Official NT dad thread: can the dads get love

[Case]

Y'all dudes with kids do around December/January better learn about the half-birthday party real quick..My son's bday is 2 weeks after Christmas and we tried for a couple years to have his bday party on his actual birth day..People never know what to buy and you never know what to tell them to get cause your kids will get everything they want for Christmas presents..We've found that doing a June party is the best cause it's far enough away from Christmas that they can get all kinds of good stuff right before summer hits..

 

[thinkinfresh]

View media item 2060147
Becoming a dad is truly the most rewarding gift, it feels like they are an extension of your soul. When my daughter cries I feel it

18 months in and I just found out I'm having a 2nd & I got my boy , He's Due Nov 13th... roughly 2 weeks before my daughters 2nd birthday... so excited to extend the family

Gonna be joining the club in December so damn excited. How long did you guys wait to tell family/friends? My wife is at 12 weeks and we just told our mom's yesterday. Visiting my dad in NY this weekend so gonna let him know then.

How many weeks did it take for you to find out the gender? Wife wants to do a ultra sound at 15 weeks to see if they can tell then.

both times we found out with the 16 week sonogram, that anticipation sucks :x

 

[wayniac211]

Maaan... Im going crazy watching my 3,4 and 5 yr old. They going nuts jumping, yelling, laughing, doing cartwheels and ****. I'm annoyed yet I tell myself that I'd rather them act like this then them sitting still showing no enjoyment acting like robots.
That would suck if I were in their shoes.

 

[kingkoopa]

Y'all dudes with kids do around December/January better learn about the half-birthday party real quick..My son's bday is 2 weeks after Christmas and we tried for a couple years to have his bday party on his actual birth day..People never know what to buy and you never know what to tell them to get cause your kids will get everything they want for Christmas presents..We've found that doing a June party is the best cause it's far enough away from Christmas that they can get all kinds of good stuff right before summer hits..

That sounds greedy as hell

 

[youngthundercat]

It's crazy to see your baby move while still in the stomach and feel the kicks. I'm def kicking into daddy mode. Had a blast shopping with my moms for babygirl room. September can't get her fast enough.

 

[Blake P]

Maaan... Im going crazy watching my 3,4 and 5 yr old. They going nuts jumping, yelling, laughing, doing cartwheels and ****. I'm annoyed yet I tell myself that I'd rather them act like this then them sitting still showing no enjoyment acting like robots.
That would suck if I were in their shoes.

Thanks for putting it in perspective. This makes me think I need to chill sometimes. My kids will be running crazy through the house for no reason (usually in the evenings when it seems like they should be winding down) and I'll scold them to stop running in the house because it doesn't seem like appropriate indoor behavior, but I guess they're just kids having fun.

 

[wayniac211]

Thanks for putting it in perspective. This makes me think I need to chill sometimes. My kids will be running crazy through the house for no reason (usually in the evenings when it seems like they should be winding down) and I'll scold them to stop running in the house because it doesn't seem like appropriate indoor behavior, but I guess they're just kids having fun.

99% of the time it is.. It's to the point where I participate in the bafoonery with them for the lulz... My thing is when they fight. Irritates the **** outta me.

 

[Blake P]

99% of the time it is.. It's to the point where I participate in the bafoonery with them for the lulz... My thing is when they fight. Irritates the **** outta me.

My son bit my daughter's arm the other night fighting over a toy and I thought I was gonna lose my *****. Still not sure I handled the situation right cuz at the end my poor daughter was apologizing to him, "I sawwy bwudda." #dadfail

 

[DadNboujee]

View media item 2060147
Becoming a dad is truly the most rewarding gift, it feels like they are an extension of your soul. When my daughter cries I feel it

18 months in and I just found out I'm having a 2nd & I got my boy , He's Due Nov 13th... roughly 2 weeks before my daughters 2nd birthday... so excited to extend the family
both times we found out with the 16 week sonogram, that anticipation sucks :x

My kids birthdays are 3 days apart. Separated by 2 years

2 kids is definitely not 2 times harder, it's 5 times. Especially when they are both young.

 

[a55a5in11]

Me and my now wife got married last month May 6th. Our 13 month old daughter was the flower girl... kinda

View media item 2060389

 

[kingkoopa]

My son bit my daughter's arm the other night fighting over a toy and I thought I was gonna lose my *****. Still not sure I handled the situation right cuz at the end my poor daughter was apologizing to him, "I sawwy bwudda." #dadfail

We all fail at times.

