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- Apr 4, 2008
Figured this would be a nice way to start the new year. Maybe this thread could last longer than usual.
Here's one I wrote today:
Here's one I wrote today:
Film Reels Dipped in Litmus
I'm a strayed ally cat leaping for the fire escape
With my paws amputated and fur sprayed with Raid.
Every time I try to swallow, I choke from the bike lock
Wrapped around my neck that mixes chunks of chalk
Dipped in battery acid with salt water from the Nile River.
My mother would like me to roll over and pray to God to
Deliver, but the odds of survival are less than being born
Without a liver. Truth is, I'd rather taste life locked in a
Block of ice with no lips to quiver.
Too man cynical, sardonic foes live inside me, if they knew how,
Three of them would rape me. I should probably shame them,
But I want to feel the effects of termites burrowing
Into my wooden heart, and gremlins flexing in front of my
Reflective lungs. And the two giraffes playing paddle ball
With my testicles…they would get a thank you note-written
On a sheet of LSD.
I get off at the idea of having blitzkrieg bombers
Tear down the wall between sanity and libido,
Allowing me to be the first cat to suggest bestiality.
That's pretty much why every Friday I try to
Force feed myself a lobotomy, to make me
Feel more relieved and empty than any colonoscopy.
You clear your throat before you speak, I close my
Eyes because I don't want the @*!% you spew
To infect me and force me to receive an
Iridectomy from a paralyzed doctor with two hooks
For hands.
Which is why I attached a claymore to my tail, that
And I wanted to add a little flavor to the chase.
I let it clunk all the way down the street
Until I ran into a mailman using two butcher knives
To skate across his grandfather. That's when I decided
To stick my tail between my legs.
I woke up inside an empty bottle of wine, and smiled.
I may look like I belong to Edgar Allan Poe, but at least
I don't owe him anything.