man is supposed to ask the woman.'

asian.


and... ill just leave this here.



Mean Household Income by Ethnicity in America

Asian alone	$90,752
White alone	$79,340
Hispanic or Latino	$54,644
Black	$49,629

[th=""] Ethnic Category [/th]

[th=""] Mean Household Income [/th]

i have seen many charts/statistics that mirror the one above and have always wondered what to make of it, one asian is such a generic descriptor to encompass such a broad spectrum of ethnicities, which i guess is all the more impressive to have that high an average, you wonder what is the commonality there? but i also wonder given that almost everything in america devolves into a binary of this or that, the black vs. white just dominates mindshare, leaving a general 'kanye shrug' type attitude about asians-especially those who would not be confused for other ethnicities (and given the rising numbers of hispanics that are swinging the demographics in many places there is even less bandwidth)

curious about the following:

We're less masculine because we don't have blue eyes with blonde hair and the build of Captain America


There was a thread discussing Asians within the community earlier which led to this thread. Even in the Thai community, it was real. Lots of back stabbing going on. They looked down upon my mom and me because we were the new folks on the block. They were saying that I was going to be an eff up in life because I wasn't prepared like the other Asians (kids were prepping for SATs in middle school).

back-stabbing? in what ways?

My parents didn't believe in following "Asian culture" growing up,...

...I think we're at a point in society where these things don't really matter AS much anymore, outside of social media/hollywood.

what was it about "asian culture" that they didn't think was worth following? and what role and how influential does social media/hollywood feel to you?

i do think that in the past there was a bit more pressure for people to want their kids to assimilate (not to the point of losing culture but to fit in), than now where it seems there is more acceptance & embracing of cultural differences; which there are pros & cons to each approach.

I think that racism and stereotyping towards Asians in America is more mental. When I grew up as a first generation American it wasn't blatant racism I encountered. It was constant barrages of the media brainwashing you that you are this and this is how you are supposed to act and behave.

I had a tough time trying to figure this all out as an adolescent. I fought back my culture because I didn't want to be associated with all the negative stereotypes. What made my transition into American culture easier was because of sneakers and basketball. My family had a plug at Nike when we were younger so I was blessed to be rocking the newest shoes at a huge discounted price. My peers would actually dap me up and would include me into things. Built a huge passion for the NBA so talkin ball with all the kids helped me to become more "Americanized"

It took awhile for me to not be ashamed of who I was and where my parents came from. It wasn't until I started dating that I embraced my culture and ethnicity a lot more. Dated this one white chick and when her parents found out I was Asian, she wasn't allowed to continue to talk to me. Thinking all this time distancing myself from my culture would make me more accepted was naive. No matter what, if someone dislikes you for the way you look or the shade of your skin color, they will dislike you. It hit me pretty hard, because in my mind, I believed I wasnt like the other Asian dudes, but it doesn't matter what I thought, because all they will see is a yellow skinned, slanted eyed foreign kid dating their daughter.

It took a lot of soul searching and acceptance. I started to hang out with more of my Asian friends because I no longer felt ashamed to be around them. Instead of trying to fit in and trying to fight for that girl just to be cool with her parents I accepted who I was and embraced it. Now that I'm older I personally feel that even if you do or don't fit the stereotypes, just be you. I fought most of my teenage years trying to fight the Asian stereotypes but figured out that even if you are different, people who will wanna classify you will mentally do it in their head when they see you.

a lot of this resonates with me, my parents too were immigrants so as a younger person i wanted to fit in more than stand out, it wasn't shame or distance i wanted but the path of least resistance because when you are a kid i think you just don't want to have always be on the defensive about who you are...but i am curious, #seriousquestion, what are the 'negative stereotypes' associated to asians?

 

[Nawzlew]

Did yall blast the Azn Pride song all the time like the Chinese kids at my middle school did?

That song straight up made me jealous. Them Azn kids rolled deep

GOT RICE *****? GOT RICE?

 

[Nawzlew]

back-stabbing? in what ways?

a lot of this resonates with me, my parents too were immigrants so as a younger person i wanted to fit in more than stand out, it wasn't shame or distance i wanted but the path of least resistance because when you are a kid i think you just don't want to have always be on the defensive about who you are...but i am curious, #seriousquestion, what are the 'negative stereotypes' associated to asians?

I just think Asian parents are EXTREMELY competitive, especially moms. Moms will literally sit around and talk about their kids accomplishments trying to one up each other. A lot of comparisons with their kids goes on.

I remember just hanging around one time. Like the parents will be real passive aggressive, but you know what they're trying to do.




As far as negative stereotypes - there are the obvious/common ones. Socially awkward, can't speak English properly, can't drive, small penis, eat dog etc ..., **** like that.

Of course we have the positive stereotypes, but that can be a negative cause a lot of people don't fit that stereotype.

"Hey do you know the answer to this?"
"No".
"But you're Asian".



btw, for the non asians, feel free to ask any questions

 

[mr marcus]

^ that's how African parents are......kids of African immigrants do really well just like Asians

Probably seems overbearing to deal with but in the end it pays off!

 

[wj4]

^Back stabbing as in they don't like it when someone shines. They mingle with one another. The Thai community is large, but it seems like almost everyone knows each other...except for a few like me because I wasn't in the circle to begin with. If someone has a business and becomes "too successful", the hate is real. They will smile in front of you, but talk crap behind you and take action to see you fail.

If you open a restaurant and its profiting, they may slander in the local newspaper saying it's not authentic or call the local health dept and say they found foreign particles in the food. They know they are secretly talking and doing these things while continuing to hang out with each other at functions and putting on fake smile. Typing from my phone mad early. Hope it makes sense. Didn't re read.