That's one thing I hate, people without kids thinking they know how to be the perfect parent no such thing.

 

[wayniac211]

My son bit my daughter's arm the other night fighting over a toy and I thought I was gonna lose my *****. Still not sure I handled the situation right cuz at the end my poor daughter was apologizing to him, "I sawwy bwudda." #dadfail

You good famb. I snap the back of the earlobe when they cause harm towards each other especially when it's intentional. At least your daughter has empathy for bro bro. That there is a W.

 

[stunnaman]

Y'all dudes with kids do around December/January better learn about the half-birthday party real quick..My son's bday is 2 weeks after Christmas and we tried for a couple years to have his bday party on his actual birth day..People never know what to buy and you never know what to tell them to get cause your kids will get everything they want for Christmas presents..We've found that doing a June party is the best cause it's far enough away from Christmas that they can get all kinds of good stuff right before summer hits..

i know that feel my birthday is Dec 30th..i stayed getting screwed 

 

[youngthundercat]

thats crazy my bday is 12/30 too...i guess my parents let me know from the jump its just one big present. As for the bday it was like my favorite food spot or something simple. 

 

[Fozz]

So, my wife admitted to me that she experience Postpartum depression when our daughter was born and is beginning to feel like it again. I was in shock and felt like I'm failing as a husband because I don't know exactly what to do to help her.

She mentioned how she feels her day is a routine taking care of our daughter at home and sometimes cant feel the joy in caring for her.

Has any of their GFs/Wives experienced this? If so, how did you help them out? 

One solution that we both decided on was to break out of our routine through out the week. Walk/Jog when I get home and make an effort to spend more time with our close friends (It's a challenge since we live about an hour plus to frequently hang out)

This news caught me off guard last night and I really tried hard to not let it bother me, but it is. 

 

[lucho]

 
So, my wife admitted to me that she experience Postpartum depression when our daughter was born and is beginning to feel like it again. I was in shock and felt like I'm failing as a husband because I don't know exactly what to do to help her.

She mentioned how she feels her day is a routine taking care of our daughter at home and sometimes cant feel the joy in caring for her.

Has any of their GFs/Wives experienced this? If so, how did you help them out? 

One solution that we both decided on was to break out of our routine through out the week. Walk/Jog when I get home and make an effort to spend more time with our close friends (It's a challenge since we live about an hour plus to frequently hang out)

This news caught me off guard last night and I really tried hard to not let it bother me, but it is. 

You're not failing. As much as it can be a shock and suck, the fact that she told you is a big step in the right direction. 

One thing that i have tried to do since our second came along is let her out of the house as much as possible, whether it be by herself or with our 2 year old son. It can be very routine for her during the week being at home with a newborn (our son goes to daycare during the day) and doing the same things over and over. If i can let her have some time with her friends, or get out for a couple hours with our son, i think it gives her a break. 

If friends are a bit of a drive away, things like pedicures and massages could give her a sense of feeling refreshed.

 

[Blake P]

You're not failing. As much as it can be a shock and suck, the fact that she told you is a big step in the right direction. 

One thing that i have tried to do since our second came along is let her out of the house as much as possible, whether it be by herself or with our 2 year old son. It can be very routine for her during the week being at home with a newborn (our son goes to daycare during the day) and doing the same things over and over. If i can let her have some time with her friends, or get out for a couple hours with our son, i think it gives her a break. 

If friends are a bit of a drive away, things like pedicures and massages could give her a sense of feeling refreshed.

All great suggestions. I try to take over as much of the parenting duties when I get home as I possibly can. This gives my wife a chance to do whatever she wants for an hour or two before we put the kids to bed, then obviously we get some downtime after that. I try not to hassle her about going out with her friends every week or two for dinner, but gotta be honest that 2+ hour dinner, bath, bedtime routine is so much easier with her help, especially if one of the kids isn't feeling well or needs some extra attention.

 

[Fozz]

 
You're not failing. As much as it can be a shock and suck, the fact that she told you is a big step in the right direction. 

One thing that i have tried to do since our second came along is let her out of the house as much as possible, whether it be by herself or with our 2 year old son. It can be very routine for her during the week being at home with a newborn (our son goes to daycare during the day) and doing the same things over and over. If i can let her have some time with her friends, or get out for a couple hours with our son, i think it gives her a break. 

If friends are a bit of a drive away, things like pedicures and massages could give her a sense of feeling refreshed.

Thanks for the encouragement.

All great suggestions. I try to take over as much of the parenting duties when I get home as I possibly can. This gives my wife a chance to do whatever she wants for an hour or two before we put the kids to bed, then obviously we get some downtime after that. I try not to hassle her about going out with her friends every week or two for dinner, but gotta be honest that 2+ hour dinner, bath, bedtime routine is so much easier with her help, especially if one of the kids isn't feeling well or needs some extra attention.

I agree with both of your suggestions. I, too, do my best to give her a break the rest of the night once I get home. 

Idk, I've been wanting to give her a Spa-Day and have her get pampered, but we just haven't had the time. 

 

[Blake P]

 
Thanks for the encouragement.

I agree with both of your suggestions. I, too, do my best to give her a break the rest of the night once I get home. 

Idk, I've been wanting to give her a Spa-Day and have her get pampered, but we just haven't had the time. 

I don't claim to know anything about postpartum or how to deal with it, but just know that many women have a hard time going from being around adults and having some control over their daily schedule to being around helpless babies and losing complete control.  Unfortunately, that's something they need to reconcile in their own mind and you can't really help, except for being able to listen and provide support as needed.  Obviously a spa day will be a nice relaxing time for her, but that doesn't change her every day reality.

 

[wayniac211]

So, my wife admitted to me that she experience Postpartum depression when our daughter was born and is beginning to feel like it again. I was in shock and felt like I'm failing as a husband because I don't know exactly what to do to help her.

She mentioned how she feels her day is a routine taking care of our daughter at home and sometimes cant feel the joy in caring for her.

Has any of their GFs/Wives experienced this? If so, how did you help them out? 

One solution that we both decided on was to break out of our routine through out the week. Walk/Jog when I get home and make an effort to spend more time with our close friends (It's a challenge since we live about an hour plus to frequently hang out)

This news caught me off guard last night and I really tried hard to not let it bother me, but it is. 

It's not you bruh. It's her. Tell her to man up. JK..
I think it's 8/10 woman go through this stage. So it's normal. Walking is good idea. One on one time and creating adventures can help out as well. After our 3rd kiddo my wife went threw a slump. One day I decided to burn some greenery and urged her to burn as well. **** was hilarious and we had the craziest time that day. Pillow talk helps as well. Talking about inner **** like secrets and motivational talk. **** is hard especially because we've got to LISTEN

 

[lazyj10]

Ask her how she's feeling from time to time.

My wife felt something similar, and I was probably too dismissive or missed some signs.

Fact is, most, if not all women go through this to some degree. It really has little to do you or how you are as a father/husband.

We're getting to the stage of weaning him off breast feeding, and she already had mentioned how it makes her a little sad given the connection she feels with our son because of it. So I'm definately listening closely to what she's saying and how she's feeling. Sometimes, that's all you can do.

Edit - I also make sure to tell my wife how proud I am of her for taking raising our son as her primary responsbility and the efforts she puts into her days. After watching him by myself I am usally quick to tell her I get how hard it can be. Basically, don't take for granted just telling your wife how great of a mom she is and how you see it, too.

 

[youngthundercat]

postpartum has me scared...i love my lady but she already can be a little over the top emotionally and sensitive. im bout to tell her homegirls they have to steal her couple nights for convo and drinks. 

 

[the 718 truth]

I'll echo the sentiments that have already been stated. The most important part is communication. If my wife felt overwhelmed she'd let me know and I'd take over baby duties as soon as I got home from work so she could step out and get some air and Take her time. I'd send her to go get her hair or nails done, or light shopping or she'd just go for a walk by herself or with her dad who happens to live a few blocks away. I think just getting out of the house and breaking up the routine is a big help.

 

[Proposition Joe]

I have a six and a two year old and I'm so scared of them growing up in this social media generation


http://wfla.com/2016/06/08/girl-15-commits-suicide-after-friends-share-nude-snapchat-video/

 

[youngthundercat]

I have a six and a two year old and I'm so scared of them growing up in this social media generation


http://wfla.com/2016/06/08/girl-15-commits-suicide-after-friends-share-nude-snapchat-video/

A 15 year old down the street committed suicide like 2 months ago bc she was being bullied. That's why I hope me and my daughter have that relationship were she tells me everything.